4. APRIL
APRIL
I will not cry. I will not cry. He broke up with me in a club on my birthday! I will not cry!
“Ow. Jesus. April. I think you popped a joint.” Josh grimaced.
I paused with my hands dug deeply into Josh’s right knee, which I had been rotating. He sucked in a deep breath, letting me know it was too much. Instantly, I eased off.
“Err. Sorry, Josh.”
“You’re giving me the you’re an asshole special,” he said, rubbing his knee. “I thought you’d be in a better mood after your birthday.”
I winced. The team had known it was my birthday and had gotten me flowers.
When Josh asked what I was doing for the big day, I’d panicked and said Wes was throwing a little thing for me.
Except, Wes didn’t plan a party. He’d barely wanted to do anything.
I’d practically begged him to come out, even for a short while, but I couldn’t bring myself to say that.
So, I fibbed a little to make it seem like he was a decent guy. Joke was on me, right?
“Was it a crappy night?” he trailed off. “I checked your socials, but noticed there was only photos of you and your roomie.”
My socials? Josh checked them? Since when and why? I wracked my brain to recall if anything embarrassing was on them. Somehow, the thought of Josh checking up on me made my heart tick and it was making me nervous.
The memory of my birthday night came in sharp.
Things had happened so fast I hadn’t taken a pic.
Thinking back, I didn’t think there was a single photo of us at all.
Just another reason he was a shitty boyfriend.
But was he even a boyfriend, or was he a glorified fuck friend?
I sighed, thinking about how hard I’d tried to sell it to myself.
Even gloating to my sister and confirming that I was bringing a date to the party.
And now, I was going to have to eat my words.
Tears welled behind my eyelids. Before I could stop myself, I sniffled. Josh perched on his elbows, his torso crunching to show off his ridiculous eight-pack. Like, who had an eight-pack? This guy and, for the record, his ego was just as ridiculous.
Josh squinted at me, studying my face. “What is happening over there?”
Quickly, I fluttered my eyelids in an attempt to stop the tears from falling. “Nothing. Just lotion in my eye.”
“Bullshit. You didn't use lotion this time.”
Damnit. I was too distracted to remember that he liked it when I used the moisturizer and that wasn’t helping.
“Nothing. Sorry about the knee,” I muttered, trying to refocus and shift to his left knee, reminding myself to be careful. He was still nursing a twist from when he stole third base during the last game.
“You gonna spill it or am I gonna get the rest of the crew in here?”
I waved him off. “Let it go.”
He sat up and swung his legs over the table. “Hey, Kev!”
I slammed my hand over his mouth so fast, I knocked him backward.
“Ow!” he mumbled through my fingers.
“Alright, alright. Stop. I don't need a public broadcast,” I said, releasing my hand from his mouth. He must’ve sensed my unease, because Josh waved his hand to encourage me to share my story. “We broke up.”
His mouth gaped, eyes wide. “What? When?”
Embarrassment clawed up my throat. It was hard enough saying it to myself, let alone anyone else. “This weekend.”
“On your birthday?” he asked incredulously. “Who did it?”
“What?”
“The breaking up. You or him?”
“What does it matter?”
“It matters. If it was you, then good on you for not taking his pompous shit, but I suspect by the reddening of your eyes and the flushing of your face, he broke it off.”
I swallowed a thick lump in my throat. Pompous shit? Josh wasn’t holding back. Since when did he even notice my love life?
A flash of anger swept through his eyes. “Piece of shit.”
“It’s not your fault,” he added.
I shrugged, trying to downplay it.
“Yeah, but no matter what, no one deserves that.”
“Thanks,” I mumbled, surprised by the genuineness in his tone. Josh had a reputation of being an ass. He was thoughtless, arrogant, and ruthless. I had seen his ego get in the way many times on the field, nearly getting his ass tossed out of the game if it wasn’t for Kev and Jake calming him down.
“My turn. Don’t be greedy.” Kev came bursting into the room, not giving a crap that I was still in session.
He was still damp from the shower and water beaded down his toned physique.
At least he had on his Twisters gym shorts, unlike the last time.
He’d arrived in only a towel. I kept telling them that therapy was clothing on.
“She likes me more.” Josh smirked at him.
“I do not,” I quickly interjected, avoiding getting in between whatever little showdown those two were about to have. “Keep me out of this.”
Kev chuckled. Josh scoffed, gathered up his bag, and glanced at me; his eyes telling me it was going to be fine.
I wasn’t even sure why, but I sort of believed him.
That was the thing with Josh. Despite being a giant ass, he was also surprisingly comforting.
I lowered my stare to the ground to hide my watery eyes, grateful we didn’t always need words to communicate.
Kev jumped up on the massage table and laid on his back with his head staring up at the sky. “Don’t worry about him.”
I nearly stepped around him. “Excuse me?”
“Josh is an ass all the time. Whatever he said to make you have the puppy-dog look, just ignore it or slip some hot and icy in his lotion and rub it all over his ass next game.”
I snorted so hard that I sounded like Mrs. Piggy. “He’d probably like that.”
“No doubt,” Kev chuckled, threw on his headphones, and closed his eyes while I moved him into position.
The entire time I stretched out Kev, my thoughts were stuck on the conversation with Josh.
He genuinely seemed irritated that Wes broke up with me.
Maybe it was a circumstance of timing, but either way, there was sincerity in his voice about being better off.
He was right. Screw Wes. I’d rather jump back on the single train than deal with him again.
Except, what was I going to do about needing a date?
The thought of facing my sister and her self-righteousness was a tough pill to swallow. She had doubted I’d be bringing anyone and instead of letting it go, I’d doubled down. Ugh, what a freaking mess. By the time Kev’s thirty minutes were up, I had given myself a headache.
“I don’t know what happened, but that was the best damn stretch of my life.” Kev grinned, stretching his neck as he sat up.
“Turmoil does wonders for the stretches. Got it.” We both chuckled as I stepped out of the room, giving him some privacy to cover up.
Nora filled my glass to the brim with chardonnay and I watched her do something fancy with the chicken breast she was stuffing with asparagus, feta, and tomatoes.
I was lost in thought, contemplating what to do about being single and expected to show off my wonderful boyfriend on my Papi’s birthday.
“What am I going to do?” I whined. Nora glared at me while wrapping the chicken.
“You’re better off without Wes,” she declared, then I recognized the dangerous sparkle in her eyes. “I know what you can do!”
I was hesitant to engage, but the wine helped with my courage. “I don’t know how I feel about—”
“Fake dating!” Nora shrieked, clearly excited about the idea that I thought was ridiculous.
“Excuse me?” I sputtered on my wine.
“You work with a roster of hot guys. Isn't there one you can borrow as a playboy toy for a few hours?”
I shook my head. “Absolutely not.”
“Oh, come on. It’s not like you need to date him for real. Just a few pics, a dinner out, and for him to act like a doting boyfriend.” Seeing my blank expression she rushed out, “It’s just one night.”
“I need more wine,” I grumbled, sloshing more into my glass. “I can’t ask them. It’s too personal and then everyone will know I can’t keep a boyfriend.”
“Your sister won’t know anything.” Nora read my mind. “And even if she does, it doesn’t matter because he’s just a rental.”
“I can’t mix business and pleasure. I don’t need these guys knowing my personal shit.”
“That’s valid.” Nora finished the chicken and pushed it into the oven. She tapped the counter in thought before turning to face me. “What about someone you’re close with?”
My head ran down the roster of the Twisters.
Most of the team already held various relationship statuses from seriously dating to married, including Carlos and Jake.
Jake probably would have been my first choice if he wasn’t.
He was just a genuinely nice guy, not to mention handsome in a classic way.
My brain then filtered through the singles; there was only a handful.
Milos might do it. He had this Eastern European air about him, dark and dangerous, also a notorious playboy, worse than most others on the team.
I’d heard he was very into threesomes. Probably not the best choice.
Eddie had an on-and-off situation, not quite sure where he was with that these days.
Kev was probably dating at least three women right now. And then there was Josh.
Sure, he was hot. He’d started growing out his hair.
It was now a wavy shag that highlighted the chestnut brown color, and with his deep amber eyes, it was something entirely too appealing.
I could feel my face flush just thinking of him.
Not gonna happen. Again, I thought, shaking my head to rattle free the images of him under the twinkling lights of the fair.
“I’m not close with any of them.”
She shot me a suspicious glance. “What about Josh?”
There it was. I shook my head. “I should never have told you about him.”
Nora grinned. “Yeah, but you did. Come on, April! He’d probably love to help you out. And, honestly, him on your arm for a night? It would shut everyone up!”
“There isn’t a chance I’m asking him.” I stuck my face in my glass and grumbled, “I’d rather ask Wes.” I guess I wasn’t as quiet as I thought when her eyes narrowed at me.
“Don’t even think about it.” With the sharp knife dangling in her hand as she said it, she was a little terrifying.
“I won’t.” I raised my hands in surrender.
“Fine, what about the sweet one? Kev.”
Sweet one? Yeah, right. If she only knew.
Doubt dug in the pit of my stomach. “I’m not sure any of them will say yes.”
“Someone will.” Nora grabbed some veggies from the fridge and started prepping a salad.
“Guys love to do that chivalrous shit. Even if they act like big dicks. And the best part is, it’s all pretend, so there won’t be real feelings that have us eating our weight in ice cream in a few weeks’ time.
” She side-eyed the recycling bins with two empty cartons of Moose Tracks sticking out.
“I’d rather not involve the people I work with.” I blew out a frustrated breath.
She stopped chopping and swirled the knife in the air. “What about a stranger?”
“Like what, a want ad? Date needed, no strings? I swear that was a movie once.”
Her eyebrows knitted together as she tried to recall the name of it. “It was, but yeah, something like that? I’ll help you make an online profile!”
I paused mid-sip, staring at her in disbelief. I couldn’t put myself out there like that. Could I?
“Just promise me,” she continued, “that you’ll ask one of the Twisters if this doesn’t work out.”
Mulling over the idea, it wasn’t so bad. Maybe there was at least one guy? What the hell was in this wine? Was I going to consider asking one of them? I mean, I was already pretty shameless after the last time I tried, and that didn’t go as planned.
Nora poured more wine, and I busted open my laptop to update my sad Love Life profile. I hadn’t ever had success on the site, but after reviewing my stats, I understood why. The picture was awful, but the blurb was worse. I was one cliché away from being a lonely cat lady. With no cat.
“First thing, change the profile pic,” Nora directed.
“Agreed.” I filtered through some of my pics of me at baseball. None of those fit the bill. Then I found some of Nora and I out drinking, a few taken by my ex. He had the worst picture taking skills.
“What about this one?” Nora opened one of the boudoir photos I’d gathered enough courage to do when I first got back on the dating scene two years ago.
I had just joined the team. I’d taken one of my jerseys, cropped it, and paired it with my tiny, red booty shorts.
I paired that with cowboy boots and positioned myself so I was lying in bed with the game on.
I was trying hard for the baseball-inspired Daisy Duke phase.
Jesus, I’d needed someone to talk me out of that.
Glaring at the picture, the one good thing was that I hid my face.
“No.”
“Oh, come on. You look fucking prime!”
“It was meant to be a private gift.”
Not that it had worked out. He’d decided to open it in front of his mother, despite my pleas not to. Things ended pretty quickly after that, as his mother thought I was corrupting her son. I hadn’t realized just how much of a mama’s boy he was until then.
“Now, it’s a gift to yourself, because you’ll land a hot guy who can’t resist this.” She motioned her hand over me.
We had scrolled through some other sporty girls’ pics and there was a fair amount of sexy pics like mine. Hockey, baseball, and basketball were the top ones, and jerseys seemed to be the next biggest thing besides the almost-nudes.
“Fine, but crop it a bit more so nothing can be given away!” I caved, because if I didn’t, she would’ve probably stripped me down and made me wear something worse.
“Yes!” she cheered, hitting the upload button before I could change my mind.
“Should I pick a new name?”
“Fuck, yeah. How about…” Nora paused, typing a bunch of things on the keyboard. “Summer Loving? A play on your last name and the flirty vibes of the pic.”
It wasn’t bad. Better than the others we came up with. As I glanced one more time at the photo, doubt crossed my mind. “What if someone from the team recognizes me?”
Nora scoffed, “I doubt any of the guys are using Love Life? I’m sure they troll the groupie sites instead.”
Fair point. I had heard enough locker-room talk to confirm very few of the single guys were searching for meaningful relationships, let alone being online.
For one, they didn’t trust anyone. But they were more than willing to hook up, which was why I was getting slightly more comfortable with the idea.
We finished the profile, adding more casual flirty stuff instead of the typical long walks on the beach, reading under the covers, and enjoys a good night out with friends or tucked in for snuggle time.
Ugh, no wonder I only had super creepy comments before.
With any luck, I only had to talk to a couple of guys and vet whether or not I could bribe them into being my fake boyfriend.
Because there was no way I was going to ask any of the Twisters.