Chapter 3 #2
He was still singing. Man, he was really giving heartbreak. What if she just—?
“Lia!” Cal exclaimed, as if he could tell she was about to sing too, turning to her as he cradled his freshly made espresso in his hand. Espresso over ice. Wow. “I didn’t see you there.”
“And I cannot un-see you,” she said, and when Cal gave her a curious look in return, she only smiled like a loon.
His upper body was very approachable, she realized.
Like he would be the kind of guy who jogged at the same park every day, gave directions to lost ahjummas, rescued cats in trees.
Like the kind of guy who smiled at everyone who passed, just because he genuinely liked jogging in this park.
“I was just making coffee,” he said, taking a sip of said coffee. “Do you—“
“I wasn’t looking!” She really should stop lying, if only because she was someone’s ninang now, for god’s sake. “And I was just leaving, so…”
“Oh.” Was it her imagination, or did Cal look…disappointed? Like she’d just told him that pourovers weren’t her thing. They weren’t, but still. “Are you in a hurry? I can shower and get dressed in like, ten minutes and drive you—”
The urge to repeat “drive me” in a high-pitched voice out of disbelief was so strong that she needed to press her lips firmly together to stop herself. What if someone saw them? What if it became a scandal?
Nope, not delusional, Lia reminded herself. Also, he probably had other things to do, like…make an album. She had therapy to be in, a job to find, perfume shops to peruse.
“Or…not.” Cal tilted his head.
“Maybe I’m dead,” Lia said to no one in particular, remembering that Teddy had said when Lia was talking about bodily fluids at the airport. “I should go. I was going to walk to Tartine, and it takes ten minutes to get out of the apartment complex.”
“Which is why,” Cal pointed out. “I was offering to drive you.”
“Oh. No! No, no, no,” she said in varying volumes and tones (pitches? Cal would know) while literally waving him off. “Wag na.”
“Apparently,” he said, and she wondered if she was imagining that sarcasm is his voice. She was not.
She turned toward the door—she really just needed her shoes. She was about to throw the front door open when she asked. “Um, how far is Hongdae from here?”
It takes him a second to process her question.
“Far. Like you should let me drive you far.” He looked out the windows like he could glean the traffic from his high-rise condo.
He turned around, and how was it that even back muscles were sexy?
And that running in-band joke about Cal having the best butt among the three of them suddenly made perfect sense.
Mag hunos dili ka! Lia told herself. She hadn’t even had water! She wasn’t even a fan anymore!
“My car’s warm, I’m a safe driver, and I give excellent recommendations, roomie,” he said, turning again to face her, crossing his arms over his chest. And just like that, none of her usual functions seemed to be able to function. Breathing maybe. Speaking, definitely not. “Will you be—“
“I’ll be fine…roomie,” Lia reassured him. Good to know her pride had higher priority than her simping. “I’m sure you’re busy.”
“I’m not—well. We have rehearsals later. Then work sessions with Teddy. If today is Wednesday, I have a session with a vocal coach. If today is Friday, I have boxing.”
“It’s Monday.”
“Japanese lessons, then? Or was today my haircut appointment…? Whatever. Dongyeon hyung will remind me.”
“I’ve been to Hongdae before,” Lia said, because she had no idea what she could contribute to his schedule.
“There’s not much to do in Hongdae during the day these days, unless you like solo photo booths. But you get those everywhere now.” Cal shrugged. Great, he was flexing his arms now, and all she could think about was him holding a shiny red guitar. Or her. Pwede rin her.
“Really? Do the kids not hang out there anymore?” Lia asked.
The last time she was here was ten years ago, and Hongdae had felt young and electric, alive and bursting with people and cute little things.
Nothing was familiar, and it took her and Megan forever to find the churro and ice cream place. Even during the day.
Cal shrugged. “I’m sure some of them still do.
But there are other neighborhoods now, and Hongdae feels…
sanitized? College kids made small businesses cool, which attracted tourists.
Tourists attracted big corporations that took down the small businesses.
It didn’t help that the pandemic happened on top of all of that. It hasn’t really come back since.”
“People moved on.” Lia sighed, needing Cal not to see the expression on her face. “Maybe not Hongdae, then.”
Cal looked at her expectantly, like he had nothing in the world but time to help her, which she knew for a fact wasn’t true. It hadn’t even been true for her best friend, much less—anyway.
She was, however, taken aback by his insistence on being helpful.
It was a trait that she’d come up against so many times in the last twenty-four hours since she met him, but she had never assigned to him in the years that she was a CoBOLT fan.
He was magnetic and charming, great at music and funny when he was egged on.
She wouldn’t have immediately called him generous or kind.
It gave him more shape in her mind, a more solid presence than the idol she’d daydreamed up.
“I have a video call with my therapist at ten,” she heard herself say before she’d fully decided she was going to mention it.
“It’s my first psych session in a year, and I was hoping to find somewhere to do it…
not here, but also not so public? Somewhere I could maybe get a coffee first before I try to feel less emotionally constipated so I can actually function again. ”
Lia winced at that last sentence, because that hadn't been quite fair to herself. She could function, she applied for a visa for herself and for her brother without issues. She’d arranged their schedules so they could get to the airport on time, and it didn’t seem like she left anything at home.
She was functional, but she was also unravelling a little bit.
And that was a lot for a guy she just met a day before.
“You know what.” She decided, shaking her head as if to cancel all that out. “Never mind. I can take the call at a cafe or something—”
Cal held his hand out to her, like he was reaching for something.
Confused, breakfast-less and still a little sleepy, Lia…
put her hand in his. Just resting on it, like a hi-touch situation.
His fingers were rough and callused, and his hand was warm.
But then Cal surprised her even more by shifting his hand enough so he could squeeze hers, and oh.
It was so nice. There was affection in the touch, a release in the squeeze, and Lia didn’t want to let go.
But the concern in his eyes was enough to make her pull away, and so she did.
“Um, thanks,” she said, because she really had needed it. “You do that for all the saling pusa?”
“Actually, I was going to ask for your phone to pin a location on your map,” he said.
“Oh my god,” she exclaimed, shaking her head. Can her embarrassment and mortification just turn into two giant mouths and swallow her whole, thank you? “I held your hand without consent!”
“No, it’s fine!” he said, like he was the one who had done the illicit hi-touch. “Feel free to hold my hand anytime.”
“No! No, no, no,” she repeated in the same varying pitches that she’d said no to his offers to drive her just earlier. “N-no need. It’s not a hi-touch, it’s fine.”
“Hi-touch,” he repeated. “You know about—”
“Do you still want my phone, or…?”
“Yeah, sure,” he said, and Lia did her best not to duck under the table and stay there forever as she handed her phone to the KPop idol whose hand she’d squeezed for emotional comfort without his consent. “There are a lot of parks in Seoul that fit what you’re looking for.”
Parks! Of course! Of course it never occurred to someone who lived in a place with zero public spaces that a park would be perfect for her needs!
“Since you have a bit of time, you might as well visit my favorite one.”
Cal held up Lia’s phone, and the screen showed her a pinned location in the Mapo-gu district. Somewhere close to Hongdae.
“Is that…Yeonnam-dong?” Lia asked, and Cal nodded.
“The perfect spot to have a little privacy but not feel so alone. I was there for most of our hiatus. It’s nice.
” He nodded and handed her her phone back.
She noticed that he took extra care to make sure that their hands didn’t touch.
“There’s a pie shop near the park that serves good coffee, and even better pie,” he added.
“I’m sorry you’re going through a hard time right now, but… I hope the pie helps.”
“Thank you,” she said, holding her phone close to her chest because it felt like a gift, Cal sharing a little bit of himself the same way she had. She took a deep, steadying breath, letting the feeling sink in as she prepared to carry it with her. “I should get going.”
“Chalga yo,” he said, and at her confusion, followed it up with, “um, ingats.”
“Ingats,” Lia echoed, unable to stop herself from giggling. “You are a Makati boy.”
He held his index finger against his lips and gave her a little wink.
A couple of bus rides and a subway stop later, Lia found the park.
She sat, feet tired and shivering on a nearby bench and pressed her fingers to her nose—even the insides of her nose were cold.
She was from a tropical country! This concept of cold weather—god, it was 18 degrees!
—was not appealing. It was the kind of cold that seeped in no matter what she did, in her toes and the tips of her fingers.
Maybe her denim jacket wasn’t made for this kind of weather. Maybe it was just her.
You have arrived at your desired destination.
According to the map, the cafe Cal had highly recommended was right behind her.
Lia looked up and realized she had somehow wandered into the park, except the park was just about as narrow as a street.
The area was marked by tall, tall trees whose colors were turning a bright, happy yellow and a deep, crimson red.
There was a tiny stream just in front of her, water running through unhurriedly.
It was still mid-morning, so despite the chilly wind, the park bustled with people coming and going, either to start their day or to relax.
She spotted families with small children taking a stroll in the chilly autumn morning, small dogs yapping enthusiastically.
There were groups of old men with their hands clasped behind their backs, older women with perms and bright scarves, hustling to shop with their trolley baskets.
People were ambling along the dry grass or walking along the paved walkway, enjoying a lovely autumn day. Her first lovely autumn day.
It put everything in perspective for her then. She was here because she wanted to enjoy this moment, this place that she’d missed. She hadn’t meant to run into her younger self here, but that younger self led her here, to this little park in the middle of the city.
There would be enough time to live her lonely life later.
Her phone started to ring. Lia sat on a bench under one of the red maple trees with her pie and her coffee. She slipped her earbuds in and answered.
“Hi. Long time no see.”
“Hi Lia,” she said, her voice steady and kind as it had always been. “Ready to talk?”
“Yeah.” She nodded. “I’m ready.”
Cal
Hope you found the place okay! I just remembered the Dirty Latte goes really well with their citrus Earl Grey pie.
@LilacLias posted a photo
[a photo of a slice of chocolate Earl Grey pie and a dirty latte.] Delicious. Tears were shed (literally)
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