Chapter 14 #3
Cal blew her one of those happy, thrilled-to-be-here stage kisses she saw on fancams, and just like that, the leader of CoBOLT was back. He jogged backward toward the greenroom, a cocky grin on her face, and winked at her. Then he smoothly turned around and headed back.
Lia wrapped her arms around herself and took a moment to feel the rush of sadness that pulled at her. She took a deep breath. Two. Three. But the show had to go on.
“Ate?” Teddy asked as Lia made her way back to the audience pit, her brother now standing in the back.
To be fair, the room was full of people—enough for the energy to sustain its steady rising, and but not too full that it was uncomfortable.
And she had no idea what expression she had on her face, but it seemed like it gave him everything he needed to know. “Fuck. You’re sad.”
Damn it. But there was very little use hiding the truth from her little brother, because Teddy was a firm believer in ‘we listen, we don’t judge.’ Unless, of course he was with his older sisters, in which, he judged harder.
“I’m not sad.” Lia shook her head. “I just want to enjoy the show.”
She shifted where she was standing, already feeling slightly uncomfortable just standing. The house lights were dimmed but not fully off. She noticed that many of the fans were already leaning against the barriers, and others were sitting on the floor.
“They should have chairs,” Lia said, and Teddy asked her to say it again. “Not to be a tita, but I’m pretty sure the average age in this room is thirty. It wouldn’t be so un-rock and roll to give people places to sit.”
“I think they’re trying to make a point,” Teddy said, scanning the venue in an assessing way.
“I picked up a few things from the strategy meetings. Cal wanted to push the band to try going for a more indie rock image than a flashy, KPop one. So underground venues, standing rooms. They were talking about festivals, too.”
“That’s great.” Lia ignored the pang in her chest. “It makes perfect sense. You reintroduce the band as a band. They’ve been around. They know what they’re doing. But they really should have the basics down first.”
“Which are?”
“Merch for every fan event. You want your audience to always show up in something you sold them. I would say only two in every ten people are wearing official merch? I don’t blame them, their websites are all in Korean, and the translation makes no sense.
” She shook her head. And she should know, because that entire week, she’d tried.
“And light sticks! I know it’s trite, but it’s part of the branding!
I agree it makes sense to push the fact that the boys really play their instruments, but they should be able to do that on TV, too. ”
She was on a roll now. If anyone saw her, they would think she was a hater, but honestly, she was just making an unprofessional observation from someone who had worked in retail marketing strategy for ten years.
“I think that if the goal of this comeback is to get old fans to come back, then they have to keep doing what they’ve always done best. Have fun. And let people have fun along with them.”
Maybe that was why Lia had fallen out of love with them. To love CoBOLT felt like such a natural act to her—sure, I’ll stream the thing! Yes, I’ll scour the internet for fansubs! I don’t mind pirated merch, I wouldn’t know where to buy the real thing anyway!
But eventually she lost touch with that, and then they couldn’t reach her anymore. She stopped looking, and they had been impossible to find. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. But surely there was more that could have been done.
“Anyway.” She said, remembering that Cal already knew all of this, that he had the means to make it all real. “It won’t be BINJ’s job to do all of that. Not for long."
The lights dimmed completely before Lia could say anything, and a photo of the three-man band appeared on the screen.
The audience went wild around them, wrists adorned with blue scrunchies shaking as phones went up.
Lia took a photo and posted it on her socials, with a blue heart and a lightning bolt as her caption, before she tagged the band’s official account.
Losing the lights made the building’s energy feel at its peak, reaching a breaking point.
It buzzed on Lia’s skin, like a part of herself was falling away to make room for this new experience.
She held her breath. There was absolutely no moving her from this spot.
Not until she saw all three boys emerge from the back, their faces looking serious.
But it was a fragile kind of serious, like they were one pun away from breaking out into laughter.
The crowd around her cheered, and Cal raised a hand to say hello.
His eyes sparkled, with a love and happiness she’d seen him give a random old woman on the street.
While his stylist clearly tried to repair some of the damage Lia had caused, he looked a little less serious and scary.
He looked like he’d been kissed, and kissed really well. Wink wink.
The boys took their spots, Siwan testing a few notes on his bass as Soobin twirled his sticks. Cal put his beloved Fender around his neck and tested a couple of notes, pressing down on one of the many pedals in front of him.
“Yaaaa Cal hyung, JALSENGYEOSOOOO!!”
Lia didn’t register the voices yelling beside her, she was too focused on what was happening on stage.
Sound ripped through the brimming tension in the air, exploding in a way that made her heart leap in her chest. They were playing Bolt of Blue.
She knew the gritty, early 2000s opening as well as she knew the back of her hand.
Soobin started the song, hitting a steady beat.
Cal joined in on rhythm guitar, and a sessionist added layers to the lead.
Siwan joined with the bass and much to the crowd’s delight, he took over Bomseok and opened the song.
Lying awake at night
I look at the sky lonely without you
Are you here? Is it true?
Or are you lost in a bolt of blue?
Cal sang the chorus, his voice filling the space.
When they were younger, the song sounded like it was full of youthful anger and regret.
But now that they were older, Cal sang the song with a touch of longing.
Regretful still, but there was a sadness to him that was more mature.
He smiled down at the guitar, hitting a pedal with his feet and seamlessly took the guitar solo, not daring to look up at the crowd, which only pulled Lia deeper into the spell he was weaving with his hands.
CoBOLT’s recorded music didn’t do justice to how gorgeous and full Cal’s voice was live, his range from soft, intimate melodies to fully belting out his notes. There was a quality to it that a polished recording studio couldn’t capture. A raw magic that pulled her in and made her feel…alive.
“Holy fuck,” she said suddenly out loud.
“Damn they are good.” Teddy said beside her. The song reached its climax, and the vibration of Cal’s long-held note felt like it was happening in her chest. In body parts a little further down also, maybe.
He let the music hang in the air, cutting off at the last second.
Lia was at the edge of her seat (metaphorically, as she was physically still standing), unsure where he was going to take it next, and the pregnant pause was cut through by an electric guitar so crunchy and wild it was like a hot knife cutting through a block of butter.
She felt herself scream more than she actually heard it as the drums and bass came in.
“BOOOOLTS SOLIJILEEEE!!” Cal yelled. Lia knew she was yelling along, but she could barely hear herself over the excited screaming happening around her.
“Did you miss us?” Cal asked the audience in English, speaking closer to the mic so his voice was low and seductive, and the crowd grew ever wilder. Soobin was yelling something in Korean that Lia couldn’t catch, but he seemed thrilled.
It had been years since Lia saw CoBOLT perform live.
But clearly that was a grave error on her part, because the band performed a solid three-hour set, keeping the audience hyped the whole time.
And while in the past, Lia would have had to hold on to all these feelings and thoughts to herself, today she had the chance to tell Cal, the band, and anyone who would listen what it meant to her.
And she was sure that there was absolutely no way that Cal could see her. It would have been impossible, with all the lights focused on the band. But Lia pretended that he could anyway. Because what was a little delulu from a fan?
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