Chapter 38
Thirty-Eight
C ooper
The first time I saw Arden, it was like being punched in the chest.
Auburn hair flashing in the firelight. Freckles scattered across the bridge of her nose like constellations. Big, haunting eyes, and a heart-shaped mouth that could ruin a man. For a second, I forgot how to breathe.
She looked like her. The resemblance was so uncanny; it was honestly painful.
I hadn’t seen Sybil in almost a year, and here she was again, only it wasn’t her. Not even close. Seeing Arden was like looking into a distorted mirror. Almost the real thing, but not quite right.
The commonalities stopped at appearances. Their backgrounds, personalities, and energy couldn’t be more different.
Sybil is summer’s golden hour—warm and radiant, but only in your life for a moment before leaving you in darkness.
Arden is moonlight on a quiet winter’s night. Wounded. Guarded in a way that makes me wonder how bad her childhood really was. She’s more fantasy than girl—out of reach and not quite real, haunting me with who she isn’t.
It’s been a little over a month since Arden arrived at our beach house, introducing herself as our live-in housekeeper for the summer. In that time, she’s become a sort of mirage to me. She’s this vision of false promises and a constant reminder of what I can’t have.
It hurts me to look at her, but Ethan?
Ethan is unraveling.
I’ve never seen him so bothered by anyone before, not even our father. He claims to hate Arden, but despite this claim, he’s more possessive than I’ve ever seen him.
Sometimes I think he’s far more obsessed with Arden than he ever was with Sybil.
My interest is shallow. I only want to sleep with her because she reminds me of the one girl I’ll never get to take to bed.
But she told me she’s a virgin, and her innocence makes this whole thing way too complicated.
So… tell me why I’m currently kissing her?
I found her on the beach watching the sunset, and I couldn’t help myself. I convinced her to get in the water with me, and now I’ve got my hands in her hair and my mouth on her wet lips.
It’s wrong, but it doesn’t matter. I never claimed to be a good person.
Before I know it, I’ve got her in my bedroom, and I tangle in her like gravity pulled me here instead of my own selfish greed. She’s small, and her trembling hands speak to her lack of experience as she runs them over my body.
I shouldn’t, but I strip her down to her panties, anyway.
I’m completely naked two seconds later.
Rational thoughts disappear; all that matters is our bodies and what I want them to do. I take her breast into my mouth, savoring her nipple until she moans. I know how to bring a woman to orgasm, and that’s all I focus on.
I’m a shitty person for using her, but at least I can make her feel good in the process.
“You like that?” I pull away with a smug grin, and when she nods, I grip my erection, loving the way she looks down at it with complete awe and need.
It feels amazing, knowing she is looking at me like this, that I’m the one she wants.
That I’m the one being chosen for once. That my brother isn’t the man she picked…
Fuck. What am I even thinking? This shouldn’t be about Ethan at all, but Arden looking the way she looks makes this about a lot more than just me and her.
Taking her hand, I wrap it around my cock, savoring the sensation of her needy fingers and the sense of urgency building between us.
We kiss again, and I grow feral, practically fucking her hand as we explore each other’s bodies.
It’s not enough, not even close, so I lead her to the bed and kiss my way down her torso, readying to yank her panties off her hips and plunge my cock inside her wet virgin cunt.
The door flies open.
“What the fuck ?” Ethan’s voice slices through the haze. He’s storming toward us, wild-eyed and furious, like he has a right to this woman, and I don’t. It’s utter bullshit. Arden is not Sybil.
He yanks me from Arden, and she scrambles away, covering herself like she’s been caught doing something wrong. Her eyes fill with confusion, guilt, and shame, knocking the air out of me.
Wait… did she not want this?
“What are you doing?” he spits at me.
“What does it look like?” I’m fucking pissed, and I don’t even care that I’m naked.
Sybil chose him. That was my burden.
Arden? She chose me. That’s his fucking burden for once.
“You agreed not to fuck her,” he snarls, pushing me against the wall.
I can’t believe he’s bringing up a conversation we had when we very first met Arden, when we’d both agreed to keep things with our young housekeeper professional.
That went out the window when we got to know her.
He knows things have changed. He’s been hot and cold with her for a month.
Arden yells at Ethan to get out, and he yells back at her that our conversation is none of her business. She sits up, covering herself while she and my brother continue to argue, and the truth hits me hard, opening a wound I thought had been healed.
She doesn’t want me. She wants him.
I can’t be here for a moment longer. I snatch up my clothes, my mind spinning numbly as I walk across the hall to Ethan’s room and turn his shower to a scalding temperature.
I’m freezing from the ocean water, my erection is gone, and more than anything, I need to wash away everything that just happened.
What the fuck is wrong with me? I almost took that girl’s virginity because of my selfish fucking ego.
It’s one thing to sleep around with willing participants, but it’s another to fixate on an eighteen-year-old virgin with gaping emotional wounds.
Whoever she gives her virginity to needs to take it with care and respect, and they also need to take her heart and cherish it.
I wasn’t doing any of those things. I don’t think I’m capable of them.
I wanted to fuck her like an animal, pretend she was Sybil, and get her out of my system.
I’m such a prick.
I step out of the shower, towel off, then find Ethan waiting for me. He’s standing by the door, his arms folded over his chest as if he’s playing bodyguard.
“Are we going to talk about what the hell that was?” he asks, his eyes narrowed into angry slits. “What is wrong with you, Cooper? Arden is a virgin.”
Yup. The man is livid. “What’s there to talk about?” I sigh. “You’re right. I shouldn’t have done that.”
The mask of anger cracks, relief smoothing his features. “ So… you’re not going to sleep with Arden?”
“She’s not worth the trouble.”
The anger returns, and in an instant, he’s on me, shoving me against the wall. That’s twice in ten minutes.
“She’s worth the trouble, you asshole, but she’s not like one of your hookups. If you want to be with her, you have to actually date her and treat her with the respect she deserves.”
I crack a smile and push him off, my index finger in his face. “I knew it. You like her.”
He shakes his head. “I’m looking out for her.”
I snort. “Pretty sure she didn’t appreciate you ripping me off her when she wanted to fuck me.”
“Don’t call it fucking when you’re talking about her.”
His face is a thundercloud, but I laugh it off and walk past him, slipping into my bedroom.
Thankfully, it’s empty. I don’t know what the hell I’m going to say to her when I see her again, but I know Ethan well enough to know he has real feelings for the girl, even if he won’t admit it.
He won’t act on anything until he’s ready to be that guy she needs.
Or maybe he won’t act on anything at all.
Either way, I’m staying out of it from now on.
An hour later, he knocks on my door and asks me to go to the bar with him.
I’m not sure I’m up for it, but he sounds pathetic. “Please. I need to get out of this house. It’s too goddamn small tonight.”
Interesting word choice, considering our house is a fortress.
What’s my brother going to do next? Will he find a random girl to hook up with? He’s been uncharacteristically celibate this summer. If he finds a woman, I can’t help but wonder who he’s trying to chase from his mind.
Sybil or Arden?
But Ethan doesn’t hook up with anyone.
Me, on the other hand? I never claimed to be perfect.