CHAPTER TWELVE OPAL
CHAPTER TWELVE
OPAL
I sip the tea he made me, and nibble on the grape Uncrustable he left on the tray. The movie plays on the TV—Twilight, his choice—but one of my comfort movies.
Is he thinking of me? Why am I acting like this? I set down my phone and focus on the movie.
Just then my phone buzzes.
It’s him.
Goodnight, baby doll.
My throat tightens as I grip the phone. Tears sting my eyes. I push them away biting down hard on my lip.
God, what’s happening to me?
I’m falling in love with a man who’s face I’ve never known. A man I couldn’t even pick out in a crowd. I don’t even know his real voice.
But I know his touch—the soft, the rough. I know he’s kind and caring. He’s protective and nurturing. I know the way he makes me feel—seen and wanted.
I reread his message until the words blur. Goodnight, baby doll.
This cant go on.
As much as I crave him, as much as he fulfills every twisted, secret fantasy I’ve ever had. I can’t build a life on shadows and secrets. The sex is unbelievable—God its everything I’ve ever dreamed of and more.
But I’m not built for friends-with-benefits type situations. I need more than stolen nights and anonymous fucking.
No matter how badly my body begs for him. No matter how desperate I am for his hands on me, my heart screams for more.
If he can’t be with me, then I can’t keep doing this.
Even if it breaks me.
The little bell over the shop door jingles as a customer leaves, and I slump against the counter, tugging at the hem of my cardigan. I haven’t texted Flynn back since he texted me last time we were together.
Despite my silence, every morning I wake to a pumpkin spice latte and a pumpkin cream cheese muffin at my door.
Alex slides over, eyes full of nosy mischief. “So..” she drawls, folding her arms. “How are things with sexy masked man?”
Heat rushes to my cheeks. I glance around the bookstore—thankfully empty for the moment.
“… it has been incredible. Like the best sex of my life. And also…” my voice lowers to a whisper. “I can’t keep seeing him.”
Alex’s jaw drops. “What? You finally get some mind-blowing sex, and your first thought is to drop him?”
“I don’t know who he really is, Alex. I don’t even know how old he is. And yeah, the sex is amazing, but I can’t just settle… for a man with secrets.”
She rolls her eyes dramatically, grabbing a stack of books and thumping them onto the counter. “Listen anonymous sex is much better than no sex. And from the way you’re blushing? I’d say it was some goooood sex.”
I cover my face with both hands, groaning. “That’s not the point.”
“It should be.” Alex smirks. “If I were you, I’d keep him around, at least until you find a replacement…”
Her eyes flick up. “Oh…and it looks like that replacement might be walking in right now.” She pats me on the butt and disappears down an aisle.
“What—”
The bell dings and I whip my head toward the door.
“Kellan. Hey.” I say with a shaky breath.
Tall, broad, Kellan. He’s in his work jacket and his usual attire. He flashes me a smile and lifts a hand in a little wave before heading straight to the romance aisle.
I watch him disappear down the row. When he returns, his big hand grips a familiar cover. My stomach flips.
Her Soul is Mine.
Kade Cross.
I force myself to breathe evenly as he sets the book on the counter. My fingers tremble slightly as I scan it, the soft beep sounding far too loud in the quiet shop.
“That’ll be $16.72,” I manage.
He slips a card from his wallet, sliding it across the counter. His gaze lingers on me.
As the receipt prints, I tilt my head. “Kellan, you shop here a lot… you should be enrolled in the rewards program.”
He blinks. “Oh… okay, let’s do it.” A blush creeps up his cheeks. “The rewards program I mean, sign me up.”
My lips curve as I slide the form across the counter. His big hand takes the pen, his fingers brushing mine for the briefest moment.
He finishes the form, sliding it back across the counter. “Thanks,” he says with a small smile before heading toward the door.
I exhale ready for the moment to pass when his boots scuff against the floor. He stops. Turns. And walks back to me.
My pulse jumps.
He runs a hand through his short sandy brown hair. “Opal…” his voice wavers, just a little before he clears his throat and straightens his shoulders. “Do you—” he pauses, steadying himself, “—want to go out sometime? For coffee?”
I just stare, stunned.
“You know, Kellan… I think that’d be fun.” A smile stretches across my face. “Yeah, lets do it… get coffee I mean.”
Relief washes across his face, followed by a grin. “Okay. How about Saturday morning? At the toasted bean. Eight a.m.?”
I nod, biting back my own grin. “Sure.”
“Good.” He lingers, like he can’t believe I said yes. Then he turns and heads toward the door, the bell chiming behind him.
Alex emerges from between the stacks; a wicked smile plastered across her face.
“What?” I demand, my cheeks heating.
“You know what,” she says, lifting her brows.
I laugh, covering my face with my hands. “God, Alex…” but then reality slams into me. “Shit—I have to open the store Saturday.”
Alex waves me off. “Please. I got you. Just come in when I’m scheduled. Ten.”
I lower my hands, grinning. “You’re the best.”
“I know.” She smirks and leans against the counter. “You know I wonder what the sex is like with him.”
I choke on my breath. “Alex!”
“What? I bet its mediocre. The big hot ones are always…vanilla.”
My draw drops. And my thoughts drift to the masked sex machine. He’s big, I’m not sure if he’s hot but… I don’t even care. Anything is better than my ex. Grinding on the floor would be more pleasurable than the sex I had with him.
“Anyway,” Alex says, tossing her red hair over her shoulder. “You ready to go?”
I nod, grabbing my bag. “Yup.”
“You know, you gotta talk to shadow daddy. Just one last time. Tell him why, don’t just ghost him.” Alex says, from the driver seat.
“Alex, he doesn’t tell me anything.”
“I’m just saying, think about it.”
I’m sprawled across my bed, cats on my lap, binge watching another cheesy thriller, the glow of the TV flickering across my room. Hours have passed—I’ve lost track of time.
I push myself up and grab my water bottle, padding quietly to the kitchen. My eyes catch the tall mirror leaning against the wall, and for a split second, I freeze.
Is that?
A shadowed figure, broad and looming, right behind me in the reflection. My heart stops. I spin around. Empty room.
I swallow hard, my pulse hammering in my ears.
What is wrong with me?
I shake my head, trying to laugh off the chill running down my legs. Of course he’s not here. I’m just imagining him. I’m just so desperate for him my brain is fabricating his image.
How sick and twisted is it that I wish he were. That I secretly wish he were looming in the shadows of my apartment. Desperate to get glances of me. Desperate to be near me. I bite my lip thinking about it. There’s something seriously wrong with me.
The wind is biting at my cheeks; it’s getting colder every day now. Winter is approaching, soon my evening walks will have to stop. It’s darker than I realized. I should head home.
As I stride through the darkness, a prickle hits the back of my neck. The feeling of someone watching me.
I glance over my shoulder. A black truck is rolling along the street, it’s lights dim, trailing right behind me. My pulse spikes.
I fumble for my phone, unlocking the screen. A text flashes across the top.
Better run, baby doll.
Flynn.
I bite my lip, a giggle escaping me before my legs move, shoving me into a sprint.
My breaths tear through me, ragged, as the truck keeps its slow, steady crawl behind me.
My arms pump, legs burning. Faster. A maddening ache grows with each pounding step.
God, what is wrong with me?
My apartment building is just ahead, salvation in brick and glass. I push harder, lungs on fire, heart thundering, and a persistent throbbing between my legs.
The truck parks haphazardly in the front spot. The masked stranger exits it and breaks out into a sprint after me.
A wild thrill washes over me like nothing I have ever experienced. This is sick. I am sick.
I hit the stairs, half-stumbling as I climb—
And then strong gloved hands clamp around my waist. A sharp moan catches my throat, muffled instantly by a gloved palm.
“Caught you,” a low raspy growl rumbles in my ear.
Adrenaline and arousal crashes through me in a dizzying wave. My legs tremble. My lips part against his hand in a muffled moan.
He bends me farther over the steps. His hands grip the band of my leggings and yanks them down, ripping my panties in the process.
And—I jolt awake. Sweat clinging my brow, breaths hard and sharp. My heart thrashes against my ribs as I clutch the sheets entangled around my legs.
My room is still, silent, shadows stretching across the walls.
I drag a shaky hand over my face.
Holy fuck, what is wrong with me?
He consumes my every waking thought and now my dreams too.
This has to end.
Maybe Alex was right, maybe we both need closure.
I grab my phone from my nightstand. And set it back down.
No. This needs to be in person. After my date with Kellan.