5. Chapter Five
Chapter Five
Lana
Nikolai sets his hand on my knee as we sit in the back seat of the car, being driven to the reception. He didn’t hesitate to put it there.
All I can do is look at his large hand encompassing my knee.
The claim of it. The control. My eyes flick to his face to see how composed he looks.
No worries. Just pure confidence. What must that be like?
I may act confident but inside, I feel like I’m burning to a crisp, desperately trying to be perfect.
Being perfect hasn’t even worked for me in my dance career.
Will it work for me as a new wife?
I have no idea what I’m doing. Just that I have to protect my sisters from Nikolai.
“What are you thinking?” Nikolai asks as his thumb strokes circles into my skin.
Goosebumps break out over my body. I’m sure Nikolai can feel it but he doesn’t comment on it. “I’m thinking this is all new for me.”
“Of course it is. You’ve never been married before.”
“Have you been married before?”
His lips quirk. “No.”
“I don’t really know much about you.”
“Were you checking to see if I had a wife before you who mysteriously died?”
I shrug. “It’s a fair question.”
“When I desire a woman, I don’t want her dead.”
“What happens when you no longer desire her?”
Nikolai removes his hand from my knee but before I can breathe out, he gently grips my chin and turns my face towards his. “I have wanted you for months now, Lana. And I have finally made you mine. I am not going to kill you. Haven’t I protected you?”
“Yes.” My lips barely move. “You did.”
“So you have no reason to worry.”
“But you also caused the accident that made my sister get hurt.”
Darkness enters his eyes and he pulls his hand away. “It was just supposed to be a message. No one was supposed to get hurt. But it worked. It got your father to do what I wanted.”
I can’t help but shudder. The darkness in Nikolai is obvious. The lengths he’ll go to no matter what. “What is your relationship with my father exactly? Why weren’t you on good terms before?”
“We belong to different Bratva families. Ones that for years never got along. I inherited it after my father died. I didn’t see the need for fighting, especially when I set my eyes on you.
I saw an opportunity to have you by making peace with your father.
It was a good deal to me. Stop a war and get a beautiful wife all at the same time. ”
“You make it sound so… pragmatic.”
“That’s because it is. I wanted you so I now have you.” He sets his hand back on my knee. What would happen if he raised it higher? Would I let him touch me? He is my husband now and there are duties I must perform. Will I enjoy it? Can I enjoy it with a man like him?
“You will dance for our guests tonight,” he comments.
I blink. “I know we’ll have our first dance.”
“No. I mean you. You will dance yourself. I asked your mother to bring your pointe shoes to the wedding.”
My heart skips a beat. “But I’m not in the right dress.”
“You can still dance. You will show our guests why I wanted you.”
“But I’m not good enough.”
He raises an eyebrow, making me flush. “You have a passion inside of you, Lana. Buried deep down. I saw it the night you performed as Giselle. You didn’t miss the chance to be the lead, even though your competition was dead. I admire that drive. So why are you doubting yourself now?”
“Because everyone in my life has made it clear I am not a good enough dancer. I do not want to embarrass myself on my wedding day.” I raise my head higher.
“You would miss out on a chance to perform all because you’re worried about being embarrassed? That’s a shame.”
Nikolai’s comment makes me blush. He’s baiting me. I know that.
And it’s working.
“Fine,” I grit out. “I’ll do it. Any chance to dance is a good chance.” To be the star and I am the star today. I sigh.
“What is it?”
“It would just be better if my fellow ballerinas could see me. Especially Ana. I would love to rub it in her face.”
The dark smile that crosses his face makes me shiver. “You’ll show that girl who you really are soon enough. Don’t worry about that.”
We arrive at the reception hall held inside the beautiful ballroom of a five star hotel. Our guests are already here. Nikolai holds my hand as we enter inside. I can’t help but be aware of his touch on mine. It’s so… electric.
Our guests clap for us. It’s the sound of an applause I never got dancing as Giselle for the one and only time. All because Claudia died and took that from me.
I keep my ice princess face on. No one is going to see how worried I am tonight.
My eyes flick to Svetlana and I can’t help but think about her comment.
How Nikolai is going to leave me bloody.
How does she know that? Is she even telling the truth?
I have spent countless hours with backstabbing women so I know one when I see one. That doesn’t mean she’s lying though.
Nikolai is an enigma. He could do anything to me now that I belong to him.
He leads me onto the dance floor for our first dance. I’m hyperaware of his hand on my low back and his other hand enveloped around mine. I gasp when our bodies press together.
Nikolai’s smirk suggest he knows what he’s doing to me. “You’re a dancer, Lana. Surely you’ve danced with men before.” He leads me across the dance floor in a waltz.
“Not often. When I’m regulated to the corps de ballet, I tend to dance with other women. It’s mainly the leads who get to dance with the male dancers.”
“Maybe I shouldn’t want you to get a lead role then. I don’t like the idea of another man putting his hands on you.” His hand on my low back feels heavier.
“It’s just dance. It’s like acting. It’s not real.”
“I know. I’m not worried. You’re mine now. No one else’s.” His eyes flick down to my lips and back up. “Your father informed me that he never let you date but have you ever disobeyed him? Kissed a boy at your dance company? Or done more?”
“No,” I breathe out. “I was so focused on dance, nothing else mattered.”
“So innocent. That’s your problem, Lana. It’s why you struggle with your dance. You need to know life to be able to channel it in your art.”
“Are you going to show me what life is?”
Somehow, he brings us even closer together. “Yes. I am going to show you many things.”
I stumble in my high heels and I know our guests notice. I can feel the judgment from my mother. I’m supposed to be perfect in her eyes and I have failed again.
“Are you nervous?” Nikolai whispers into my ear.
“No,” I lie.
He pulls back and gives me a knowing look. How can he read me so well when we barely know each other? He’s had more time to observe me than I’ve had time to observe him. It’s not fair.
He brings our dance to a natural end and our guests politely clap for us. It’s all so formal. No cheers. No shouts. Nothing like I’ve seen in American movies. But this is Russia and people hold themselves with upturned noses. I shouldn’t expect anything else.
“Thank you all for coming,” Nikolai says, his voice booming through the room. “My wife is going to dance for us today.” He walks over to my mother who hands him my pointe shoes. I take them from him after a beat.
All the eyes of the people on me feels overwhelming in a way being on a stage has never felt. Because this is an entirely new stage. I wasn’t prepared for it.
“I need to put on my shoes and make an entrance,” I mumble before walking out of the ballroom. The moment I’m alone in the elegant hallway, I catch my breath. Why is my heart beating so fast?
The door to the ballroom opens and… Lev strolls out. Nikolai’s right hand. He walks right up to me.
“Hello,” I say, eyeing him warily. There’s an anger to his eyes I don’t like.
“Did you really think you could ensnare Nikolai like this?”
His question catches me off guard. “What?”
“Nikolai. You. I don’t trust you. I don’t trust your father. You have to be planning something to take Nikolai down and I will not stand for that. Not after everything I have worked hard for.”
“I am not planning to destroy Nikolai. I married him for peace between our families. I don’t appreciate your assumption.”
His laugh has no humor to it. “It’s not an assumption. I don’t trust girls like you. One’s who think they’re better than everyone else. I see the way you hold your nose up. The way you look down at everything and everyone. Don’t fuck with my boss, little girl. You will regret it.”
I roll my shoulders back and face Lev head on. Be the ice princess. “Why didn’t you say any of this in front of Nikolai and me earlier? Why only say this to me now when you have me all alone? It seems like a cowardly thing to do. A cowardly thing for a cowardly man.”
He slams his hand into the wall beside my head. I can’t help but flinch. “You will not ruin everything I have worked hard for.”
“And what have you worked so hard for?”
“I am Nikolai’s right hand. He was supposed to give me everything and now he’s married to you. You’ll get everything instead. I will not stand for it. Make sure you know your place, little girl. Or I will make you regret it.”
“Nikolai wants me. I don’t think he’d appreciate you trying to hurt me.”
Lev’s sneer is pure anger. “He’s not going to find out because you won’t tell him. I know you have two sisters who don’t have a mafia husband to protect them. You wouldn’t want one of them getting hurt, now would you?”
“No,” I answer, my spine stiffening. “I wouldn’t.”
“Good.” He backs away from me and I can breathe again. “So play the part of a good wife and only that. But if you try taking what I’ve worked for, you will regret it. And if you tell Nikolai about this, your sisters will not make it through the night.”
I watch Lev walk back into the ballroom as if nothing even happened. I have dealt with backstabbing bitches my entire life but I’m not prepared for dangerous mafia men. My father, despite being a mafia man himself, kept me fairly sheltered. Kept me fairly safe.
But now that I’m Nikolai’s, I’m cast out to see, on my own.