30. Don’t Let Me Fall
30
DON’T LET ME FALL
KYLIE
Watching Seth and the rest of the team while they joke around with the kids is doing all sorts of stupid things to my heart. I’ve been fighting off the butterflies in my stomach ever since I saw him standing in the doorway of my grandparents’ house, dressed in his jersey and jeans, with his cap on backwards. It should be illegal how hot this man is.
While Seth has been present with each of the children while he’s signed merch for them and posed for photos, his eyes have never strayed far from where I’m standing with two of the wives, Bethany, a blonde woman who could be a supermodel, from LA and Clara, a pretty, curvy redhead from Louisiana.
“So, how long have you known Seth?” Clara asks in her amazing southern accent.
“We met in Europe over the summer. We were on the same tour.”
“Oh, that’s right, Seth’s little mental health break,” Bethany says, and I detect some attitude in her tone .
I tilt my head while Clara looks at her with raised eyebrows. “Wow, that was harsh.”
Bethany has the sense to look apologetic, but I’ve already worked out she’s not someone I want to get to know too well.
Clara seems nice, though.
We’re eventually joined by Sarah and Tory, the wife of one of the assistant coaches, and the women chat amongst themselves, including me enough to help me feel at ease. Other than Bethany, the rest of them seem fairly down to earth and friendly. I hadn’t realised how many members of the team were from different countries, which makes me feel a little less out of place. Although Sarah is from eastern Canada and the rest of them are from the U. S, they’ve told me there are a few Europeans amongst the WAGS - which I learnt stands for Wives and Girlfriends. I’m not sure how I feel about that acronym.
One thing they all have in common, however, is their love for designer labels. I feel decidedly out of place in my Target jeans, but I have never been interested in fashion, so I figure they can accept me as I am.
“How’s everything going?” Lincoln has wandered over, taking a break.
“Fine. You guys are in high demand,” I reply, nodding towards the long line weaving through the hospital cafeteria.
He stretches his arms above his head, exposing a hint of his rock hard abs, and I notice a couple of mothers eyeing him off appreciatively. I shake my head when he flashes me a cheeky grin, telling me he saw it too.
He slings an arm over my shoulder. “Yeah, the team does this a few times through the season. It brightens up the kids’ days, and the parents love it as well.”
I watch while Seth poses for a photo with a tiny girl with blonde pigtails in a wheelchair hooked up to a breathing tube, and my heart breaks. Her smile is so big it takes over her entire face, and her father looks on with tears in his eyes even while he smiles as well.
“He seems to be managing all the peopling really well,” I comment, and Lincoln squeezes my shoulder.
“He’s good with the kids. It’s the media events he hates, but you’d never know it. And this season he’s been even better. I think you might have had something to do with that. He’s been more outgoing than ever since the trip. You’re good for him,” he says with a smile.
“I don’t know that I can take that much credit. We only knew each other for three weeks.”
“Three weeks on a trip like that is like one real life year, I’ve realised. Don’t discount what you guys had together. I’m sorry for how the truth came out, but I’m glad you’re giving him a chance. Just…” He pauses for a moment, searching for the right words. “Just try not to hurt him.”
I search his face for a moment, admiring the loyalty he has for his friend. “I have no intention of that, Lincoln. I just hope I don’t get my heart broken in the process.”
“I can promise you, if you give him the chance, he will prioritise you above everything else. It’s who he is. He puts the needs of others ahead of himself, sometimes to the detriment of his own happiness. However, our jobs are demanding, requiring frequent travel and dealing with people’s high expectations. It’s a lot for our partners to handle, which is why I prefer casual dating. But Seth is different. He hasn’t dated much because he’s meant for someone who will be his entire world. And I’ve never seen him look at anyone the way he looks at you.”
He heads back towards his teammates, leaving me to ponder his words and wondering if I’m brave enough to meet the expectations behind them .
Two hours later, the bus pulls into the arena car park. Seth has been quiet most of the bus ride back, resting his head back against the top of the chair, weariness written into every line of his face.
“Are you still okay with dropping me home?” I ask.
He rolls his head over to look at me, his eyebrows raised. “Yeah, of course. But I don’t have to take you straight home, if you still want to hang out?”
I take in the hopeful glint in his eye, realising that I’d misread the situation. “I just thought you might be over hanging out with people after so much socialising this morning.”
“That feeling never applies to you,” he replies, and I smile, unable to ignore the butterflies in my stomach when he grins back.
“Okay. What did you have in mind?”
He thinks for a moment, then cocks his head to the side. “Can you skate?”
I shake my head. “Not really a common activity in Australia. I roller-skated a little as a kid, but most of my hobbies involved unfrozen water.”
“Want a lesson from a pro?”
I grin. “An ice skating lesson from the captain of the Calgary Mounties? Lucky me.”
And that’s how I find myself at a local community arena with a professional hockey player strapping rented skates onto my feet. The kid at the skate hire counter had practically vibrated out of his skin when he recognised Seth, and spent ten minutes fanboying over him so hard I thought he’d die of overexertion.
“Does that happen a lot?” I ask, nodding towards where the teenager is snapping a not so covert photo of Seth while he kneels in front of me, yanking the laces tight.
He looks over his shoulder before returning to the task at hand, shrugging. “Yeah. Part of the job. Does it bother you?” He looks up at me, and I can see the apprehension on his face.
“Not if it doesn’t bother you. He’s just a kid. And you were great with all the kids and their parents at the hospital. ”
He finishes with my laces before taking a seat beside me and making quick work of getting his own skates on. “That sort of stuff is fine. But there might be some fan stuff you won’t be so comfortable with. That group of women last night… There’s often quite a few like them around at events that aren’t quite so family friendly.”
“Is that your roundabout way of warning me you have women throwing themselves at you frequently?” I ask while he helps me stand up.
“I just don’t want anything to scare you off,” he replies, keeping me close while he holds my gaze.
“I held my own against Victoria and her little group last night. I’m sure I can handle the rest of them.”
He lets out a breath, his expression a little troubled even while he nods. “Come on, let’s get this lesson started.”
He leads me out onto the ice, turning to face me so that he’s skating backwards while he holds my hands. I eye the other skaters, seeing kids that would be no taller than my knee skating around with ease.
I step out, suddenly feeling nervous. After all my years of surfing, balance isn’t something new to me. But the slippery surface has me gripping Seth’s hands tightly, and I can feel my legs shake.
“Don’t let me fall,” I whisper, and he squeezes my hands back.
“Never.”
I let him tow me around the rink a few times while I slowly work out what to do. Bending my knees slightly, I force myself to glide rather than step, listening to the tips Seth gives me. He’s a good teacher. Once he’s deemed me capable enough, he moves to skate beside me, holding my hand while I stick my other one out to keep my balance.
“So, how long have you been playing hockey?” I ask, finally feeling comfortable enough to have a conversation while remaining upright.
“I actually don’t remember a time when I wasn’t playing hockey. Dad was a huge Vancouver fan, and he played as a kid, so as soon as I was old enough to skate, that was it. I loved every minute of it, and he was so happy when I was drafted. He still comes to as many games as he can, even though I’m playing for the enemy.”
I can hear the joy in his voice, although I’m not game enough to look at him, keeping my eyes trained on the ice in front of me.
“Have you always played for the Mounties?”
“No. My first few years I was in Boston, then I was traded here.” He swings around to skate in front of me again, still only holding one hand.
“Does that happen a lot? Being traded, I mean? Ben mentioned Lincoln was traded from Vancouver last year.”
“It depends, really. I was lucky to have only been traded once in my eight years, but Linc has been traded twice and some of the other guys have been traded four or five times.”
I stumble a little, and he grabs my other hand, keeping me upright.
“Thank you.” I’m grateful when he keeps holding on to both hands. “That must be hard for the ones with families, right? All that moving around?”
He doesn’t answer straight away, and I look up to see him regarding me, his expression thoughtful. “It can be. But that’s the nature of the game. A few of the guys push to be traded back to teams closer to where their partners want to live. But we are a family friendly team, and our current management team works hard to have a support network in place for everyone, including the families of the players. One of my responsibilities as captain is to organise family dinners, stuff like that.”
“That seems like a lot of pressure. Especially when you don’t have a family of your own.”
“It’s actually something I enjoy. I mean, it’s a lot of socialising and I definitely need to spend some time alone afterwards, but seeing the families together… I don’t know, it just makes me smile. ”
We let the conversation move on to other, less heavy things while continuing to do laps around the rink. Little kids zoom by, and we’re stopped occasionally by Mounties fans, but overall, it’s a fun hour.
Once my legs have decided they’ve had enough, we head back to the benches, and Seth helps me pull my skates off. The cold has seeped through my clothes, and I rub my hands together while I wait for him to return my skates.
“How do you feel about hot chocolate?” he asks when he returns to my side.
“Hot chocolate sounds amazing,” I say, shivering a little.
He pulls me up and wraps his arms around me, rubbing his hand up and down my back quickly. “Come on, my little icicle.”
I let him lead me into the little food area, which is far warmer than the rink, and I wait while he orders our drinks. When he returns to my side, he pushes his hands deep into his pockets and shifts his weight from one foot to the other.
“So. Have you had enough of me yet?”
I peer up at him, hiding a smile. “Depends. Will you be feeding me if I say no?”
He hums a little, pulling me into a hug. “I think I could arrange that.”
I rise on to my tiptoes and wrap my arms around his neck. “Well, then, I suppose you’re stuck with me.”
He grins and leans down a little to kiss me. I rise higher, deepening the kiss while he runs his hand through my hair, cupping the back of my head.
“Two hot chocolates for Seth!”
We break apart when the teenager behind the counter calls out Seth’s order, and he moves towards the counter while I smooth my clothes back down, suddenly conscious of our surroundings. I notice a few people looking at me before glancing at Seth, and I swallow hard .
Is this what it’s going to be like every time we go somewhere together in public?
The thought fills me with apprehension.
When Seth turns back to face me with the hot chocolates in hand, I shove my concerns aside and smile, not wanting to give him any reason to worry about me. Because, other people aside, I’ve had a great time with him today, and I’ve remembered now just how easy it is to be with him.