Epilogue – Leon #2
“It is pretty hard to stay angry at each other when you’re struggling just to remain upright,” James said, attempting to right himself only for the couch to push him more thoroughly into Leon’s side.
“A good snuggle can also solve a lot of problems,” Leon said, thinking back on all those sleepless nights after Hailey’s accident and the few nightmares he still had, usually after Hailey went back to school after a long break.
“That’s actually a great place to start. We’re going to have three sessions together, which is less than some of my other clients, but also more than most people have, so, given that, here’s what I propose we do.”
Katherine went on to explain how they were going to use today’s session to identify three areas they would like to focus on: one area where they were struggling, one where they were doing okay but could use some feedback, and one area they were knocking out of the park and wanted to keep being fucking amazing at.
Obviously, those were Leon’s words, not Katherine’s.
Leon already suspected what the three areas would be, which is why he wasn’t surprised when James brought up wanting to find a way to better support Leon with his ADHD at home.
“James is being hard on himself. He’s been amazing, I’m just switching meds and having a bit of a rough patch,” Leon said.
“Tell me a little more about that,” Katherine said, her pen flying across her paper at a speed even Aspen would be jealous of.
Leon explained that the meds he’d been taking weren’t working as well as they once had, and with a promotion at work and all the wedding planning going on, he was beginning to struggle with some day-to-day tasks, and a lot of it was falling on James.
“It makes me feel guilty and puts me in a sort of shit mood, which then makes James want to help, but he doesn’t know how, which makes me feel even worse and has led to some of our worst arguments as a couple.
I’m trying to work on it with my therapist, but we thought maybe that was something we could discuss here? ” Leon finished.
“Wonderful,” Katherine said, nodding her head like a therapeutic bobble head. “What else?”
“I want to be better prepared for supporting James through his mom and her partners getting older, but I think that means James needs to figure out what kind of support he wants from me, too,” Leon said, which was not something they’d discussed in advance, but something that had been weighing on him ever since Howard’s health scare.
James shifted, resting a hand on Leon’s leg, and the couch pushed them somehow even closer together.
“Aging parents and relatives are a very common point of stress in a marriage,” Katherine said, flipping a page in her notebook, somehow seeming to continue writing even as the page turned.
“That’s…a little hard for me to talk about,” James said, his thumb absently rubbing over the seam in Leon’s jeans.
“I know, love. And we don’t have to solve everything in these three meetings. I just thought maybe it was time for me to bring it up.”
James buried his face in Leon’s shoulder, but after a few moments of the only sound being Katherine’s pen scratching on paper, James nodded.
“I think our sex life is fucking amazing, though,” Leon said, and James made a very loud choking noise.
“So is our co-parenting of the cats, our social life, and our work-life balance. Even during what’s usually our busiest season this last year, we still came home and spent a good chunk of quality time together every night. I hope we can continue all of that.”
James nodded again, tilting his head to look at Katherine, but keeping his cheek pressed against Leon’s pec. “I also think our communication, excluding the few things we’ve mentioned, is better than ever. It sort of has to be to plan a whole wedding.”
“I’m not surprised by that,” Katherine said, marking something else down in her notebook before looking up at them.
“Even that first day, you two seemed to be figuring out your communication style. As soon as you opened up to each other, took that risk, and let yourselves be vulnerable, it was like night and day in how you spoke to each other.”
Leon swallowed, the balloon in his chest rising into his throat.
There was one more thing he wanted to bring up, but despite James and Katherine’s praise, it still wasn’t easy being vulnerable. Even after all this time.
“I think the last thing I wanted to talk about is…I mean, if we have time, either today or next week, or…” Leon’s fingers flexed against the pilled fabric of the sofa. He could just barely feel the loose threads as his fingers tingled and shook.
James sat up, with a fair amount of effort, pushing against Leon’s legs and side until he was semi-upright.
Their faces were only an inch or so apart, and Leon could smell the toothpaste on his breath.
He’d insisted on brushing his teeth before they left the house, one of the many quirks Leon had learned about James over the past two years.
Just like he’d learned that James always put his left shoe on before his right, he organized the pantry from back to front, and he was absolutely incapable of folding a fitted sheet.
Not that Leon knew how to fold a fitted sheet.
Not that Leon folded his sheets at all.