Chapter Thirty
Maisy hadn’t slept well since her last confrontation with Chase.
She simply tossed and turned for hours before exhaustion set in.
Every time she closed her eyes, all she could see was Chase.
She missed their nightly conversations, the updates on his small acts of kindness, his details about working to gain Guy’s trust. When she did manage to fall asleep, she was restless and woke after only an hour or two.
Neither her heart nor her head seemed willing to let go of him, despite her continual efforts.
Again and again, her mind reviewed their last conversation. How ill-tempered he’d been. She knew he regretted the things he said, and yet every word was the truth.
Because the sale of Gallagher Jewels included all the remaining inventory, the store had closed until the new owners took possession.
Maisy knew she should be on a job search, but she didn’t have the heart for it.
Not yet. In a few weeks she’d be returning to school, thanks to the provision Chase had provided.
It would have been far more honest to own up to what he’d done rather than hide behind some fake scholarship.
It was how he’d helped Laura, so it shouldn’t have come as any surprise for him to finagle one for her.
It was ridiculous to believe Maisy wouldn’t see through his ploy.
At first, she’d considered refusing it, which would have been stupid on her part.
She couldn’t let pride take away this amazing opportunity.
Becoming a nurse had been her dream from the time she’d been a young girl.
She would always be grateful to Chase for giving her the means to make that dream a reality.
Her one wish was that he’d been honest about what he’d done.
After yet another sleepless night, Maisy wandered down the stairs to find her mother busy in the kitchen. She eyed Maisy sympathetically. All the worry about Sean’s truck, the store, and Gram’s medical bills had been resolved, thanks to Chase. Her mother looked far more relaxed these days.
His generosity showed how deeply he cared, which enhanced the pain of their separation.
His intentions were good. What he didn’t understand were the consequences of what he’d done, how it changed the very fabric of their relationship—plus, it forced her to own up to several factors that made a relationship impossible.
Distance and family being major concerns. Her family needed her.
More good news had followed. Recently, her mother had been offered a full-time teaching position with the Seattle school district as a fifth-grade teacher. Full-time employment would start in August.
Sean had everything required to continue with the apprenticeship program, and Patrick was the star hitter for his Little League team. It felt as if the dark thundercloud that had hung over their heads for weeks had moved on and bright sunlight shone down on them.
With her eyes burning from lack of sleep, Maisy poured herself a cup of coffee and sank onto a chair at the kitchen table.
Her mother joined her. “Another sleepless night?”
Maisy sipped her coffee, then nodded.
“Are you sure you made the right decision? You know better than anyone that the reason Chase intervened is because he deeply cares for you…for all of us.”
“I know he does. It’s more than that, Mom.
His life is in Chicago. Everything and everyone who is important to me is here.
Long-distance relationships are problematic.
His career is all-consuming. I have my own sets of dreams and goals.
Consequently, we’ll both be torn and neither of us happy.
” Maisy didn’t mention the differences in their financial and social standings.
It was understood she would never fit into his world, or he into hers.
Her mother slowly absorbed Maisy’s words. “Only God knows what would have happened to us if Chase hadn’t stepped in when he did,” her mother continued.
Maisy didn’t disagree. Chase had lifted the burden that had nearly crippled them with fear of the future.
“You realize,” her mother continued, “it couldn’t have been an easy decision on his part, especially when he promised he wouldn’t help.”
Tears leaked into Maisy’s eyes; she blinked rapidly, refusing to let them fall. “It’s for the best,” she insisted, convinced that if she said it often enough, she’d come to accept it as the truth, which it was.
“He loves you, Maisy.”
“I know, but it’s for the best for us both. It’s difficult now; in time he’ll accept I was right to end it when I did.”
“What’s going on here?” Sean asked as he made his way to the coffeepot.
Mom had Sean’s lunch packed, and he grabbed it, along with the filled thermos. He paused in front of the table where Maisy sat and waited for her to answer.
“We’re discussing Chase.”
Sean’s gaze moved to Maisy.
“Go ahead and say it,” she muttered, knowing that if he wasn’t voicing it aloud, he was thinking it.
“Say what?”
“I told you so,” she returned.
“I did tell you,” Sean said, “but knowing I was right doesn’t give me any pleasure. Chase Furst isn’t the man for you.”
“I disagree,” their mother inserted. “Maisy loves him, and this decision has broken her heart. And Chase loves her, too. Anyone with eyes could see how deeply he cares for Maisy.”
“Maybe,” Maisy reluctantly agreed.
Sean was silent for a long moment. He started out of the kitchen, but then turned back.
“I never thought I’d say this, but Mom could be right.
When you first met Chase, I had plenty of doubts, and with good reason, but I can’t fault him.
I know you’re brokenhearted, and I’m sorry.
You might reconsider, Maisy. He’s a good guy.
I never thought I’d say this, but he’s sort of grown on me. ”
He continued out of the kitchen and said, before he disappeared into the hallway, “I won’t be home for dinner tonight. Katie invited me over. She’s cooking.”
Maisy and her mother shared a smile. Sean was seldom home for dinner these days, as he spent more and more time with Katie.
The two had become close, often spending evenings together.
This was different from any of the other relationships Sean had had in the past. The family had never met any of the other women Sean had dated.
From the simple way his eyes brightened when he said Katie’s name, Maisy knew this girl was special.
Within the next hour, Mom and Patrick left for school, and Maisy was alone in the house.
She spent the morning taking over the chores that generally fell on their mother.
She got the spaghetti sauce going in the slow cooker, did two loads of laundry, shopped for groceries, and vacuumed the entire house.
She was putting the vacuum away in the hall closet when the doorbell rang. She headed to the front door and opened it to find Chase standing on the other side of the screen.
Her breath caught in her throat, and for an instant it felt as if her heart was about to explode. Too stunned to react, she stood as still as the Washington Monument at the unexpectedness of seeing him.
“I know I should have let you know I was coming,” he said, “but I was afraid if I did you wouldn’t agree to see me.”
Maisy’s mouth had gone completely dry, making speech impossible.
“I didn’t come to change your mind about us, although I desperately hope you will. I came to apologize for the things I said before. I love you, Maisy, and I thank God you came into my life, if for no other reason than the life lessons you taught me.”
She taught him life lessons?
“Before I met you,” he continued, “I was completely self-absorbed. The entire world revolved around me and what I dictated. I didn’t know the doorman’s name at my condo until I met you.
Guy was nothing more than some faceless bum, as far as I was concerned.
That’s an example of two of the small changes in me since meeting you.
“If it hadn’t been for you, I’d never have learned my mother had found sobriety and made something positive of her life. How I wish I’d been forgiving enough to read her letters. I would give most anything to turn back time. What little I have of her now, I owe solely to you.”
Maisy smiled, remembering her surprise to discover Chase’s mother had been nothing like the way he’d described her.
“You’re the most real person I’ve ever known,” Chase said.
“There’s nothing fake about you or anyone in your family, even Sean.
You showed me what it was like to be part of a family.
I deeply admire the way you all came together to support one another after your father’s death.
I saw your willingness to sacrifice, and to make the best of a tragic situation.
I saw what it meant to belong, to pull together for the good of others, to be willing to do whatever it took to keep together.
For all that, I will forever be grateful. ”
It was impossible to keep the tears at bay any longer. They rolled unrestrained down her face. “You saved us.” Her voice was barely above a whisper.
“I didn’t do it,” he insisted. “My intuition was right; my father was the one responsible.”
Maisy didn’t know what to believe any longer. If his father had been responsible, it was because Chase had shared their situation. It wasn’t beyond belief that he’d asked his father to step in. Not that it mattered now. What was done was done.
“I love you, Maisy.”
She drank in his words and tightened her resolve. It would be far too easy to give in.
“I love you, too, Chase, and I wish with all my heart that it could have worked out between us,” she said, as she gathered her thoughts.
“It isn’t only the difference in our financial situation or that you helped my family, it’s everything else.
The inequities in our relationship are too much to overcome.
It might feel like the deep feelings we share would be enough, and for a while they might be, but it would never last.” Ever since they’d split, Maisy had worked hard to convince herself this was the right decision.
Painful as it was, she felt the right thing to do for them both was to end it before it hurt even worse.
“Sean said it from the start,” she continued. “I don’t mix well in your world. I’m never going to be comfortable as a member of the Junior League or fit with the members of your country club.”
“Do you seriously believe I care about any of that?”
“But you should. You need a wife who is your equal, one who is readily accepted into your social circle. A wife you’d be proud to introduce to your friends.”
Chase closed his eyes, as if he found it hard to swallow her words.
“Don’t misunderstand me, I have my own strengths, but unfortunately they aren’t suitable for the type of wife you need.”
“You’re wrong, Maisy, so wrong. You’re everything I’d ever hoped to find in a woman, a wife.”
Maisy closed her eyes, fighting down the desire to throw herself into his arms and accept his love. She desperately wanted to believe it would work for them. The valley between them was too wide and too deep, and she feared that in time he would have regrets.
“As much as I wanted this, I can’t see it happening. Please, Chase, don’t make this more difficult than it already is.”
He frowned and his face tightened. “You’ve made up your mind, then?”
She nodded.
“And nothing I say is going to change your decision?”
Again, she nodded.
“I’d give just about anything to be a poor man, if it meant you’d be willing to marry me.”
Maisy’s smile was filled with sadness. “We both know that’s impossible. You are who you are, Chase. You can’t change yourself for me any more than I can change for you.”
“Perhaps you’re right,” he said. “I tried, Maisy. I hoped…” He hesitated and released a pent-up breath.
“It doesn’t matter what I hoped. It’s clear you’ve made up your mind.
I came to apologize, and I’ve done that.
I won’t be back or bother you again.” He turned away and walked down the steps to the street, where his rental car was parked.
Maisy watched him go. She placed her hand over her heart for fear it would follow Chase and plead with him to come back.
Instead of driving back to the airport, where the company plane waited, Chase found himself wandering aimlessly around Seattle while he dealt with his frustration.
He wanted to argue with Maisy. He could easily debate everything she’d believed made their relationship impossible.
She didn’t see herself as fitting into his world, which was almost laughable.
Little did she understand, she was his world.
He couldn’t care less about his status with the country club or anything else.
None of what he’d once considered important would matter if Maisy was in his life.
He needed her to keep him grounded, to save him from falling victim to his own self-importance.
Her warmth had thawed his heart, and because of her, he’d never be the same.
Hardly realizing where he was, Chase ended up at the cemetery where his mother was buried.
He parked and walked the grounds until he found Michelle’s grave marker.
Although he’d flown into Seattle several times recently, he’d never made the effort.
If he were to analyze why, he might recognize how guilty he felt to have refused her every attempt to connect. Guilt. Regret. Confusion.
Kneeling down at her grave site, Chase brushed away a few bits of grass and then ran his finger over her name. Remorse tumbled through his mind at the speed of light. He ached for what might have been. And now, like with Maisy, it was too late.
He pressed his hand over the grave marker. His father had mentioned Michelle’s deep desire for a family. It came to him that he wasn’t all that different from his mother. He deeply loved Maisy and her extended family, and had hoped one day to be part of it, but it looked like that was not to be.
His heart linked with his mother’s.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
A breeze whispered through the trees. It might have been wishful thinking on his part, but he felt that Michelle had heard him and granted forgiveness.