Chapter 17
SEVENTEEN
Breakfast the next morning was a quiet affair, with Mum and Douglas away. I hadn’t seen Alexander since our interrupted kiss, as when I had arrived home with Constance after lunch, I spent a couple of hours with Coco, who then suggested going out to a restaurant in York where a friend of hers was working. It had been good to be out and, as I had driven and Coco was staying out to go clubbing with her friend, I had got to bed early, drunk nothing but elderflower cordial and consequently woken up with a clear head and more energy than I’d had in months.
‘What time did you get home last night?’ I asked her, as we carried through the breakfast things.
‘This morning, more like,’ she said, grinning. ‘It was just past two. I hope I didn’t wake anyone up.’
We all shook our heads.
‘I wish I still had that stamina,’ said Constance. ‘Funny now how I can dig and work all day in stupid temperatures and be fine, but if I’m in bed later than ten thirty, I feel it for a week – and show it. You, darling Coco, look as beautiful and fresh-faced as ever.’
Coco put her hands in a ‘v’ shape under her chin and pouted, and Constance laughed.
‘Theo being born did it for me,’ said Alexander, hugging his son. ‘I’ve never quite been the same since. Having worked plenty of nights in surgery, you’d think I’d be perfect for getting up at night with a baby, but it was more punishing, I’m sure of it.’
‘Did Mum get up in the night too?’ asked Theo.
There was a tiny pause. I had rarely heard her mentioned.
‘She did,’ replied Alexander, his voice light. ‘But these things are often a two-person job.’
‘What are you all up to today?’ asked Coco.
My phone pinged.
‘Ah ha!’ I said, reading the message. ‘Well, we are going to be extremely busy, as it happens – if you can bear to forgo a morning at the sanctuary, Theo?’
‘Has the van arrived?’ he asked, his face lighting up with excitement.
‘It’s about five minutes away,’ I said, ‘so we’d better finish up our breakfast.’
We did so, quickly, and the five of us were pulling on coats and opening the front door when the vintage Citro?n HY van came slowly up to the front of the house, followed by a small red car.
‘Fallon?’ asked the woman who had been driving the van.
‘That’s me,’ I said, going forward and shaking her hand. ‘And this is Alexander, the proud new owner.’
I introduced the rest of the family to the woman, whose name was Tara, and the man who had followed in the car behind, Greg.
‘Come and see your new van,’ said Tara, and led us around. Alexander and I had, of course, seen plenty of photos, but seeing it for real was exciting. It had been painted in shades of pale green and purple, to represent the heather on the moors, and the painted signs and decals with Alexander’s logo were immaculate. Greg went inside to open up the side flaps and we all oohed and aahed at our first glimpse of the inside of the van. The back wall was tiled with cream metro tiles above a wooden countertop which would soon be filled with bottles. Glasses were stored hanging in racks and there was a fridge under the counter. A small sink was fitted to the left.
‘It’s adorable!’ said Coco. ‘And I love the lighting. I never realised it would be so cool. Can we come inside?’
‘Maybe just two at a time,’ said Greg, smiling, and he came out. I stood back to let Alexander and Theo be the first inside, but Alexander put a warm hand in the small of my back and said:
‘You come, too, Fallon, I’m sure the three of us will fit just fine. You made this happen, you should be one of the first in.’
Unbelievably touched, I didn’t reply for fear of my voice cracking and giving away the strength of my emotions. I let him steer me gently inside, where we marvelled at the clever way everything fitted in so neatly and looked so very smart. I got a couple of glasses down for Theo, who pretended to serve Constance and Coco drinks.
‘I’m afraid we only have gin, madam, not whisky,’ he said to Constance, his face wreathed with smiles. ‘But I can make yours extra enormous if you like.’
She roared with laughter.
‘That’s my boy! Always liked a bartender with a heavy hand.’
I sneaked a look at Alexander, who was gazing at his giggling son with bemused wonder. Constance and Coco toasted each other, then took their turn looking inside the van with Theo, while Alexander and I completed the paperwork. We waved Tara and Greg off until their little red car was out of sight, then all beamed around at one another.
‘It’s an absolute bloody triumph!’ said Constance, thumping Alexander on the back so hard he coughed. ‘You’ll be the talk of the Christmas Fayre.’
‘Thanks to Fallon,’ he said. ‘This was all her idea.’
‘Not my wallet, though,’ I said, ‘and not my risk. All credit to you for going with it. I’m glad it looks so good.’
‘Where are you going to keep it?’ asked Coco. ‘In one of the outbuildings?’
‘Yes,’ replied Alexander. ‘I’ve made a space in the old garage, and we’ll keep it there. In fact, I’ll take it round now and then we can get on with stocking and decorating it. Theo, will you go with your lovely aunts and get dressed for the day, and Fallon and I will see you round the back in ten minutes?’
The little boy nodded happily, gave his father a quick hug, and the three of them went back inside, leaving Alexander and me together. I instantly went into efficiency mode, awkward at being alone with him.
‘Right, you’ve got the key, haven’t you? Let’s start her up! I’ll go and shut the flap.’
I scuttled away before he could reply and secured the back of the van, feeling it judder as he turned on the ignition. I trotted back around to the passenger side and started to hop in. Of course, I had forgotten that the van was left-hand drive, and I almost ended up in Alexander’s lap.
‘Whoa, steady there!’ he said as I half fell back out again. ‘Are you okay?’
‘Yes, yep, fine!’ I called as I dashed around to climb in the other side. ‘Wrong driver’s side,’ I explained sheepishly, as I buckled myself in.
He laughed.
‘We’re both going to do that a lot over the next week or so,’ he said, and started to move the van slowly forward. We chugged around the side of the house to the stone outbuildings where the distillery was housed, then he stopped, jumped out and opened a pair of large double doors on one, before getting back in and expertly reversing the van inside. He quieted the ignition and turned to me.
‘Fallon, before Theo comes back and we get busy, I just wanted to say that yesterday – well, that is…I’m feeling very happy.’ He reached across and took my hand. ‘No pressure or anything, that’s it.’
I squeezed his hand and didn’t even try to curb the huge smile that was spreading across my face.
‘Me too.’
‘Good.’
Then he leant across and kissed me again, and all the same fireworks as yesterday fizzed and exploded like crazy inside my body, maybe more. We broke away and he cupped my face in his hand. I could feel the uneven scar against my cheek. He gazed at me as if I were the most precious thing he had ever seen, and all I could do was lose myself in his eyes. Who knows how long we would have stayed like that, the cramped cab of the van and the oily smell of the dark garage the most romantic scene I had ever experienced, if Theo had not come running across the yard outside, yelling that he had finished getting dressed. We stepped out and greeted him and I surprised myself by discovering that I was looking forward to spending the day with him.
‘Right, we’ve got lots to do,’ said Alexander, switching on the overhead lights to reveal a space that was bigger than expected. ‘The Christmas Fayre is approaching quickly, but we’ve got plenty of other commitments – including visiting the sanctuary – so we need to get lots done today.’
I knew that he liked to keep afternoons free to be with Theo, of course, and with the visits to the sanctuary and the Nativity rehearsals that would soon be starting up, we were pushed for time. But rather than feeling stressed and resentful, as I doubtless would have done a few weeks ago, I was energised by the challenge.
‘Absolutely. Now the first thing to do is make sure we have some music.’ I pulled my phone out of my pocket. ‘And as luck would have it, there is a cheesy Christmas playlist here ready to go.’ I tapped the screen a few times and pressed ‘play’ and the strains of ‘I Wish It Could Be Christmas Every Day’ floated reedily out of the phone’s speaker.
‘I can improve on that,’ said Alexander and, reaching up to a shelf, brought down a small speaker. ‘Bluetooth,’ he said by way of explanation. I took it from him, tapped a few more times and soon the song filled the small space.
‘ Now we’re ready to get started,’ I declared. ‘Alexander, you and I should maybe get going on stocking the bottles, and Theo, do you think you could be in charge of the blackboard?’
He nodded eagerly.
‘What do I have to do?’
‘Come back up to the house with me and we can get everything you’ll need,’ I said, smiling at his and Alexander’s confused faces. This was a surprise I had prepared for both of them. As we started walking, Theo, to my great surprise, grabbed my hand and started chattering away about Christmas, telling me why robins were traditionally the birds of the season and wondering if all the creatures at the sanctuary would be given stockings. Luckily for me, he was more delivering a stream of consciousness than wishing to hold a conversation, because my poor brain was too busy trying to adjust itself to holding a child’s hand to be able to formulate coherent sentences. I felt a curious mixture of alarmed, awkward and incredibly touched. Even I, with my little experience of small people, could appreciate that Theo’s taking of my hand was, particularly for a child who seemed to struggle with social stuff, a gesture of warmth and trust. That was nice. At the same time, I was terrified of responding incorrectly and offending him – was I holding his hand too tightly, or too loosely? How did we let go? Would Alexander mind this small intimacy, or might he think I was ‘doing an Annabel’ and trying to close in on his little family?
‘Where’s the stuff?’
‘Huh? Oh, right, the stuff.’ We had arrived back at the house and Theo dropped my hand to open the big front door. ‘It’s upstairs. You stay here and I’ll run and get it.’
I jogged up the stairs – well, up the first few stairs, until I got out of breath, then walked the rest of them, berating myself for not doing enough exercise – and to my room, where I collected the items I needed.
‘Here they are,’ I said, back in the hall again, and handed Theo a slim folder of papers, and a box of chalks and chalk pens. ‘You take these, I’ll carry the blackboard.’
We set off again back to the outbuildings, our hands now too full to entertain any more hand holding. There was Alexander, lugging a heavy box of bottles, which he put down when he saw us.
‘What have you got there?’
‘It’s a blackboard, which you can put on a stand outside with all the prices and choices written on it,’ I said, putting it down and starting to unpeel the cardboard that wrapped it. ‘I thought Theo could do the writing – I’ve printed out all the details – but look!’
I stripped off the packaging to reveal the board I had had printed with the same design that Alexander had on his labels as a border.
‘Fallon, it’s beautiful!’ he said. ‘This is going to look amazing, what a great idea!’
‘Thank you,’ I said modestly. ‘I’m glad you like it.’ I noticed that Theo was biting his lip, a worried habit I had noticed in him before. ‘Are you all right?’ I asked. ‘You don’t have to do the writing if you don’t want to, it’s fine.’
He shook his head but didn’t speak. I crouched down next to him and, after a split second’s hesitation, took his hand. ‘I can see something’s worrying you. Please tell me what it is, and I can help. Look, Runcible wants to know too.’
My little dog had trotted over, and I picked her up. Theo’s lips raised a fraction at the corners, and I waited patiently. After a moment, he spoke.
‘It’s just that your board is very pretty, and I don’t think my handwriting is good. I don’t want to spoil it.’
‘Oh, gosh, what a relief!’ I said, and he looked at me suspiciously. ‘I thought you didn’t want to do it, when this is the job I had in mind for you all along. Because, you see, I’ve seen your handwriting, and it is just perfect for this sign – it’s very neat and clear.’
‘My teacher said I should join it up, but it’s too difficult. Everyone else can,’ he added miserably.
‘Well then, thank goodness everyone else hasn’t been asked to write this board,’ I said firmly. ‘Joined up handwriting would ruin it. I want your best not joined up. Would you do that?’
The shadows fell from his face, and he nodded eagerly.
‘Yes, please. Can Runcible help?’
‘Of course she can, but her paw-writing is very messy, so she had better stick to advising you, if that’s okay.’
With that little hurdle jumped, I set the board up, got out the papers and showed him how to do his writing with chalk first, to make sure the spacing worked before going over it with chalk pen.
‘You’re a genius,’ muttered Alexander when I went over to help him with the box. ‘I thought we’d lost him for a moment there.’
‘I think it was probably more down to Runcible than me,’ I replied. ‘But I’m glad he’s happy.’
We busied ourselves for the next few hours filling the cabinets with gin and the fridge with tonic and a few other mixers in case people required them. After that I left Theo and Alexander attaching the now-finished blackboard to its stand and tackling a tangle of fairy lights while I went and collected some more pine and sweet chestnuts, Runcible pottering along with me. I then returned to the house to get big pots of syrup bubbling away and set the dishwasher going to sterilise glass bottles to pour it into. I toyed with the idea of making enough to sell alongside the gin and was looking up the logistics of doing this in the time we had available when they came in through the kitchen door. I looked up.
‘All finished?’ I asked.
‘All finished,’ said Alexander. ‘Those fairy lights were a pain, but you were right, they look great now they’re up.’
‘It smells delicious in here,’ said Theo, putting his nose in the air and sniffing.
‘I’m glad you like it,’ I replied. ‘I thought we could have some of the old batch just with tonic to see what it’s like. I’m thinking you could sell it as a cordial, then, as well as the gin, if it works well on its own. But I don’t think there’s time before the Christmas Fayre to get it organised.’
‘You could do it in time for the Burns Night thing in January that Dad’s doing,’ said Theo, peering into one of the large saucepans.
‘Ooh, don’t scald yourself,’ I said, turning the pot handle. ‘Burns Night? I’ll be back in London then, but I suppose I could work something up.’
Two pairs of dark blue eyes turned towards me.
‘Are you going away?’ asked Theo. ‘I suppose you’re only here on holiday, I forgot.’
He crouched down to pat Runcible, and I stirred the pans needlessly to give myself something to do.
‘Well, we don’t need to think about any of that now,’ said Alexander in an overly jolly voice, dropping his hand gently on Theo’s shoulder. ‘I think Fallon’s idea of tasting the syrups is a good one, and we should have some lunch too. Come on, Theo, you can help me put something together.’
The atmosphere eased as we all went about our different jobs, and before long, we were in the Hall, a tray of toast, cheese and some leftover roasted vegetables in front of us.
‘I like eating in here,’ said Theo. ‘It’s more comfortable than the Buttery.’ He turned to me. ‘We’re only eating in there all the time because of guests – we usually have lunch on our knees in here.’
Alexander laughed.
‘We do. You don’t mind, do you, Fallon?’
‘Of course not. And it’s so cosy with the fire. Here you are, I’ve brought a few glasses each because I want us to try each flavour with tonic but also with warmed apple juice.’
‘This is going to be the best cocktail bar in Yorkshire,’ said Theo, and we all beamed around at each other, the firelight flickering over our happy faces.