Chapter 6
Six
C ooper
“The days of getting perfect grades are over, aren’t they?
” Sybil sighs, plopping her face into the open textbook and groaning.
I’m tempted to do the same, but basking in the scent of paper and desperation isn’t going to fix the hell that is finals week.
I thought our prep school was hard, and studying for the SATs had been awful, but nobody warned me how difficult studying for finals would be, especially at Harvard.
Guess Sybil didn’t get the memo, either.
“Unfortunately, perfect grades might not be possible here,” I say, offering a conspiratorial smile.
We’re sitting across from each other, Perry Hargrove at my side and my brother next to her. It’s a miracle we all got into the business school, but thank God I’m not doing this alone.
“Why don’t we take a break?” I offer. It’s the weekend, we’ve been at it for hours, and my brain is mush. “Let’s go find a party or something. We can come back to this tomorrow.”
“I’m down.” Perry closes his textbook with an audible thwack . “Besides, I’m ready for the final.”
Of course he is. Perry is a genius. He’s even got the Mensa card to prove his high IQ.
Right now, he’s smiling like the fucking Cheshire Cat.
He has the best smile, was even voted “best smile” back in school.
Probably because he’s so fucking smart that life seems to come easy to him.
That, and he doesn’t have his family demanding every move he makes.
He actually gets to choose what he’s going to do for a career. Imagine that.
“You’re ready for the final?” Sybil scoffs. “I kind of want to throw my textbook at you right now.”
At least Perry has the decency to look sheepish.
“Yeah, ‘cause he has a photographic memory,” Ethan points out. “The rest of us need to keep studying.”
That’s Ethan for you. He’s like a drill sergeant when it comes to school. I probably wouldn’t be at a school like this if it weren’t for Ethan’s constant pestering.
“You’re right. I know you’re right,” Sybil says, all high-pitched and sounding like she’s on the verge of tears. “But I think if I read through these macroeconomics notes one more time, I’m going to cry. Honestly. My soul is tired.”
Well, shit. The last thing I want to see is Sybil cry.
I’ve shoved my romantic feelings toward her into the pits of hell where they belong, but that doesn’t mean I want her to suffer. Perry is ready to go, but Ethan is staring at us like we’re being dramatic. We’re not. We need a fucking break.
“Listen, this semester has been like preparing for a long-distance marathon, and next week is the big race. We know it’s important—that’s why we’ve been training for it for months—but even marathon runners take breaks, don’t they?”
Ethan rolls his eyes. “This is academics we’re talking about here.”
“Yeah, and we’re also young and in college. It can’t be s tudy, study, study all the time. We need balance.”
Sybil turns on him with the sweetest grin, and I’m sure she’s going to get him to see our side. “Please? Let’s have a few hours of fun, go to bed early, and then study all day tomorrow. That’s what Sundays are for.”
The fucker has the audacity to shake his head.
My fingers curl into fists under the table. Doesn’t he see that she needs this? Doesn’t she see he’s controlling her? They’re already so fucking codependent they might as well get surgically attached at the hip.
“Don’t look at me like that.” Ethan turns on me with narrowed eyes. “I’m not going to apologize for being responsible. We’ve had our fun this semester, but it’s time to buckle down. There are different ways to approach education here. We’ve talked about this, Cooper. You know what Dad said.”
Off at college and our father still controls our lives.
The lectures have been endless, so I can see exactly where Ethan is getting this from. Truth is, like us, a lot of our peers know they are going to be set for life either way. Most of those kids don’t worry about their grades so long as they pass their classes.
And then there are the kids who need Harvard as a steppingstone.
They don’t have connections, and they’re not necessarily going to find them easily, not like they probably thought they would.
They have to do everything right to leverage this education into something great.
Honestly, more power to them. I’d do the same thing if I was in their shoes.
But as for us? Our father expects perfection.
He expects the Dean’s list. He expects high honors.
He especially expects us to make it into the master’s program at the business school, a feat that won’t be easy whatsoever.
It doesn’t matter that we are required to work for King Media or forgo our trust funds; we must impress our father.
And our father has a way of getting exactly what he wants.
But Sybil? Her father babies her. She doesn’t have to get perfect grades or anything even close to them.
She’s going to work for the family company when it’s all over, same as us, but she’s not required to graduate.
But Sybil has a type-A personality with high standards for herself.
She wants to succeed, make her family proud, and earn her place with Laurence International.
She’s got something to prove, and she will.
It’s obvious her family members aren’t the only ones she wants to make proud.
Now that she has Ethan, she’s not willing to lose him, even if it means disagreeing about how much studying is an appropriate amount.
It’s infuriating how quickly she’s needed his approval.
This is not the girl I knew for eighteen years.
I can’t sit here and watch this.
I get up, packing my things. “Last chance. Are you guys coming?” I look at Sybil. “You don’t have to do everything Ethan does just because you’re a couple now.”
“Oh, fuck off. It’s not like that,” Ethan says, putting his arm around his girl, proving my damn point.
She hesitates before she says what I know she’s going to. “I’m staying with Ethan. You guys have fun.”
Doesn’t matter if I call her out. Doesn’t matter if I try to talk to him about it. They’re together and won’t listen to anybody when it comes to their relationship, which—in my opinion—has quickly become unhealthy.
But nobody asked for my opinion.
“Let’s go,” I say to Perry, and after dropping our bags at the dorm, we spend the next few hours getting shitfaced at the bar with our fake IDs and hitting on pretty girls who aren’t obsessed with my brother.
I wouldn’t mind finding one to sleep with.
It’s the only thing that helps get the thought of Ethan and Sybil out of my head.
They’ve been doing it since August when she gave him her virginity after a few months of dating.
I didn’t know she was still a virgin, but Ethan told me all about it.
He tells me everything. Even the things that keep me up at night, sick to my stomach.
“Ready to go?” Perry asks after finishing his beer. The girls we were flirting with went to the bathroom, and he’s obviously not feeling it anymore. “Everyone’s too fucking stressed tonight.”
He’s right. I’m not into it tonight, either. I’m so ready for this semester to be over. So I agree to leave, but when I stand, I wobble, and Perry has to catch me. Shit. I’m way more inebriated than I thought.
“I got you,” Perry says, practically holding me up as we make our way to our dorm building. “Damn, I didn’t realize you had so much. You really need to lay off the alcohol.”
I nod, but I’m not listening. I’m thinking about them .
“It sucks now that Ethan and I are sharing a dorm room,” I say, slurring my words.
“And why is that?”
“He’s constantly fucking Sybil in there,” I say angrily. At least, that’s how I mean to sound, but it comes out all slurred and sad, like I’m on the verge of tears. I’m not. “And then I have to find somewhere else to crash, and it’s annoying.”
“He does the same for you when you bring a girl over,” Perry points out.
“Not the same.”
“Right, because Sybil is the girl you’ve secretly been in love with for years?” Perry asks.
“Yeah,” I choke out, immediately regretting my confession. “Wait. No. Wait. Don’t say anything.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Perry assures me with a light chuckle. “You can trust me, don’t worry. But it’s not like you’re inconspicuous. I’ve suspected your crush for years, man.”
I grimace, my head starting to pound.
“Next year will be better,” he continues. “We’re getting that off-campus house, remember? Separate bedrooms.”
“Thank Jesus,” I slur out, not sure if I mean it.
Next year’s housing arrangements were supposed to be better, but then Ethan and Sybil made plans to share the primary suite like a fucking married couple. So, it might actually be worse. I’ll have to live with them playing house.
We round the corner, only to find the pair of lovebirds in a passionate embrace. My stomach curdles, but I let out a low whistle to fake how I’m really feeling inside. God, I’m pathetic.
“Get a room,” Perry yells, and the couple breaks apart.
I drop my head low, letting the hair fall to shadow my face.
“Are you drunk, Cooper?” Ethan asks, the judgment thick. “I know it’s not abnormal for college freshmen to drink a lot, but you’ve been getting blackout drunk every weekend like it’s your second job.”
“Shut up,” I grumble, but I’m already half asleep, leaning against the wall of a man that is Perry.
Sybil puts her hand on my shoulder. “Are you okay?”
I gaze at her, admiring the way her hair looks vibrant red under the streetlight. She’s so fucking pretty. “Valentine, did you get your studying done?”
I duck from under Perry’s arm and practically fall into Sybil, but Ethan catches me. “Hey brother, why don’t we go find you some water and a bed?”
I keep my gaze on the girl of my dreams. “Well? Are you ready for the final?”
She nods, and I smile, pointing between her and my brother, trying to pretend all is fucking right with the world. “You two? You’re good for each other. Everybody says so. Everybody knows so.” Shit, my words are slurring again.
Her eyebrows furrow together and those pretty lips pout. “Really, are you okay?”
“Never better.”
Ethan and Perry help me to the dorm, and while part of me feels bad that my brother has to babysit a drunk tonight, most of me is pretty damn happy with how this night is ending. Me in my bed. Ethan in his. And Sybil in the next building over.
But my joy doesn’t last long. I fall asleep quickly, my heart aching in my chest. It shouldn’t ache so badly when I’ve never given it to anyone. I shouldn’t care this much. Why do I fucking care this much?
I need to get over her, and it’s killing me that I can’t.