Chapter 8 #2
She’d seen him only once throughout the entire day, after Birdie set flame to the wraiths. And as for the rest of the criminals–cadre, she corrected herself–she hadn’t seen them at all.
It was as if they disappeared.
Or, more likely, moved about the ship so perfectly, they avoided both knights altogether.
It didn’t offend her that she wasn’t invited to their conversations, she’d been on the outs more times than one and considering who they were and who she was, it only made sense to be wary of each other. But even if it didn’t bother her, it did concern her.
When darkness blotted out the sun and the sound of Birdie scuffling about on deck quieted, she crept out of her room, leaving Nora snoring in her bunk. This time, she didn’t head for the familiar ladder, she headed straight for the starboard quarters, where she suspected Stone to be.
The narrow hallway was almost completely dark save for the light seeping from the bottom of the door at the end. Aesira ran her fingers down the wooden panels that lined the walls but froze halfway when the door at the end burst open.
“Commander!” Patch waved her forward, a wide smile stretching across his lips. His dark hair fell loose near his shoulders and the crooked smile only made him more handsome. “Join us for a drink!”
Aesira took a tentative step. Her aim was to speak to Stone alone, question him using her training in the hopes of getting the truth out of what he’d been doing all day, see what his motives really were, but from the sounds coming from the doorway, it was unlikely that was going to happen.
Patch patted her back as she joined them around a small table in the room. Why they chose here and not the crew mess to gather was beyond her, but she squeezed in next to Birdie.
The table was quiet, only the faint pelt of sand against the window.
She’d always kept her circle small. Nev, Nora, and Kamari.
The only people she could truly rely on.
If someone had asked her if she ever imagined sharing a table with four Odega’s, she would have told them they were out of their mind.
“A drink?” Stone broke the silence, sliding a heavy, empty glass toward her before popping open the cork from a slender brown bottle.
“No thanks.” Aesira slid the glass back. She needed her head clear.
You need to stay in control.
Stone watched her long enough that heat crept over her skin but to her relief, he said nothing else before taking a long drink straight from the bottle.
He grimaced, his face puckering before handing it off to the woman to his left.
She had a warm face and bright, round eyes. “Don’t hog it,” she said with a smile.
Stone cleared his throat, drawing her attention back to him. “To what do we owe the pleasure, Commander?”
“Couldn’t sleep.” She shrugged. “Didn’t realize there was a party I was missing.”
“Hardly a party.” Birdie snatched the bottle from the other woman. “Anyone willingly heading to the Outpost deserves a drink.” The crew laughed darkly and raised their glasses.
“We’re…” She pushed the stray curls back from her face. “Tonight? We enter the Outpost tonight?”
“Our course is set to dock in the next few hours,” Stone said. She flicked her eyes back to him. “Nervous?”
“Why would I be?” She crossed her arms. Around the table, the rest of the crew sat relaxed, their faces and bodies giving away nothing about their day. No tremor in their hands. No sweat on their brow. No shifting of their eyes.
They weren’t nervous and truthfully, she wasn’t nervous either, but she couldn’t imagine a well-received welcome for two knights of the Order in a place that thrived without law.
She glanced back at Stone. He kept his eyes on her as he took a deep drink from the bottle. Her gaze snagged on the ink marked on the side of his neck, peeking out from under the collar of his white shirt. The outline of two stars. Two, not three, like Celestria’s symbol.
“If I interrupted something,” Aesira said, “by all means let me–” She tried to slide off the bench but Stone’s hand gripped around her forearm causing her to pause.
“You didn’t,” he said. “Stay.”
His hand lingered on her arm as she relaxed back into her seat and when he finally removed it, it was as if she'd been branded, seared by him. The warmth traveled up her arm and to her cheeks.
“Stone was just going off on one of his tangents,” the woman next to Birdie said. Her wide grin dimpled either side of her brown, plump cheeks. “Honestly we’re happy you found us, he would have talked us all to death.”
“It wasn’t a tangent, Bee.” Stone swirled the empty glass meant for Aesira, back and forth between his hands. A light pink swept across his cheeks and Aesira followed it as it trailed down his neck. Blushing? Was Stone Odega blushing? “It was the truth.”
“Here we go,” Patch said under his breath, running a hand across his jaw.
Stone shook his head. “I mean how is it that we were gifted galaxies and instead of spending our time celebrating the infinite and impossible nature of the stars, we’ve become too busy, too focused on the ground we can conquer and the people we can control.
” Stone’s fingers tapped the edge of the table and Aesira had a good suspicion that if she glanced underneath his leg would be bouncing as well.
“It’s a waste to see such miracles fade to the background in lieu of power," he said, his dark blue eyes shot to hers, pinning her in place. A heaviness crept into her chest, pressing like a weight on her lungs.
She was in a position of power.
She was in charge of order.
Discipline.
Punishment.
“Wow,” Birdie muttered. “Nothing truly gets you worked up like the stars does it?”
“Maybe a woman,” Patch said through a laugh. “If he ever landed one.”
Aesira’s eyes darted to Birdie, then to Stone.
That night at the Phoenix she’d seen Birdie and Stone together.
They’d sat so close, touched each other with more familiarity than two people on a crew together.
But as she watched them now, Birdie was more interested in Bee.
Holding her hand, the back of her neck. Kissing her cheek and whispering in her ear.
Aesira hated the relief that spread like warm water spilled onto a tabletop through her chest. Why did she care?
She didn’t, she decided. She wouldn’t care if Stone Odega slept with a hundred people, it wasn’t her business or her problem.
“Harsh,” Stone mumbled before taking another long pull from the bottle. The pink staining his cheeks deepened making his eyes look that much bluer.
“He could land any girl he wanted.” Bee reached over and ruffled his already unruly, auburn hair. “Thanks, Bee.”
“If he put in any effort,” she said.
“Again, harsh.” He shot her a glare which quickly dissolved when she kissed his cheek. Were they all so close as to touch each other?
“We’re just looking out for you Stoney,” Birdie chimed in. “Not natural for someone to go that long without–”
“And with that, I say it’s time for bed.” Stone shoved his glasses to the top of his head and pressed his palms into his eyes and she couldn’t help it, Aesira smiled. Each time she’d run into the smuggler it was nothing but sarcastic quips. It was nice to see him on the receiving end for once.
“Boo,” Bee and Birdie said in unison.
“Log a few hours before we dock, you deviants,” Stone said. The crew filed out, Aesira following behind Patch when Stone tapped her shoulder.
“Commander, a word?”
His blush hadn’t faded but he didn’t shy away when she met his gaze. “Yes?” she asked, retaking her seat.
“I figured it would be good if we discussed…” He gestured between them. “Before we get to the Outpost.”
“Discuss what exactly?” Sleep was beginning to weigh on her, her eyes scratchy and limbs heavy. If they were to dock at the Outpost within the next few hours, she’d need some semblance of rest.
“You know,” Stone said. “Discuss what happened between us.”
Aesira’s laugh was so jarring it made Stone jump from across the table. “Us? There is no us, Odega.”
He watched her, his eyes tracing her face from her brows to her lips. “I know that,” he said. “I just meant maybe we should clear the air. Lessen the awkwardness a bit.”
Now it was Aesira’s turn to blush. Heat scorched the tips of her ears down to her chest. “There’s nothing to talk about.” All humor was drained from her tone. She stood from the bench, a new determination to get as far away from Stone as possible fueling her steps.
“Right,” Stone said. “I guess it’s easier to ignore the fact that you kissed an Odega than accept it.”
She crossed her arms over her chest, wishing she couldn’t feel the hammering of her heart. “You’re right, I’d rather ignore the fact that it happened altogether.”
He took a ragged breath and downed what was left in the bottle. “You want to know what I think?”
“No. You’re reading too far into it.” She stood and turned for the door, ready to leave Stone and the memory of them in the Phoenix together behind her.
“I think you’re ashamed of what happened.”
Aesira spun around, mouth popped open but when Stone held up a hand, she closed it.
“I think you’re angry, too,” he said. “And not at me.” He took a step closer and she wanted to move back, but didn’t.
She stayed rooted in place, seeing what he would do.
“I think you’re angry at yourself for letting it go as far as it did.
” He brushed a piece of hair from her shoulder.
“And ashamed of how badly you liked it. Kissing someone like me. Wanting someone like me.”
Her teeth ground together, flames licking the tips of her ears and cheeks. “Like I said, you’re reading too far into what happened.” She took a step backward, letting a cool draft pool between them. “Don’t give it a second thought, I sure haven’t.”
“Fair enough. We agree then, it was nothing. Wouldn’t want to tarnish that Zeliath reputation.” Stone dusted her shoulder and smiled but something sharp pierced her chest again.
Her reputation.
How could he know it was her very reputation that she loathed?
It made people see her differently. Treat her like she was on a pedestal or fear her when they had no reason to.
It made it difficult to make genuine friends and absolutely impossible to find a partner which is exactly what the Order wanted.
To keep their knights loyal only to them, with no room for any outside distractions, but she was distracted and had been for some time now.
“Anyway,” Stone said, drawing out the word, “Let’s forget it ever happened. Agreed?” He stuck out his hand but she kept her arms crossed.
The night could have easily been with anyone else, but when she walked into the Phoenix, it was only him that she saw.
He was the only one in the tavern who didn’t look her way.
He didn’t offer to buy her a drink or sweet talk her ear because of her stature.
And so she made her move and then he ended up rejecting her.
She had no real reason to be angry. She’d done to others the same thing he’d done to her countless times, but being on the other side of his dismissal stung more than she cared to admit.
Normally, there wasn’t a grudge in the world that Aesira couldn’t hold onto for as long as possible.
She’d let it fester out of control until her mind warped what actually happened, making it seem that much worse.
But this time, she thought of Kamari. What she might do.
Rightfully born first, her sister was full of grace and patience. Two things Aesira could use a dose of.
“Commander?” Stone still had his hand suspended in the air. “Are you okay?”
“Agreed.” She gripped his hand in hers giving it a firm shake. “Let’s move on.”
It’s what Kamari would do.
Let it go.