Chapter Fourteen
While Razor’s talk with Ashton eased her mind about being a burden, it didn’t spare her the freak-outs every time an unknown number popped on her phone or a spam email showed in her inbox.
She’d gotten better at compartmentalizing the issue and was able to focus during practice, but every now and then the thought of what she would say to the FBI would seep in, and she’d regress.
Now here she was, on the verge of their first midweek home series, and instead of focusing on the game, her mind swung between relief and disappointment.
Relief the FBI hadn’t reached out. Disappointment they didn’t see her as a viable witness to the deplorable things Gary did.
She was just too much of a risk, she thought, as she warmed up in the bullpen.
At least this didn’t require a lot of brain power. Literally she caught the ball and threw it back, which allowed her to get in the game mindset.
“Make sure she works on her curve. It’s been absent lately.”
The voice, so powerful and affirming, made Razor smile.
That same voice had comforted her, reassured her that she wasn’t a bad person.
She turned her head and she couldn’t stop her grin from growing.
Ashton leaned against the gate, relaxed and smiling.
Razor never got tired of seeing Ashton’s attention directed at her, and suddenly all her tension from the last two days melted away.
A sense of calm washed over her just from that one smile.
She wondered how Ashton was able to soothe her troubled mind with so little effort.
Suddenly, that smile morphed into a thin line of concern, and Ashton’s eyes widened in fear.
Before Razor could ask what was wrong, she felt the hard thwack of the ball on the side of her helmet.
Pain seeped into her temple, and she stumbled backward onto the dirt.
“Oh shit!” Summer yelled.
Razor took off her helmet and squeezed her eyes shut, willing the dizziness to subside. When she opened them, a hand swept softly across her bangs.
“Are you okay?”
Ashton’s voice was laced with worry. Concerned hazel eyes came into focus.
“What happened?”
Summer laughed. “My guess is you took your eye off the ball.”
“Summer, not now,” Ashton said. “Stay right here, I’ll go grab an ice pack.”
Ashton left before Razor could protest. She felt her forehead and winced at the bump starting to form.
“Good thing for helmets,” Summer quipped, a smile on her face.
“Good thing it wasn’t your fastball.”
“Uh, yeah it was.”
Razor shrugged. “Eh. Could’ve fooled me. I should be unconscious right now.” She slowly stood and stretched her back out.
“Why are you standing up?” Ashton scolded when she returned, pressing the ice pack gently to Razor’s head.
“Ashton, I’m fine. Nothing the ice and a couple ibuprofen won’t fix.”
“Don’t be so stubborn. Let me see your eyes.”
Razor stood stock-still while Ashton checked her pupils, trying her best not to lean in to the hand holding her cheek.
“Everything looks okay, but I’ll go grab the trainer just to be safe.”
“That’s not necessary,” Razor said, but Ashton had already headed back to the dugout.
Summer’s laughter grew and Razor turned.
“What’s so funny?”
“You.” Summer snorted. “You were totally checking her out. That’s why the ball hit you.”
“Maybe I was.”
“Razor and Coach Sharpe, sitting in a tree,” Summer sang, and then she stopped. “Oh my God. Razor…Sharpe. Razor Sharpe.”
Razor punched her in the arm playfully, and she stopped just as Ashton returned with the trainer and Courtney in tow.
“Oh, come on.” Razor groaned. “I’m fine. Honest.”
“Not that I don’t trust your assessment,” Courtney said, “but I’d like someone with medical training to weigh in. We’re kind of short on catchers right now, and I can’t afford to lose you.”
Razor threw up her hands and stood impatiently while the trainer checked her pupils again and administered a few other concussion tests before concluding she was fit for play.
Courtney slumped in relief, then composed herself and said, “Team meeting in ten.”
Razor gave a thumbs-up as Courtney and Ashton left. She blushed a little when Ashton looked back and swiped a hand across her forehead in a whew gesture.
“You know it’s okay, right?” Summer said.
“Of course I’m okay. I’ve been saying that,” Razor replied.
“No, I mean, it’s okay with me…that you’re gay.”
The serious tone stopped Razor from making a quick joke.
“I appreciate that. I kind of figured you were okay with it.”
“Why’s that?”
“You play a sport where you can’t throw a ball a hundred feet without hitting a lesbian. If you’re not okay with it, you’re playing the wrong game.”
Summer smirked.
“What?”
“Then I must be an elite pitcher. I hit you in less than fifty.” She stuck out her tongue and barely missed Razor’s punch to her shoulder.
“You little shit,” Razor said, laughing. “Let’s get a few of those curveballs in like Coach Sharpe wanted.”
Summer walked to the other end of the bullpen laughing at her own joke. Razor took up her position. For the first time in two days, she felt loose.
* * *
Ashton stood at the railing. Her heart felt like it wanted to pound out of her chest. Two outs, bottom of the seventh, tied ball game, the winning run on third—the dream scenario for any player, but the terror on Harper’s face said she wanted to be anywhere except that batter’s box.
After a decisive 6–1 victory in game one against the Rogers State Tigers, the second game of the doubleheader was a true pitchers’ duel.
Summer matched the Tigers’ pitcher, Ashley Gonzales, stride for stride.
Both allowed few hits and even fewer runs.
In the third inning, the Tigers broke open scoring with a solo home run over the left field fence.
The Hornets did their best to answer in the bottom of the inning when Razor hit a leadoff double and Emery drew a walk, but Gonzales struck out the next three batters.
In the sixth inning, the Tigers doubled their lead with another home run.
With six outs remaining, the Hornets looked to be shut out, but Razor answered with a home run of her own, cutting the deficit in half.
In the top of the seventh, Summer struck out all three batters.
The Tigers were three outs away from splitting the series.
The bottom of the Hornets’ lineup was due up, and they hadn’t fared well against Gonzales all day.
Ashton sighed heavily and sent up a silent prayer.
Sabrina led off with an infield single. Tori then laid down a sacrifice bunt to get her to second.
Ashton’s heart sank when Heidi struck out on three pitches, leaving the Hornets with one out, but they’d done enough to turn their lineup over and give them a chance.
As Hannah strolled to the plate, Courtney got Ashton’s attention.
“I’m thinking of putting in a pinch hitter for Emery,” she whispered.
“Yeah, she’s struggled against Gonzales all day.”
“I just don’t know who to use.”
“Put in Harper,” Razor said from behind them.
“Harper? Are you sure?” Courtney asked.
Razor nodded. “I’ve been working with her. She’s got this.”
Courtney looked at Ashton. “What do you think?”
Ashton thought on it for a moment, but before she could formulate her response, cheers rang up and all three charged the rail.
“What happened?” Razor asked.
Summer jumped up and down. “The third baseman threw the ball into right field. Hannah advanced to third and Sabrina scored. We’re tied!”
Razor high-fived Summer, then turned back to Courtney. “Well, Coach, what do you say?”
Courtney smiled and peered around Ashton. “Harper, grab a bat. You’re pinch-hitting.”
Harper’s eyes widened as cheers went up in the dugout. She turned to grab a bat and helmet while Courtney went to talk to the umpire. Ashton leaned in to Razor and whispered, “She’s shaking.”
“She can do this. She will do this.”
A strange tingle fluttered in Ashton’s stomach at the conviction in Razor’s voice. She called Harper over and settled her hands on the catcher’s shoulders.
“Nervous?” Razor asked.
“Terrified.”
“Good. I’d be worried if you weren’t. Just remember how we practiced. All those clutch scenarios I threw at you. This is no different. Deep, calming breaths. Keep your heart rate down. If you see a pitch you like, swing. If you don’t, let it go. Don’t worry if it’s a strike.”
Harper nodded and gulped.
“We’re tied now,” Ashton said. “Don’t worry about getting out. If you do, we’ll get them in extra innings.”
Harper took a deep breath, then walked to home plate. Ashton and Razor climbed up to the rail to watch. Harper took her position in the batter’s box and waited for Gonzales to hurl the ball over the plate.
“Strike.”
Ashton’s pulse increased. The second pitch came quickly and caught Harper off guard, causing her to swing wildly.
“Strike two!”
“Step out, step out, step out,” Razor mumbled.
As if Harper heard the chant, she stepped out of the batter’s box and took long, even breaths.
Ashton gazed at Razor. She looked more nervous than Harper, her leg bouncing on the step.
Ashton laid her hand on Razor’s thigh, and her head whipped around, confused.
Ashton smiled, and Razor returned it. This was Harper’s moment.
Gonzales delivered the pitch. Harper swung and made light contact. As if in slow motion, the ball dribbled slowly toward third, and Harper ran down the line. Hannah took off for home. The third baseman charged the ball and picked it up with her bare hand, but she hesitated, unsure where to throw.
Razor leaned over the railing and yelled, “Go, Harper!”
Harper sprinted to the bag as the third baseman made up her mind to throw to first. But it was too late. Harper planted her foot on the front side of the base right before the ball hit the back of the glove.
“Safe!”
The entire team ran out of the dugout and swarmed Harper, screaming and laughing.
Harper smiled and laughed with them. Summer hugged Harper’s neck and planted multiple kisses on her cheek.
Ashton laughed and clapped her jubilation, even turning to hug Courtney, who had tears of joy in her eyes.
And who could blame her? They’d won, and it was all thanks to Harper.
When their personal celebration subsided, everyone gathered in the outfield for the postgame meeting.
“Congratulations, ladies. We are now three wins above even,” Courtney announced.
Applause erupted. Ashton looked over at Razor, who was clapping vigorously and sporting the biggest smile she’d ever seen.
“I think we all know who gets the game ball today,” Courtney said. A chorus of yeahs and chants of Harper erupted. “Great job today, ladies. I will see you at practice tomorrow, and don’t forget our big series this weekend with the reigning conference champs.”
The team did a final chant of Hornets, then dispersed back to the dugout.
Ashton lagged with Courtney and Nancy, but her eyes immediately found Razor, who was horsing around with Harper, putting her in a headlock and giving her a vigorous head rub.
Then Summer ran up and hugged Harper tightly, laughing loudly as they all gathered their gear.
Ashton felt joy in seeing the camaraderie, but also a tinge of jealousy.
She wished she could be that affectionate with Razor.
She’d been able to get away with the light, fleeting touches because they came in moments of comfort and concern.
Any affection she showed in the same way Summer and Harper offered…
well, Ashton couldn’t do it. Because she knew it’d mean more. And she wouldn’t cross that line.
Laughter bubbled out of her when Razor lifted Harper and ran around the dugout before dumping her at the top of the stairs. Summer went out and helped Harper up while Razor grabbed all their gear and exited the dugout. She made eye contact with Ashton across the field and gave a small wave.
“I guess it was inevitable.”
Ashton turned and saw Nancy. Her jaw was set, arms crossed.
“Excuse me?”
She nodded in Razor’s direction. “Just be careful, Ashton. I’d hate to see either one of you get hurt if you decide to pursue anything.”
Ashton sighed and looked between Nancy and Razor, who stood next to the dugout, talking to Summer. There was no point in denying it. But it didn’t mean she had to reveal her feelings to Nancy. So she deflected.
“I have a lot of respect and compassion for Razor. After what she went through in San Diego, she deserves only good things.”
“Is one of those good things you?” Ashton’s anger rose. Nancy must’ve sensed her ire because she backpedaled. “I’m sorry. That was uncalled for. You’re right, she does deserve happiness.”
Ashton didn’t know if it was Nancy’s snide remark, or the half-hearted apology, but the issue she’d tabled since Memphis suddenly jumped right up.
“Why didn’t you help her?”
Nancy looked around. “Help who? When?”
“Razor. When she went up against Gary. Why didn’t you help her then?”
Nancy rolled her eyes. “I explained this to you already. I went to the proper people in the administration, but with no evidence they didn’t move forward.”
“No, I’m talking about after Gary was cleared. Why weren’t you there to support her when everyone else turned their back on her?”
Nancy’s confusion morphed into irritation. “Be careful, Ashton. Don’t start throwing around accusations when you don’t know the whole story.”
She stalked away, leaving Ashton befuddled in the middle of left field.