Chapter 34 Daisy
I stood at the funeral home dressed in a black dress, just behind Mom.
True to my word, I had turned up for breakfast, and we had gotten ready together.
I helped her choose her best pieces from her jewelry collection, so she looked her best. She was wearing her kutte over her black dress, and greeting everyone like a Hollywood starlet, gushing and thanking people for coming, accepting condolences like it was a competition.
I gave her some space so people could surround her, and so I wouldn’t be in the way.
It was slightly lonely. I had a few people come to me, giving their condolences, but most of the ol’ladies her age stayed away from me, judging me instead… and the ones my age didn’t know me.
Then Janie arrived with Granny and the kids.
Janie immediately came over to Mom and me.
She wrapped her arms around me in a hug and smiled apologetically, then greeted Mom.
Granny looked hard at me. This fierce independent old woman then held out her arms, and I stepped into them.
I felt comfort in those little spindly, chocolate-colored arms. Then other little arms, and one cast slipped around my body.
Here, this was my family. These were the people that supported me. Those others didn’t matter. I squeezed Granny a bit harder.
“You’ll be fine…God and us, we’re with you,” she said firmly as she pulled back and glared at me with fierce eyes.
I released my hold and all the arms dropped away.
“Thank you, Granny. Thank you, Stels, Eric, Trey, and D2. You’re all amazing,” I told them quietly.
Granny nodded at me, then took the kids into the room.
I watched them walk in as a unit, joined by Bull, who was low-key today.
Today didn’t involve him as President, just as a brother to a dead club member.
“Big D!!”
I turned slightly and caught Dylan as he jumped. Part of me was intrigued at how readily he accepted me, the other part delighted at his affection.
I hugged him close. “How are you, bud?” I asked.
“M good. Look, I got this for you!” He handed me a squashed flower.
“Thanks, Dylan.” I accepted the yellow daisy. “Did you know D2 is inside? Do you want to go say hello?”
His breath caught in excitement. “Yeah.” He wiggled.
I put him down and he ran inside.
“Hi Daisy. Glad to see you’re over your tantrum.”
I looked over at the man speaking, his arms stretched wide, and his yellow eyes twinkling as he came in for a hug.
“What tantrum would that be, Blaze?” I quickly stepped to the side so he’d miss me.
“The divorce.” He frowned.
“Oh, I’m still divorcing you,” I told him.
“But you were hugging Dylan!”
“Exactly. Dylan is adorable. Doesn’t mean you are.”
Mom hissed at me, “Daisy, not here!” Her face and voice changed as she looked at my soon-to-be ex.
“Hello Blaze. Thank you for coming, and for doing the eulogy, and everything else.” She grabbed Blaze’s hands and looked adoringly at him.
I felt sick. I had been negotiating with Morris this whole time because Mom couldn’t face making a decision, except that she insisted that Blaze was giving the eulogy, and if I wasn’t going to stand up there with him, I wasn’t going to be involved. Manipulation at its finest.
“Hey Daisy!” Four big arms wrapped around me. “Did you like the ride in?”
I laughed. “Yes! Thank you Bear. Thank you Horse. It was an amazing experience.”
“Hey, why do you say thank you to him first?” Horse complained, stepping away and pushing Blaze away from me with his body.
“Because he’s wearing the sergeant at arms patch,” I said, pointing at it.
“Aw, no fair…I get it next week,” Horse whined.
Bear shook his head, dropping his hands to his sides.
“Let’s just do it, Horse,” he said, shifting to stand just behind me.
Horse stood up behind me as well, making me look like I had bodyguards, which by how Blaze was reacting, I did.
He glared at the two men standing beside me, and gently untangled himself from Mom.
Then, without looking at me again, he walked into the funeral parlor.
Mom glared at the two boys. “She’s not divorcing him!” she hissed, sparks flying from her eyes at the audacity of these men keeping Blaze away from me.
Bear leaned close to me. “That true?” he rumbled in my ear.
I shook my head. “I’m divorcing him. I’m done,” I replied. “I deserve better.”
“Good choice,” was the answer over my left shoulder.
“Definitely,” was the response over my right.
My eyes caught a pair of grey ones as they passed me.
Jim gave a small smile as he took on the scene with my bodyguards and mother.
I swallowed. He gave a small nod in our general direction, which was replied to with nods from Horse and Bear.
Between the three men, I felt better…supported.
I breathed in a deep breath of fresh air. I’ll get through this.
People slowly trickled in. Mom eventually walked in too, leaving just me and my bodyguards. I took a breath and waited for the last few people to drift in. A woman with hot pink hair left a young woman standing alone awkwardly near the curb and walked purposefully up to me. She held out her hand.
“Hi, I’m Shaquilla. I run the flower shop. My condolences on your father’s death.”
I accepted it as Bear started growling. She looked at him angrily through her lashes.
“Oh shut it, you! He’s an asshole, and everyone knows she deserves better. I’m not here for him,” she snapped.
I looked between the two of them, wondering what was going on.
Bear shook his head and slapped Horse on the chest. He nodded towards the room, and they walked inside.
I looked at Shaquilla carefully. There was something going on that I didn’t know about. She took no more notice, and launched into speech.
“I have two things I want to discuss quickly. First, rumor is that you’re divorcing Blaze. True?” She seemed nervous.
“I am, yes.”
“Good, I’ll help. I’ll do my best to talk him into signing the papers.”
“Thanks.” I was suspicious.
“Second—” She drew a shaky breath. “Do you recognize that girl over there?” She pointed at the blond girl who she’d been talking to earlier.
The young girl shifted her feet and looked down. She looked vaguely familiar.
“Should I?” I asked Shaquilla.
“She’s here to attend her fathers funeral,” Shaquilla answered.
“Even though she never met him.” She kept her eyes on me.
I looked at the girl and she lifted her head nervously.
It struck me. She looked like me. Not identical, but I could see similarities.
Shaquilla continued, making sure she was extra clear.
“Your father had another daughter, like Blaze had Dylan. Do you believe me?” She seemed to hold her breath while I absorbed the new information.
Rage started sinking into me. Dad hadn’t completely wrapped it up. He had a mistake, and he also hadn’t claimed her.
I looked at Shaquilla, thinking about my childhood.
There had been a particularly difficult period when Mom refused Dad’s apology necklaces, and he had to resort to proper diamonds.
Those were actually really good times. For six months, he’d come home straight away and be with us.
We were a normal family. Then things went back to our type of normal. I did believe her.
“When did she find out?” I asked Shaquilla.
“A few months ago. Her mother finally told her when she died. It was a big secret,” she replied.
I drew a breath, pieces falling into place.
Including the fact that not only was my father’s love-child not acknowledged or accepted by anyone in my family, but my husband’s was, and was being pushed on me without any opportunity to keep it a secret, even if I wanted to.
Well, this will not remain a secret anymore.
I’ll give the ol’ladies something else to gossip about.
The girl shifted nervously and tossed her hair over her shoulder in a familiar motion.
It wasn’t my motion, though. It belonged to someone I’d seen a few weeks ago in a very compromising position with my ex-husband.
Oh, this was getting better and better. This girl was the same one that I’d caught Blaze out with in the club.
The one he’d been fingers deep in. I took a deep breath and walked over to her.
“Amber?”
She lifted her head and looked at me, fear flooding her eyes. She swallowed nervously and glanced at Shaquilla, then back to me.
I looked hard at Amber. The similarities between us were definitely there. It was more than just the hair.
“How old are you, Amber?” I asked.
“Nineteen.”
The timing was right. It was nineteen years ago that Dad reverted back to his usual self.
“I always wanted a sister. Now I’ve got one,” I whispered. She gave me a shaky, relieved smile. I reached forward and hugged her. Her arms gingerly snuck around me.
“Come on in,” I told both women as we broke apart.
Amber’s face was glowing and teary. I held my head high and led them into the funeral home with my hand clasping both of theirs tightly.
I wasn’t letting them hide. My father’s daughters were going to sit together at his funeral.
He may not have acknowledged her, but I would.
We walked right up to the front, and I heard the whispers start as I passed.
The similarities would be glaringly obvious when we were next to each other.
Mom glanced towards me as I made my way up.
She had a slight smile on her face as she sat next to Blaze and left the rest of the pew for me.
Mom had obviously planned for me to sit next to Blaze.
Instead, I sat Amber next to me, Shaquilla next to her, then Blaze, then Mom. Rage flashed across Mom’s face.
“Hey Aunty Shaq, what are you doing up here? I thought Dad said you had to be at the back of everyone if you came?” Dylan crawled from Blaze, and into Shaquilla’s lap.
“Big Daisy told me I had to sit here, and she’s the boss Daisy,” Shaquilla mentioned to him, then looked at me. “I’m sorry. I’ll explain later.”
“No she not. D2 is boss Daisy. She my best friend,” Dylan said as he wiggled around to make himself more comfortable. Shaquilla’s comment to Bear rang in my ears. Was she one of Blaze’s conquests?
I gritted my teeth. More questions, more secrets.
Funerals were supposed to be about endings.
I took a breath. I wouldn’t make a scene and demand the answers now.
There’d be a better time and place. Shaquilla said she’d help with my divorce, and that was a priority.
Although, right now I could happily walk out of this town and disappear again.
The only thing that would keep me here was Jim, who threw me a concerned look from the other side of the aisle, where he was sitting with Bull and Janie.
“Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for coming today to celebrate the life of Reginald Arthur Smith, also known as Matchstick,” Morris started the ball rolling.