Chapter Thirty-five
Jesse stood backstage gazing at Evan on stage preparing to perform as soon as the show came back from commercial.
A soft smile rested on Jesse’s lips, a smile that had been present since he and Evan vowed their eternal commitment to each other.
Now as he stood watching his beautiful partner get ready to sing before millions of eyes that would gaze upon him in adoration, one thought filled his mind; Evan was his, and only his.
It didn’t matter how many people screamed their undying love and devotion to Evan, because Evan knew the one who held it truly was just a few feet away.
As if thinking the same thing, Evan glanced at him and threw him a smile and a wink. Jesse blew him a kiss. Evan laughed and looked away as JJ walked up to ask him something.
Julian stepped to Jesse’s side. “We haven’t gotten to see much of you two these past few days since you’ve been holed up in your hotel room together, but it appears you both haven’t missed a beat in picking up where you left off.”
“We haven’t, but I suppose that’s to be expected. It wasn’t like we broke up over something bad. It happened because Ev was trying to protect me, and I left for the same reason toward him. It’s hard to hold a grudge against good intentions, even if they were misunderstood.”
Brandon tossed his arm around Jesse’s shoulder. “You almost sounded like an adult there. It’s kinda weirdin’ me out.”
Jesse chuckled and shook his head.
Kenny quit fiddling with his black and white Fender Stratocaster hanging from a black leather strap over his shoulder. “Then we’ll be hitting the road with him for sure?”
“Yeah.”
“That’s going to be so kickass,” Kenny said. “The arenas he plays are crazy huge, and we’ll get to run all over the world. I’m really glad now that you gave it up to him to get our contract.”
“How many times do I have to tell you I didn’t do it for that!” Jesse laughed.
“What’s going to happen when you guys come off the road?” Brandon asked. “Are you going to live together again?”
“Yeah. The media’s never discovered where the house is.
Even if they do find out, they can’t prove we’re living together.
They wouldn’t be able to get down the private road unless someone parked and walked around the first gates, and then security cameras would catch them, and they’d never make it past the second gates and wall, so we think we’ll be pretty safe. ”
Julian asked, “Then you’re going to continue to keep things secret?”
“For now.”
Kenny got an apprehensive look. “For now?”
“We decided to appease Greg by not openly admitting anything for a little while longer, but we’re not going to deny rumors either. We just won’t comment on them.”
“But then you’re leaving people to believe the rumors are true,” Julian said.
“Which is fine. It’ll be less of a shock for when we feel the time is right to openly confess our relationship.
” Jesse realized that out of everyone, Trish had yet to say a word.
He hadn’t talked to her much since Christmas, or to anyone since he had been so focused on hoarding Evan all to himself, but when they were around her, she was fairly quiet, and he wondered if she still harbored a grudge against Evan for his actions toward Jesse.
He made a mental note to get some one-on-one time with her and tell her it was fine to treat Evan normally.
He glanced at her standing behind him. “You okay?”
Trish stared at him for a moment, then nodded. “Yeah. I think I’m still in shock that we just played for pretty much the whole country.”
“I know,” Jesse said with a contented sigh. “And I looked so damn good on camera, too.”
“Well, get ready Captain Pretty Boy or else you’ll miss your cue,” Kenny said.
Jesse turned his attention to the stage.
The stage lights flashed on with blinding brilliance, flames shot up in a quick blast from the pyrotechnics at the front of the stage, all timed perfectly to Evan’s band launching into the hard driving rock track, “Addiction.” Evan walked toward the front of the stage as if it and the entire world belonged to him, and let his baritone blast out,
“You’re in my mind,
You’re in my soul,
You’re everywhere.
I just can’t get away.
There’s no help for me.
But how I love this torture so sweet,
The ghost of your memory,
Haunting me.
I feel you there,
When I close my eyes.
This addiction,
It’s left me weak and sore,
But I don’t want to the cure,
It’d mean not having you anymore.
This addiction,
It’s pounding in my brain,
But oh how I love the pain,
Breaking my body down again,
This addiction…”
Just as Jesse prepared to step on stage with Kenny to join JJ in the guitar solo, Evan raised his left hand and dropped it down in a swift motion.
The entire band stopped playing, the stage lights blackened.
Jesse snapped his head around to look at Kenny, but Julian sprinted past him toward the stage, aiming for a black grand piano.
“Surprise,” Julian chuckled as he trotted by.
“Surprise?” Jesse said, his eyes back on Kenny.
Kenny flicked his head toward the stage. “Get ready.”
Through the darkness Evan’s voice rose pure and celestial with no instruments to interfere,
“I yelled for you as you walked away,
My voice a whisper…in the crowd…
And I watched our memories fall with the rain,
Breaking…on the ground…
I want to take it all away,
And believe the truths in the dark.
I want to live the fantasy,
The sweet delusion,
And keep you in my arms...”
Jesse gasped at Evan singing “Shattered.” He stood motionless, listening and watching as the piano added its voice to Evan’s after the fourth line and the stage lights turned to a soft golden glow with a single spotlight illuminating Evan.
The crowd had exploded at the first line, but now sat silent, mesmerized.
“Alright, go.” Kenny poked Jesse on the back with the head of his guitar.
Jesse stumbled forward, clueless as to what to do.
This wasn’t what they had rehearsed. He and Evan were supposed to duet on “Addiction.” There was never any mention of “Shattered.” He took a breath and walked on stage, hoping he didn’t look completely confused.
Another spotlight shone down on him, and for a second time, the crowd erupted with a deafening roar.
Evan turned toward him as he came to the end of the chorus,
“Take my hand,
Pull me out,
Please save me.
I’m shattering,
Breaking…”
Evan wrapped his arm around Jesse’s shoulders as the piano interlude took over. He put his lips to his ear. “You’ve got the next verse, and I’ll join you on the chorus.”
Jesse nodded and slipped his arm around him. Kenny and JJ joined their guitars with the piano. Jesse took a breath and lifted his tenor,
“Now I’m sitting all alone in the darkness.
Listening for your voice in the silence.
All I have left are illusions and dreams.
Your phantom body lying next to me.
Another memory trickles down my cheek,
And I slip a little bit more…”
Evan tightened his grip around Jesse. They raised their voices together, blending them as one in perfect harmony,
“What can I do?
Don’t leave me to drown,
In these shattered memories.
I want to scream,
But I can’t breathe,
I’m falling away.
Can’t you see,
That I’m alone,
And I’m slipping away?
I can’t stop myself.
Can’t catch myself.
Take my hand
Pull me out,
Please save me.
I’m shattering,
Breaking…”
As the song finished, they bowed in unison to the screaming audience. Together, they walked offstage.
Jesse turned to Evan with a glowing smile. “I can’t believe you did that!”
“It was the only right thing to do. After all, ‘Shattered’ is the more popular song right now, and for your set earlier, Greg made you play ‘Euphoria’ because it’s more upbeat.”
“You’re so sneaky,” Jesse chuckled. His soft laugh slowed as he looked into Evan’s eyes. “Thank you.”
“Anything for you, gorgeous.”
Kenny jogged up and slapped Jesse on the upper arm, forcing him out of his trance. “Come on. We’ve gotta head over to the other stage and get ready for the finale.”
“Alright.” Jesse turned to Evan. “Shall we?”
Evan draped his arm around Jesse’s shoulders. “Let’s go.”
? ? ?
The crowd chanted the countdown to midnight. The ball crept lower, foot by foot. It touched down to raucous shouts and blasting fireworks. Confetti rained, and on the main stage, a crowd of famed performers lit into “Auld Lang Syne.”
Jesse switched off the TV. Silence filled the hotel room. He turned in Evan’s arms and found his lips in a long, sensual kiss. Evan pulled him tight against him, took a step back, and fell backward on the bed behind them.
Jesse laughed and braced himself up so Evan could slide higher on the bed. He crawled with him and lowered his body down on top of him. He stroked Evan’s hair, his eyes shining with joy. “Happy New Year.”
Evan caressed Jesse’s cheek with the backs of his fingers. “Happy New Year.”
A mischievous smirk played on Jesse’s lips. “So, how long do you think it will take the paparazzi to notice we’re the only ones who weren’t on stage?”
“Considering our performance earlier, I’m sure their little fingers are already flying across their keyboards. Do you care?”
“No.” Jesse stretched his left hand out and took Evan’s left hand. “It doesn’t matter what they say, because we’re stronger together than we are apart, and together, side by side, we’ll conquer anything that tries to come between us.”
Evan squeezed Jesse’s hand, pressing their rings together. “I love you, Jess. Everything I am, everything I’ll ever be, will always be yours.”
“I love you too, Ev. I always will. My future only exists so long as you’re with me.”
Evan embraced him stronger, and Jesse lowered his head, touching his lips to his once again.