50. Vesper #2
I don’t see the others the rest of the night. I don’t go looking for Locke or Havoc. Honestly, I could go without seeing Havoc for a while, but I do hope Locke is okay at least. Stevie is with him, at least, so that makes me feel a little bit better.
By the next morning, the hollow feeling in my chest has faded again unless I think too hard about it.
I stretch and get dressed, making sure to clean up and enjoy the hot shower I get in case the next safehouse doesn’t have one.
At this point, I’ve come to expect the unexpected.
It just makes more sense at this point to be prepared for anything and not take any perk for granted.
The moment I walk out of the Half-Moon Hotel after returning my key, it’s to find Locke and Havoc standing outside, distance between them.
Locke is leaning against a wall, looking out over the water of the river with his shoulders tense.
Havoc is on the nearest bench, leaning back, calm and at ease. Stevie floats around Locke, silent.
When I step out, no one moves. They don’t acknowledge my existence at all.
“Well?” I say, crossing my arms. “Are we looking for the second Minor Boss in the Gilded District today or what?”
Havoc doesn’t respond. He just stands up and stretches before looking at me expectantly, like he assumes I will take the lead.
And likely not ask him for help.
“You can stay here, you know,” I grunt. “No one is forcing you to come with us.”
He mumbles something under his breath that sounds suspiciously like, “That’s what you think,” but I don’t quite catch it and decide to ignore it.
Locke stands up and moves closer to me, but he’s very careful not to meet my eyes. In fact, when I try to meet his eyes, he turns his head completely away, as if ashamed.
What the fuck happened when I left them yesterday?
Neither man has any wounds, so clearly, it hadn’t devolved into a fist fight. I glance at Stevie. “You good, Stevie?”
“I’m fab-u-lous, Girl! It’s a glorious morning. I feel, like, totally awesome. I’m ready for the day!” Those eyes blink at me. “Just bask in my glow and let me fuel you!”
I smile. Stevie has really grown on me, even if I still don’t exactly understand what he is. Dangerous, yes. But . . . I don’t understand anything else. Maybe I’ll ask him about all of that if the guys don’t end up talking.
We start walking in the direction of the other Minor Boss, slowly moving through the long streets of New Babel. By the time the sun is high in the sky overhead, my ability to handle the heavy tension in our group has worn thin. Ultimately, it’s Svetlana who breaks the tension before I can.
Of course it is.
“It’s so tense I could cut the tension with my razor-sharp tibial spines,” she declares. “This tension is giving me a headache.”
I stop moving and whirl on the two men walking behind me at her words, realizing how fed up I am with it, too. “What exactly happened here?” I demand, stopping them before they can pass me.
Havoc just looks at me with a smirk on his lips that I would really like to knock off his face. I restrain myself, of course. I doubt I’d win against a Tier Three. So, I look at Locke instead.
He still isn’t meeting my eyes.
“Hello?” I growl. “Is someone going to fucking clue me in?”
“Nothing happened that you need to worry about,” Locke murmurs, staring off into the distance rather than into my eyes. In fact, he goes out of his way to avoid my gaze entirely.
“What the actual fuck?” I spit. “After everything we’ve been through together?”
Locke seems to shrink in on himself. “This is the Harrow,” he whispers. “No one here is your friend.”
My brows furrow the same time as my stomach drops. “What do you mean?” I ask. “What about all the talks about a guild?”
“I was wrong,” he says. “Forget about it.”
Anger fills me. Something happened between them.
Havoc said some stupid shit and made Locke feel bad and now here we are at square one.
“That’s bullshit!” I snarl. Fed up with his avoidance, I grab his face in my hands and force him to look at me.
He’s stronger than me as a Bone Breaker, but he doesn’t jerk away for fear of hurting me.
Which tells me all I need to know.
“What the fuck is wrong with you right now?” I grit through my teeth. “Talk to me.”
His face twists and for the first time, I realize that Locke really could hurt me.
I’ve known, but I’ve never thought he would.
Not after everything we’ve been through.
The way his face twists now though makes me think that with his last level up, something else changed. Something not even he has realized.
“You know exactly how dangerous I am,” Locke growls, his voice like gravel. “I have no doubt that Cipher is in your little head telling you how bad of an idea it is to stick around—”
“I don’t care about that!” I growl.
“You should!” he snarls back at me, his voice so thick, it has my instincts screaming at me to step back. I don’t. I hold on tighter. “You don’t know me, Vesper!”
I lean closer, looking deeply into his eyes. “Whoever you think you are doesn’t have to be who you are if you don’t want to be,” I point out. “You don’t have to follow some fucking rules just because other people think you should.”
“That’s the thing,” he says, pulling away from my hands. This time, he uses his strength to pry me off and I can’t fight him. “I’m exactly who I think I am. And clearly, those two motherfuckers know it, the legend and the system.” He takes a step back from me and I reach for him.
“Locke,” I try. “Don’t.”
He takes another step away, and I can see his intention in every movement. He’s walking away. He’s leaving me here. After everything. After all we fought through and survived. After the bond we’ve formed. After I’d started fucking caring for him.
“Please,” I add, my voice thick with emotion.
When I’d come into this shithole without Dox, I’d been lost, but having Locke at my side had grounded me. We survived together. I didn’t have to be in this place alone. And I care for the Bone Breaker now. I care so fucking much. I don’t want him to go.
I reach out my hand toward him. “Please,” I repeat.
His gaze drops to my hand and he hesitates. His own hand twitches like he wants to take mine, but then his eyes flick back over to Havoc and his eyes harden.
“I’m sorry, Vesper,” he whispers. “But you have the legend now. You don’t need me.”
And then he disappears into the crowds of the Gilded District.