Chapter Sixteen #2
“Here,” he said, brushing past her and opening the fridge to grab a few beers. “And let me take that,” he said, almost demandingly, and took the glass she was holding. “Follow me.”
As she walked behind him, a sense of nervousness came over her.
They had certainly become friendlier over the past couple of months, but Cierra was still unsure of how familiar or professional she should be around him.
Were they really friends? Or was she just a cheerful baking background character in the movie of his life?
His sister-in-law also happened to be her meal ticket, and Cierra was wary of doing anything that could upset her.
Zelda seemed suspicious of outsiders, or any woman who seemed the least bit opportunistic; the conversation in the kitchen earlier in the day had made that clear.
Still, Cierra followed him out the back door.
There was no harm in talking, and she wanted to soak in as much of the property as she could before they left the following day — even its midnight offerings.
They walked past the pool and into a clearing further down the lawn, close to where the property line met the woods.
Downhill, the porch light was no longer in view.
“Have you been here before?” Cierra asked, as he obviously seemed familiar with the territory.
“Oh, yeah, Elliot and I came here as kids almost every summer with family friends. Now we come with Zelda. And whoever else happens to be around, really.”
“Do you ever get tired of sharing the space?”
Erik laughed. “Have you seen how big that thing is?” He cracked open one of the beers. “No, it’s nice having the place full of people.” After opening the other for Cierra, they tapped their cans together amicably.
On the soft ground, Cierra rolled the flannel shirt she’d been wearing into a make-shift pillow and lay down.
The night sky was illuminated by a half-moon, still bright enough to make out small clouds and plenty of stars.
Beside her, Erik leaned back on his elbows, looking so natural in his pose it was as if he had grown out of the ground.
True to his word, the pair relaxed and sipped on their lagers, periodically mumbling something about the trip or plans they had once they arrived back in New York.
Erik told her about how he had tried one of her recipes (and was, of course, very impressed).
Occasionally, during lulls in conversation when they’d look to the sky or out towards the black forest outlines, she thought she’d caught him glancing at her.
And when she did, instead of turning away, she felt heat radiating from her core.
Her heart would beat just a bit faster under his stare, which surprised her.
But it was dark, and he could have been looking at anything, really.
“So, what’s keeping you up?” Cierra asked. They had to have been out there for at least an hour.
Letting out a sigh, Erik grinned slightly before his expression went back to something more pensive. “I’m a night owl.”
“Mm. I’m more of a morning person.”
“That tracks.” He took another swig and then turned to face her.
“Nah, it’s a mix. I mean, I do stay up late.
But I guess if something is bothering me, or if I have something on my mind, I can’t get it out of my head until I’ve explored what feels like every little angle of it.
” He made a circular motion with his pointer finger near his temple.
“Once it’s late, the racing thoughts just go into overdrive sometimes. ”
Cierra took another drink of her beer and frowned. “Sounds like a bad habit for a night owl.”
He laughed. “Yeah, not the best.” Instead of elaborating on Cierra’s question, he asked, “What about you? What’s going on in that big mind of yours?”
She twisted her mouth. “It probably sounds immature, or simple or whatever, but sometimes I just want things to be easy. And they feel that way here. I think that’s why I don’t want to leave.”
“Are things not easy right now?”
Cierra shifted her hands. While she was mildly cautious of oversharing, she wasn’t worried about being perceived as “too much” around Erik.
They talked all the time, and during this conversation she came to realize how much they really had become friends.
This wasn’t some guy she needed to worry about impressing romantically, like Julian.
She could just be herself. He was attractive and kind, sure.
But even if she had feelings for Erik, it’s not like anything would come of it.
“Not really, no.”
“Boy problems?”
With a reluctant smirk, Cierra threw some torn up grass at Erik and sighed. “Not a problem anymore, if that says anything. I’m beginning to think I’m doomed when it comes to relationships.”
“Things can always change,” Erik said, his gaze focused on her in a way she hadn’t seen before.
“You have so much to offer, Cierra. I think I’ve spent enough time with you to know you shouldn’t waste a second on anyone who doesn’t make you feel that way.
” Her breath caught at his words, the way he said them as he looked at her.
No, he couldn’t . . .
“What happened between you and Nadine?” she asked hurriedly, shifting the attention back toward him and breaking their trance. “Is that why you seemed down earlier this morning?”
Erik sighed, rubbing his chin. “Like I said, she wasn’t what I was looking for.”
“But you two seemed so great together.”
“Maybe that was the issue. I think we were better on paper than in practice. But I’m past the point of checking off boxes, you know?
I want someone who’s passionate, someone who inspires me.
A partner. She wasn’t it.” Again, there was a deafening pause, although Cierra and Erik looked straight into each other’s eyes.
He was clearly trying to tell her something, but it just didn’t seem like it was possible.
Erik Lawson, the same man who just turned down someone like Nadine, couldn’t be seriously interested in her.
Cierra had unwittingly leaned closer to him throughout their conversation and felt keenly aware of their close proximity.
Then, suddenly, she recalled how Julian had looked at her just a couple of weeks ago in what felt like a similar way.
Deep eye contact with intoxicating words.
Is this what men did? Made you feel special and seen only to set a distance at their first chance?
Her recent love life setback snapped her back to reality.
Looking around, she swatted at her legs. “I think the mosquitoes are eating me alive. Do you think we should head back?”
“Funny, I didn’t feel anything,” Erik said, but stood up all the same. “But I guess we should try to get some sleep, anyway.”
He helped her up from the grass, and the two quietly made their way into the mudroom, where they slipped off their shoes, giggling at the small bumps and noises they inevitably made.
Cierra looked up at him, not realizing until now just how tall his stature was. His hazel eyes gleamed in the nighttime light. God, he really was handsome.
He caught her stare and, after a few moments, raised his right hand to her cheek, outlining the shape of her jaw. Cierra closed her eyes, and against her better judgement, let her cheek rest in his hand, giving Erik the go-ahead he desperately wanted to proceed.
Not everything has to be serious, she told herself. Being caressed by him just felt too good.
Wrapping his hand behind her neck, he leaned in, his breath landing on her sensitive ear.
“What do you want, Cierra?”
With those words, an electric pulse seared through her core.
She slightly bent her neck, their cheeks grazing each other.
“I . . . I . . .” she began, but was quickly immobilized by his hands returning to her body, one now wrapping behind her lower back and the other at the base of her neck, tilting her head upwards.
“When I was quiet this morning,” he said in a low, almost gravelly voice, “I was thinking about what I was gonna do. About you.” He paused and pulled his head back, ever so slightly, leaving enough space to look into her eyes.
“It wasn’t right for me to keep dating Nadine.
Not when the thoughts I kept having about you didn’t stop. ”
Her lips trembled, but she didn’t dare move. “Erik . . .”
“Yes, Cierra . . .”
She again went silent, letting the sensation of his touch take over.
“Cierra . . .” he crooned, not advancing further, “I won’t do anything you don’t want. But I need you to tell me. Is this happening?”
And in that moment, she was fully present. She wasn’t thinking about being snubbed by Julian or her Plated application or her conversation with Zelda. All she could think was that she didn’t want this moment to end.
“Yes,” she replied.
He grabbed both sides of her face, kissing her forehead and nose before slowly kissing her deeply on the lips. Her eyes closed as she let him envelop her in the kitchen, trying her best to keep quiet.
“You were killing me today by the pool, you know that?” Erik grabbed her ass and hoisted her onto the countertop, taking off his sweater to act as a cushion between her and the cupboards.
Their bodies ground against each other as his hands roamed down her collarbone to her full breasts.
“Cierra.”
“Mmm,” she moaned.
“Grab onto me.”
As she wrapped her arms around his back, he greedily pushed her dress upward, unbuckling his belt while resuming his attention on her breasts and biting her neck softly.
Trying her best to suppress her moans, she breathed hard into his shoulders.
With a smile of satisfaction, he wrapped both arms around her waist as she did the same with her legs around his back. The only sounds from the room were sighs of ecstasy, and the backdrop of the nighttime symphony.