CHAPTER ELEVEN
JAMES
After dinner, we move to the couch, and Holly tucks herself against my side like she's done it a hundred times, even though this is the first time.
But it doesn’t feel like the first time. Everything feels so easy and natural with her. It makes me wonder why I tried to resist this in the first place. The candles are still burning on the table behind us, and the Christmas playlist I never bothered to turn on yet sits idle on my phone.
“Can I ask you something?” she says, her voice carefully neutral, so unlike her normally cheerful tone.
A pit forms in my stomach, even as I just as carefully say, “Of course.”
She licks her lips, her green eyes large as she looks up at me. “Your ex-wife. Are you over her? Like completely?”
That makes me relax. It’s a far easier question than I feared, and one with a very easy answer.
“It's been five years,” I say, then stop, and do the actual math instead of repeating the number I default to out of habit.
Letting out a chuckle, I shake my head, amazed at the passage of time.
“Actually closer to six, now that I think about it.
We don't talk. We don't see each other socially or professionally. She's in finance, so we’re in completely different circles. The divorce was about as clean as those things get. No kids, no house to fight over as we both didn’t want it, there was no lingering over anything.”
I think about it for another second, wanting to give her a deeper answer instead of just the easy one. “If I'm honest, I think I was over it within six months. By the time the papers were actually signed, we'd already been strangers for a while. Signing them just made it official.”
Holly studies me for a moment with her lips pressed tightly together, and then nods slowly. “That makes sense.”
“Does that answer it?”
“Yes.” A small, almost embarrassed smile spreads across her face and something in chest tugs. I love her smile, and when she’s not wearing one, it just seems wrong.
A small chuckle escapes her. “Sorry. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't accidentally a rebound five years in the making.”
“Six,” I correct, and she pokes an elbow into my side.
“You know what I meant.”
I nod because I do indeed know what she means. “What about you? All this concern about me, you don’t have an ex hiding somewhere plotting how to get you back?”
Holly’s entire body vibrates as she laughs. “Oh boy, yeah, no stalker exes in my past. It’s been a while since my last boyfriend or last date. You have nothing to worry about.”
Settling back against me, she snuggles closer and tilts her head up. “Can I ask you something else? Slightly less serious.”
“You can ask me anything.”
“Are we official? Dating, I mean.” She blushes but doesn’t break eye contact. “Not just figuring it out as we go.”
The question catches me off guard, mostly because I thought the answer was obvious and I'm only now realizing I never said it out loud. “I'd assumed so. Isn’t that what we decided when I asked for a second chance?”
She pulls back slightly. “I just want to be clear about it. I'm not someone who dates around while I'm figuring out if I like someone. If I'm with you, I'm only with you. I need to know you're the same.”
“I haven't looked at anyone else since the bar,” I say, and it’s the truth. Since meeting Holly she’s the only woman on my mind. The only woman I can imagine ever thinking about. “There hasn't been anyone to compare you to. I wouldn't know where to start.”
That earns me a slow smile, pleased and a little smug. She presses a kiss to the tip of my nose. “Good answer.”
Chuckling, I lean closer and give her nose a little rub with the tip of mine. “It helps that it's accurate.”
“So we're official. Boyfriend and girlfriend, like teenagers,” she breathes, each word blowing a tiny warm puff of air onto my lips.
Nodding, I slant my head. “If that's the terminology you'd like to use.”
“It's the terminology I'm using.”
I claim her lips, tasting the wine on her tongue and craving her in a way I never knew I could need another person.
When the kiss ends, I don’t want to let her go. I had no plans of getting her into my bed tonight when I invited her over for dinner. There were things I thought about though, and I still want them.
“Dance with me,” I say.
Her expression flickers between surprise and caution. “There's no music.”
I reach for my phone and set it on the coffee table, putting the Christmas playlist I had at ready to use. Bing Crosby starts crooning low through the small speaker. “Now there is.”
Holly laughs, but when I stand and hold a hand out to her, her lips part and her eyes sparkle. “You dance?”
“I do.”
I pull her in properly, one hand at the small of her back, and lead her through an easy turn that has her giggling in delight as she settles against me, her curves molding to my body as if she were made for me to hold.
Which I’m starting to suspect is the case.
I’ve never been one to be fanciful and dream about love.
Now I’m thinking that was another of my mistakes and maybe I should have been wishing for a Holly all along.
“James, you're actually good at this.”
“My mother insisted on lessons. Which I bitterly complained about even though as an adult I’m thankful she did.”
“Well, I'm glad your mother was relentless.”
We dance for a few moments before Holly suddenly says, “You don’t have a tree.”
Missing a step, I glance around the room as if this is my first time seeing it. “I don’t.”
“You really should.”
Laughing, I pull her tighter against me, melting into the softness of her curves. “Couldn’t we just share one of your four trees?”
“You want to share a Christmas tree?”
Resting my cheek against the top of her head, I smile. “I’d like to share a lot of things with you.”
We sway in my living room, surrounded by candlelight and the faint smell of garlic still hanging in the air from dinner, and I can't remember the last time I felt this content.
“Thank you for giving me another chance,” I murmur against her hair.
“Thank you for taking it.” She pulls back to look at me. “I know this is scary for you. But I'm scared, too. I like you so much already, and I know you could still change your mind.”
Her admission curls in my chest and we stop dancing. “I'm not going to change my mind.” The words come easily because they’re true.
“You can't promise that.”
“Yes, I can. Holly, I want to see where things lead for us.”
Her fingers tighten on my shoulders, and then her lips are on mine. As we kiss, I pour all my emotions and feelings into it, hoping she can feel my affection and need.
When we part for air, I gaze into her brilliant green eyes and see the woman I can imagine waking up with every morning for the rest of my life. “Stay,” I implore. “Tonight, just stay.”
“Are you sure?”
As if she needs to ask. Hopefully soon she’ll learn I don’t say anything I don’t mean. I claim her sweet lips again.
We stopped dancing completely as we kiss, her fingers wander up my neck curling into the short hairs at the nape of my neck.
My cock is hard and thick as it presses against her stomach.
That’s another beautiful thing about being with a woman so tall: I don’t get a cramp in my neck from bending to kiss her, and our lower bodies line up almost perfectly.
I trail my hands down her waist, lowering them to the tempting curves of her ass. Her ass is full and generous and so damn fun to grip and squeeze.
Holly’s lips leave mine as she kisses her way down along my jaw before nipping at my earlobe.
My groan is one of pure need as my fingers dig into the full globes of her ass, pulling her harder against me.
“If we don’t slow down, I’m going to end up bending you over the couch and taking you.
My earlobe stings as she bites down. Her breath is warm as she lightly blows over it. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
Desire explodes within me, and I waste no time moving her back over to the couch. My teeth rake over the tender skin of her neck as I nip and suck while shoving a hand down her jeans and claiming a breast with my other hand.
Moaning, Holly reaches down and undoes the snap and zipper of her jeans, giving me more freedom.
I slip my fingers into her underwear and find her curls slick with want. Dipping my fingers lower, I circle her clit as she grinds her ass back against my erection.
“Fuck,” I hiss, grinding back into her as I shove my hand up under her bra and pinch her nipple.
Parting her folds, I slip a finger up into her snug channel and quickly follow that with another one. Holly rocks against me, her hands planted on the arm of the couch. She’s so wet and hot, I’m on fire for her.
I finger her and suck at her neck, vaguely worried about leaving a hickey but beyond caring at this point.
As I squeeze a third finger into her, Holly makes a low keening moan, going up on her tiptoes before coming down hard on my hand. My fingers fuck her as my thumb swirls around her clit. I can feel the exact moment she comes as her pussy clamps down on my fingers.
“That’s it, come for me,” I whisper, continuing to pump my fingers into her grasping, squeezing pussy. “I can’t wait to have you grip my cock like you’re gripping my fingers.”
Holly’s breath pants out as she rides my fingers through her orgasm. Releasing her breast, I pull my hand out from under her bra and shirt and reach down to my pants, undoing the zipper and pulling out my cock. I stroke the long length, squeezing it in time to her pussy’s pulsating squeezes.
Only when the ripples of her inner muscles slow down do I slip my drenched fingers from inside her. My fingers are soaked and I switch hands, wiping her wetness all over my cock and groaning as I squeeze the head.
“Get those pants down,” I order.
She’s shaky but pulls her jeans and red panties down, her bare ass rubbing against my hand that’s fisting my cock. “Can I go in you bare?”
Bracing herself against the couch, Holly’s flushed face turns up to face me. “Yes.”
She watches as I bend my knees and line my cock up with her entrance, her eyes drifting shut as I slip into her.
Wet heat grips me, and as I grab her hips, it takes everything in me not to slam into her. Despite fingering her, she’s still so damn tight and I don’t want to hurt her, so I slowly thrust into her. Before long, I’m balls deep and she’s moaning as her pussy spasms around me.
“That’s it, Holly, you’re doing so good,” I praise as I thrust into her. This angle makes it feel like I’m impossibly deep, which turns me on even more.
Before long Holly is slamming her pussy back on my cock, taking every inch I can give her. The smell of sex fills my nose and my cock throbs as my balls tighten up.
“You want me to fill this sweet little pussy?” I groan as I increase the speed of my thrusts.
“Yes,” she moans as my soaked cock pulls out of her and then slams back in.
I look down, watching as she takes me, my glistening cock getting swallowed by her tight pussy.
That’s when my climax hits me and I thrust hard, holding myself deep in her as I come.
Holly pushes back against me, and I feel her fingers working her clit.
Releasing her hips, I cup her breasts, teasing her hard nipples and slowly thrusting my still-hard cock in her as she works herself up to another orgasm.
Her walls squeezing my sensitive cock as she comes is almost too much, and I moan her name.
Emotions fill me, some too big to think about.
It’s only later, after we put out the candles and staggered our way up to my bedroom, that I lay there listening to her breathe, feeling her warmth, and thinking about possibilities.
About what it might feel like to be someone's forever instead of someone's almost.
I'm not completely there yet. But with Holly, I think it could be an easy place to get to. She’s an easy woman to fall in love with.
The real question is, can she love me back? Asking her to fall for a man who isn’t as fun and carefree as she is might be too much. I hope it isn’t.