Chapter 15
“That’s my issue with excessive drinking, y’all. If something bad happens, you drink to forget. If something good happens, you drink to celebrate. And if nothing happens, you drink hoping to make something happen.”
I clunked my head on the table, then wrinkled my nose and raised it quickly, taking in the smells of stale beer and peanut shells.
My margarita was long forgotten at the bar, but Emma, Miller’s fiancée, must have taken pity on me because she pushed a glass of water closer.
I wrapped my mouth around the straw, taking a long pull and letting the cool sensation travel to my stomach.
“That is oddly accurate, Summer,” Addison said as she sipped on her Cosmo. “I don’t mind losing my inhibitions every once in a while, but the second I turned thirty, I went from mixing red bulls with vodka until one in the morning to getting a headache after one glass of white wine.”
“I have the alcohol tolerance of a lima bean, so one light beer and I’m golden.” Mina laughed and held up her beer before clinking it against the Cosmo.
“All the more reason I’m glad you both joined us. This is the first time Summer’s been out with the group as well,” Addison said, fishing the cherry from her cocktail.
“That’s right, and I’m having a great time.” I raised the water and smiled as a warm, comfortable feeling crept through my body.
“So am I,” Mina said, bumping her shoulder with Jenna, Mark’s wife. “And I can’t thank you girls enough for talking me through my dilemma.”
“Are you kidding?” I said, feeling a flare of envy toward the young twenty-something and how much of her life she still had ahead of her. “Deciding to take a sabbatical from work and travel around the world for half a year is amazing!”
“It really is,” Jenna added, pulling the last of the onion rings with spicy barbeque sauce closer. “And now’s the perfect time in your life to do it. Who knows? You might end up meeting a foreign movie star in some exotic country and falling madly in love.”
“Ha,” Mina said, snagging the last potato skin from another plate. “I’ll just settle for not having any regrets. I’m not holding my breath for getting starstruck by a famous movie star.”
“Well, here’s hoping,” Brooke said, scooting her chair closer to mine.
“I think an affair with a foreign stranger is exactly what you need.” Brooke leaned her shoulder against mine and lowered her voice, causing us all to move closer.
“And speaking of affairs. You know, Summer, I’m positive everyone at this table’s noticed a certain silver fox hasn’t been able to tear his eyes away from you. ”
“Oh yeah. Those biceps are something else, aren’t they?” Emma added. “Not to mention the tattoos. We all saw the way he was looking at you while y’all were talking at the bar.”
I groaned, struggling to keep myself from banging my head against the table, regardless of the smell and stickiness.
“Yeah. Talk about a man of mystery. Simon has been trying to figure Maverick out since he partnered with TriVolt.”
“There’s nothing to figure out, Addie,” Jenna said, shrugging her shoulders.
Since she was married to the youngest Hansen brother, Mark, I’d probably be better off listening to her insight than Addison’s, who told me her goal tonight was to get me laid—which was about as likely as a shady van pulling into the parking lot and offering curbside lobotomies.
I tried to seem uninterested—swirling the straw in the water glass and keeping my eyes averted from the conversation—but nothing could be further from the truth.
I’d like to think he’d only been on my mind since that afternoon in the kitchen, but there was no point lying to the little voice inside my head.
At least the voice kept the judgment to a minimum. What had started as innocent thoughts about him—like wondering how he spent his free time, and why he treated his dog like a princess and was a grump to everyone else—had slowly turned into deeper urges.
Urges to heal the hurt from his past.
Urges that went against the way I’d been treating him.
Guilt seeped into my bones like snow in winter. And although I had no desire to open my heart up to another man after Trey, my body had other ideas. I glanced at the water ring the glass had left on the table, and then at Jenna, rubbing my palms along my thighs.
“I can’t do casual, y’all. I’m just not built that way. But something about Maverick has stuck with me, and I don’t know how to handle it.”
“There’s nothing wrong with that,” Emma added, glancing at the table where the guys were sitting and winking at Miller. “But if there’s a chance that what you feel could lead to happiness, why not go for it?”
She made sense. I knew she did. But knowing there was a bigger chance that I’d get hurt made it difficult to agree.
“Listen, Summer. From the time their dad died, and then Maverick’s wife less than a year later, he took it upon himself to become the head of the family.
I don’t think he knows how to be anything else.
When we were taking the baby for a walk the other day, Mark told me he’s never seen Maverick as out of sorts as he’s been lately. ”
“Out of sorts? What exactly does that mean, Jenna?”
The girls leaned closer to hear me, and I put my hands in my lap, bouncing my knee and picking the cuticle on my thumb while I waited for her to continue.
Maybe hearing this would help with my indecision.
But I had a feeling nothing short of having a conversation with him would, and that was something I’d been avoiding since our collision of tongues and teeth in my kitchen.
“It means,” she answered, raising a brow and smirking, “that you have one hell of a loyal and trusting man genuinely confused because he’s taken an interest in you.”
“You forgot stubborn,” Emma said, pulling the mozzarella sticks to her side of the table.
“Oh, without a doubt. But remember, sometimes the sweetest rewards come from the hardest challenges.” Jenna adjusted her glasses, pinning me with a look that said resistance was futile and that I needed to trust her.
It was bizarre. In all my life, I’d never met a more intuitive group of women, and a warmth bloomed in my belly knowing they’d accepted me.
“So, are you interested in seeing if there’s potential?” Addison pushed, winking at Jenna, who smiled and rolled her eyes.
“Come on, y’all,” I said, as my poor attempt at deflecting caused several giggles and raised brows. “This isn’t middle school. We’re not passing notes to boys after class, asking them to check yes or no. I’m too old for subtle flirting and wondering if he likes me or not.”
“Then skip all the bullshit. Grab him and kiss him. See if there’s any chemistry.”
My mouth gaped, opening and closing as Addison’s words sunk in. Little did they know just how much chemistry we’d already shared.
They didn’t know about the shower incident.
And they absolutely were in the dark about what we shared in my kitchen.
I warred with myself, wondering if I should share those intense moments with the table. But the longer the seconds stretched on between Addison’s words, the surer I was that it wasn’t something they needed to know.
“So, if there is, see where it leads. If not, move on. Now, you still haven’t answered the question,” Addison prodded. “Are you interested?”
I thought about how Maverick made my knees weak and my spine tingle. And about the unfinished drama with Trey. But more than all the reasons I could think of, and more prevalent than my carnal urges, the most potent emotion I felt was a soul-deep need.
The need for someone to see me.
The need to be desired.
“I’m not not interested.” That response was pitifully lacking, but it was the first time I’d voiced my wants aloud, and that had to count for something, right?
“Talk about a non-answer,” Addison said, lightly elbowing me in the arm.
“Ugh. I know. Okay. Fine. I’m interested, and I’d like to see where this goes. If he’s amenable, of course.”
“Well, it’s obvious there’s chemistry, and definitely no harm in taking things slow,” Brooke said.
“I’ve been working at TriVolt for a while now, and one thing I can tell you is that Maverick never decides on a course of action without weighing both sides.
So maybe you can take the initiative and show him what he’s been missing? ”
“So, my options are a pitiful attempt at flirting or sliding up to him and sticking my tongue down his throat. I don’t know what’s worse.”
They laughed at my turmoil, causing people at the tables around us to turn and stare. I chuckled nervously and released a sharp exhale, glancing around until the patrons focused back on their friends.
“You don’t have to jump right to tonsil-hockey, but it’s definitely an option,” Emma said, looking toward the bar.
I followed her gaze and met Maverick’s eyes. He pursed his lips and arched a brow, crossing his arms before slowly turning in the opposite direction.
“This was a bad idea. Clearly, I’m experiencing some early onset perimenopausal symptoms that have turned my brain to grape jelly. Let’s forget about this discussion, please.”
“Stop overthinking,” Addison said, smacking her palm on the table.
“We could keep sitting here, talking in circles about how you feel or what we think is going on in Maverick’s skull, but it won’t make a damn bit of difference if someone doesn’t make a move.
At least with rejection—not that Maverick would do that—you’d know where you stand. ”
“Ugh. Stop making sense.”
“Never. Now, should we dance, ladies? Show our men how lucky they are to have us? Maybe help Mina and Summer find a warm body to press against?”
“I will say one thing, though. Not that I have a problem returning interest if he shows it, but I was married to a man I had to emotionally coach every step of the way. And I refuse to enter into another relationship where I have to do that again.”
“Hear, hear,” Mina said, squeezing my shoulder. “Never chase someone. Forcing them to feel something beyond their emotional intelligence never ends well. Now, let’s dance.”
Emma and Brooke smiled while Jenna shook her head vigorously before taking her glasses off and cleaning them on her blouse.
“I’ll keep watch over those tater tots. Until I get this baby weight off, the only thing my body does is jiggle.”
“Oh, stop it,” I said, leaning across the table to clasp Jenna’s arm. “You are not supposed to look the same after having a baby.”
“Yeah. You’re even hotter now,” Addison said. “And for as much as Maverick has stared at Summer, Mark has been making googly eyes at you all night.”
“Yeah,” Emma giggled. “I thought Miller and I were bad, but it’s nothing compared to how Mark has been eye fucking you.”
I laughed, shaking my head as Emma turned to me and winked.
“Right then, ladies. Down those drinks and let’s dance!” Addison stood and grabbed her Cosmo, finishing the cocktail, then turning and scanning the neighboring tables. She spotted the white-blond hair of her fiancé, Simon, and beckoned him closer with her index finger.
Emma, Brooke, and Jenna did the same to their men, while Mina and I shrugged, following the group to the dance floor.
I caught Maverick’s eye as we walked, and he tilted his head, his gaze following me until I stopped at the edge of the floor, taking in the couples.
Mina and I gravitated toward one another, staying on the edge of the dance floor, reluctant to disappear into the fray.
Before long, the music had quieted the nonsense in my head, allowing me to enjoy the evening without consequences.