Chapter Twenty-Two
Twenty-two
Lane
I glance around the book store, making sure nobody is close enough to overhear. “Do you think it’s weird that Jameson and I haven’t talked about what happens between us when he leaves?” I ask Kam as I help her put a new shipment of books away.
Classical music plays softly in the background, and incense, something rich and warm, burns on the counter, adding to the already calming atmosphere.
“It’s been a month, so yes, it’s definitely weird. But you are also a flight risk, so he’s probably afraid to bring it up,” she shrugs, placing a stack of books neatly on a display table. “Why haven’t you brought it up? I thought things were going great?”
I bite my lip. “Lingering fears, I guess. Everything just feels too good to be true. What if he has a wife and kids he’s going back home to?”
She rolls her eyes. Her back is to me, but I still feel it. “Seriously, Lane. That man is head over heels coo-coo bananas for you. Plus, he has literally killed for you. He’s probably just too afraid of spooking you to bring it up. Use your big girl words and talk to him.”
My eyes dart around nervously. “We still don’t know for sure he did it,” I remind her.
Technically, that’s true. He asked if it would change how I felt about him. He never actually came out and said he did it.
She turns, hands finding her hips as she gives me an expectant stare.
I roll my eyes, placing another book on the shelf. “Do you ever get tired of being right?”
“Nope.” Her lips pull up in a cocky grin. “So now that that’s out of the way, I have a very important question that I’m dying to know.”
I eye her cautiously. “What?”
With Kam, it could be anything from ‘Do you want to go out to dinner tomorrow?’ to ‘Do you want to run naked across Mr. Smith’s field?’
Something we definitely didn’t do after too many shots of tequila and a very rowdy game of truth or dare.
“Is he big everywhere?” Kam asks, wiggling her eyebrows.
A laugh bursts from my lips. “Very.”
She holds out her hands, palms facing each other. “Just nod your head when I should stop,” she says, slowly moving her palms further apart until I nod.
Sorry, guys, but women do talk about dick size.
Kam’s eyes move back and forth between her hands, widening with disbelief. “You lucky bitch.”
I give her a sly grin and a wink “And it’s pierced.”
“It’s official. You are the luckiest fucking bitch on the planet,” she sighs dramatically. “Do you think he has any friends who are also perfect?” She perks up, adding. “The pierced dick isn’t mandatory but is a plus.”
I chuckle, shaking my head, no longer surprised by the ridiculous things that come out of her mouth. Kam literally says whatever she wants.
“How is the bookstore doing?” I ask, directing the conversation away from myself.
I run my fingers over the green and gold cover of the book Kam showed me weeks ago. It’s no surprise she had to order another box. That book was amazing, though I’m now counting the days until the next one comes out, which isn’t soon enough.
She smiles, looking around her store with her hands on her hips. “It’s doing really great. Better than I expected in such a small town.” She laughs. “Who knew all these old ladies and housewives were so into dirty books?”
Kam opened the bookstore three years ago, all on her own. She and her parents don’t have the greatest relationship. She comes from money, like me, and they want her to get married. Preferably to someone of their choosing. That’s not what Kam wants. She wants to wait until she finds ‘the one’.
Slipping the last book onto the shelf, I nudge the box away with my foot, the rough cardboard scraping softly against the hardwood. “Have any of the authors you emailed gotten back to you about signings yet?”
She nods, her bright blue eyes lighting with excitement. “Yeah, a few of the indie authors have gotten back to me and have booked signings for later this year and early next year.”
“That’s amazing.”
She cocks her head to the side. “So now that I’ve let you successfully distract me for a while…are you going to talk to Jameson?”
I groan. “Yes. I’ll talk to him tonight when he comes over.”
“Aww look at my best friend, she’s growing up so fast,” she teases, wiping a fake tear from her cheek.
“I’m leaving.” I grab my purse off the counter and head for the door.
“Love you!” She yells.
“Love you more!” I yell back as I slip out the door, the bell ringing as I open and close the door.
I run a hand down the front of my flowy, black maxi dress. Checking myself in my mirror for what feels like the hundredth time.
Why am I so nervous?
Jameson isn’t the kind of guy to start a relationship that he doesn’t see going anywhere. Are we in a relationship? Boyfriend and girlfriend? We haven’t had that conversation either.
Damn it. Get it together, Lane. It’s just a conversation. One, he was probably waiting for me to start. I can trust Jameson.
A knock on the door pulls me from my thoughts. My eyes roam over my reflection once more. I curled my hair the way he told me he likes and put on his favorite red lipstick.
I’m not at all surprised to see the beautiful bouquet of wildflowers in front of me when I pull the door open. “At this point, I think you are keeping the flower shop in business.” I laugh, taking the offered flowers.
“You look beautiful.” He gives me a quick kiss on the lips, careful not to ruin my lipstick.
No, he will take pleasure in doing that later with his cock. Another of his favorites.
I lead him into the kitchen, the smell of garlic and herbs filling the air.
He takes a vase from the cabinet and fills it with water. “Chicken Alfredo?"
I watch him as he moves around my kitchen, making himself at home. Can’t say that I hate it.
I nod, handing him the flowers. “It’s one of the few meals I can make that doesn’t come frozen.”
He gives me that grin that makes me want to rip his clothes off like a sex crazed lunatic. “Lucky for you, I’m an excellent cook.”
He comes around the island and pulls me into his arms, kissing me again.
“Dinner smells delicious, baby.” He grabs my hand, guiding me to the table, with that easy confidence of his. The chair legs scrape against the tile as he pulls it out, waiting until I’m seated to take his own across from me.
I stare at him for a moment, admiring his beauty. His rough, tattooed, very large exterior does not at all match his soft and tender insides. He gives both the golden retriever and touch her and die, literally, vibes at the same time. Yet it somehow works for him.
Kam’s right, I need to just talk to him. Nothing to be afraid of.
Jameson’s eyes hold mine as he dishes pasta onto a plate. “What’s on your mind, Lane?” His ability to read me so easily should unsettle me but it doesn’t.
I take the dish of pasta from his hands, setting it in front of me, with a soft thud. “Why haven’t we talked about what happens after your job here is done?” I ask, biting my bottom lip, my nerves coming back full force now that it’s out of my mouth.
He pauses, setting his half filled plate in front of him, and rests his forearms on the table, giving me his full attention. “Why do you think we haven’t talked about it?”
I sigh. “Because you were waiting for me to get there.” Damn it. Why the hell does Kam always have to be right? And why the hell is Jameson so damn perfect?
He nods, and picks up his plate, dumping more pasta on top. “I’ll be here for at least two more months. I’m still figuring out the rest, but I will figure it out. This is real for me, Lane.” He holds my eyes, making damn sure I see the promise in them.
The knot in my stomach loosens. “It’s real for me too.”
The rest of dinner is filled with laughter and flirtatious smiles.
We go back and forth asking each other questions about our childhood and our plans for the future.
I’m as honest as I can be while still protecting myself.
I still hate that I’m lying to him, but I’ve come to accept that it’s a necessary evil.
I became Lane to find happiness, and I refuse to let Ceciley’s life ruin it.