Chapter 43
THALRIC
She sleeps nestled within my wings, her breath soft and warm against my chest. My heart aches with every quiet sigh that escapes her lips, every gentle rise and fall of her slender shoulders.
Moonlight spills through the cavern entrance, bathing her in silver. She’s utterly beautiful, achingly vulnerable in sleep, and it breaks something deep inside me knowing what I must do.
She is much smaller than a Gargoyle female. Her kind are fragile compared to mine. And yet, she is strong in other ways. She has the heart of a warrior.
She is brilliant, fierce, and adorably stubborn. My heart still beats within my chest, but it is not mine and it hasn’t been for many years. It is hers.
Studying her delicate and lovely features, I trace my fingers over the petal-soft skin of her cheek. She looks like something sacred… something I was never meant to touch.
I wish I could hold her forever, shield her from the cruelty of fate, but I’ve heard enough to know there’s only one way to truly protect her—one way to ensure she lives.
I have to break her heart.
The thought sends a sharp pain through my chest. Instinctively, I draw her closer, pressing a tender kiss to her forehead, breathing in her scent of warm honeysuckle and lavender.
Bringing her into my nest was a mistake.
Holding her in my arms… it was the sweetest sin of my life. And the cruelest. Because I know what love like this does. It weakens walls. It cracks stone. It destroys everything I was made to be.
If I don’t push her away, she could succumb to Malvara’s curse. She could even die if Maribel’s spell wasn’t strong enough to counter the dark spell of the Goblin witch.
Guilt stabs at my chest as I slide my arm from beneath her and rise. She stirs instantly, lashes fluttering, and when her eyes find mine, my heart clenches when she gives me a sleepy smile.
“Thalric,” she murmurs, reaching for me. “Come back to bed. It’s still dark.”
She reaches for me again, but I catch her wrist before she can touch me. “No,” I murmur. “I must take you back to your chambers.”
Confusion clouds her face. “What? Why?”
“We cannot do this anymore. I should not hold you as I used to, Aurora.” I step back, wings folding tight, tail twitching before I force it still. “Because when I hold you, I forget who I am. What I am.”
Her brows draw together, hurt glinting in her eyes. “What are you saying?”
“I wasn’t meant to love you. It is not our fate.” My claws bite into my palms. “I was meant to protect. To guard. To be the sword and the shield that keeps you safe. When I hold you, I forget that. And if I forget again, it could mean your end.”
Her lips part, confusion giving way to disbelief. “Thalric—”
“You needed me last night,” I push on, my voice raw. “You asked for comfort. I gave it. I shouldn’t have. I let my instincts fail, and it could have cost you everything.” I close my fists to stop them from reaching for her. I must see this through. “I can’t let that happen again.”
Her eyes flash with hurt. “What are you saying?”
“That love isn’t indulgence.” I clench my jaw. “Love is sacrifice. Mine will be accepting that the only place I can have in your life is as your personal guard. It’s the only way I can protect you.”
She presses trembling hands to her mouth. “So you’re choosing duty over me?”
“I’m choosing your life.” The admission burns my throat. “If I don’t harden myself now, you could be the one to pay the price for it.”
“How can you say that?” Her voice quivers.
“Because my heart is stone,” I rasp. “Because I love you enough to let you go.” My jaw tightens. “I will be your guard and nothing more.”
She flinches, pain flashing across her face. “If you love me, fight for us, Thalric. We shouldn’t allow a curse to dictate our future.”
“Don’t you see?” I choke out. “You were cursed as an infant. Your parents sent you away knowing it would break them—because they loved you and wanted you to live. Fiora, Lyria, and Maribel raised you knowing they’d one day lose you, because destiny demanded it.
“Every act of love you’ve ever known was sacrifice.” I swallow hard. “Now it’s my turn. If I don’t do this, all of their pain means nothing. And I love you too much to risk your life because of me.”
“You don’t mean it.” Tears stream down her cheeks. “Please, don’t give up on us.”
“I have to.” My heart splinters with every word. “Ryllen is the only one who can break your curse. He can give you a future. He is a good male.”
“Ryllen?” Her voice cracks. “How can you stand here and encourage me to marry someone else?”
Because I love you too much not to. The words stay trapped in my chest. Instead, I manage, “Human hearts heal faster than ours,” I repeat what Maribel told me, praying she spoke the truth. “One day, you’ll look at Ryllen and forget me. You’ll be happy. And most importantly, you’ll be alive.”
Her tears fall freely now. “How dare you decide what my heart feels?”
I steel myself against the force of her pain, every part of me screaming to take it all back, to gather her close and never let her go. Instead, I scoop her into my arms. She stiffens, furious and heartbroken, her tears soaking into my skin.
Carefully, I fly her back up to her balcony, the weight of her grief pressing into me as I hold her to my chest. When we reach her chamber, I gently set her down beside the bed, my heart fracturing further as she turns to face me, anguish carved deeply into her face.
“Please, don’t do this,” she whispers brokenly. “I love you, Thalric.”
“You shouldn’t.” I clench my jaw. Each word slices through me like a blade, the pain nearly unbearable. But if I don’t do this now, she’ll never stop fighting, never stop choosing me over her own life. “You can’t. Not anymore. And I must do the same.”
She inhales sharply, hurt and betrayal easily read in her eyes. “Fine,” she says, turning her back to me. “If that’s what you want, then perhaps Fiora was right. Your heart is stone, and you never truly loved me at all.”
The words fall heavy and final, and I leave before I’m tempted to undo them.
When I reach my cave, I press my forehead to the cold rock as my claws score deep lines in the stone. I don’t know which aches more—the hollowness in my chest or the knowledge that I am the one who carved it.
Tilting my head back, I release an anguished roar that echoes through the night even as resolve hardens me.
I will carry this pain, and I will turn it into armor. For her.