Chapter Thirteen Boyfriend
I came to, face down on the bed. The room was full of sunlight. I hadn’t slept so well in years. I felt amazing.
Then I remembered last night.
I didn’t have to move; I could feel him lying beside me, even though we weren’t touching. When I sat up, I saw him looking at me. He was giving me a sly smile and an appraising look, which I gave him right back.
“Hey,” I said.
“Hey.”
“I, uh, yeah.” Real articulate, Porter.
I leaned over and touched my mouth to his, because I felt like I’d explode if I didn’t. Kissing someone was hard when you were grinning like an idiot. I pulled back to look at him, our noses just touching.
“Do you have to work today?” I said.
“No.”
“Neither do I. I got a gig tonight, but it doesn’t start till eight thirty. We’ve got all day, Eddie.”
I kissed him again and rolled him onto his back, and he let me, and I straddled him and gazed at him lying under me, all of him, and I touched him, smoothing his T-shirt over his belly, then rumpling it.
“You’re so solid.” I kissed him again. “Are you real? Tell me I’m not dreaming.”
“You’re not dreaming.”
God, his voice. I felt it buzzing at the back of my neck and in the beds of my fingernails, and I wanted his voice in my mouth so much I kissed him again, like I was diving deep inside him, and I let my weight down onto him, and I pressed against his hip bone, and fuck, nothing in my life ever felt so good.
The whole time I was thinking that, my body was doing its own thing, and all of a sudden, it let me know I was about to shoot when it was way too late for me to stop, and I shot all over us.
I pulled back. “Sorry.”
I reached over to the bedside table and grabbed a handful of tissues from the box I hadn’t used in over a year, and I wiped him off, but... “I got it on your shirt, too.”
“It’s no big deal,” he said, grabbing the hem of his shirt.
I realized he was about to take it off, and I panicked, jumped off the bed, and turned my back to him, pulling clean clothes out of the bureau. Then I booked it into the shower. Because I didn’t want to see him with his shirt off. I couldn’t explain why—it just felt wrong.
I didn’t know what to tell him, but after I got out of the shower, dried off, and dressed, he was still in the bedroom, sitting up in bed. He hadn’t taken his shirt off, so I guess he’d figured out I didn’t want that.
I wanted to make it up to him so much. “Why don’t I make us a hot breakfast while you have a shower?” I said.
“Sure.”
In the kitchen, I made buttermilk pancakes from scratch and fried bread and bacon and scrambled eggs, and I was making fresh orange juice when he walked into the kitchen.
“Wow,” he said quietly, with a cute little eyebrow bob. “That looks good.” He sat at the table.
“You look good.” I put the pitcher of juice on the table, and then I put my hand over his heart and kissed him. His hair was still wet.
As we were eating, I said, “The weather’s nice. You want to go for a walk?”
“Sure.”
It was beautiful outside. September had taken the edge off the heat.
I was sorry summer was over, because we could have done so many things as a couple.
In the park, the leaves were rustling, and the branches of the trees creaked in the breeze, and I was walking close to him, brushing against him, and I really, really wanted to hold his hand.
This is my life now. And I never want it to end.
I felt sorry for everyone in the park who wasn’t as happy as I was right then.
We followed a path into the trees, and I looked behind me to make sure we were alone, then I put my arm around him, and he put his arm around me.
“I’m kinda excited again,” I said.
“Me too. I’m a little backed up.”
Oh, right. I’d been a selfish idiot. I hadn’t done anything for him.
Thing was, it was hard for me to believe he wanted me too. I mean, obviously he did, or he wouldn’t still be here. But on some level, I felt like he was just humoring me.
“Sorry,” I said. “You knocked me sideways so hard I didn’t think to look after you.”
“You want to do it here?” he said casually. “I could fuck you up against that tree.”
I couldn’t tell if he was serious, so I laughed.
“Or we could steal one of those paddleboats they got chained by the river,” he said, “go under the bridge, and fuck in the boat.”
“Oh.” I still wasn’t sure if he was serious. I could have checked him out, but guys didn’t check out other guys’ dicks, right? I mean, I knew we were together, but I felt like that would be invading his privacy.
“I’m hungry,” he said. “Let’s get some chips.”
Which I was pretty sure he was serious about, because there was a chip wagon up ahead. We let go of each other. I bought a carton of chips to share, and we found a bench to sit on and eat them.
“Have you actually done that?” I said. “Fucked someone up against a tree?”
“Yeah.” He ate a chip. “Came pretty hard, too.”
Now I had a picture in my head, and it was really distracting and also terrifying. “What about in a paddleboat?”
“Nope,” he said, eating another chip. “But there’s a first time for everything. The beauty is, you’re right on the water, so it’s easy to clean up after. Plus, there’s chains and ropes, if you’re into that.”
“...are you?”
He shrugged. “I’m open to it if you are.”
That was a ball in my court I didn’t know if I could hit.
“Hey,” he said. “I won’t do anything you don’t want me to do.”
“Okay.” I relaxed, and being in that frame of mind made me notice how sexy he looked eating those chips, sucking the salt off his fingertips. Then he noticed me noticing.
“What?” he said with a smile.
“You done?” I pointed at the empty container.
He handed it to me with this look in his eye. There was a garbage bin beside a shed, just inside the trees. I got up to throw the container away, and he followed me.
“Something I can do for you there, Eddie?”
He walked past me, cuffing my arm lightly. “Come on.”
I followed him to the back of the shed. As soon as we were behind it, he turned and pinned me against it.
It wasn’t scary. It didn’t hurt. He was brisk and efficient.
Like he was done fucking around. He kissed me once, hard and deep.
It was the first time he’d ever kissed me.
But he pulled back before I’d had more than a taste, leaving me gasping. It was the hottest kiss I’d ever had.
It was hard to explain, but until then, it had felt like he’d been humoring me. This was the first time he’d ever shown me how much he wanted me and how fucking competent he was. I thought I’d been turned on before, but now...
He shook me out of my daze by tugging on my arm. “Let’s go home.”
I would have sprinted home, but he was back to being chill, and he sauntered along with his hands in his pockets, like he was in no hurry.
The ride up in the elevator was painfully slow. He was giving me all this space, like he had on our first date, which he knew he didn’t need to do now.
Two can play at that game.
As soon as we were inside the apartment, I pinned him to the door. He didn’t act surprised. He was like, Yeah, this is about what I expected. He just relaxed in my grip.
I unzipped his jeans—not something I’d ever done to another guy before. His expression didn’t change. And I put my hand inside his jeans. And he couldn’t hide how hard he was. I held him for a few seconds, kind of enjoying it. Okay, really enjoying it. His breathing changed.
And then I pulled his dick out and went down on my knees, because I’d been aching to have him in my mouth for so long.
I touched my tongue to the head, rolled it over his slickness.
Then I slowly slid him into my mouth. I felt like I’d been underwater too long, and now I could finally breathe.
I’d never known so clearly that I was doing the right thing with exactly the right person.
I was going to give him the best blow job he’d ever had.
I could hear his shaky breathing, and I felt him getting harder in my mouth, and his thigh twitched under my hand.
He was usually so controlled that any little sign he gave away that showed how excited he was pretty much did me in.
I knew what my dick felt like when I was about to shoot, so I could tell when he was close, and I took him all the way in till my nose was pressed into the zipper of his jeans.
He made a coughing sound, and when he shot, it was like liquid smoke in my mouth.
I swallowed, and it filled all the empty space inside me and lit me up.
I felt it flowing through me, touching me everywhere.
I pulled off him slowly and felt his knees give, and I braced my hands against his hips as he slid down the door until he was kneeling on the floor.
He pressed his forehead against mine. The aftershocks travelled through his body and into mine.
“I love you,” I said.
“Same,” he said.
“Guess I did okay for my first blow job, huh?”
We laughed.