Chapter Thirty-Two Nathan
Chapter Thirty-Two
Nathan
[The pilot] has to be part of the machine. If he thinks of anything but the task in hand, then trouble is probably just around the corner.
—AMELIA EARHART
If love is wanting the best for someone even when it’s not the best for you, then I never loved Joey. I liked how Joey made me feel. I craved her attention. I prided myself on the way heads turned when we walked into a room. It was all about me.
For Claire, I surrendered.
I didn’t want to. I wanted to wipe her tears away. I wanted to rub a thumb over her bottom lip. I wanted to pull her to me, nuzzle her temple, and feel our hearts beat together.
But that’s not my right. That would be tempting her to be unfaithful in the very way her boyfriend accused. If she could give into such temptations, it would feed the fears of infidelity I already battle. Especially were we ever to become a couple.
Wyatt’s suspicions may have been influenced by his past experience, the way mine had been, but he also must have sensed my attraction to his girlfriend.
So I step back even further than I had before.
I gave Claire the encouragement Joey needed when I was in Wyatt’s shoes, and now I watch through the window of the airport as her plane disappears into the gray clouds.
Vincent pauses beside me, following my gaze out the window. “What are we looking at?”
I’m not in the mood for his advice, but I could use his compassion. “Claire was on that plane.”
Vincent rocks back on his heels, then turns toward me. “No kidding?” He’d ridden in the flight deck jump seat to allow a standby passenger to make it onto the flight, so he hadn’t seen Claire walk down the aisle or heard her announcements. “How’s she doing in SFO?”
I answer with a dry laugh. It’s too tragic to tell anyone how her boyfriend accused her of cheating with me before I supported her in saving their relationship.
“That good, huh?”
“I wished her well.” I press my lips together. “Now I’m not sure what to do, because I bought all new furniture at a Black Friday sale, it arrives tomorrow, so I can’t keep remodeling. I don’t have any more walls in my house to knock down.”
Vincent grips my shoulder. “I know someone who can use your home improvement skills.”
I glance over. “Are you remodeling?”
He hoots in laughter. “Not me. But a mutual friend of ours is building homes for the homeless.”
I huff at the reminder that some people have it worse than I do. My free time would be much better spent focusing on serving them rather than on my own misfortune. “Win-win.”
Vincent gestures toward the center walkway. “Come on. There’s more for you.”
With a parting glance toward the stormy sky, I follow. Perhaps he’s right. This could be the hard lesson that turns me into the kind of man who will truly find love in the future.
Strangely, I’m in no rush anymore. I don’t just want a wife—I want the kind of marriage where we build each other up and have more to offer the world as a team. Then when everything goes wrong, and it absolutely will, simply looking into her eyes will be enough.
That’s rare. That’s worth waiting for. That’s what my father found with Sarah. My dad’s remarriage that once felt so hurtful to me now offers me hope.
“Hey, did I tell you I met my three little brothers on Thanksgiving?”
“What?” Vincent’s voice booms. “You’d better invite them all for Christmas. I need to meet this family of yours.”
I shake my head at myself. I already have more family than I ever realized.