37. You’re The Best Boyfriend
37
YOU’RE THE BEST BOYFRIEND
KYLIE
“How soon can you and Will be ready to go on a two-day skiing trip to Lake Louise?”
Those were not the words I was expecting to hear when I answered the phone to Adele first thing the next morning.
“Um, I mean, I don’t know what we’d need to bring with us, but we could be ready in like two hours, if Seth’s okay to drop me home. Why?” I ask, looking over at where Seth is sleeping beside me.
“We’ve had a few people cancel at the last minute on this trip, so we have some spaces available. Seth could come too, if he wants.”
“It’s just an overnight one?” I run my hand through my hair, trying to pull out the knots.
Seth stirs, opening one eye before raising his head to look at me curiously.
“Yeah, just for the weekend. Seth’s not got any more games this weekend, right? I haven’t checked the game schedule. ”
“No, we were just hanging out with Will this weekend. Have you called him?” I throw back the covers to get dressed.
Seth props himself up on one elbow, watching me with a raised eyebrow.
I cover the phone with my hand. “Wanna come to Lake Louise for skiing this weekend?”
“I can’t ski, remember?”
Right. I’d forgotten about that rule.
I uncover the phone. “Seth can’t ski because of his contract. I don’t want to bail when we had plans for the weekend, but definitely check with Will.”
Seth puts up his hand. “Hey, don’t say no just cause of me.”
“But I don’t want to bail on you. We don’t get to spend that much time together.” I put the phone on speaker so I can pull my shirt over my head, figuring this was a three-way conversation now, anyway.
“I can just come hang out at the hotel, then. I don’t want you guys to miss out on having fun while Will’s here.” Seth sits forward, placing his elbows on his knees awhile he watches me.
“Aw, you’re the best boyfriend, Seth Davidson. Kylie, I will not accept anymore excuses. You guys are coming.”
I stare at the phone. Boyfriend… We still hadn’t used those words out loud. But Seth doesn’t react, so I decide to just pretend it doesn’t have any effect on me.
“Can we at least meet you at the hotel? I don’t want to drag Seth on the bus, and we probably need to get our hands on some snowboarding gear.”
We agree to meet Adele and her group there, and I hang up.
“Are you sure you don’t mind?” I ask, and Seth gets out of bed, pulling me to him and wrapping his arms around me.
“Of course I don’t mind. Will mentioned he’d wanted to go snowboarding anyway, and I can tell you really want to go. Let me just throw some stuff together and we can leave.”
I watch him move around the room, throwing some clothes into his overnight bag, and Lincoln’s words from a few weeks ago run through my mind.
He will prioritise you above everything else. It’s who he is. He puts the needs of others ahead of himself, sometimes to the detriment of his own happiness.
Am I just taking advantage of his easygoing nature? It’s not like I’m forcing him to go, but I’m not telling him to stay either. Because I’m selfish and want him to come along, even though he’ll probably be bored.
Two hours later, we hit the road, heading towards Lake Louise. Will was more than a little excited when we showed up and informed him where we were going, and we’d raced to the shops to grab some snowboarding appropriate clothes.
“So, did you ski much when you were younger? Before you were locked into contracts that banned fun?” I ask, turning in the front passenger seat so I can see both Seth and Will, who is sitting in the middle of the backseat.
Seth laughs. “I skied a bit when I was in my teens. We lived close to a ski hill in BC, so we did it for school. But hockey was pretty much my entire world.”
“We’ve never been. I’m hoping snowboarding is just like surfing,” Will says, leaning forward in his seat.
“I’ve never surfed, but I’m sure there are some similarities,” Seth replies, keeping his eyes on the road.
We spend the rest of the drive making a rough plan for the weekend, and by the time we get to the cute little boutique hotel that the company arranged for the tour, I can feel my excitement brewing. I hadn’t realised how much I’d missed surfing in the time I’ve been here, but now I’m eager to hit the slopes and find out if snowboarding might give me that same feeling.
“Are you sure you’re cool with hanging out here by yourself? I feel bad just running off and leaving you.” I watch while Seth pulls our bags from the back of his car.
He drops them near my feet and pulls me into his arms. “I’ll be fine, babe. Go have fun with your brother. I’m due for some downtime, anyway. I have a book I’ve been wanting to start, and I can go to Banff if I get bored. But I doubt I will. And you can tell me all about how much fun it was when you get back later.” He drops a kiss on the top of my head before releasing me and picking the bags up again.
I still feel bad leaving him, but the urge to slide down a mountain is strong. So I allow Will to pull me onto the bus with the rest of the tour group, telling myself I’ll make it up to Seth later tonight.
It turns out, while there are some similarities in terms of balance, snowboarding is not the same as surfing. Amongst the many differences, the way snowboarders distribute their weight is different, as we discover. As surfers, we’re used to focusing our weight on the back of the board, while snowboarders move to the front. Will and I had some spectacular falls when we did our first couple of runs, but by the end of the morning, we’ve made it down the easiest run a few times without serious injury. While it doesn’t quite fill the surfing void, it is addictive, and I can’t wait to get back out there after we get some lunch.
“So. When are you going to tell me you’ve decided to stay?” Will asks, flopping down in the seat beside me in the food hall of the lodge.
“I’m not.”
“Bullshit. You love it over here. And you’re clearly in love with Seth. What’s stopping you from staying longer?” Will presses, and I shake my head.
“I do love it here, but I have a life back in Brisbane. Seth and I have only been seeing each other for a few months. I can’t upend my life for a relationship that I don’t know will last.” It’s the line I’ve been using on myself every time I consider staying.
Really, I just want Seth to ask me to stay.
Will regards me quietly, a troubled expression on his face. “Since when do you think something like that? You’ve always been the first to jump at new experiences and try new things. What makes you think this relationship wouldn’t last?”
I shrug. “Well, look at your last relationship. We all thought you were on the marriage track, and you guys were together forever.” I try to say it as delicately as possible, but there’s no avoiding the truth.
If a couple as solid as Will and Annelisa were couldn’t make it, I don’t see a relationship with as many hurdles as Seth and mine going the distance. Even though the idea of not having him in my life makes me sick to my stomach, there’s no denying how scary it is to imagine myself giving up my life in Australia for a guy. Even if that guy gets my heart racing just by looking at me.
“Kyles. Come on. Your relationship with Seth is nothing like mine was. For one thing, Seth can’t just disappear on you. Probably one benefit of dating someone famous. And Annelisa and I aside, look at Morgan and Chris. You can’t use my shitty experience as an excuse to run away from what I can see is real between you both.”
“Morgan and Chris are not a good example. They knew from the age of twelve that they’d be together forever.” I let my head fall back and stare at the ceiling, wondering how I can change the subject.
“Jake and Bri, then. Look at the shit they went through before they worked things out. And now they’ve got an awesome life together. Bri found a job she loved that worked in with their lives. You love the tours. I can see that from how you talk about it. You wouldn’t just be staying for Seth, you have other reasons to stay.”
“Can we just… I don’t really want to talk about this anymore? Seth hasn’t even said he wants me to stay. ”
My brother shakes his head. “Fine. But for the record… He wants you to stay.”
We lapse into silence, and I stare out the window, watching people ski and snowboard down the mountain. The good mood I’d been in has disappeared, and now all I can think about is what I’m going to do with my future.
I’m tired of everyone assuming they know what I should do, when the one person I want to tell me what I should do has remained mute on the subject.
With the sun low on the horizon, we manage two more runs before it’s time to head back to the hotel. Stripping off my jacket, I leave Will to his own devices to go in search of Seth. I find him sitting in a high-back chair in front of the fireplace in a little sitting area, resting his feet on a coffee table with his nose buried in a book.
“Hey,” I say, sliding into the space beside him and draping my legs over his lap, before kissing his cheek.
“Hey you. How was it? Did you show them all up?” He puts his book down and wraps his arms around me.
I rest my head on his shoulder. “Not quite. I fell a few times to start with. I’m sure my ass is going to be covered in bruises, but it was so much fun.” I stifle a yawn.
After a day of constant activity, a wave of exhaustion hits me, and I close my eyes.
“How about we get you up to the room and you can have a shower and a rest?” Seth urges me to move.
“No, I’m good here,” I mumble into his chest.
He laughs. “Come on. Do you need me to carry you?” I snuggle in further, wrapping my arms around his neck, and he sighs. “Come on, sleeping beauty.” He slides an arm under my knees and stands in one swift movement .
I shriek, not expecting him to lift me so easily, and cling to him tightly. “Wait! Your book!”
He nods, bending slightly so I can pluck it off the table, and I laugh while he marches off towards our room, acting like it’s no big deal that he’s carrying a grown woman in his arms. Somehow getting our door open with me still in his arms, he places me on the bed, a peculiar look on his face when he stands up.
“What’s wrong?” I ask, swinging my legs over the side of the bed.
“Nothing. Everything’s good.”
He heads into the bathroom and I watch him go, confused, wondering what changed in that few seconds. When he reappears, it’s like nothing happened, but I spend the rest of the evening wondering what that look meant.