Chapter 25
There was a moment before Daniel left the house in which he debated wearing a bulletproof vest or one of those collars with massive spikes that protected dogs’ necks. Or a cup in his underwear.
He regretted not following through on any of that.
Lucinda stared at him from across her desk, her eyes narrowed and lips pursed, bringing out the laugh lines surrounding her full mouth.
The terse silence hanging in the air was as far from laughter as one could get.
Although she hadn’t said a word since Daniel walked in and took a seat—his balls receding into his body and his heart thrumming painfully in his chest—her disappointment was audible.
Taking a deep breath, he attempted to sit up straight. “I can’t do this anymore,” Daniel admitted, breaking the silent standoff.
“You’re quitting.”
“Yes, it’s …” He struggled to find the words even though he’d been mentally preparing for this conversation all day.
For years he’d been fine with everything he did within the walls of the Lillian.
It had just been work, something that got him a paycheck and allowed him to cover rent and eat.
Getting on his knees or back hadn’t been emotionally taxing for him.
He wasn’t sure if he’d been able to shut off his brain or compartmentalize the work or what.
But he had been truly at peace with what he did.
He had enjoyed it most of the time, and gotten heavy doses of satisfaction from satisfying other people.
Those feelings had dissipated years ago though.
Now the thought of flirting with people in the bar and taking their money and cocks had a deep melancholy sweeping through his body. And he didn’t have to do it. He had a job he was excited about and people who would catch him when he fell.
Letting out a heavy breath, he said, “I can’t handle doing this work anymore. It’s making me miserable.”
“I know.” Lucinda gave him a gentle look. “Why do you think I’ve been putting you behind the bar?”
Brow creasing, he laced his clammy hands together over his rioting stomach. “Because Tyler was sick, Ricardo wanted to leave, and you couldn’t find anyone to hire?”
The look in her eye turned from gentle to almost pitying.
“You really think I couldn’t find a single person in the entire city that wanted to work for the salary I’m offering and the tips they’d get?
If I opened the position, I’d be flooded with people who would willingly turn a blind eye to the nature of our business for the benefits alone. ”
“But you said …”
“I’m a liar, Daniel. But you are too, so I know you’ll forgive me.
” She sat back in her chair, resting her hands on the armrests.
“Sex work is just like any other work. You clock in, make customers happy, clock out, and try not to let the drudgery of everything that happens between coming and leaving get to you. But, just like any other job, there’s the possibility of burnout and personal growth that makes the job no longer a good fit.
I could see you getting burned out, and even more, I could see the work was starting to get to you. ”
“I didn’t have any other options, and I wouldn’t make enough bartending.”
“But you will be making enough at Butler Events?” Lucinda tilted her head to the side and smirked. “Close your mouth, darling—you never know what might end up in it in this hotel. I received a call a few days ago asking about your job performance. I assume you got the position?”
Oh God. This conversation was surely taking years off his life and elevating his blood pressure.
“I told them you were my best employee,” she continued. “And that I’d hate to lose you but you were ready for more.”
Some muscle in his chest hitched. “Lucinda …”
“Unfortunately, I do have to lay you off.” She shook her head in a pitying nature and started rifling through folders on her desk.
“I’m afraid the economy is tough and I have to make some cuts in order to continue operating.
Of course, we are able to offer you a severance package to ease this unexpected financial burden. ”
Daniel took the papers she held out to him, his mouth once again hanging open and mind struck dumb. He stared down at them, unseeing. Not a single printed word made it past his eyes, and they all blurred together more the longer he looked at them.
“In addition to a lump sum, you’ll be paid out all your unclaimed tuition reimbursement for the years you’ve worked here.”
Daniel’s head whipped up, and he was mortified to realize it wasn’t the words blurring as a hot tear escaped the corner of his eye.
He quickly wiped it away and searched his boss’s face through the water budding along his lashes.
“Lucinda,” he said again. “I don’t … I don’t know what to say. Why would you do all this for me?”
Her lips curved into a gentle, maternal smile. “People want to help you, Daniel. You just have to let them.”
“But …” He shook his head and looked back down at the papers in his hand. “But this money is—”
“Something you could have gotten earlier if you’d just talked to me. For several reasons, I can’t have my employees desperate or upset with the work they do. And I have quite a bit of money I need to offload for my boss. But more than that, I do care about you, Daniel.”
“I care about you too.” Somewhere along the way, Lucinda had become more than just his boss.
He had started thinking about her somewhat as a friend—a scary friend who probably knew how to get rid of bodies.
And while Daniel wouldn’t miss the job, he would miss slinking into her office to devour some takeout or gossip about things that had happened at the hotel.
“Don’t become a stranger,” she said, mirroring his thoughts.
Shaking his head, he swallowed back the emotion and gathered himself. “Wouldn’t dream of it, Luc.”
A twinkle appeared in her eye, and she made a shooing gesture. “Now say thank you and get out of my office so I can work.”
“Thank you,” Daniel said, stressing each letter, trying to put all his overwhelming gratitude into just two words.
With one last wobbly smile, he passed through the door feeling much lighter than when he’d entered. That lightness floated him down the hall and into the lobby where he saw Jensen taking photos of the prominent staircase with his phone.
God, Daniel loved that nerdy man.
A sharp breath pulled into his lungs, smelling of cleaning products, vintage ventilation, and wood.
He loved Jensen. Loved how he was both shy and fierce.
Loved that he knew exactly who he was and wasn’t ashamed of it.
Loved that he cared so fucking deeply about things that mattered and brushed off anything that didn’t.
Daniel loved that he was dependable and loyal and unintentionally funny.
He loved him and had for quite some time.
And because he knew who Jensen was, the realization didn’t come with fear that he’d be discarded or forgotten about.
He didn’t worry that Jensen would leave the moment things got difficult, because things had been difficult already.
All he felt was peace, like his heart had landed on a sure surface and could finally rest.
Jensen must have realized he was being watched, because his gaze dashed up to Daniel before he went back to his phone to take yet another photo from a different angle.
“Eugène Viollet-le-Duc worked on restoring several buildings in France, including Notre Dame, and even consulted on part of the Statue of Liberty. The way he used iron inspired the work of other architects in the art nouveau movement.” He dragged a finger down a curved line.
“I wonder if this was copied directly from one of his drawings or if it’s just remarkably similar. ”
“I know.” Daniel shoved his hands in his pockets. “I read your book.”
Jensen looked up, a hopeful smile forming. “You read my book?”
Daniel shrugged. “Yeah, I thought it was really interesting.”
“You and thirty others,” Jensen said good-naturedly and tucked his phone away.
“I loved it,” Daniel said, taking even, confident steps toward him. “And I love you.”
“Oh.” Jensen blinked and looked down at Daniel, his glasses sliding down his nose a fraction. “Are you sure?”
Daniel couldn’t help but laugh as he slid his hands up Jensen’s sweater and wrapped his arms around his neck. “Yes, handsome, I’m sure.”
A smile overtaking his face, Jensen clasped Daniel’s hips. “I love you too. So much.”
“Are you sure?” Daniel teased, tugging at a strand of Jensen’s hair as his heart skipped a beat and butterflies took flight in his stomach.
“I have never loved anyone or anything as much as I love you.” Jensen wrapped his long fingers around Daniel’s wrist and moved his hand up to kiss his palm.
“The earth could spin on for another billion years and no one would be able to match the love I feel for you. You restore me and make me want to be a better person. You’ve changed my life, and I can’t stand the thought of ever going back. ”
“Who said anything about going backward?”
“Not me.” Jensen brushed his lips against Daniel’s palm again. “Never me. I can’t wait for the future with you.”
Daniel took his hand back and replaced it with his own lips.
The kiss was gentle at first, just a soft meeting, until it wasn’t.
All at once, the events of the past week slammed into Daniel—hell, the events of the past few months flashed through his mind—and he felt so alive.
So alive and so fucking happy. It was like his life had restarted, like his heart had been sitting dormant for the past several years and had finally started beating again, pumping hot, fresh blood through his body and exciting him.
He tugged on Jensen’s sweater, forcing them closer together as Daniel parted his lips, deepening the kiss.
If they were anywhere else, he might be concerned about getting in trouble for public indecency.
The kiss, even as he tried his best to wrap himself around Jensen, was one of the least scandalous things he’d ever done in the hotel—maybe second only to giving a lost elderly couple directions to a nearby museum.
And he really couldn’t care less if anyone happened upon him shoving his hand underneath Jensen’s clothes to feel how his stomach moved with each breath.
How could he care about anything else in this moment?
All the burdens that plagued him had been cut down one by one, and even though his debt remained, everything was looking up.
He now had a huge payout to put toward his refinanced cards and private loans and a job that would pay him enough to chip away at the rest. And on top of all that, like a cherry on a very satisfying sundae, he had Jensen, who had somehow forced Daniel to open up his crusted-shut eyes and finally see a way forward.
Daniel pulled away, his lungs screaming for air, his lips wet, and his dick beginning to press against his zipper. A thought occurred to him, causing his lips to quirk. “Think we can get a room here for old times’ sake?”
Color rushed to Jensen’s cheeks, and he shot Daniel a bashful smile as he pulled a key out of his pocket. “I didn’t want to be presumptuous, but well … we’re already checked in.”
Daniel threw his head back and let out a laugh that sounded like triumph and relief and coming home after a long period away. Chest nearly bursting with how happy he was, he couldn’t help but attach a deeper meaning to Jensen’s words.
In regard to his life and his relationship, Daniel was so fucking checked in.