19. Nash
Chapter 19
Nash
T he bright stage lights hit Easton and me as we rehearsed for tomorrow’s benefit concert. The sound of our guitars blended into the air, but despite the adrenaline buzzing through me, my mind wasn’t really focused on the music.
Richard was pacing at the side of the stage, taking notes and occasionally shouting out adjustments. He was always professional, dressed to the nines even in the heat of mid-July, always the one to make sure everything was running smoothly—even if he was juggling everything at once. He was in control. Me? I was focused on something else entirely.
I glanced over at Easton, who was deep in concentration, his fingers moving expertly over his guitar. His face was set in the way it always was when he was in his element, but I could see the subtle shift in his posture—he noticed me. He always noticed when something was off.
“Everything alright?” Easton asked, his voice low but full of concern as the final chord of the song lingered in the air. Richard was still muttering to himself, oblivious to our conversation.
I took a deep breath, trying to shake off the unease settling in my chest. “Yeah, I’m good. Just... a little anxious, I guess.”
Easton tilted his head, his brow furrowing in that familiar way, like he knew me better than I knew myself sometimes. “About the concert?”
I nodded. “Yeah. It’s a big deal for me, East. Raising money for Dawn and her family, doing something good... that’s all exciting. But the thought of getting back out there, in front of the spotlight, playing music, the crowds... It just feels... I don’t know, like I’m stepping back into something I left behind.”
He set his guitar down and walked over to where I was half-sitting on a black equipment case by the side of the stage, his expression softening. “You’re not going back to something you left behind, Nash. You’re just... doing what you need to do. For the cause, for Dawn, for yourself. We’ve been out of the spotlight for a while, but that doesn’t mean we have to lose what we’ve built here. Helping Dawn, being part of something good... That doesn’t disappear the moment the lights come back on.”
I let his words sink in, nodding absentmindedly, but it wasn’t easy. Part of me felt like the ranch, the work I was doing with Dawn, gave me something I hadn’t had in years. Purpose. Stability. I wasn’t just another face in the crowd; I was part of something that mattered. But the reality of playing again—the crowds, the pressure, the chaos of it all—it felt like I was stepping away from that peace.
“I don’t know if I can do both,” I admitted quietly. “The stage and this... it’s like two different versions of me. I don’t know how to merge them.”
Easton chuckled softly, clapping me on the back. “You don’t have to. You just gotta be yourself. If anything, this is the perfect opportunity to show everyone the real Nash—who you are now, not who you were or the mistakes you made. And I know you. You’ll make it work. You’re not alone in this, man.”
I met his gaze, and the anxiety in my chest eased for a moment. Easton had always been that rock for me, the steady hand when I needed it most. He’d never pressured me to choose between music and everything else in my life. He just wanted me to be happy, and maybe that was enough.
“I just... don’t want to regret it, you know?” I confessed, the weight of the decision settling on me again. “I’ve been running from my past for so long. What if I fall back into old habits? What if I go back to being the guy I used to be?”
Easton’s smile was small, but something undeniably reassuring was in it. His arms crossed on his chest, and his whole demeanor was calm and steady. “Then don’t fall back. Move forward. You’ve come so far already, Nash. And if you need to step back from it all when it’s over, I’ll be here. You know that.”
I took a long, steadying breath, letting his words settle into my mind. Maybe I didn’t have to figure it all out right now. Perhaps I just had to take it one step at a time.
“I’ll do my best,” I finally said, looking out at the empty ground before the stage. The spotlight was a little less blinding now, but the weight of my future still rested heavily on my shoulders.
Easton grinned and threw an arm around me. “That’s all anyone can ask for. But if you need a reminder, I’ve got your back. Always.”
“Thanks, man,” I said, feeling the weight in my chest lift just a little. Maybe I didn’t have to have it all figured out, and perhaps that was enough. For tomorrow, I would play, and I would do it for Dawn and the ranch. And maybe, just maybe, that would be enough to clarify my thoughts.
* * *
The rehearsal had left my mind buzzing with excitement and anxiety. I needed to focus on the concert and on raising money for Dawn and her family, but as soon as I stepped off the stage, the weight of it all seemed to press down on me. Easton’s words echoed in my mind, mixing with my fears.
I took a deep breath, rubbing the back of my neck, when I spotted them—Dawn and Willow—standing by a cowboy’s boot stand near the edge of the festival grounds.
Willow was talking to the vendor, her smile wide and playful, making her intentions clear. The cowboy was eating it up, practically grinning from ear to ear. But Dawn, standing next to her, looked... well, bored. She was leaning against a post with her arms crossed, her face carrying the kind of expression that could be described as ‘patiently tolerating.’ She didn’t seem like she was having much fun.
The moment she saw me, though, something shifted. Her posture straightened, her eyes flicking over to me, and suddenly, she wasn’t just standing there. She was waiting for me.
That familiar flutter hit my chest, the one I couldn’t shake when she looked at me like that. Her short jean shorts were new, indicating that she didn’t have to train today, and her tight brown top with thin straps hugged her curves. I couldn’t tear my eyes from her and couldn’t help the growing sensation in my groin.
“Hey,” I said, striding over, trying to hide the effect she had on me by just standing there. “Looks like Willow’s got her hands full.”
Willow didn’t look at all bothered. She was practically batting her lashes at the vendor, laughing at whatever nonsense they were talking about. On the other hand, Dawn just gave a small roll of her eyes and smiled, and I could tell she was thinking the same thing I was—Willow’s charm was unstoppable.
“Willow’s got a way of making everything fun,” Dawn said, pushing herself off the post. “And here I am, stuck holding the candle.”
I chuckled. “I’m pretty sure you’re not really needed here.”
Dawn raised an eyebrow at me, then shifted her gaze to Willow, still deep in conversation with the vendor. “Well, it’s not like I’m enjoying the view here either.”
I didn’t respond at first, just watching how her lips curled up in that subtle smile. My gaze lingered a little longer than it probably should’ve, and I had to look away before my attraction to her showed too much.
“Wanna get out of here for a bit?” I asked, nodding toward the festival grounds.
She tilted her head, her interest piqued. “What, you mean you’re done with the practice already?”
“I’m not really needed for the rest of it,” I smirked. “I figured I could use a break from all the glamour of the stage. How about you?”
Dawn shot a glance back at Willow, who was now laughing even harder, making her roll her eyes playfully. “Yeah, sure. Lead the way.”
We made our way through the crowd, and I couldn’t help but notice the way people reacted to us—some giving us nods of acknowledgment, while others practically stared at Dawn and me as if the next big gossip were writing itself. I wanted to hold her hand, put my arm around her waist, and show the world she was mine. But I restrained myself, reminding myself that we hadn’t put a label on what we were. I didn’t even know if she wanted to be seen with me that way.
I quickly directed us toward a food stand, trying to distract myself. The typical smell of fried food made my stomach groan.
“So, what’s on your mind?” I asked, taking a bite of my corn dog, hoping the small, normal action would calm the nerves creeping up again.
Dawn glanced at me, her eyes scanning the various kiosks and food stands. “Not much. Just... the usual.”
“The usual being?”
She shrugged, her lips quirking into a small, half-smile. “The usual being the fact that my family’s future is riding on a concert that’s about to happen, and I’m standing in the middle of a fairground eating junk food instead of preparing for a crisis.”
I winced at the reminder but kept my voice light. “I’m pretty sure the junk food is doing wonders for your stress level.”
She laughed, but there was a flicker of something in her eyes that I couldn’t quite place. It was as if her thoughts were far away, focused on something else entirely.
“You’re not wrong,” she said quietly. “I just... I want it to work out, you know? I want everything to go the way it’s supposed to. I want to get my family through this… and I want you to find your stardom again.”
I nodded, biting my tongue for a moment before speaking. Did I want to get my fame back? “We’ll make it happen—all of it. You’ve got the support, Dawn. And I’ve got your back. Whatever happens after that, we’ll deal with it.”
She glanced up at me, meeting my gaze with an intensity that made my stomach flip. “Thanks, Nash. I—I don’t know if I tell you enough how much that means.”
I didn’t know how to respond right away, so I just smiled at her, offering a reassuring squeeze to her hand before letting go reluctantly.
We kept walking, talking about everything and nothing. The festival lights twinkled around us, and for a moment, it felt like it was just us—no pressure, no concert to worry about, just two people sharing a night out. And despite the anxiety that lingered in the back of my mind about returning to the stage, being with Dawn made the whole thing seem a little less overwhelming. Maybe I could do this and find a way to hold onto the peace I had found at the ranch.
But as we walked, I couldn’t shake the feeling that the concert—this show—would change things in ways I probably wasn’t ready for.
We slowly made our way toward a less crowded area, hearing the screams and cheers fade in the background. The night had settled itself, and the stars were out. The beautiful warm temperature allowed us to stay in light summer clothes.
My arms itched to be around Dawn’s shoulders, her sweet perfume invading my senses. We stopped by a tall tree overlooking the festival, which was still going strong in the distance.
I guessed we were far enough from curious eyes, and I just couldn’t help it. I hugged Dawn tightly, appreciating the moment and how her presence made me feel calm and steady. She didn’t pull away. Instead, she leaned into me, her head resting lightly against my chest, and for a moment, neither of us spoke.
“You’re quiet,” she said softly, her voice barely above a whisper. “That’s not like you.”
I smiled, my fingers brushing along her shoulder. “Guess I’m just enjoying the moment.”
She tilted her head back to look at me, her chin resting on my chest, her lips twitching into a faint smirk. Her eyes searched mine. “You’re trouble, you know that?”
Trouble. She was right in a way, even if she said it playfully. I shook up her entire life, changed her ways of doing things, and put the spotlight on her family and ranch. She was as peaceful as one could be before I stormed in. Maybe she wanted to go back to her old life, away from rumor mills and camera flashes. I pushed the doubt deep inside me and responded lightheartedly.
“Maybe.” My hand slid lower, brushing her round ass through her jean shorts, and I felt the soft hitch of her breath. “But you’re still here with me, aren’t you?”
She rolled her eyes, but it lacked any real annoyance. “You’re lucky you’re charming. Otherwise, I’d have walked away by now.”
“You wouldn’t have made it five steps before I stopped you,” I teased, my grin widening.
She laughed, the sound warm and soft, and it made my chest feel lighter. “You’re impossible.”
“Impossible,” I murmured, brushing my lips on hers, “but entertaining, right?”
“You’re something else, that’s for sure,” she said, her voice quieter now, more serious. “I don’t know if I should be scared or amazed.”
“Hopefully amazed,” I grinned, lifting her hand and pressing a light kiss into her palm. Her skin was warm against my lips, and when I glanced up, her cheeks were flushed in the soft moonlight.
She looked away, biting her lips. I couldn’t tell what she was thinking, and I wasn’t sure I was ready to question her about it. But even if the worst could happen, I mustered my courage. Honestly, what would the worst be for me... that she asked me to stop whatever was going on between us, or that she asked me to stay with her and put a stop to my music career? Deep down, I knew the answer I wanted, but I couldn’t face it yet.
“Hey… Are you okay?” I pressed.
“Yeah… I just don’t want it to be complicated, you know? I only want to enjoy the moment and not overthink everything.” She sighed.
I didn’t ask her to deepen her thoughts, as a mix of fear and anticipation rushed through me. What was clear was that she wanted something simple. I just didn’t know if I could give her that.
I knew I had to leave for the Red Dirt RendezVous in a couple of days, and after that, if everything went according to plan, we would get back in the studio to finish our album. Concerts, tours, interviews, and award shows were all on the table from then on. That didn’t sound easy or simple to me. It even sounded like a nightmare, if I was being honest.
What I could give her, though, was fun. I could make her “enjoy the moment,” as she said.
I tilted her head slightly, two fingers pushing gently on her chin.
I stayed quiet, only kissing her lips tenderly, trying to pass everything I wanted to say in it—words I couldn’t articulate even for myself. I passed my tongue into her mouth, reaching hers tentatively.
A soft moan escaped her mouth and coursed through me, making me dizzy. She passed her hands on my chest, caressing my body and making me shiver.
“Trying to have fun, princess?” I asked softly, wanting confirmation of what she was looking for.
“I have a payback to make,” she said, grinning.
“What?” I didn’t understand what she was saying until she got down on her knees in front of me.
“Dawn, what are you doing?” I whispered, looking around us to make sure we were alone.
“Someone will see you, you can’t?—”
“Nervous, cowboy?” She winked.
Nerves and heat coursed rapidly through my blood, making it boil. Fuck, she was hot—so confident in every move, sure of herself.
We needed to be quiet, even though we were alone at the top of the hill. I didn’t want Dawn ending up on the cover of a newspaper for gross indecency.
She swiftly unbuttoned my pants and unzipped them. My bulge grew harder by the second. I saw her lick her lips as her hand slid into my boxers. My cock was stiff and hot, thick veins pulsing under and over it.
“Damn, you’re big. I don’t know how you fit inside of me.”
I didn’t have time to make a snarky remark as she placed her lips at the tip. I could feel the beads of precum there. She cupped my heavy balls and let her tongue slip out to lick the head of my cock.
I was throbbing, the excitement barely contained. This woman could make me come just by looking at me. She licked from the base of my cock to its tip and then pushed it into her mouth.
“Ah, fuck, Dawn. Fuck.”
She began to pump, sucking the life out of me. Her warm, wet tongue swirled around me, making me lose my fucking mind.
“You feel so good, baby.” I gently passed my hand along her right cheek, wanting to see her eyes.
The sight of her kneeling before me, her mouth full, saliva dripping from the corners of her lips, almost undid me. Our eyes locked, each of us watching the effect we had on one another. The sensation of her was transcendent, the warmth of her mouth overwhelming. It was dirty and intimate, obscene and yet strangely endearing.
As she slipped her hand inside her shorts, I couldn’t take it anymore.
“I need to be inside you, princess,” I said.
“You already are.” She smirked, pulling my cock out of her mouth with a “pop.” Brat.
I took her under her arms and lifted her quickly. I kissed her, wanting to taste myself on her tongue. Fuck. She was everything. My heart was pounding in my chest—euphoria and uncertainty blending together.
I turned her so that she faced the big oak. One last look around us reassured me that there were no spectators.
Safe and sound.
I grabbed her shorts and quickly pulled them down. I kicked her legs open as she arched her back.
“What do you want, princess? Tell me. I need to hear you.”
“You, Nash, I want you.”
“Use your words, baby. What do you want?” I kissed the nape of her neck.
“I need you to fuck me, Nash. Hard.”
I groaned against her back. “That’s it, baby.”
In one swift move, I filled her, my balls slapping against her ass. She let out a moan that made me cover her mouth with my hand.
“That’s good, baby. You like feeling so full?”
She nodded, backing against my cock, wanting more friction. I didn’t wait long, giving in to her silent demand. I pounded into her tight pussy, hearing the wet sounds with each thrust. Sweat beads appeared on my forehead. Dawn moaned against my hand, biting it to prevent herself from screaming with pleasure.
“I’m fucking gone for you, Dawn, you have no idea.” The words escaped before I could think. Each punishing thrust made my pelvis clap against her core.
“Nash,” she cried through my fingers. She was close, and I was right behind her.
“Next time I fuck you, princess, it’ll be somewhere you can scream my name.”
I pressed my index finger against her clit, circling it steadily.
“Oh, fuck, it’s too much,” she mumbled.
“That’s it, baby. Come for me. You’re so good.”
My entire body shook with hers, muscles tensing, abs contracting. I came again and again inside of her, marking her as mine.
Burying my head in the crook of her neck, I tried to regain my breath. It felt so good to be together, our bodies slick with sweat, completely satisfied.
I tenderly redressed her and turned her toward me. My eyes fixed on hers, heavy with lust and affection. We were lost in our own world, holding on to each other. For a moment, there was nothing else—just the two of us, holding each other close, not wanting to let go.