Chapter 70
ALEX
The bathroom door clicked shut behind me, and for a second I just stood there, leaning back against it, eyes squeezed shut. The quiet pressed in around me, too still, too close, and my breath caught somewhere high in my throat.
I set the clothes down on the counter, my fingers trembling even though I tried to steady them. The jumper looked soft. The joggers too. Everything Kai had picked was warm, gentle, safe. And somehow that made my chest ache even more.
I lifted the hem of my jumper, just a little, and pain shot through my ribs so sharply I had to bite down on a sound. I couldn’t make noise. Noise meant attention. Noise meant-
I forced the thought away, swallowing hard.
I tried again, slower this time, but even that made me wince. My hands fumbled with the fabric, clumsy and uncooperative. Every bruise felt like it was pulsing under my skin. Every breath felt too shallow.
I braced one hand on the sink, the cool porcelain grounding me for a moment, and stared down at the floor tiles, willing myself not to cry, not to fall apart, not to be weak. Not here. Not in Kai’s house. Not after everything he’d already done for me.
I managed to get undressed, but the look of myself in the mirror startled me. It always did, but this time it hit harder - maybe because the bathroom light was brighter, or maybe because I couldn’t hide behind adrenaline anymore.
The bruises. So many bruises.
They looked worse than they felt, and they already felt awful. My stomach twisted, a wave of nausea rolling through me as I took myself in - the yellowing patches, the deep purples, the angry reds. I looked… ruined. Like someone had taken me apart and put me back together wrong.
Then I noticed my arm.
It was bleeding.
I hadn’t realised - not against my dark clothes - but my white shirt sleeve had a smear of red on it. Fresh. Bright. I swallowed hard, lifting my arm to look closer.
It was the burns. The scabs had come loose from Connor’s shoe. Around them were bruises - bruises from me trying to hide myself, trying to curl in, trying to stop his boot from connecting with my ribs.
I turned on the tap and washed my arm under the sink, wincing as the water hit raw skin. It stung sharply, but I kept going, jaw tight, breath shallow. I didn’t want to leave blood on Kai’s clothes. I didn’t want him to see this. Any of this.
When the bleeding slowed, I grabbed Kai’s joggers and stepped into them carefully. Even bending that little bit made my ribs scream, but I managed. Then came the jumper.
It was harder.
I had to stop a few times, breathing through the pain, waiting for the room to stop tilting. My hands shook. My ribs throbbed. My arm burned. But eventually, I got it over my head.
Not without stumbling, though. My foot caught on the bath mat and I lurched forward, bracing both hands against the sink with a quiet thud.
I froze.
Completely still.
Listening.
Because even here - even safe - my body expected consequences.
But there was nothing. Just the hum of the house. Just my own uneven breathing.
I closed my eyes, trying to steady myself, trying to pretend I wasn’t shaking.
I had to pull it together before I walked out. I had to look okay. I had to.
Slow steps stopped outside the door.
“Are you okay in there?” Kai’s voice drifted through, soft but laced with concern.
“I’m… I’m fine,” I said, trying not to sound breathless. “I’m coming out.”
I unlatched the door and peeked around it slowly.
Kai was standing right there, leaning against the frame like he’d been holding himself up with it. Kate hovered in the archway behind him, worry etched into her brow.
I forced a smile, clutching my dirty clothes to my chest.
“I’ll pop those in the wash, shall I?” Kate said gently as she walked over and took them from me.
“Thanks,” I muttered, embarrassed by how small my voice sounded.
Kai’s smile warmed a little. “Not too big, I hope.”
I glanced down at the joggers drowning my legs. “I think I need to grow,” I said, cheeks heating.
“No,” he said immediately, shaking his head. “You’re perfect.”
My face went even hotter. “Even with no hair?” I mumbled, the words slipping out before I could stop them. My expression dropped, and I knew he saw it.
Kai’s eyes softened, sympathy flickering across his face.
“Even with no hair,” he said, and he leaned in to press a gentle kiss to my forehead.
For a moment, I let myself breathe.
But when he pulled back, I caught the way his eyes scanned me - slow, careful - and how they lingered on my neck a little too long. I didn’t need a mirror to know why. The bruises were there. From his hand around my throat. They’d been hidden under my school shirt earlier.
He tore his gaze away, forcing a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.
And I pretended not to notice.
“Come on,” Kai said gently as we walked back into the kitchen.
I sat on the stool again, hiding the wince that tried to break through, and wrapped my hands around the warm mug.
“Are you hungry?” Kate asked. “I can cook something up.”
I looked at Kai before I even realised I was doing it. I didn’t want to be a burden. Didn’t want Kate going out of her way because of me. Didn’t want to take up space I didn’t deserve.
Kai caught the look, his brows furrowing for a moment before he turned to his mum.
“Uhm, sure,” he said with a small smile, answering for both of us.
“What do you want? I can put some pasta on,” she said. “Do you like cheese?”
Her eyebrows lifted at me, and I nodded quickly. Too quickly. She smiled - then her eyes narrowed, her expression changing.
“You’re bleeding.”
My stomach dropped. Her gaze drifted to my sleeve, and I followed it. Red was seeping through Kai’s grey jumper.
“Oh…” I breathed, looking down at it. My instinct was immediate - hide my arm, hide the mess, hide me . “I’m sorry, Kai,” I said before I even knew the words were coming out. I hadn’t wanted to get blood on his clothes.
He sighed. “Please stop saying sorry,” he said softly, screwing his brows. “Does it hurt?”
I shook my head even though it did. The lie felt automatic, like muscle memory.
“Do you want me to take a look at it?” Kate asked, stepping toward us slowly, like she didn’t want to spook me.
“I’m fine,” I said quickly.
“I am a nurse, you know,” she said, her eyes warming, softening. “Let me help you.”
Kai gave me a look - gentle, knowing, patient. The kind that made my chest tighten.
I exhaled, shoulders sinking, and nodded faintly.
He stayed close as Kate approached, her steps slow and deliberate, like she didn’t want to startle me. I kept my arm tucked in against my side, but she gave me a soft, patient look - the kind that made hiding feel pointless.
“Let me see, sweetheart,” she said gently.
I hesitated, then loosened my grip on my sleeve. Kai didn’t say anything, but I felt him there - warm, steady, a quiet anchor at my side.
Kate reached for my arm with careful hands, turning it just enough to see the blood. Her touch was feather-light, but even that made me flinch. I tried to hide it. Failed.
“Sorry,” I muttered, without even thinking about it.
“Don’t apologise,” she said, her voice warm but firm.
She slowly lifted my sleeve and I watched her expression shift - not shock, not horror, just a deep, quiet sadness. The kind that made my stomach twist.
“This must sting,” she murmured.
“It’s fine,” I lied automatically.
Kai shot me a look - the kind that said he knew exactly how much it wasn’t.
Kate grabbed a clean cloth from the drawer, ran it under warm water, and pressed it gently to my arm. The heat made the raw skin throb, and I sucked in a breath through my teeth.
“Sorry, love,” she said softly. “I know it hurts. I’m just cleaning it.”
I nodded, jaw tight.
Kai stepped a little closer, his hand brushing my back - not quite touching, but close enough that I felt it. Felt him. It steadied me more than I wanted to admit.
Kate dabbed away the blood, revealing the angry red burns beneath, the bruising around them. Her breath caught, just slightly.
“These need dressing,” she said quietly, moving away. “I’ll get the first aid kit.”
I felt Kai watching me, and it made something flutter uncomfortably in my chest - not fear, not exactly, just the weight of being seen . “It looks worse than it is,” I whispered, swallowing hard.
Kai’s brow tightened, his eyes narrowing just a fraction. “Are they from cigarettes?”
The question hit me like a jolt. Not because he sounded angry - he didn’t - but because he sounded like he already knew the answer and hated it.
I hesitated, my breath stuttering. Then I nodded slowly.
Kai inhaled sharply through his nose, the kind of breath someone takes when they’re trying very, very hard not to react.
His jaw clenched, a muscle ticking in the side of his cheek.
He didn’t move away from me - if anything, he leaned in closer - but the air around him shifted, charged with something tight and furious.
Kai’s voice, when it finally came, was low and rough around the edges. “He burned you.”
It wasn’t a question. It wasn’t even a statement. It was a verdict.
I looked down at my lap, heat crawling up my neck. “It wasn’t- I mean, it’s not that bad.”
Kai let out a quiet, disbelieving breath - almost a laugh, but without any humour in it. “Alex,” he said, my name sounding like something fragile in his mouth, “you don’t get to call that ‘not that bad.’”
“I’m fine, Kai,” I said, nodding my head and before he could reply Kate returned with the first-aid kit tucked under her arm, her expression soft but focused - the kind of look that made it clear she’d already switched into nurse mode.
I sat there with my arm resting on the counter, Kai still close enough that I could feel the warmth of him even without touching.
“Alright, sweetheart,” she said gently as she set the kit down. “Let’s have a proper look.”
I swallowed, my stomach tightening. I didn’t pull away, but every part of me wanted to.