Keeley #4
He peeled my fingers off the armrest, his calloused palm sliding against my softer one as he held it.
I bit back a moan. His hand was warm, his fingers so much thicker and longer than mine that they enveloped my hand easily.
He squeezed gently and brought my fingers to his lips.
He scraped his teeth over the pads, and the way his soft lips caressed my fingers shot tingles through my entire body, all of which gathered in my clit.
I sucked in a breath. My nipples hardened, and my pussy throbbed.
Miller’s gaze never left mine. His stare heated me from the inside out.
Not a single word passed between us, but he didn’t need to say anything. I squeezed my thighs together, and he registered the movement, his eyes flicking briefly down to my legs. He groaned, and the sound rendered me a quivering mess, my hormones going wild as my pussy throbbed again.
“God,” I rasped, my voice husky.
“Darlin’, y’all’re supposed to be part of us. See what you do to me?” Miller lowered my hand to his hard-as-stone cock and pressed it against his rigid length. I instinctively squeezed him, earning a hiss.
Reality slammed into me, and I jolted back, pulling my hand away like I’d been burned. I needed to tread carefully. I wanted him too much to keep resisting him. I didn’t have the strength to keep denying him, even though I knew I should.
My mind was a jumble of exhaustion and stress, and given half a chance, I’d swipe everything off the desk and beg him to take me just to escape the real world for a moment.
Except that it’d be far too real. I didn’t want a relationship or even a hookup, but damn, he was hard to resist.
“Please,” I begged. I couldn’t do this. But I wanted him so bad. I was so desperate, so close to giving in. but I needed him to be strong, to do the right thing.
“Touch me,” he pleaded.
But I couldn’t. If I did, it’d all be over. My ability to resist him was waning.
I stood abruptly, my chair bouncing off the wall, and I pushed past him, needing to put some space between us. But pulling away from him was torture. Every atom in me begged me to get close to him again. I crossed my arms over my body and curled into myself, forcing myself to stand still.
“Hey,” he said, then walked over to the door and closed it before coming closer. He gently cupped my elbows. “I’m sorry for upsetting you. I thought we vibed, but if I misread the situation, I’ll go to HR right now and file a complaint against myself.”
“You haven’t misread it. I’m attracted to you.” I huffed out a laugh and shook my head. “Ridiculously so. You and Spencer are both gorgeous, and you know it. But I can’t.”
“Okay,” he said easily.
I blinked, then looked away from him. My eyes filled with tears, and I couldn’t help the hitch in my breath.
I wanted him. I didn’t want just sex, but there was no way I wanted anything more either.
It was so stupid for me to wish that he’d fight for me, especially when my head was so jumbled up that I didn’t know what I wanted.
It’d been so long since I felt like I’d been first. Simon wanted me back, but not because he loved me.
He wanted my money, Hannah, and the power trip he got from having two women.
I was so freaking lonely and tired. I could barely keep a lid on my emotions—case in point. I just wanted someone to be strong for me and to want me as well.
Miller rubbed my arms and softly asked, “Want to talk about it?”
“My life is a mess.” I shrugged my shoulders and closed my eyes, embarrassed by the tears that tracked down my cheeks. It was all too much. My lip wobbled, and I bit back a sob. “I’m exhausted.”
“Is it work?” he pressed gently.
I shook my head, and he pulled me into his arms. I gripped the soft material of his shirt and sank into his embrace. He was warm and strong, his big body surrounding mine so perfectly. I breathed in his fresh-from-the-shower citrusy scent, and my tears fell.
“Personal stuff? Hannah?”
I nodded, and he rubbed my back. “You can tell me. I promise I’m a good listener.” Then he pressed a kiss to my temple.
The gentleness completely undid me.
He was cocky and often a smartass, but right now, he was everything I needed. He made me feel like he had all the time in the world for me, that for a split second in time, I was the center of his universe.
“My ex won’t leave me alone,” I confessed. “He keeps telling me he wants to get back together. I’m scared he’s going to fight me for custody.”
Miller tilted my face up. “Are you frightened of him?”
I blinked, taken aback that he’d be worried about me like that, and more tears dripped down my cheeks. “No. He’s manipulative and self-centered, but I don’t think he’s dangerous.”
“Okay.” He held me tight for a moment longer, then prompted, “What else is happenin’, darlin’?” His voice was deep and rumbly, the drawl unmistakable.
I huffed out a laugh that held no humor, and my lip wobbled, my tears starting again.
He ran his hand over my hair and gently pulled me closer.
I let go of his shirt and wound my arms around his waist, then nuzzled into the crook of his neck.
He let out a rumbly purr, and I held him tighter.
It was easier to tell him about the confusing mess in my head when I didn’t have to see his reaction to my words.
“He says he’s thinking of our kids—his son and my daughter.
He wants Hannah to grow up with a brother.
He’s contacting me all the time. Last night he telephoned nonstop for thirty minutes after we got home from the game.
Even when I told him I was busy, he still kept calling.
” I didn’t wait for Miller to respond before I continued.
“He told me he wants to make amends. He said he’s trying to communicate openly with me and just wants what’s best for the kids.
He wants them to have a father. Neither of us had one—he wants to do better.
He wants to get back together for the kids. ”
“Do you love him?” Miller asked, his arms still tight around me, comforting me.
“I hate him,” I admitted without hesitation.
The weight I’d been carrying lifted. I didn’t still love him.
My confusion and fear were unfounded. “I hate how he betrayed me and how I don’t think he’s intending to stop with two of us.
I hate myself for being too blind to see our marriage was falling apart.
I hate how he made out that I’d encouraged him to pursue Amanda, even though I hadn’t, and how he’s now turning it all around and making out that I’m the one betraying our vows when it was all his fault. ”
I sucked in a wobbly breath, and Miller slid his big hands into my hair and kneaded my scalp, slowly massaging it. I groaned and melted against his sure touch.
“I don’t want him. I don’t love him anymore. But I need to think about Hannah too. She’s never had a father. Maybe she needs one. I don’t know if I’m enough. Maybe if I gave him a second chance, things could be different.”
Miller grunted and asked, “Do you really believe that?”
My shoulders slumped as I exhaled. He wrapped me in his arms again, and I shook my head.
“No. He doesn’t want to break up with Amanda.
He wants all of us to live together like some sister-wife deal.
I wouldn’t put it past him to try to add more women to his little harem.
” I fought down the bile that was creeping up my throat. “But it’s not all about me, is it?”