Chapter 13
Chapter Thirteen
“I thought you were in Fiji.”
Poppy headed for the kitchen, trying to collect herself.
Seeing Owen standing there on the porch like a ghost from a previous life had scattered every thought from her mind.
She busied herself putting the pie away and filling the tea kettle, nervously setting it on the stove as Owen leaned against the counter, watching her.
“I was,” he replied. “You were right when you booked it. The honeymoon sunset cruise was magical. A little less magical being the only single man on a boat of happy couples whispering sweet nothings in each other’s ears, but what can you do?
” Owen shot her a rueful smile, and right away, Poppy was washed in a tidal wave of guilt.
She wasn’t supposed to be out on dates, having fun, and walking on the beach at dawn breathing in the crisp salty breeze.
She was supposed to be on that cruise with him.
She was supposed to be his wife by now, setting out on their life together, instead of avoiding his gaze, her skin still flushed with desire for some other man.
Cooper.
Poppy felt a pang. She’d hated brushing him off like that, but her worlds had been colliding in one unholy mess, and she couldn’t focus on Owen with Cooper so close.
When he was around, she couldn’t see anything but him, and that wasn’t fair to Owen, not after everything. She just hoped Cooper understood.
“So, that guy . . .” Owen continued, as if he’d seen it written all over her face. “He’s just a friend?”
Poppy took a breath. “Yes. No. Nothing’s happened,” she said quickly, still feeling like she owed him an explanation. “We had dinner, and . . .” She gulped. “I mean, I just met him. Here. He wasn’t . . .”
“The reason you left me,” Owen finished.
Poppy cringed. It was bad enough when she’d sat him down that day to tell him it was over, but now, she had a different kind of guilt to reckon with.
Standing here with Owen, he felt like a stranger.
Part of a life she hadn’t even thought about in weeks.
They’d shared their hopes and dreams, spent years together, and picked out their future right down to the china pattern on the registry list, but all that had faded away, so far it felt like a dream.
It was shameful just how fast she’d cast him aside, and even though she knew it was a sign that their relationship had always been doomed to failure, Poppy still ached to see the sadness in his eyes.
“Owen . . .” She didn’t know what to say. “What are you doing here?”
“I thought, maybe if we talked . . .” he began, his expression turning hopeful. “You got cold feet, and I get it. All the wedding plans, our families—it was crazy. You needed some time to yourself, to figure it out. But we can make this work.”
“Owen, no.” She shook her head. “I’m sorry. You know I never meant to hurt you, but I meant what I said. I can’t marry you.”
“So we don’t get married.” Owen closed the distance between them and took her hands, holding tight. “We stay engaged, or just together. Whatever you want. I don’t need a piece of paper to know you’re mine.”
Poppy stepped back. “But I’m not. Yours.” She looked up at him, searching for a way to make him understand. “You know I’m right. It’s been wrong for a long time between us.”
He shook his head stubbornly. “Things were fine.”
“Fine,” Poppy echoed sadly. “Is that what you really want? To build a life together on ‘fine’? Don’t you think you deserve more than that?”
Owen sagged. “We could try—”
“Please.” Poppy stopped him. “Don’t. I care about you, you know I do. But I need more than that, and you should, too. You deserve to be with someone who can’t imagine a world without you, who wakes up every day filled with gladness that they get to share their life with you. Not just ‘fine.’ ”
Owen dropped her hands. He slowly went and took a seat at the table, and Poppy could see the denial finally slip away. “You couldn’t have figured all this out before we sent the invites?” he asked with a rueful look.
“I’m sorry. But imagine if we’d gone through with the wedding,” she pointed out. “We’d be hiring divorce lawyers instead of just sending gifts back.”
To anyone else, that wouldn’t have been much consolation, but Owen was always the frugal one.
He spent hours on the internet looking up bargain deals, and set up a whole system for her to track her budget.
Now, he nodded, looking more cheerful. “You’re right.
New York is an equitable property state, too. That would have gotten messy.”
Poppy let out a small breath of relief. She was the emotional one, but Owen had always weighed things with logic and fact. It was one of the reasons it would have never worked between them, but now she was relieved she had a way to make him feel better.
“And think about if we’d bought a house together,” she continued. “Or combined our finances, too. I had to do this now,” she said softly. “Before we went too far to take it back.”
He nodded again slowly. “I figured it was worth one last try,” he said, giving her a familiar smile. “In case I could talk you around. I had a whole list prepared of reasons why we should stay together.”
“That’s sweet.” Poppy exhaled. “But this isn’t like my retirement plan, or deciding whether or not to get a dog. A pro/con list doesn’t really work for love.”
Owen opened his mouth like he was going to argue, then stopped. “Not for you, no, it doesn’t.”
The tea kettle whistled, and Poppy poured them two cups. She joined him at the table. “Did you get the last of the gifts returned?” she asked, and he nodded. “I’ll be sure to send thank-you notes, all the same.”
“You might want to steer clear of my mom for a while,” he said, making a face. “You’re not exactly her favorite person right now. Or my sister’s.”
“No, I’d imagine not.” Poppy thought of Owen’s over-protective family and breathed a sigh of relief.
Maybe there was a silver lining to this break-up business, after all.
“What about you?” she asked. “It’s a long drive back to New York this late.
You’re welcome to stay here, there are plenty of rooms.”
Owen shook his head. “I’d prefer to get on the road.”
“OK.” Poppy toyed with her mug. She felt like she should say something, but she wasn’t sure what was left to say.
Maybe Owen had imagined this last-ditch effort chasing after her would change her mind, but it had only made her resolve stronger.
Looking at him now, she felt affection and regret, but the kind you feel for an old friend whose life has taken a different path.
Not the excitement she dreamed about in a partner, the love she’d been writing for her characters all these years.
She’d felt more passion in one kiss with Cooper than she had in her whole relationship with Owen.
“We had it good though, didn’t we?” Owen gave her a nostalgic smile. “For a while, at least.”
“We did.” Poppy reached out and squeezed his hand. “I’m sorry, for everything.”
“I know.” He squeezed back. “But you’re right. I think a part of me has always known you’re right.” He looked rueful. “I guess just because something adds up on paper doesn’t mean it’s real.”
“You’ll find it,” she reassured him. “You’re a good man, and somewhere, there’s a woman who can’t wait to meet you. And hey, maybe she’ll love Doctor Who, too.”
He smiled. “It would be nice to share my hobbies with someone,” he agreed. “I always felt like you didn’t really understand.”
“Oh, I didn’t.” Poppy grinned. “I tried, but I pretty much started zoning out every time you mentioned regeneration and the star wars.”
“Time Wars,” he corrected her.
“There you go.”
Owen finished his tea and stood. “I better hit the road.”
She showed him to the door again, and watched him pull his coat back on. “Thank you, for coming out here.” Poppy felt a curious mix of sadness and resolve. “I think it was good, to see each other like this.”
“Without passions running high.” Owen nodded. “You take care,” he said, giving her an abrupt hug.
“You too.” Poppy hugged him back.
“And about that friend of yours . . .” Owen paused in the doorway. “It’s none of my business, but the way he was glaring at me, I’m guessing there’s more than friendship on his mind.”
Poppy flushed. “Maybe,” she admitted. “But I’m not sure we’re compatible.”
Owen raised an eyebrow. “Weren’t you the one who said love can’t be calculated by a pro/con list?”
There he was with the logic again.
“Take care,” Poppy said, as he headed out into the dark night. “Travel safe.”
She closed the door behind him, and it felt like she was closing a chapter of her life. She looked around the cottage, warm and cozy, and felt a sense of peace sweep through her.
Whatever came next was up to her.
She saw her phone sitting on the entry table, and wondered what Cooper was doing. Was he home alone, kicked back watching TV? Or working on some project, late into the night?
Was he thinking about her, the way she was thinking about him—his smile, his body, his mouth . . . ?
Poppy shook away those tempting thoughts. She couldn’t just call him up and invite him over now, to pick right up where they’d left off on their date. No, she sighed. It was late and the moment had definitely passed.
Then her gaze landed on the paper bag with the dessert box. She smiled, and went to cut herself a slice. She sat in the kitchen, and savored every bite. She may not have any idea what was going on with Cooper, but she had apple pie, and a whole new beginning.
The rest could wait until tomorrow.