Fifteen – Morgan
Fifteen
Morgan
T he rest of the dinner was fascinating and delicious, just as Cal had promised. I learned a lot about Redwing’s inner workings and goals for the future. Owen had conquered dozens of hurdles to get PheroPass to this point, and there was still a daunting number between our current work and an official launch. If it ever got one.
Cal also talked openly about their shared history, how they met in a neurobiology lab and hit it off while dissecting a sheep brain, and promptly aligned their schedules to have more classes together. Even lived together for a while as graduate students. Their research collaborations were a natural extension of their friendship.
And yet, I couldn’t help but wonder as I watched Cal joke with Owen on our way out of the restaurant, why weren’t they pack mates? Their close bond was obvious. I knew Cal got along with Alijah, and Joaquin also seemed like a decent fit for his personality, all things considered. Plenty of people happily cohabitate with semi-feral tomcats.
As for Wyatt… Not a clue. I wasn’t sure they’d ever even met.
Could they connect over health? Cal didn’t strike me as a gym rat, not the way I was, or Wyatt’s physique seemed to indicate.
Sports might be a better topic, but football and gymnastics lacked common ground, something I’d struggled with while trying to explain my initial PheroPass feedback to Cal in a way he could understand.
Cal held the door for me, catching me off-guard when his free hand settled on the small of my back as I walked past.
“Let me know when the housewarming is, Owen. Can’t wait to see the place. Anything you boys want other than a houseplant? Something you can’t kill. Olive oil, maybe a broom? Think my grandmother used to give out pineapples.”
“Just the pleasure of your company.” Owen took a subtle glance at me, and the lingering presence of Cal’s large hand on my back, but his expression remained impassive.
“Sounds good.” Cal’s thumb trailed up the valley of my spine before falling away. “I’ll send you the draft of Morgan’s presentation with my notes later.”
“If you insist.” Owen unlocked a metallic red hybrid SUV I recognized from the parking garage at Tolliver Yards. This intelligent enigma really was my neighbor. “See you.”
We watched Owen drive off before starting toward Cal’s truck. He maneuvered his large body to the outside of the sidewalk, firmly between me and any incoming traffic.
“You impressed him. I knew you would.”
“Really? I couldn’t get a read on him.”
“Owen’s not that complicated.” He smiled down at me. “Big brain, even bigger alpha, allergic to small talk.”
“If you say so.”
“Have I ever steered you wrong?”
“You do have a pretty good track record, whereas I—” The words dried up. Our relationship had no room for personal feelings, and tonight had stuck mainly to business, but I couldn’t forget the crestfallen expression on Cal’s face. “I’m sorry if I said anything out of line earlier.”
“No need for apologies, although I appreciate the thought.”
Our arms pressed together, the momentary infusion of his body heat driving away the creeping autumn chill in the air.
I had so many questions about his family, especially his half-sister, but I couldn’t ask them. Not only was it unprofessional, but the risk of hitting a landmine was too great. Especially if something happened to his mother. Something terrible.
I fixed my gaze on the leaf-strewn pavement. Maybe he wouldn’t notice my hesitant curiosity.
“My mom isn’t off-limits.” Cal unlocked his truck with his key fob, and we paused a few steps from the passenger door. “But it’s what you’re thinking.”
“When?” I murmured.
“I was eight.”
Asking for confirmation felt like a crime, but even so, I looked up to meet his gaze. “After a pregnancy loss? ”
“Mhm. Waning syndrome ate her alive, but she never let on, not until the end.” Cal’s lips twisted into a knot as he gave a slight, heartrending shrug. “There’s no cure for a toxic relationship.”
I didn’t know what to say—what to do.
I had been so cavalier, mentioning waning syndrome like it was nothing, as if it was so easy to treat with a few purrs, hurting him, even though I hadn’t meant to.
Based on Owen’s carefully measured reaction and Cal’s body language, his pain ran much deeper than he was letting on.
She must have been an omega. A poorly treated omega. Why else did he respect my designation so much? Why did he never take our instincts or safety for granted?
“She always said I had good judgment.” His chest brushed against my shoulder as he opened the passenger door, then offered a hand to help me onto the seat. “That’s how I knew Owen was the biotech yin to my pheromone yang as soon as we met.”
Resting his forearm against the bottom of the passenger window, Cal angled his torso toward me, dropping down until his face was almost level with mine.
“Never thought I’d find a better collaborator.”
I was tempted to reach out and close the door, to put distance between myself and the creeping promise of his words, but the gentle anchor of his arm made it impossible.
“Then you came along.”
The hazy glow of the streetlamps caught the golden highlights in his hair and made his eyes sparkle with indulgent, affectionate mischief.
“You know, when I’m stuck doing budget work or trapped in a never-ending meeting, I think about you. The succinct way you phrase your late-night emails, that no one can argue with. How much detail you put into everything you do. All your ideas for PheroPass. It’s like…someone turned on the light, and my job is fun again. You make me feel more vibrant. More alive.” Cal leaned in with deliberate intent, his free hand cupping the back of my neck, his breath a whisper against my cheek. Flooding my system with the sweetest poison. “It’s addicting. And I want more… So much more.”
Eyes fixed on the hollow at the base of his throat, pretending that his handsome features weren’t moving ever closer, I tried to evade. To put up some defense.
“What do you mean, Dr. Carling?”
“That I’m dying to kiss you, Dr. Van Daal.”
He gave me plenty of time to stop him—if I wanted to—but my hands had already sought refuge within the soft folds of his cardigan.
Cal’s kiss swept over me like a wave of comforting bliss.
“So brilliant,” he murmured between languid slants of his lips across mine. “So beautiful. Drives me crazy.”
His fingers spanned the width of my lower back, shifting me toward the edge of the seat, allowing our connection to deepen. Kisses growing long and worshiping. Almost adoring. Overwhelming me with a sensation that I had long forgotten. Pleasure.
But it couldn’t last.
“No, Cal.” I pulled away, hoping my rejection seemed swift, certain—and brutal. Despite my kiss-stung lips and thundering heart. “We can’t.”
“I know you have a lot on your plate—”
“And that’s why this is so stupid. Maybe the stupidest thing either of us has ever done.”
“Okay.” Cal eased back, hands falling away. “We can table this for now.”
“Not happening. It can’t.”
“Morgan—”
“You already figured out the secret of Nonna’s seven-layer dip. Any other infractions tonight, and I might just have to kill you.”
Cal was momentarily speechless, although his furrowed brow and the tight fist digging into his thigh spoke volumes. “You’re treating this like a joke?”
“Would you rather I call it a mistake?”
His expression hardened, and he turned away, striding around the front of the cab, long legs making quick work of the distance, yanking his cardigan off before climbing into the driver’s seat, revealing a t-shirt underneath.
I shut the passenger door and buckled in with far more composure.
Paid no mind to the thickness of his biceps as he tossed the cardigan on the seat between us, how his forearms flexed as he put on his seat belt, or how deftly he slid the keys into the ignition despite the tension in his grip.
One embrace was not enough to enamor me, even with Cal’s large, capable hands. Which I most definitely hadn’t been eyeing for weeks.
My touch-starved omega was simply taking a moment to remind me that she was a greedy bitch at heart.
That’s all. Nothing more.
“I started the drink war with Owen, you know.” Cal glanced over his shoulder and eased the truck onto the street.
As if the kiss never happened. Which suited me fine. It really did .
“Used to leave bags of Earl Grey everywhere—inside his shoes and pockets, stuffed in the glove compartment, that type of thing. Umbrellas got the best result. Owen never noticed the thing was packed full until he’d whipped it out and dumped tea all over his head. The last straw was swapping out the emergency condom in his wallet. That’s why he’s kept things going out of spite.”
“Found himself with nothing but a tea bag at an inopportune moment?”
“Of course not. Owen is too fastidious for that.” Cal glanced between me and the rearview mirror. “Caught a whiff of tea-scented dollar bills and figured it out.”
“And how did he exact his revenge on you?” I asked with a smirk.
“Made sure I was served nothing but amaretto sours for the rest of the semester. Never thought it was possible to become more sober while drinking, but I did.”
“I take it you learned your lesson?”
“I don’t know.” Cal drummed his fingers on the steering wheel as he merged onto the expressway. “Have I?”
***
The remainder of the ride was silent until Cal pulled up to the front curb of Tolliver Yards, folding his arms on top of the steering wheel as he leaned forward, studying the mill complex through the windshield.
“Nice place.”
“Thanks. We like it.”
How many ill-advised kisses were customary before telling a guy you co-owned all the buildings in the immediate vicinity?
Cal shot an amused glance at the seat—where my hand unconsciously stroked his cardigan. Shit and double shit. I let go immediately.
“A well-earned trophy, milady. You more than delivered for PheroPass.”
“I can’t take your sweater.”
“But I want you to.”
“No—”
“We could trade for it. A bit of quid pro quo.” Cal leaned back, looking pensive as he traced the underside of the steering wheel with his thumb. “I know there are things you keep close to the vest. That you already have a medical team. A good one. Not trying to replace them or overstep my boundaries. But I’d really like to know more.”
“My lack of scent,” I said, eyes straying to the rumpled cardigan. Wishing he wasn’t so smart. That he was someone I could fool. But then he wouldn’t be Cal. “It bothers you.”
“The cause concerns me. Not its absence.” Cal shifted, angling himself toward me. “I have thoughts, suspicions—not knowing bothers me more than anything. I don’t want to push, it’s just… I see so many of my patients in you.”
It would be easy—oh, so easy—to hand myself over to Cal. He would take care of me despite everything. That wasn’t fair to him. He didn’t understand.
“You hanging around a lot of unmated omegas in their thirties, Dr. Carling?”
There was no teasing away the serious pheromone doctor persona, not tonight. “Morgan.”
“Cal.”
We looked at each other, his gaze heavy with professional foresight, mine restless and shrouded with caution. A car drove past, its headlights catching on Cal’s rugged features, the resulting shadows momentarily twisting his good-natured countenance into something unfamiliar—authoritative, almost clinical. But his sincerity never wavered.
“Okay, message received.” He retreated with grace, giving me the distance I insisted on…but was no longer sure I wanted. “Just know I’m here for you. Not as a second opinion, but as someone who cares.”
I should have taken his hand and laced our fingers together. Admitted that I’m an irreparable mess, a ticking timebomb, a useless omega, unable to react to his pheromones. Given him some form of genuine emotion. At least thanked him for caring. But I didn’t.
“Dinner was…surprising. But I enjoyed it.” I picked up my work bag and opened the door.
Cal nodded, but he didn’t offer the cardigan to me a second time. “Want me to drive you to campus in the morning?”
“No, it’s okay. Kelsey can take me,” I replied, stepping down from the truck. Ignoring my omega’s pleas to take his sweater with me. “Thanks for offering, though.”
“Anytime.” Cal gave me a full, achingly hollow smile. “I’ll text you later.”
“Night.” I closed the door and stepped back onto the sidewalk, intending to watch him leave.
Cal shot me a look, shook his head, and nodded toward the front door. Of course, he would ensure I safely entered the building before he left.
I paused in the front vestibule, watching Cal’s truck drive away, taking his fleeting warmth along with it.