22. Cara
Chapter twenty-two
Cara
It took me two days to gather enough courage, but on Saturday I had made my decision and decided to face my biggest fear head on. I dropped Riley off at Parker’s house around lunch time and then I tackled my mission of doing the unthinkable: Coming clean with Ellis.
Finding out which hotel he was staying at wasn’t hard. Small-town folks loved their gossip, and a handsome millionaire staying in Brightwater was the juiciest piece of gossip since Lori Foster’s son landed a lead role in the popular historical drama show Somerset Hall .
I had lunch at the Liberty Diner because that was one of the town gossip hotspots, and sure enough, Denise, one of the servers, spilled the beans before I had even finished my order.
“I’ve heard it from my cousin Donna,” Denise said, whispering loud enough for the next table to overhear. “You know Donna, right? We had a falling out a few years ago because Wendy had told Aaron—Aaron Martins, I mean, not Aaron Green—so Wendy had told Aaron that—”
“Denise, didn’t you want to tell me about the millionaire?”
“Oh, right, the millionaire. Yes, Donna cleans at the Cascadia Bed & Breakfast, and she has seen him there in the common room several times already. She said he’s very polite. And very handsome.”
Denise winked, and I responded with a polite smile. The Cascadia Bed & Breakfast, then. Not a surprise since it was the most expensive hotel in town, so of course a man with Ellis’s funds and expectations would stay there.
I finished my meal, a fried flounder sandwich, while I mentally prepared what I wanted to tell Ellis, then I gave Denise a nice tip and drove over to his hotel.
I noticed his car in the parking lot right away, looking as shiny and impressive as ever. With sweaty palms and a racing heart, I walked into the lobby, where Jane Grant stood at the reception desk. Jane was a woman who’d managed to perfectly blend charming politeness with a haughty touch of superiority. I’d never liked her much, and the way she looked at me with pursed lips as I walked through the door did not change that.
“Hello, Jane. I’m looking for Ellis Benton.”
Jane sighed dramatically and rolled her eyes. “You and every other single woman in this town, Cara. Actually, strike single because I had an obscene number of married women show up here to catch a glimpse of Mr. Benton. I will have to hire a bouncer if that continues.”
I frowned. “Okay, sorry to hear that. Can I speak to him, please?”
“No, you cannot,” she said stiffly. “This is very inappropriate, and I will not allow Mr. Benton to be harassed by the likes of you.”
“By the likes of me?” I repeated, getting irritated quickly.
“You know what I mean. Now, would you please leave? My guests value their privacy.”
I took a deep breath to keep myself from raising my voice. “Ellis and I know each other. Just tell him my name, and he will confirm it.”
She raised an eyebrow, then snorted out a disparaging laugh. “Sure, you do.”
“I do ,” I said through gritted teeth.
“I won’t bother my guest with such nonsense. Leave my establishment before—”
“Cara!” It was Ellis. He looked surprised to see me but not unhappy about it. “I thought I had heard your voice. What are you doing here?”
I straightened my shoulders and turned toward Ellis, not before giving the aghast Jane a nasty look.
“I wanted to talk to you. Do you have time?”
“For you? Always. Do you want to take a walk?”
“Yes, that would be lovely.” I did not want to have that conversation anywhere near Jane Grant.
“Wait here. I’ll get my coat from my room real quick.”
While I waited, I felt Jane’s eyes boring into me, but I did my best to ignore her. When she realized I wasn’t volunteering any information, she decided to get nosy.
“So…” she said, suddenly sounding a lot friendlier. “How do you—”
“I’m not interested in discussing that with you, Jane. I’m sure you understand. You said it yourself. Your guests value their privacy.”
Jane exhaled indignantly, pursed her lips, and focused her attention on her guest book without saying another word, but I was sure she would pay attention to every word exchanged between me and Ellis.
To avoid fueling the fire any further, I grabbed his arm and hurried him out the door as soon as he came back down the stairs.
I relaxed a little once we had left the bed-and-breakfast, but we still had a complicated conversation ahead of us.
In awkward silence, we took a little path that led away from the hotel, toward Lake Brightwater. It was a cold but cloudless day, and the winter sun sparkled on the dark-blue water.
Gathering my courage, I took a deep breath, but Ellis stopped me before I could say a word.
“Before you start, I want to apologize,” he said.
“For disrespecting my wishes and steamrolling over my boundaries?” That came out harsher than intended, but I really was upset about that stunt, even if I was ready to make peace.
Ellis hung his head, clearly affected by my words. “Yes, that’s the core of it.”
“Do you promise to never do it again?”
He exhaled, his breath turning into a white cloud, then he shook his head. “I can’t do that. I can’t pretend like nothing happened.”
I put my hands in my pockets to hide how shaky my hands were. That was exactly what I’d been afraid of. The cat was out of the bag. Ellis knew, and since Ellis knew, it was only a question of time until his father would find out.
I had lain awake every single night since that evening at the winter festival, trying to come up with a solution to keep Riley safe, and I’d come up with two options. One was fleeing—moving to another part of the country or maybe another country entirely, changing our names, and hoping I could cover our tracks well enough to shake off Carlisle Benton. That would surely traumatize Riley for life, but it might work. The other option was coming clean with Ellis and hoping he would have my back.
“Cara, I don’t want to turn this into some kind of legal battle, but I want to be part of my son’s life.”
I could see in his face that this was hurting Ellis as much as it hurt me. We were soulmates, goddamn it, we shouldn’t be talking about taking each other to court.
I looked at him. The man of my dreams, past, present, future. I wanted nothing else in the world more than to be a family with Ellis.
It had to be the second option. A leap of faith, as Annette had called it.
“Do you want to know what happened back when I got pregnant with Riley? Do you want the true story?”
His eyes went wide. “Yes!” he said. “You know you can tell me everything.”
“You won’t like it.”
“Doesn’t matter. I just need to know the truth. I know you, Cara. I know you must have had a good reason to take such drastic measures.”
I took a deep breath, gathering all my courage. “That reason is your father.”
Ellis furrowed his brows. “Go on.”
“He found out about my pregnancy before I had the chance to tell you. You were already back at Cambridge at that point.”
“And?”
Then I told him everything: the choice Carlisle Benton had given me, the termination of rights, the boarding school plans, the threats of making up a mental health disorder to cut me out of my son’s life. About how scared I had been. And how heartbroken.
“And then Terry picked me up in Stenton, and that’s how I ended up here in Brightwater.”
Ellis exhaled deeply. He stopped and turned toward the water, looking out onto the lake. I had a feeling he was avoiding my gaze. I stepped closer and gently touched his back.
“I know it’s a lot to take in, but—”
Ellis turned around to face me again. His body was tense. “If that is true, I’ll have to talk to my father about this.”
I couldn’t believe my ears. “If that is true? Are you serious? What, do you think I made it all up?”
“Of course not, no,” he said. “But maybe… you misunderstood something in your state of mind.”
“My state of mind was just fine, Ellis. And I understood your father perfectly fine.”
“It’s just… It sounds unusually cruel, even by my father’s standards. Maybe that all came across wrong.”
“I knew it,” I whispered. “I knew you would take your father’s side.”
“I’m not taking his side. I just want to tal—”
I backed away from him, feeling fiery anger rising in my chest. “That’s why I chose my baby over you thirteen years ago. Because I knew you wouldn’t fight back against him. Not even for our sake.”
“Cara, you are being unfair. I just—”
“Go on, then. Tell your father everything I said. Ask him. But also tell him that I will never give Riley to him. I will not let your father damage my son like he has damaged you. And if you are not willing to defend him, I will.”
I had to bite my tongue before I said any more. With clenched fists, I turned around and walked away.
“Cara! Cara, come back!” Ellis yelled behind me, but I didn’t stop.
I’d already taken out my phone and was scrolling down to my lawyer’s number because I had to prepare for the fight we surely would face once Carlisle Benton found out about all this.