Chapter 26
It’s the longest week of my life.
I miss Max.
Being here, in his space, without him, has been absolutely brutal.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve loved it. I used my unexpected time off to enjoy the rooftop pool, working out in the state-of-the-art gym, and showering in his steam shower. I didn’t have to move any of my products into his bathroom because he did that before he left for New Orleans.
Max moved me out of my bathroom and into his.
My clothes are still in the guest room closet, but if I had to guess, I’d say he probably didn’t want to mess anything up with my organization.
Taking a handful of products from one shower to another is easy to do.
He even moved my makeup over. I didn’t have the heart to ask him why my clothes were still in my closet, though.
Even better was the fact that he left a bottle of his cologne on the nightstand by my side of the bed. A note beneath it said, “Spray it when you miss me, and it’ll be like I’m holding you.”
Excuse me, sir, but when did you get such romantic game?
Fortunately, the Piggie Pets group chat has kept me busy with overall chaos and shenanigans, because learning about guinea pig genitalia was not on my bingo card for this summer.
Cassie
Alright, which one of your asshole husbands told Gabe we needed another guinea pig?
Becca
I don’t think I’m going to answer that question.
Cassie
Listen. I love you, Becca. You’re amazing. But I’m making you a widow by next week.
Becca
That’s a tad harsh. One guinea pig isn’t a big deal.
Cassie
IT WASN’T JUST ONE CRITTER, REBECCA!
Cassie
Wait. Becca is short for Rebecca, correct?
Becca
Sigh. Yes.
Becca
How many did he come home with?
Cassie
We now have six. SIX FUCKING GUINEA PIGS. Our cage was built for ONE. One varmint was enough. NOW THERE ARE SIX SCREAMING RODENTS KICKING SHIT ALL OVER MY HOUSE.
Audrey
Oh, thank God. I thought it was only my group that did that. Well, it’s really only one of them. The rest are fairly well-behaved.
Me
Mine rarely kick anything out of their cage. Is it possible they’re bored?
Cassie
Hold on, let me ask them.
Cassie
OH, WAIT, THEY’RE FUCKING GUINEA PIGS, LAYLA, THEY DON’T SPEAK.
Me
Oh, I’m sorry.
Cassie
No, I’m sorry. I don’t know you well enough to allow my crazy to show just yet. I’m in a mood and want to complain.
Me
Alright. Here, I can participate. THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS DID WHAT TO YOUR HOUSE?
Cassie
Oh, I like you.
Audrey
Don’t encourage her, Layla. Sometimes she’s a tad feral.
Becca
In her defense, going from one pig to six is a bit of an adjustment. I married Jacob before I knew about the pigs. I wasn’t prepared. It’s a lot of shrieking. Them, not me.
Becca
Honestly, I might have shrieked some, too. I can’t remember.
Cassie
We don’t even know if they’re all girls or boys. We may suddenly have a couple dozen if they’re mixed up.
Me
Did your husband get them from a reputable breeder?
Cassie
No. He happened upon someone selling them from the back of their car in a parking lot.
Audrey
Well, I guess we can welcome you to chaos. It’s definitely louder, but they’ll all make you laugh at least once a day.
Me
Get the little hamster ball things. My girls love to roam around my apartment in them. Plus, it wears them out, and they tend to sleep more afterward.
Audrey
YOUR apartment? Not Max’s apartment? That’s the first time I’ve heard you refer to it that way.
Me
I didn’t even realize I’d done that. I guess it feels a little bit more like my apartment every day.
Becca
That’s how it was when I moved into Jacob’s apartment. Slowly, it felt like mine too.
Audrey
Jamie sort of moved me into his house by force. More and more people were finding my clinic, and it freaked him out. He had a team hired to move me, and it happened in one day. But it felt like home before then, like his house was a safe space for me from the first time I went there.
Cassie
Yeah, no. I totally didn’t view Gabe’s house as mine until we’d been dating — and living together — for months! I guess I figured the bottom would drop out at some point, and he’d realize I was more than he bargained for.
Becca
What made you think that?
Cassie
I don’t know. Probably some buried fear about relationships and being loved.
Maybe it’s due to having all of my brothers be professional athletes, and them scaring off any potential boyfriends growing up.
Or the fact that I know what athletes tend to go for in women, and figured I wasn’t in that wheelhouse.
Whatever the reason, Gabe was so patient about it.
Me
Sounds like Gabe is a good guy.
Cassie
He’s the best.
Cassie
UNTIL HE brINGS HOME RODENTS AND EXPECTS ME TO MOTHER THEM.
Cassie
I just tried to ask Siri how to tell if a baby guinea pig has a penis, and I have a feeling I’ve just been added to a handful of FBI lists.
Becca
How can you tell if they have penises?
Audrey
It’s somewhat hard to tell if they’re really young, and fur can cover up the female genitalia. But for males, there’s a distinct bulge where the penis is, and if pressure is applied, the penis will pop out.
Cassie
So the whole “grower versus shower” conversation applies to rodents as well.
Audrey
The testicles are on each side of the anus as well, not the penis.
Becca
I learn all kinds of new things courtesy of this chat.
Me
I’m really glad I have girl guinea pigs.
Becca
Me too.
I’ve been giving Max the play-by-play of the group chat, which he’s tremendously enjoyed.
We’ve been texting more than normal this week, and rarely about baseball.
If I tried to steer the conversation to work, he’d change it right back.
I lost track of the number of times I caught myself giggling and kicking my feet at something he said, and then I had a major epiphany.
Max is courting me.
He’s not being aggressive or impatient, and he’s well aware that I need time to figure things out. He’s using it to his advantage by getting to know me even better. Without me even realizing it, he’s become such an important person in my life.
Somehow, Max Callahan inched his way into my heart, making me fall in love with him. And I’m sad about it because I want to tell the whole world.
People need to know how sweet he is. The number of times I find him talking softly to Marilyn and Muriel, and how he sneaks extra raspberries for them because he thinks they’ll like him more.
Or how he aimed for Javier. People should know how many times he’s come to my defense, and when he rescued me from my apartment.
The Raptors need to know what a beautiful person he is, and how they’ll be missing out on an extraordinary man and teammate if they let him go after the season.
Which is how I’ve ended up in Human Resources on a Friday afternoon, meeting with a large percentage of the management team.
Baseball teams are made up of two sides of management: the executive side and the coaching side.
Obviously, the coaching side is still in New Orleans, due to arrive home late tonight.
So, I’m sitting at a long conference table, facing a firing squad of sorts, featuring the general manager, president of business operations, president of baseball operations, Human Resources manager, and the director of sports nutrition.
“We’ve heard rumblings, Ms. Holmes, of a potential relationship between you and our right fielder,” the president of baseball operations, Winston Evans, states. “You are aware of a no-fraternization rule, correct?”
“Yes, sir, I am,” I reply, inwardly cringing at how docile and meek my voice sounds. Clearing my throat, I continue. “It was unintentional, if that helps. But I understand this may impact my employment. Before you make any decisions, I’d like to talk to you about Max.”
“Alright, go ahead,” Winston says.
I take a deep breath, then dive in. “I know I broke a rule, but I’m more concerned with what will happen to Max.
I know his contract is up at the end of the season, and I truly think you’ll be doing a disservice to the team and this organization if you don’t extend him.
Granted, I know his start here was rocky.
It took him some time to find his stride, and even longer to get to know his teammates.
But he’s genuinely one of the most decent men I’ve ever met. ”
I look down at the table, unable to maintain eye contact as I continue. “When I worked for Atlanta, I was sexually assaulted.”
The Human Resources manager, Marcia, audibly gasps as she covers her mouth with her hand.
“Actually, wait. I’m not going to say it that way.
I was raped. I shouldn’t call it a sexual assault, because that sort of dials down the trauma, don’t you think?
I was raped by a player. The same guy I’d been to HR about more than once because he was harassing me.
They did nothing, of course. I wanted to quit.
I couldn’t stay there. Couldn’t be near him, knowing he’d possibly assault me again.
But I couldn’t afford to immediately leave, so I began looking for other positions.
I was lucky to find a job with Baltimore, but it took a few months.
The entire time, Javier harassed me. Not too soon after I left the organization, he was traded to a different team.
Maybe it was a coincidence, or maybe it wasn’t. I’ll probably never know.”
“Who did it?” Winston asks, his voice gruff. “This is not something we will allow in this Clubhouse. I want to make sure he isn’t offered a deal here.”
I’m about to say it doesn’t matter. That it’s in the past, and I’ve moved on.
But then I remember the entire team surrounding me in the hotel hallway, cheering as we celebrated Javier’s injuries, and I realize I don’t have to hide it anymore.
I don’t have to shoulder this burden by myself any longer.
“Javier Morales. He’s with Houston now.”