Chapter 18 #3
“Jesus Christ, Connor. You’re so self involved sometimes. I made the goddamn report,” Nate snapped.
Connor fell silent.
“What are you talking about?”
“It was after he got all up on my ass about the Barnum redistribution. Remember when I sent you out?”
Connor didn't say anything, but Nate kept talking. Nate always did that.
“He was starting on me about firing you. He’s wanted me to fire you since I started. You know what he said about you? Don’t trust Hayes. Don’t let him sit in on meetings, don’t show him your email. He’ll end your career before it even starts. And I knew it was bullshit, but he wouldn’t let it go."
Connor hear the words Nate was saying, but he couldn't make sense of them.
"He brought you in to get rid of me."
It wasn't a question. But Nate answered like it was.
"He never said that straight out, just talked about restructuring. Hiring two assistants, ironclad NDAs. But what he wanted was clear and I liked you and–and I didn’t want to do that.”
Connor chewed his bottom lip.
“Why’d you show him my proposal?”
The silence that followed must have lasted close to a minute before Nate finally answered.
“I’m sorry.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
“I felt backed into a fucking corner, okay. He was coming at me for the Barnum deal and he was coming at me for you and I couldn’t get his attention off you.
I thought, okay, if I show him this, maybe he'd lay off you for a bit. And he just–I never would have done it if I knew, Connor. I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.”
Connor didn’t speak–he didn’t know if he could speak.
But Nate had always been good at filling silences between them, and that’s exactly what he did now.
“I lost control of it so fast, Connor. And then he kept fucking–he kept saying it was me, it was my work.” Nate laughed hoarsely.
“We both know I could never do what you do. And then you came in and he was right back to–right back on his Fire Hayes mission. And you left and… and I tried to find you but you were just gone. I tried to find you in that app. Nothing. And then your email came about your brother–right, you don’t have a brother. ”
Nate’s voice only wavered a little, but it was enough.
“My dad wanted to fire you right when your email came in. ‘Job abandonment’, he called it. I refused. I told him, I told him he was going to have to fire me before he fired you. And I guess I meant something to him, or I did at the time, because he actually let it go. And I felt like, okay, I won. I’ll give you your space, and when you come back, everything will be the way it was.
“And then all of a sudden, I’m getting pulled into HR. And they’re talking to me about these documents that were supposed to have my signature on them, but they were saying it wasn’t my signature. That someone tipped them off that you were impersonating me.”
“I wasn’t.”
“Jesus, Connor. Let me finish. I know it wasn’t you, because I signed everything they were showing me.”
Nate laughed a hollow, angry laugh.
“I guess he was trying from another angle, you know. So I played his own game right back. I reported him for exploiting his position. Now it’s an investigation. All he cares about is trying to preserve his own career, he hasn’t bothered trying to throw you under the bus yet.”
Connor could hardly believe what he was hearing. It was one thing to hear it from Junie–in his corner no matter what, her fingers in the many pies of the rumor mill that fueled Alarie–but hearing this from Nate was something else entirely.
“And you?” He asked.
“Your name isn’t going to come up.”
“Why, though?”
“Why, what, Connor?”
“Why not screw the guy you’ve been seeing for–what, two months?”
“I don’t get what you’re asking.”
“Yeah, you do,” Connor said cooly. “Is this some kind of… what, ploy? So you can be the good guy? You can be the hero here?”
“Ever consider not everyone’s trying to cut you down–you know, just so they can make themselves a little taller by climbing on your corpse?” Nate said, his voice tight.
Connor was quiet for a moment.
“That’s dark, Nate.”
“Yeah? Try this. Even my own father is getting ready to make me his whipping boy. And I can’t do that to anyone else, especially not you.”
Connor didn’t have anything smart to say to that.
“Why, because you’re sleeping with me?” He asked hollowly.
“Because I like you. Jesus–I liked you the moment I met you. I saw you and I thought, here I am in California, and here’s this guy who looks like he comes right out of the movies, all Wolf of Wall Street with your suit and the way nothing made you flinch.
And when you told me you’d be my assistant, I mean–I knew then, that was wrong.
That was fucked up. It should have been the other way around.
I knew it, you knew it, and–and you didn’t screw me.
You could have. You should have. I mean, I don’t understand why you didn’t. ”
Connor closed his eyes. He knew why he hadn’t.