Thirty-Four
OREN
I miss the chalet already. We’ve been home for like two days and I miss the serenity.
It felt and looked like we were in a completely different world.
I haven’t reinstalled the social media apps because I appreciate not having to cringe with anxiety every time I turn on my phone.
I’m sure that my brother is still spewing shit, but I don’t want to hear it. Or see it.
Besides the chalet, Adak’s house is probably one of the most beautiful, comfortable places I’ve ever been.
There’s this sense of welcome and home that I’ve never felt anywhere before.
And while I try to remind myself that everything happening in the outside world doesn’t touch me here, being back is just a reminder of real life.
My father’s murder. My brother’s nastiness—even if it is barely readable.
As my feet hit the landing, my phone rings and I pause to pull it out. Most of my friends just text unless it’s urgent, so my stomach twists at what new thing they could be calling to tell me this time.
Except, it’s not one of my friends. It’s Haze.
There’s a moment where I hesitate to answer. Unsure of why he could be calling. Did Dane or Frankie convince him to let them use his phone when I didn’t respond to their messages? Chewing my lip, I decide that I’m sure that’s not the case.
I answer, but say nothing.
“Oren?” Haze says.
I can hear movement. Road noise? Yep, that was a horn.
“Yes,” I say without pointing out that he called me. He should know who he’s calling.
Haze sighs. It’s a heavy sound. “I’m calling to tell you… I’m leaving.”
“Leaving?” I repeat.
“Yeah. My friends and I transferred to Eastern State in Arizona. I’ve already packed my car and I’m heading there now.”
“For summer?” I ask. That’s not the question I actually want to ask.
He laughs quietly, but it doesn’t sound happy.
“Oren, I’m sorry. For all the years I didn’t say or do anything to protect you.
Or give you support. Sometimes I tried, mostly once you left the room, but they’d just laugh and tell me not to get involved.
Don’t worry about it. I didn’t know what to do, Oren.
It was cowardly and wrong, but I didn’t want that kind of treatment to be turned onto me. ”
I nod and shrug, though he can see neither, and say “I get it.” I’ve moved into the entry now and find that I’m staring outside the window next to the front door.
“I don’t blame you.” There are two cars parked on the road in front of Adak’s house.
The neighbor across the street is in her yard tending to her flowers, and there’s another car parked on the road on the opposite side of the street two houses down.
It's quiet. Peaceful. A perfect neighborhood.
“The thing is, I knew how shitty it was,” Haze says. I swear, I hear tears in his voice. “I hated everything they did to you, but I… just couldn’t bring myself to get in the middle of it. The guilt and shame because of it is… a lot. I’m so sorry, Oren.”
Okay, now I’m sure he’s crying. “Is that why you’re leaving?” I ask.
“Yes and no. I’ve hated living there, probably as long as you have for the same and yet different reasons.
I hated how they treated you and since you finally got out, it’s been…
ugly. Uglier. Which I know is hard to believe.
You should hear the things they say. No, actually, I’m really glad you haven’t had to.
Then Dad was killed and the things Dane and Frankie—Frankie especially—rant about make me sick to my stomach.
I can’t stay there. It’s not safe or healthy. ”
“I’m glad you’re leaving, Haze.”
I absently watch the neighbor across the road as she digs in the flowerbeds. It looks almost therapeutic. Maybe we should get some flowers.
“Yeah, so five friends and I are moving. My transfer was the last to go through, but it was just accepted, so since Dane and Frankie are out of the house, I packed my shit while they weren’t there and took off.
I’m stopping to meet my friends at Honey Bee’s, and then we’re all driving to Arizona together. ”
“Do you have money? Do you need any?” I’m not sure what prompts me to ask but I do.
“I’m good, Oren. But thanks. I’ve been working at school for the past couple years.
It’s not a lot, but it’s definitely enough to get me to Arizona.
We’ve rented a house in a really nice, fancy neighborhood close to the college.
It’s cheap because Oakley’s mom’s cousin’s barber’s vet or something owns it, and after hellish experiences with renting, she’s happy to put trustworthy college students in it. ”
I can hear his amusement and smile.
“I’ve changed my major too. To something Dad would hate.”
This time I laugh. “Yeah?”
“Yep. Fine Arts. I’m likely not going to stick with it because my art is shit, but it’s just that ‘fuck you’ I want to put out into the universe right now, you know?”
I sigh. “Yep, I know.” I turn away from the window and move back into the house. “I’m glad you’re getting out of there, Haze. You never needed to apologize but thank?—”
My words are cut off as a blast from outside knocks me off my feet and I tumble to the ground. My phone goes flying, slamming to the floor and sliding away. I scream as another explosion outside breaks the windows and glass rains through the air like hail.
“OREN!”
I try to get up, but a third explosion follows on the heels of the second, keeping me down as the house shakes. Adak’s hands grip me, hauling me to my feet and then we’re inside the small half bath and crouching on the floor between the vanity and the wall.
Needless to say, I’m shaking like a leaf.
“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Adak asks.
Before I can answer, the house alarm begins to blare. It’s so fucking loud my teeth rattle.
What just happened? Were bombs dropped in Anaheim? Are we in a war that I didn’t know about? Fear moves through me like ice and I bury myself in Adak’s hold, squeezing my eyes shut.
I’m not sure how many minutes or hours pass, but eventually, we’re pulled to our feet by paramedics and taken out of the house.
Outside, it truly looks like a war zone and I’m fucking terrified.
There are heaps of twisted metal in front of our house.
Our house isn’t the only one with the alarm going off, either; plus several cars along the street.
While I’ve never experienced shock, I’m fairly certain I must be in shock. Everything around me is moving slowly, and yet, I can’t keep up with the movements. Like people are flitting about. The sounds are too loud and yet I’m hearing them through a tunnel.
“It’s all right,” Adak says through it all, my head pressed to his chest. We’re at an awkward angle, but I can’t seem to get closer. I grasp onto him desperately, trying to keep him close. Refusing to let him get away. “Shh. I’m right here. Everything is okay. I promise.”
His promise soothes me. I trust him. If Adak says it’s okay, then it is. I settle into his chest and close my eyes, trying to make it all fade away.
I wake up in the hospital and immediately panic. Ohmigod, Adak’s hurt! But as I try to jump up, I realize I’m the one in a hospital bed. Adak is there immediately and shushing me while gently urging me to lay back.
“What happened?” I ask.
“Car bombs,” Adak answers. “Lori across the road is seriously injured. Luckily, no one else was.”
“Me?” I ask, eyes wide as I try to figure out why I’m in the hospital bed.
His hands move over my face. “No, sweetheart. You have a bunch of surface lacerations from the shards of glass that flew through the air. Otherwise, you just passed out from shock. We’ll leave as soon as the doctor comes back, now that you’re awake.”
I collapse against him, closing my eyes tightly. “We can’t go home, can we?”
“Jack’s suggesting we stay in a hotel for a few nights. But I’ve spoken to Rake and I think we’ll stay in L.A. with them for a bit. If that’s okay with you?”
I nod. “The cars parked on the street. Those were the car bombs?”
Adak nodded. “You saw them?”
“Yeah, I was just looking out the window. I was thinking about how therapeutic gardening must be as I watched the neighbor in her flowers.”
A knock on the door had us both looking up. Lieutenant Jack stepped in; he smiled at me and, for some reason, I relaxed.
“How’re you feeling, Oren?”
“Terrified. You?”
He chuckles. “Listen, were you on the phone when the bombs were detonated?”
“I didn’t do it!” I say indignantly.
Jack holds up his hands. “I know, I know. That’s not why I’m asking.”
“I… oh. Yes, I was talking to my brother.” I pause before adding, “My little brother. Haze.”
“He’s been calling the station panicking since. You should call him.”
“Oh my god, he heard the explosions,” I say, cringing.
“And you screaming. I can only imagine what he’s thinking right now.”
“Okay, thanks. Did someone tell him I’m alive?”
“I did. Three times. I’m not sure he believes me, since I couldn’t let him talk to you.”
“I’ll call him.”
“We’ll escort you to your house to pack your bags. You’ve made arrangements for somewhere else tonight?”
Adak nods. “Yes, we’re going to stay with my nephew for a few days out of the city.”
Jack nods. “Any word from your security company?”
“Yes, actually.” He pulls out his phone and pulls up a clip. Instead of handing it to Jack, he shows me. It shows the three cars pulling down the street together and parking, a fourth stalling in the middle of the road for the guys to get out of the parked cars and climb in before driving off.
I pull the phone from him and rewind the clip. “That’s Frankie,” I say, my blood turning cold. “That one. Right there.”
“Do you recognize the others?” Jack asks as he steps beside the bed.
It’s hard to look away from Frankie. The sight of him, knowing he parked the car out front of Adak’s house, intending to blow it up…
it hurts. Maybe it shouldn’t, but the way it makes my chest tight and brings tears to my eyes…
it fucking sucks. That’s my brother. I can’t believe he hates me so much that he’d try to hurt me.
I watch the clip no less than a dozen times before shaking my head. “I’m not sure if Frankie ever brought someone home,” I say. “If he did, it wasn’t while I was there or he didn’t bring them in the house. I don’t know who they are.”
“I’ll forward you the clip,” Adak tells Jack.
When I’m released half an hour later, I call Haze. He’s a wreck, and I can hear a girl in the background.
He’s had the same friends since grade school, but I’ve only seen them a few times. I know their names because Haze used to talk about them when we were kids. So I’m guessing the girl in the background sounding like she’s buzzing with nerves is Honey Bee. I’m not even sure I know her real name.
I feel better once I talk to Haze. His concern for me rivals what I feel must be the realization of Frankie’s hate. He promises me that they’re leaving as soon as we get off the phone. He and his friends are leaving California and never coming back.
He asks me to do the same.
When the call ends, we’ve already left Adak’s house and are on the road to Rake and Egon’s in L.A.
It was surprisingly difficult being back there.
So many houses have windows and doors boarded up from the damage.
The cars have been hauled off, but there are still huge burn marks and scars from the explosions in the road and on lawns.
Ours obviously took the brunt of it, since there were two parked right out front.
“Oren?”
I take a deep breath to get my nerves under control and look at Adak. “You okay?”
I nod. “Yeah.”
He reaches over and grips my hair tightly. “I don’t mean your injuries. Are you okay?”
A smile touches my lips. “Yes. I’m just… still processing that my brother did that.”
Adak nods. We stop at a light and he looks at me. Taking my hand in his, he kisses the back of it. “I think we need to leave California too,” he says.
Haze had been on speaker phone for the last half of the call, so Adak could hear him. I’m not sure why I wanted to share that with him, but I needed to.
“Okay,” I say. “Where should we go?”
“I’m going to take Carolina’s offer,” Adak says.
“But you love the Bobcats,” I say.
He pulls me forward, meeting me in the middle over the console and kisses my forehead.
Then he doesn’t have a choice but to turn back to the road when the light turns green.
“I do love the Bobcats and leaving them is going to suck. But your safety is my priority. You’re not safe here. We’re not safe here.”
I hate the way guilt eats at me. If I hadn’t come into Adak’s life, this wouldn’t be happening to him right now. He wouldn’t be leaving the Bobcats. For me!
“I love you,” Adak says, and I look at him. His eyes flash to mine briefly. “I love you. I love you.”
He keeps repeating it until I stop internally panicking. “I love you too.”
“I’m never living without you, Oren. I really don’t care what kinds of hurdles we face. You’re it for me. Understand?”
I nod. Shifting in my seat, I lean across the console and lay my head against his arm. It’s unsafe for both of us, but I just need to feel him.
“When are we leaving?” I whisper.
“As soon as we can.”