Chapter Two
Silas
I shouldn’t be here. I’d be an idiot if I didn’t understand how deranged this entire situation is. Ellie is my son’s ex-girlfriend, the one fucking person on the entire planet I should never look at with lust, and yet, I’ve spent the last two years jerking off to thoughts of her.
It has gotten unbearable. Hell, once I even jerked off in the truck while I watched her at the beach.
I wasn’t following her, but we both happened to be at the same place at the same time.
She was wearing a hot pink bikini that left nothing to the imagination.
To this day, I still think about the way her ass swallowed up that bottom and the way her tits bounced as she sprung up out of the water.
Which, again, is why I shouldn’t be here! I crossed one line at the beach, and I crossed another the night she and Adam broke up. Apparently, my morality loves hopscotch.
One would think that at the very least, I would start regretting the choices I make. Instead, I’ve spent the year ruminating on them, wishing I’d done more.
Take the night Ellie and Adam broke up, for instance. He got upset and backed her into a corner. I should have taken her away right then and there. Instead, I just grabbed Adam and forced him to calm down before making him leave my house.
I was addressing my son when I should have been focusing on her.
I knew she wanted me as badly as I wanted her.
I saw the way her eyes lingered on me in the hallway, in the way she leaned in when I spoke.
She wanted a man. A man who’d protect her, care for her, and touch her body like he knew what he was doing.
I could’ve been that for her.
It wasn’t until I went back to her that I saw the pain my decision caused.
At first, I tried consoling her. I held her against my chest, letting her tears soak my T-shirt.
I told her I’d always keep her safe, that I’d look out for her, that I’d never let Adam or anyone else hurt her.
I could tell my words were falling on deaf ears.
It was the light sigh she made as she buried into me further that broke me. That one tiny noise and the beast I’d been trying to suppress clawed its way to the surface and said things that shouldn’t have been said.
I drag in a deep breath and let it out slowly as I stand in the hallway, making small talk with her father. He’s best friends with my brother Cash, which means I’ve known the guy casually for the past twenty years, and well enough that he and his wife are trusting me with their daughter’s safety.
I can’t mess this up. I can’t let these urges get in the way of the trust these people have in me.
“She’s not afraid of anything.” Her father steadies a small ornate plate in his hand as he slices his fork sideways into the chocolate cake. “Her mother and I just want to know she’s safe. That’s all.”
I nod once, my arms crossed over my chest as I try to focus on him, rather than Ellie, who’s arguing with her mother in the next room. “You have my word. I’ll keep her safe.”
Her father nods. “This thing with the notebook… has Adam ever done anything like this before?”
“No.” I exhale slowly, wondering when my son fell off the tracks. “This is a first, but believe me, I won’t let anything happen to your daughter. She’s my top priority.”
Her father lands his hand on my shoulder. “I appreciate you. I know this is a difficult spot you’re in. I’m not sure I could do it.”
“Like I told Annabelle,” I scrub my hand down over my beard as I glance toward Ellie, who’s sitting at the dining room table rolling her eyes at her mother, “the last time I worked security was in the Marines, but given the circumstances, I see the importance. Adam isn’t acting like the kid I raised. He needs help.”
I never thought I’d say those words about my own son, but it’s true. He’s not the kid I raised. The kid I raised was tough but kind. He helped strangers and wounded animals on the side of the road. The kid I raised cared.
This guy is obsessive, and he doesn’t give a shit about anyone but himself.
“Do you know where he is?” her dad asks, scraping the edge of his fork against the plate to gather up the last of the chocolate frosting.
“Not currently, no. He ran off the night I found the notebook. Haven’t seen him since.
My guess is that he’s in the woods. I know he’d been building a place of his own, though I have no idea where.
From what I gathered by the designs and a checklist in the book, he seemed to be fairly far into it.
” I tilt my head to the side. “I’m not going to chase him down.
He’ll come to me and I’ll take care of him then. ”
“Man,” her dad shakes his head, still scraping at his plate, “are you sure you’re up for this?”
“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” I groan, my gaze drawing back toward Ellie as she stands, her little, round tits bouncing as she walks. I’d do anything for her, though given the look on her face, she isn’t yet convinced this is what she needs.
“Look,” she says, stepping into the space between her father and I, “I don’t know what these people are on, and I get that Adam has some weird notebook with ideas I should be worried about, but I don’t want a bodyguard.”
“This isn’t up for discussion,” her dad mutters. “It’s done. Mr. Wilder is here, and he’s offered his help. So, we’re taking it.”
She glances up at me, eyes wide. “Oh,” she pauses and crosses her arms over her chest as though she’s caught me in a lie, “he offered his help, did he?”
Her dad nods. “When he found that notebook, he called us up right away.”
“He did?” She continues to nod, her arms crossed, her nipples spiking through the thin sundress she wears.
This is going to be hell. I should’ve accounted for that.
“I need you to confirm,” she continues, “that this is Mr. Wilder’s idea?”
“No,” her mother flips her silver hair back over her shoulder and interjects before I get a chance to respond, “it’s mine.
I’ve been in contact with Mr. Wilder since you and Adam broke up.
I mentioned how uncomfortable I was with him following you around.
Silas did some investigating and found the notebook.
It’s not his fault, Ellie. He’s helping us.
Now mind your manners, get your bags, and get on your way. It’s getting late.”
Ellie’s chest rises and falls quickly. “What? I’m not leaving until morning.”
I clear my throat, guilt rolling through me as I see how steamrolled Ellie is feeling.
“Adam knows what car you drive. Some of the notes he’s taken lead me to believe he has some sort of tracker on you.
It’s best if you leave your car here and I drive you back to the mountain.
” My heart pounds at the thought of her sitting next to me in the truck, those thick thighs spilling out of that short dress while I try to maintain my composure.
Jesus Christ, I need to get my head right before I step out of this house. I need to erase any sexual thought of her. I’m not here to satiate some carnal, fucked-up part of me that’s lusting after my son’s ex. I’m here to keep her safe and to get Adam into treatment.
Ellie’s shoulders roll forward as though she’s contemplating defeat. “This is a mess. You all know that, right?”
No one speaks.
“Fine!” she snaps. “I’ll play the game for one week. After that, I’m doing things on my own.”
Adam has been missing for at least two weeks, so I doubt that’s enough time to settle all of this, but I can have that argument later. Right now, I’m just happy I don’t have to pick her up kicking and screaming.
“Let’s play this day by day.” Her father sets his plate down onto the kitchen counter as he says, “You listen to Silas and everything will be fine.”
A flash of her on her knees listening to me crowds my rational thinking.
“Listen to Silas?” She hides a Cheshire grin as she grabs her backpack by the front door. “Right.” I can’t tell by the tone if she’s disgusted by the thought. A year ago, I’d have told you without a shadow of a doubt she wanted me as badly as I wanted her. Now, I’m not so sure.
Not that it matters.
“I’ll text with necessary updates,” I say, opening the door for the girl I’m struggling not to touch, as I nod toward her parents. “Call me if you see anything worth noting.”
There’s a moment of goodbyes before the door closes shut, and I’m alone with the woman I’ve wanted to be alone with for far too long.
That said, I’ve made a vow to keep my hands to myself.
I’m not breaking it. She’s off-limits, and no matter how desperate my cock aches, I’m not giving in.
We’ve stayed apart for a year. We’ve done the hard work. I can’t mess it up now.
No more hopscotching the lines!
She tosses her backpack into the back seat of the truck and lets herself in before I can get to the door. I sense an aura of defiance, though there’s an independent streak in there too.
Once in the truck, she rests her pretty bare foot on my dash, her toenails painted a delicate pink. It’s cute and innocent, and there’s no fucking reason for me to imagine sliding them into my mouth one by one until she’s squirming, though it’s what my brain keeps screaming.
What the fuck? I’m spiraling!
“You’ve really got everyone under your spell, don’t you?” She weaves her fingers through her long dark hair and glances toward me as I take my place in the driver’s side of the truck.
“You say it like I sent Adam after you.”
She shrugs. “Did you?”
“No, Ellie,” I don’t bother glancing toward her, “but I wish I had. It would make this whole thing a lot easier.”
There’s silence for a moment. A time when the only thing between us is the scent of peach on her skin and the soft rise and fall of her breath.