Fraternizing with Friends #2
“And that on its own would be forgivable,” Gemma added. “But you’re also a whore!”
Jordan continued from there. “Which means, with the amount of people you come into contact with, you could one day accidentally infect someone else with your stupidity.”
Gemma took over. “It runs so rampant in you that if it’s not treated soon, it will become contagious…like an STD.”
“So harsh,” Tyler snickered.
“You are a disgrace to all Americans!” Jordan finished off. “You should be charged for breathing in the precious air that could’ve been used for the benefit of someone smarter. No, actually, you should be dragged outside and stoned to death in the street.”
Matthew chuckled. “You gotta love the honesty.”
“Am I wrong?” Neil asked.
“A little bit.” Tyler was desperately trying to hold back his laughter as he measured about two centimeters between his thumb and forefinger. “Just a tiny bit wrong.”
“But that just further proves my point,” Gemma slurred.
“It doesn’t matter who found America. The fact is we’re all still here.
Whether you know that bit of history doesn’t change that fact, doesn’t change our lives, so what does it matter?
I’m not saying history itself is not important.
I’m saying it doesn’t make a difference to know it. ”
“You need history so that mistakes are not repeated.” Matt was speaking slower now, visibly thinking about the words before he said them. “For instance: Neil, you’re an only child, right?”
“Right.”
“See?” He turned back to Gemma. “After that, his parents decided to stop reproducing. History made them learn from their mistakes.”
“Low blow, Matt.”
Matt ignored Neil and carried on. “But if it bothers you that much, we could get a petition started, another relo…relolu…” It was a tricky word for him at the moment and he took some time to practice it in his head before he tried again, breaking it into syllables this time.
“…rev-o-lu-tionary movement to ban it from all schools.”
“You are so inspiring,” Gemma said, looking at him adoringly. “But this conversation is too intelligent for my liking.” She nudged Matthew until he shifted out of the booth. “I’m gonna go pee and when I get back, you and I are hitting the dance floor.”
A tall, muscled cowboy came up behind her and smiled as his eyes skimmed her up and down. “Hi there, sweetheart.”
She groaned and turned to face the stranger. “Shoo, fly,” she said, waving him away with her hand. “Don’t bother me.”
He walked away after her curt dismissal and Neil slammed his palm on the table. “What is wrong with you? He’s gorgeous and you turned him down flat.”
She rolled her eyes. “Neil, there is only one thing I hate more than pet names and that’s generic pet names.”
“Agreed,” Jordan said, throwing her hand up like she was voting at a meeting. “My sentiments exactly.”
“Names like sweetheart and baby make me cringe,” Gemma explained. “And most guys only call you that so that they don’t have to remember your actual name.”
“I think pet names are sweet,” he countered.
“That’s where you and I differ, Neilums. You see, if I am taking the time out of my very busy schedule to ride a man’s cock…that bitch better know my name!”
Beer spurted out of Matthew’s mouth and he coughed several times after choking on the liquid he’d accidentally inhaled. Tyler was hunched over the table laughing and the ceaseless giggles were making Jordan’s stomach cramp.
Jordan had developed an immunity to Gemma’s radical comments over the years and was rarely shocked by anything that came out of her mouth. Matthew, however, had clearly not reached that point in the few hours they’d been sitting there.
“Are you okay?” Gemma rubbed his back, but was also giggling hysterically.
“I’m fine…fine. I just…I think some came out of my nose…and it burns like hell.”
More laughter erupted at the table and Jordan handed him a few tissues. Matt wiped his face and after he stopped sputtering, he looked up at Gemma. “I find you…strangely intriguing.”
She smiled. “I find you strangely attractive.”
The tomato tinge reddened Matt’s cheeks again. A shy grin curved on his lips as he watched her walk to the ladies room.
“I guess it’s a good thing you know her name, Matt,” Tyler teased.
“Shut up, Ty.” His eyes shifted to Jordan. “You know, never in a million years would I have imagined that this is the company you keep.”
“You say it like she’s the innocent one.” Neil said. “She’s probably worse than us.”
“Don’t let our accountant fool you.” Tyler sat back and smiled. “Neil’s right. She’s just as bad. She cusses like a trooper. And while you’re here, don’t let her challenge you to a game of pool. She’s a hustler, too.”
“You play pool, Jordan?”
“League and regional champion, Matt.”
Tyler said it with so much pride, she couldn’t help but smile. His arm moved around her shoulder and he gave her a quick kiss on the cheek.
Matthew groaned awkwardly and pulled a weird face. “Yeah, I’m not gonna get used to seeing that any time soon.”
Gemma returned from the restroom, picked up her hat from the seat and grabbed the front of Matthew’s shirt. “Let’s go, cowboy.”
He stood up immediately, seemingly anxious to get away from them. Neil slithered out of the booth as well. “I’m gonna go find me some dick, but, Tyler, if at any point in the night, you feel like you may be leaving alone, come find me. I’ll take care of that real fast.”
“Sure,” Tyler responded. He was already playing along and Jordan’s heart just melted.
“You wound me, Neil,” Matt said. “Only Tyler gets an offer. I’m your future consultant and that’s how you treat me?”
“Sorry, Matt. It’s not you, I promise. It’s just that Gemma called dibs on you as soon as you walked in the door. Usually we compete for the same guys, but dibs is sacred.”
Matthew’s face lit up with that statement.
“Can’t disrespect the Ho-code,” Neil continued. “You’re off limits to me. Jordan has never called dibs on Tyler, so he’s free game.”
Tyler watched them disappear into the crowd before he turned to face her with a slight smile tugging at his lips. “So you never called dibs on me? I’m hurt.”
“In my defense, I only found out we were sort of together yesterday.”
“Not sort of,” he corrected.
Those few simple words had her swooning like a love-struck teenager. He shifted in the seat, moving one arm along the backrest behind her as he leaned closer. “I’m dying to kiss you right now. Actually, I’ve been dying to kiss you since I got here.”
She gave a small shrug. “So kiss me.”
He shifted closer, pulling her legs onto his lap and then his lips met hers.
Slow and leisurely, he massaged her mouth with his.
See, this was the problem with Tyler’s kiss.
Tyler’s kiss didn’t just confine itself to her lips.
Tyler’s kiss drew a reaction from every single body part.
Knees went weak, breasts started tingling, thighs clenched together in anticipation.
She felt a big hand slowly moving higher up her leg.
And this was the problem with Tyler’s touch.
Once his hands got involved, she lost control of all body parts.
A moan escaped her before she could stop it. Her chest pressed against his and she found her hand sliding down his stomach until it reached his belt. With the amount of alcohol in her system, this could escalate very quickly and she reminded herself that they were in public.
She pulled away and broke the kiss. “We should dance.”
“Why? I’m really liking it here.”
“Tyler, I’m about five seconds away from pulling you into a bathroom stall and doing very, very bad things to you.”
His fingers pressed into her thighs and he smiled. “Told you,” he said, nipping her lip with his teeth. “I have the ability to make them good girls go bad.”
She giggled. Tyler Evans. The combination of personality traits one would not ordinarily associate together. Serious yet funny. Drama queen yet domineering. Weird yet so charming. Good guy yet a self-proclaimed bad-ass.
He slid out of the booth, took her hand and led her through the mass until they found Matt and Gemma. She smiled when she saw them and leaned down to Matt’s ear so he could hear her over the music.
“Were you two making out?” she shouted.
He shook his head with a naughty smile. “No!”
“That’s odd, because when you guys left the table, lipstick was on her lips and now it’s on yours.”
He laughed. “I like the color.”
Andy Grammer’s Honey, I’m good came blaring through the speakers and Gemma shrieked her excitement. “Less talking, more dancing,” she yelled.
The rest of the night pretty much went like this:
Hands clapping. Feet stomping. Line dancing with very limited coordination. So many strangers dancing in unison.
Neil threw his arms up. “How does everyone know this dance except me?”
Heads bobbing. Arms waving in the air. Cowboy boots sliding across the floor.
“More shots!” Gemma screamed.
Hips swaying. Skirts twirling. Faces turning red from heat and alcohol.
“Next round’s on me!” Matt hollered from the bar.
Gemma dancing on the table. Matthew fist pumping to the beat. Neil taking off his shirt and swinging it around in the air.
“Why is Neil stripping?” Tyler shouted as he spun her on the dance floor.
“Who cares?” she shouted back.
Dance moves became more creative, no longer fitting the music or the western theme. The twist melded with the mash potato.
“This dance is making me hungry,” Gemma slurred. “Freddy, we need some chicken wings over here!”
The choo-choo train incorporating a weird combination of arm flips and ass wiggling. It may have resembled the Macarena.
“Who the fuck drank my beer?” Jordan screamed.
Tyler laughed and spun her around again. “You did!”
More clapping. More stomping. More laughing. More ridiculous dancing.
Neil was shit-faced. Gemma and Matt were wasted and Jordan was more than a little tipsy. The person holding his liquor the best was Tyler, but he was by no means sober.
“Tequila!”