Chapter 19 Jackson
nineteen
Jackson
I stand outside Kaci’s door, shifting my weight from one leg to the other.
When she opens the door, I inhale sharply.
She’s wearing her hair down in soft waves that fall almost to the middle of her back, and a dark navy sweater paired with jeans.
All the blue highlights the different hues in her eyes. She’s absolutely stunning.
“Our first official date.” I forgo a traditional hello. “How do you feel?”
“I’m ready.” A playful smile tugs on her lips as she pulls the door open wide, her eyes glittering when she says, “Come on in.”
“Thanks for having me over.” I slip inside.
This is the hard part of the night. The awkwardness.
It’s our first date. In a strange way, I feel as if we’ve already had about five dates.
I want our first real date to be special and memorable.
She’s all I’ve thought about, and I couldn’t wait to see her again.
Oddly when I offered to take her out to eat, she said she didn’t feel like going out and offered to eat dinner here.
I hold up my takeout bag from The Grove, the place she actually works as she offered to call in a to-go order. “I got our food.”
She brushes her hand across her midsection. “It smells amazing, and I’m starving.”
I walk to the table, remove her salad from the bag, and hand it to her. “No onions or tomatoes. Just as you requested.”
“Thank you.” She places it on the table and sits down, taking a minute to stare at me.
I don’t think I’ll ever get used to the way it feels to have her look at me.
I set my to-go box in front of my chair and pause, returning her gaze.
She goes on staring for another couple of seconds before she lowers her head, and says, “Thank you for understanding about me not wanting to go out. I hope that didn’t upset you. ”
“No, not at all.” I say, shaking my head before opening my box, giving my burger a good whiff. It smells amazing. “I’m happy to do whatever you want.”
“Yeah, after the week we both had, I was just ready to be home and not run around.” She scoots her chair forward, grabs her fork and digs in. “Plus, since I work in food service, I prefer to just be home when I’m not at work.”
“I completely understand that.” She’s happily munching on her salad, but I can’t take my eyes off her. “I travel so much for hockey that I love a night in.”
“I’m glad we have that in common.” Her eyes glow with the warmth of a sunset in heaven, drawing me deeper into their depth. “So, I wanted to bring up a weird text I got from Chase.”
“Oh.” Heat flames my cheeks, as I have a sense of what she’s about to say. “Everything okay?”
“This is going to seem sort of out there, but did you say something to him?”
“Did I say something to your ex?” I glance down at my burger and then raise my attention back to her. “He’s an idiot.”
“I already know that, and learned that the hard way," she scoffs, setting her fork down, continuing, “You told him he was an idiot?”
“Not in so many words.” I tilt my head back, mulling over how much I want to disclose.
I don’t want to waste our time talking about her loser ex, but she needs to know that I said something.
Leaning back, I wipe my mouth with a napkin and drop it back to my lap.
“Look, I went over to grab Rigsby. He asked what my deal was and how our kids got connected.”
Her lips part, as if she’s holding back saying something.
It’s so hard to sit here with her looking at me like that, all vulnerable.
I reach across the table, take her hand in mine, and everything spews out, “Look, maybe it was forward of me. I’m not one of those guys with a temper that you have to worry about, but I wasn’t going to beat around the bush.
I let him know who I was and that I was getting to know you and Bella.
He seemed taken aback by it, started to blubber something, and I sort of just lost it on him. ”
“Did you threaten him?” Her lips press together. I’m not sure if that means she’s happy or mad.
“Look, I just had a concern about how he was treating you. I know you aren’t together, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have to respect you. You’re still the mother of his child.” I nod and add, “I took care of my concern.”
“I didn’t ask you to do that,” she says, her words slow. She leans forward, her hair spilling over her shoulder, framing her face in the most perfect way.
“No, you didn’t.” I don’t decipher a warning in her words, and I’m not going to lie.
“I’m not going to apologize for it. Maybe it seemed a little soon to cross that boundary, but I didn’t think so.
I’m planning to spend a lot of time with you and Bella, and she is his daughter.
” I’m not one to pour my heart out. It’s not what I do, but I do stand up for what is right and for the people I care about.
“He has a right to know who I am and my intentions.”
“Your intentions?” A sly smile sprouts on her lips as she pins her gaze on me.
“My intentions.” I hear her echo as a challenge.
My jaw locks and I stare, my muscles twitching, urging me to be honest. I don’t know any other way to say it than to be honest, and I reach my free hand out to cup her cheek.
“I’m going to treat you like the queen you are.
That means if anyone else is disrespecting you, Chase included, I’m stopping it.
I’m not about violence. I’m just all about you. ”
Her sly smile fades, making my breath quicken.
Neither of us speaks. It’s like sudden death, the tension so thick, it’s nearly boiling over.
My heart rams so hard against my chest, I’m at the point where I will ramble nonsense if I open my mouth.
I said what I needed to say. Now I wait for her to respond.
She raises her hand up, covering my hand that still rests on her cheek. Her skin is satiny, soft and smooth, and it causes my breath to hitch in my chest. All I want to do is lean over and kiss her, but she’s so still, I freeze too.
“Tell me what that means,” she whispers, “to be all about me.”
“It means, I want to memorize every smile you have. I want to sit at this table with you and eat cold take out, talking for hours about anything and everything. I want to look up and see you in the hockey stands during my games. I’m not going to make any promises I don’t intend to keep.
Maybe that’s not enough, and I know we just met each other, but I can’t stop thinking about you.
I don’t know what that means, but I want to find out. ”
She’s quiet, but her eyes fill with longing, and I know that look. It’s the one she gave me last night before I kissed her, and I’m no fool.
I slide my hand down her neck, curling my fingers to pull her close.
She doesn’t resist. Her eyes flutter shut right as my lips capture hers.
I lean forward, dragging my lips slowly over hers, wanting to consume her with all my senses.
Inhaling, I drink in her scent—indescribable.
Addicting, yet subtle. I can’t get enough of it, and I’m left breathless as I pull away before our kiss turns to anything more than sweet.
A breath shudders out of her as she stares back at me. I’m still holding her hand, and I raise it to my lips and press a chaste kiss to her knuckles, letting my lips linger for just a few seconds. None of this makes sense, but at the same time, I don’t care.