Chapter 21 Seraphina
Seraphina
Ilay in the quiet dark, wrapped in the warmth of Thavros’s body while the storm raged in my own head.
His steady breathing behind me should have calmed me—it usually did.
But tonight, sleep wouldn't come. Not with the memories clawing at the edges of my mind like ghosts who’d finally remembered my name.
I could still feel his touch, his warmth, the way he wrapped around me, shielding me. His whispered declarations. The way he'd held me like I was the most precious thing he'd ever touched. Maybe that’s why the shame burned hotter now than ever.
Because what if he found out what I really was?
What if I already knew?
I rolled onto my back and stared up at the ceiling, barely lit by the firelight still burning in the fireplace. “Thavros,” I whispered, not even knowing if I meant to wake him or just hear the shape of his name on my lips. “I need to tell you something.”
Thavros shifted behind me, his hand immediately reaching, warm and steady, to find mine beneath the furs. “I’m here,” he murmured, voice thick with sleep but still entirely focused on me. “Always.”
That word, always, nearly broke me.
“I remember more,” I whispered, swallowing hard. “Not everything. Just... pieces. It’s like trying to grab mist. I can feel it all around me, but when I reach for it—” My voice cracked.
He moved beside me, pulling himself up so we were eye to eye. “Whatever it is, tell me,” he said, voice gentler than I deserved.
I took a breath, and the words came in a rush. “My mother was... she was divine. Aphrodite’s bloodline. But she died when I was little. My father was kind, but he—he gambled. He owed a debt to the Westerly Clan. When they found out what I was, they took me. As payment.”
Thavros' jaw clenched, but he didn’t speak. He simply listened, hand still holding mine like an anchor in the storm.
“I lived amongst the orcs and goblins of the Westerly Clan for years. I was provided for with food and shelter, but I was never cared for, never loved. They call me a gift,” I said bitterly. “But I wasn’t. I was leverage.”
I paused, unsure how to shape the next part into words that made any sense. “Things were… tolerable, at first. Strange, but not cruel. Then everything changed.”
Thavros's fingers tightened slightly around mine, a silent encouragement.
“I don’t remember what happened exactly. It’s like there is a veil of smoke over that time. But there was pain. Cages. Screaming that didn’t always come from me.” My breath hitched. “I think they did something to me, Thavros. I think they tried to turn me into something I’m not.”
His whole body stilled, but his presence never wavered. I couldn’t bear to look at him, not while saying this.
“I remember being told I had a purpose. That I was important, but it didn’t feel… right. Whatever I was supposed to do—it felt wrong.”
The dam finally broke.
“I don’t know what they did to me!” The words burst out as hot tears streamed down my face. “I don’t know what I was supposed to do, or why I was put here. And I’m terrified that whatever it is—it’s still inside me.”
Thavros caught me as I collapsed against him, sobbing. His arms wrapped around me like armor, like sanctuary. I buried my face in his chest, shaking.
“I don’t want to hurt anyone,” I whispered. “I just want to be myself again. If I even know who that is anymore.”
His grip never loosened. His heartbeat was steady beneath my cheek. And when he finally spoke, his voice was quiet but steady.
“You are not alone in this.”
Thavros shifted, turning so we were face to face, his hand rising to cradle my cheek. “Seraphina,” he said, his voice like stone warmed by fire. “Whatever they did, whatever purpose they tried to force on you, it is not who you are now. And it doesn’t get to define you.”
Tears blurred my vision again, but in time they came slower, steadier.
“You are not their weapon,” he said, firmer now, as his hands stroked my back. “You’re mine. Mine to protect. Mine to cherish. My heart, my purpose—Gods, Seraphina, I don’t care what brought you to the mountain. I only care that you’re here. With me.”
He leaned in, pressing his forehead gently to mine. “As long as I breathe, you’ll never face anything alone again.”
With those words, the fear began to ease. Not entirely vanish, but retreat, quieted by the certainty.
When I looked back up into his rich brown eyes, I felt a stirring in my soul I couldn't name.
He was mine as much as I was his. Somehow, whatever was happening between us was the only real thing in this world of smoke and mirrors.
I knew deep down that while I felt full of deception and chaos, Thavros felt real and safe.
I turn to him, cupping his face. My hands looked so dainty cupping his orc face. "I love you," I said, because it was the truest thing I knew to say.
His entire body sags in relief as he wraps his arms around, resting his head on my chest.
"I love you from the depths of my soul," he said as he held me close.
I ran my hands through his dark hair that was usually pulled back in a neat braid. I clung to him just as fiercely as he clung to me.
I needed him. With that acknowledgment, desire began to pool in my core.
I pulled his face up to mine, and I kissed him. This wasn't a tentative kiss or a playful kiss. No, this was a claiming kiss. I needed him. All of him.
I finally pulled back, "I need you," I said. My voice was filled with such desperation that I should be embarrassed, but I couldn't help myself. "I need all of you."
Thavros’s breath hitched the moment I said it, and then he surged forward, kissing me with a tenderness that belied his size and strength. My hands found the warm expanse of his chest, and I sighed against his lips, feeling the heat of him, the safety.
“Seraphina,” he whispered reverently. “Are you sure?”
“Yes,” I said, and I meant it. “I have never been more certain of anything in my life.”
As he helped me lie back, my body shivered in anticipation. His touch was slow and sure as he kissed a path down my neck, my shoulder, the curve of my breast. Every inch of me felt like it was waking up, coming alive under his mouth and hands.
He took his time. Worshipped me. Made me feel real and loved in a way nothing else ever had.
When his fingers slid between my legs, I gasped, already aching for him. But he didn’t rush.
He worked me slowly, first inserting only one thick finger as he slid his other finger around my clit.
My release was already building inside of me.
He was opening me with careful attention.
I broke on his hand with my first release as his deep, rumbling voice soothingly whispered how perfect I was, how soft, how beautiful.
"Give me one more, little flame. With this one, I will stretch out this cunt while I lick you," he said as he continued to work his fingers in and out.
He kissed down my neck and stopped to suck the peak of my nipple into his mouth before doing the same to the other.
I let out a long moan as he continued to kiss lower over the mound of my belly.
Then he added another thick finger as his tongue flicked over my clit.
I already felt so full, and then he scissored his fingers.
Pleasure was building again as he hit a spot deep inside of me.
He was there coaxing my pleasure out, steady and present and perfect.
"Thavros," I cried out, my hands fisting the sheets on either side of my waist.
He sucked my clit into his mouth, and I broke again. He stayed with me through each pulse. As I lay back on the blankets panting, he slipped his fingers out of me and pressed a tender kiss to my inner thigh. Then his gaze connected with mine, and he licked the slick from his fingers.
He moved to sit with his back against the bed as he stroked my side. "I think it would be best if you rode me first. That way, you first take me at your own pace. I do not wish to hurt you. I want you to feel nothing but pleasure."
"Sometimes there's a little bit of pleasure in the pain," I say, looking up at him through hooded eyes.
"There is, indeed, my little flame. Still, I want you in control this first time."
And when I was ready, when I needed him too much to wait another moment, I climbed onto his lap. I reached down and held his thick cock at my entrance, still unsure how this was going to work.
He let me guide him, the thick heat of him pressing at my entrance. I paused, breath catching.
“Just breathe,” he said. “I’ve got you.”
And he did. I sank onto him slowly, inch by inch, stretching to take him. My brows knit together in concentration. While my sex did sting from the stretch, the further I sank down, the more I was filled with the sensation of being deliciously full.
I kept going, kept rocking my hips, taking more and more of him.
When I finally did—when he filled me completely—I felt like I’d been made for this. For him.
For us.
Then I began to rock on him, feeling the delicious slide and stretch of his cock as I rose and fell. It was everything. It lit up places in my body I didn't know existed.
His hand slid between us as he worked my clit with his fingers. I relaxed even more, sliding even further down, taking him in.
I panted; it was all too much, but then that slight panic gave over to immense pleasure.
I closed my eyes and gave over to it, moaning as I lost control.
But he was right there, guiding my hips, taking care of me and my pleasure.
Then I collapsed onto him, my arms draped around his neck, holding him close.
Thavros’s eyes were molten as he looked down at me, still seated in his lap, his big hands curved around my hips like I was something precious.
“I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of you,” he murmured.
Before I could respond, he moved, effortless and sure. One moment I was straddling him, the next I was on my back, his massive frame looming over me, his mouth brushing mine as if in reverence.
“I'll be gentle, but I have to move,” he said.
I curled my fingers into his hair. “Yes. I want this. I want you.”
Whatever restraint he had been holding snapped.
He moved inside me in one long, slow thrust, and the stretch of him made me cry out. He groaned like he was breaking, burying his face in my neck as he paused, letting me adjust.
“Too much?” he rasped.
“No,” I breathed. “Don’t stop.”
And he didn’t.
He began to move—careful at first, then deeper, more insistent.
The tenderness never left his touch, but there was an edge of wildness to it, too.
Something uniquely orc. He kissed me like he couldn’t help himself, worshiped every part of me with his hands and mouth as his hips rocked into mine, finding a rhythm that set fire to every nerve.
Each thrust sent shivers through my bones. Each word—beautiful, mine, perfect—carved itself into my soul.
I could feel it building deep inside of me again.
I was going to come again. I reached down between us, squeezing his knot, which was the only part of him not inside of me.
I was overwhelmed. Overwhelmed by him, by pleasure, by sensation.
I gave over to him, to the pleasure, going rigid as I came again.
He followed, roaring my name like it was a promise.
And even though no magic flared, no bond sealed, I felt it in my heart.
I was his. And somehow, impossibly, he was mine.
The room was quiet, save for the ragged sound of our breathing slowly evening out. Thavros’s skin was warm against my cheek, his heart pounding steady and strong in his chest.
His arms wrapped around me like a shield, and I let myself melt into him.
I had no answers. No certainty about what I’d been sent to do, or who I might have become under their control. But in this moment, wrapped in him, I wasn’t a weapon. I was just… loved.
He slipped from me, and I ached for him to fill me again, but as he moved, his release began to drain from me. It had felt like a lot while it was happening, but now it was pooling around me. He got out of bed to clean up. He returned with a cloth to clean me up and fresh blankets for the bed.
Luckily, he took care of everything, because my legs couldn't have held me up if I tried.
Once he had everything sorted, he settled back into bed with me. I turned into him instantly, resting my head on his chest as I traced my fingers along his cool skin.
"Are you in pain? There is a salve I can prepare," he said before pressing a kiss to the top of my head.
"No. I feel good. There is an ache between my legs," I looked up into his deep eyes. "But I like it."
He sighed as a contentment rumbled deep in his chest. We lay there for a long, quiet moment, basking in the newfound love we had for each other. Although I'm not sure how newly found it was. Part of me felt like I had always loved him, like I had always known he was mine.
That thought allowed the dread to return. The what-ifs began to creep in. What if I had been sent here for a purpose that would hurt all these wonderful orcs who were becoming dear to me? What if I hurt Thavros? I could not bear that thought.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, not even sure why. For the silence. For the secrets. For being afraid.
His lips brushed my temple. “There’s nothing you ever need to be sorry for. You’re mine. And I’ve got you.”
I swallowed hard, throat thick with emotion. “Even if I break?”
“You won’t,” he said fiercely. “But even if you did, I’d put you back together.”
Tears slipped down my cheeks. “I think I was made for you.”
“I know you were.”
He pulled the furs over us, curling his massive frame around mine. My eyelids grew heavy, but sleep didn’t scare me tonight. Not with him holding me. Not with this new ache between my ribs, something like hope. Or the ache between my legs, that felt like love.
Tomorrow would come with its questions and its shadows.
But for tonight, I was warm. I was safe.
I was his.