Chapter 54
Chapter Fifty-Four
T he room I awoke in was familiar and foreign at the same time. I clutched the bedcovers to my chest as I scanned my surroundings, getting my bearings. The room was large, dark, and moody. Beyond sheer curtains, floor-to-ceiling windows framed a decadent view of the city.
This was Neil’s bed, in Neil’s bedroom.
The memories of last night came flooding back all at once, my body tingling with the echoes of Neil’s passion. After our tryst in my apartment, we had relocated here because Neil didn’t want to leave his pets home alone all night.
I drew in a stunned breath as I turned my view to the man beside me. He lay on his stomach, face half-mashed into a pillow, one arm curled beneath his head. The other arm was slung over my hips in a possessive hold. His bare, muscular back rose and fell with each breath. I smiled, drinking in the rare, unguarded sight of him. I stroked my fingertips over his shoulder blade, which made him grunt, eyelids fluttering. For a second, I wondered if I had woken him, but he nuzzled further into his pillow without opening his eyes.
As much as I wanted to stay and snooze next to him, my bladder had other ideas. I extricated myself from under Neil’s heavy arm and slid from the bed, then padded to the ensuite. I caught my reflection in the mirror as I entered. Oof . Limp hair, smudged mascara, blotchy complexion. A far cry from alluring. I splashed cool water on my face and raked my fingers through my messy hair to revive myself.
When I left the bathroom, I paused at the sound of scratching coming from the bedroom door. Huh? What is that? I hurried over to investigate. As I cracked open the door, two inquisitive feline faces peered up at me.
I should have known.
“Shhh,” I whispered, slipping into the hallway and pulling the door almost closed behind me. But it was too late. The cats darted between my ankles and into the bedroom before I could stop them. I grimaced as Chichi leapt onto the bed and strutted up Neil’s body, meowing in his ear.
“No, Chichi!” I tried to shoo her away. “Let Daddy sleep.”
Neil stirred with a sleepy grunt. Dark lashes flitted open, blinking up at the cat now kneading his pillow. “Attention seeker,” he huffed, giving Chichi’s ears an affectionate scratch. Then his gaze settled on me. The unrestrained tenderness in those inky irises made my muscles feel weak. Suddenly shy, I hugged my arms around myself.
“Good morning,” Neil said, his voice gravelly from sleep.
I climbed into bed next to him and pulled the sheet up to cover myself, sitting up against the headboard. “I tried to keep her out. Sorry she woke you.”
“Don’t be. This is my preferred wake-up call—and with you here, all the better.” He sidled up to me. “You’re not a dream, are you?”
“Definitely not a dream. My bedhead and morning breath couldn’t be more real.”
Neil chuckled. “I think you’re gorgeous. However…” His gaze dropped to my sheet-covered chest. “I would prefer you without the modesty act.”
I gave his shoulder a playful swat. “Neil! Your children are watching.”
He bellowed an even heartier laugh, scrubbing a hand through his dishevelled hair. Next to him, Chichi continued to knead the pillow. At the foot of the bed, Bowey stared balefully up at us.
“I think they want breakfast,” I said.
“Yes, apologies, Your Highness,” Neil said to Chichi. He glanced at the glowing digits of the bedside clock. “It’s past their usual mealtime.”
“I’ll feed them.”
“Are you sure?”
I nodded. “I’m fully awake now. You can have a snooze.”
Neil acquiesced with a sigh, sinking back against the pillows.
I pulled on the change of clothes I had brought with me the night before, then headed to the kitchen. Both cats twined figure-eights around my ankles, their mews growing more insistent.
I poured cat biscuits into two bowls decorated with paw prints. Chichi and Bowey immediately attacked the food, their crunching filling the silence. Smiling to myself, I peeked inside the cupboard by the fridge until I located the dog kibble.
Now, where’s Archie?
I found the old dog curled up in his plaid dog bed, snoring gently. He lifted his grizzled head at my approach, tail sweeping back and forth across the tiles.
“There you are,” I crooned, giving him a good scratch behind the ears. “Are you hungry too?”
He gave a throaty woof, his back end rising to stand. I refilled his water and food bowls, then gave him belly rubs as he munched away.
When I straightened, strong arms encircled me from behind. I yelped, then melted back against Neil’s bare chest, my heartbeat galloping. He pressed a smiling kiss below my ear. “The bed got cold,” he murmured into the crook of my neck.
“Well, we can’t have that…”
He was wearing nothing but his boxers, his body warm against my back. Archie gave a disgruntled huff around his mouthful of kibble. Neil turned me in his arms until I faced him. Desire simmered in his heavy-lidded gaze as he studied my face. Then he dipped his head and caught my lips in a long, lush kiss that curled my toes. I looped both arms around his neck, heat swooping low in my stomach. We stumbled backwards until my tail bone hit the kitchen bench. I could feel his arousal pressing against me.
“Let’s go back to bed,” he said.
I nodded, my mouth too dry to respond.
He led me to the bedroom, lowered me onto the bed, then his lips were on mine, hard and impassioned. I wrapped my legs around his waist, pulling him close. He reached a hand under me, squeezing my backside as he lifted my hips to press even closer. We moved together, mashing and grinding through the building heat and friction between us. Neil’s movements became increasingly frenetic. He attacked my waistband, pulled down my pants, then tugged at my underwear. He only got them halfway down my thighs before he was fumbling to put a condom on, then burrowing into me with desperate little thrusts. I wriggled and rutted, urging him on.
”Slow down,” Neil whimpered.
But I couldn’t. ”No. Please, don’t stop.”
His grip on my hips tightened, fingers digging in. I felt him swell inside me, then he spasmed hard, groaning. He kept going for as long as he could before rolling off me, heaving deep breaths. “Sorry,” he said, grimacing. “I’m out of practice. Easily excitable and overstimulated.”
That I could have such an effect on him pleased me more than anything. “Don’t be sorry. I loved it.”
“C’mere.”
He beckoned me into his open arms. I lay my cheek against his chest while his hands trailed patterns over my back and sides, tracing every dip and curve as if committing my shape to memory. I still couldn’t quite believe this was real.
“How long have you liked me?” I asked through a haze of sleepy contentment.
“Since I first met you. Though I didn’t realise quite how much until I caught you in my home, and I wanted you to belong here. With me.”
“I thought you couldn’t stand me?—”
“Never. I was just angry at myself for wanting you.”
I recalled our early interactions and his prickly demeanour. The thought of him secretly pining for me that whole time gave me a thrill.
“What about you?” he asked, stroking my hair. “When did you start liking me?”
I had a think for a second. It was difficult to pinpoint a precise moment. “When you pulled me out of the way of the splash from the bus going past. But you’ve always intrigued me. I just couldn’t admit it to myself.”
“Intrigued? Tell me more.”
“You know what I mean. You can be quite charming sometimes—when you’re not being an insufferable tyrant.”
Neil chuckled, his chest rumbling beneath me.
“And your laugh is the best laugh I’ve ever heard in my life.”
“I didn’t know it was anything special.”
“Oh, it is.”
“Then feel free to make me laugh more often.”
“I will.”
I sighed, his steady heartbeat thrumming under my ear. If only we could stay suspended in this perfect bubble of intimacy forever, shut away from the outside world. But reality beckoned.
Neil drew back, his eyes crinkling. “What would you like for breakfast? I can pick something up.”
My stomach rumbled at the suggestion of food. “Oooh. Yes, please. Anything’s fine.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’ll come with you?—”
“No, you won’t.”
His short reply was a stark reminder that there would be stipulations to this relationship. He clearly didn’t want to be seen buying breakfast with me on a Saturday morning. I understood why.
“Of course. Sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”
He pressed a kiss to my lips in lieu of an apology before sliding out of bed. I propped myself up on one elbow, admiring the view as he walked to the ensuite.
After Neil had showered and dressed, he kissed me goodbye. “Make yourself at home while I’m gone. I’m taking Archie with me for a walk, but he gets tired quickly, so I won’t be long.”
“Take your time.”
I heard the click of paws on the floorboards, excited doggy whimpers, and the jangling of a leash on Neil’s way out of the apartment.
While Neil was gone, I hopped in the shower. The rainfall fixture felt heavenly beating on my shoulders. As I lathered up with soap, I recalled what Neil had confessed to doing in this very shower. Just thinking about it made me flush all over. I had to run the cold water for a second to recover.
Freshly scrubbed and wrapped in a robe I found hanging on the back of the door, I made my way to the kitchen. I had just figured out Neil’s high-tech coffee machine when the front door opened. Archie trotted inside panting, his leash trailing behind him. Right on his heels, Neil strode in, holding a fragrant white paper bag. My mouth watered at the scent.
Neil’s eyes trailed over me. “Wearing my robe?”
I tightened the tie across my waist. “You don’t mind, do you?”
“I might as well give you free rein of my wardrobe at this point.”
“Yes, please.”
Neil huffed but couldn’t hide his amusement.
“What did you get?” I asked. ”Smells amazing.”
“See for yourself.”
He slid the bag across the counter. I eagerly opened it to reveal two glossy bagels—one loaded with egg and melted cheese, the other glistening with sweet cinnamon cream cheese and fresh strawberry slices. My stomach gave an impatient rumble as I reached for two plates from the cupboard.
“I’ll hazard a guess that you would prefer the sweet one,” Neil said.
“Correct,” I said, plating both bagels. “Good guess.”
Neil grinned. “Oh yes, terribly difficult to deduce.”
I stuck my tongue out at him and took an enormous bite, closing my eyes to savour the burst of flavours—the doughy bagel base, the sweet and tangy cream cheese, the ripe juicy strawberries… “Oh wow. This is incredible.”
“Don’t talk with your mouth full.”
I cracked one eye open to find Neil regarding me with undisguised affection beneath the stern reprimand.
“Yes, sir,” I said.
Neil just shook his head.
We settled at the dining table with our bagels and coffee. As much as I enjoyed chowing down on breakfast, Neil’s increasing solemnity didn’t escape my notice. He cleared his throat as if gearing up to say something serious. I stiffened.
“I think we should discuss the, er, developments between us,” he said.
My stomach dropped. I always knew this was coming—I wasn’t stupid. But still…
I fidgeted with my almost-empty coffee mug, unsure how to respond.
Neil must have noticed my dejected body language, because he placed his hand over mine. “Don’t worry. I know my situation is complicated, but I want this to work. More than anything. Okay? This isn’t just a fling to me.”
I turned my palm up beneath his, lacing our fingers. “I want this to work too.”
His thumb stroked my knuckles. “But if we’re going to keep seeing each other, discretion is key. I’m sure you understand why.”
“Because you’re still my boss, and because you don’t want Daniel to find out about us in case it puts me in danger.”
Neil’s jaw tightened at the mention of his nemesis’s name. “Yes. So we have to keep this a secret, at least until the Zelthia situation reaches its endgame.”
“There’s something I don’t understand. Daniel already thought we were sleeping together, and it didn’t matter then, so why does it matter now?”
“Because for a man like Daniel, you can fuck someone without having feelings for them. In other words, I’m not concerned if he thinks we’re sleeping together. What I don’t want him to know is how much I care about you.”
The reason was more simple than I thought it would be, and it made complete sense. And Neil cares about me…
“Okay, I think I get it. But none of this matters if Daniel doesn’t find out that you’re scheming to oust him, does it?”
Neil nodded. “He’s definitely suspicious that something’s going on, but beyond that, I don’t think he has anything concrete against me. I just want to be cautious. Once the dust settles on the succession, that’s when we can tell people about us.”
“Any idea how long that might take?”
Neil exhaled through his nose. “Could be months, a year… longer. There are a lot of moving pieces.”
My heart sank, but I tried not to let the disappointment show on my face. I understood Neil’s need for discretion, but the thought of sneaking around for ages, only catching fleeting moments with him, twisted my insides in knots. Then there was my impending trip to Europe, throwing further complications into the mix.
“Trust me, Milly, it kills me to have to act like you’re some kind of dirty little secret. You deserve so much better than this. I wouldn’t blame you for backing out right now. Do you want to?”
I shook my head. “I’m prepared to go through with this.”
“I know it’s not much of a consolation, but we can still see each other freely within this building. We can trust my security team here.”
I nodded, buoyed by this compromise. “Oh, good. But what about work? You’re not going to make me quit, are you?”
Neil shook his head. “You were right before. You leaving will look more suspicious than not, plus I’d prefer to keep you within arm’s length. But we’ll have to be careful. I ask that you keep your conduct strictly professional. I’ll do the same.”
“Even when we’re alone in your office?”
“Even then. After the spying incident, I won’t risk anything.”
“Good point.”
“And soon enough, you’ll be leaving, anyway. Off on your big OE.”
I nibbled my lip. Given the changed circumstances of our relationship, I hated the thought of putting an ocean between us so soon. “About that. Are you still sure you want me to go?”
“Yes. It will give me peace of mind knowing you’re far from Daniel’s reach. I’ll rest easier at night.”
“And you’ll wait for me to come back?”
He squeezed my hand. “Yes, I will. And when that happens, hopefully all of this will have blown over. But if you can’t wait that long, I’d understand. Or if you meet someone else?—”
“I can wait! I’ll wait however long it takes. And there’s no one except you. I can’t even comprehend wanting to be with anyone else but you.”
Neil’s posture relaxed, his hunched shoulders deflating. “As tough as it was, I’m glad we had this talk.”
“Me too.”
“Good. Because I don’t ever want to upset you.” He clasped my hand between both of his.
I looked up at him through my eyelashes. “You said we can still see each other here in this building…”
“Yes, as long as we don’t make a show of ourselves in the corridors and lobby.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it! Well, actually, I would, but I’ll refrain.”
“You were saying?”
“Right. So… Can I stay here with you this weekend?”
Neil grinned. “I was hoping you’d ask that.”