Chapter 2
2
Haley
Well. I guess that happened, huh?
Pulling into the parking lot of our apartment building, Roman happily bubbles from the back seat, a toothy smile on his face. Normally, I put music on for our drives, but today I drove us home in silence. My brain has been working overtime to try and stop all these thoughts currently spiraling through my head.
Cooper. March.
He’s the most beautiful man I have ever seen in my life, and he came out of nowhere and saved the day. Roman has been absolutely miserable the last week or so, and to see him finally get some relief. For a moment, I was torn between gratitude and then feeling like the world’s shittiest mother that I never thought of something like that.
But I quickly chalked those thoughts up to exhaustion and lack of caffeine, which I made sure to also pick up after we left the store. Shutting down the engine, I climb out and swiftly get Roman unstrapped from his car seat. We have a ground floor apartment, and my assigned parking spot is directly in front of our front door.
Setting him on his feet, I grab his little fist and walk him around to the trunk, popping it open before grabbing as many bags in one hand that I can manage. He giggles when he slaps at one of the bags, and it narrowly misses his own head.
“Careful there, Rocky. You’ll get hurt, bub.”
“Mama…Mama…” Roman giggles again, and the sound causes my heart to flutter, just like it does every time he does that. I will never get enough from my little love. Leaving the bags at my front door, we make two more trips until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. With a push of the button, my car is locked, and I’m letting Roman inside.
He teeters over to his toy box in the corner, and I busy myself with getting everything inside. Our place is a typical one-bedroom apartment, with a dining area that I converted into my bedroom with some cheap folding room dividers. I keep all of my clothes and personal items in Roman’s room, since the only good thing is the large walk-in closet he has. Plus, at sixteen months old, he doesn’t exactly need every inch of the space for his own.
With a shared living room and kitchen area, it’s not much, but it’s home. For the last three months, it’s given us more freedom than I ever expected. My older brother, Jensen, helps cover my rent every month, and while he’s not thrilled with me not having my own bedroom, I also didn’t want him spending all his hard-earned money when he isn’t even in the country.
Jensen is an active-duty Navy pilot, and is on month four of his six-month deployment. He’s five years older than me, but has been my best friend and protector my entire life. JJ joined the Navy one month after he turned eighteen, and has spent the last year working his ass off. He has made something of himself, despite the family we come from.
We grew up in an incredibly rich, small town in Connecticut, and our parents aren’t your typical ones. When they had Jensen, he was all they really wanted, a perfect son to follow in our father’s footsteps as the next top surgeon in the Northeast. Those plans were derailed when our mother decided to have an affair with a local mechanic, resulting in me only four years later.
I know what you’re thinking. Why would they stay together and have me? Easy.
Their reputation and public image were more important than their children.
My entire life, I have been treated as less than and unwanted. Our father made sure that my biological father left town without incident and has never been heard from again. Money talks, especially to someone who also didn’t want anything to do with me.
It only gave our father initiative to do whatever he wanted, and I’m pretty sure he’s currently buried inside one of his nurses or his assistant, while our mother is most likely too drunk to care.
They are the most selfish human beings I have ever had the displeasure of knowing. Jensen was the only one who loved me unconditionally, and he spent most of his life living at home, making sure I was properly fed and taken care of. Once he got his license, he started driving me to school. Every afternoon he drove out to the only fast-food place in our town, and we’d share a serving of French fries together while I told him about my day.
I remember the day in his senior year of high school when he told me that he planned to join the military. He’d turned eighteen that prior fall, and despite knowing he could have quit high school and enlisted, he wanted to graduate. It was two months before my fourteenth birthday, and to this day I can still remember crying in the front seat of his BMW, a sixteenth birthday present from our parents. All we ever heard was how he was going to Vanderbilt and getting into the top med school program in the country. It’s what Dad did, and Jensen was expected to do the same thing.
“It’s going to be okay, Hale. I promise, okay? We can write letters to each other, and as soon as I get phone privileges after basic training, I’ll call you every day.”
“No, it won’t,” I cried. “Mom and Dad aren’t going to let me talk to you when you leave. They’re going to be so mad, and you know how they like to punish you, JJ. They hurt me through you, and I don’t want them to take you from me.”
Jensen ran a hand through his dark brown hair, his blue eyes so much like mine filled with sadness and another emotion I couldn’t figure out at only thirteen. Setting his milkshake in the cupholder, he reached across the console to pull me into his arms and pressed a kiss to the top of my head.
“I dare them to do anything to you. I fucking dare them.”
“Please don’t leave me,” I sobbed, tears finally falling down my cheeks. Jensen pulled away from me to grip my face in gentle hands before kissing my forehead.
“I’ll never leave you, little sister. You’re my best friend, and I love you more than anything in this world. I will never leave you. But if I’m going to get you out of that house and into a better place, I need to do this. Once you turn eighteen you can move to wherever I’m stationed and live with me.”
“Pinky promise?” I asked tearfully, and Jensen gave me his best smile, before hooking his little finger with mine, before dropping a kiss to our fingers.
“Pinky promise, Hale. I love you most.”
“Love you best, JJ.”
I’m broken from my memories when Roman lets out a loud squeal, and I turn from the kitchen counter to where he’s throwing his stuffed monkey at the couch.
“What are you doing to your poor MonkMonk?” I laugh. He just lifts the stuffed animal up in show before tossing him back at the couch.
“Ma-mun!” he screeches, before throwing him behind his back.
“Little man, come help Mommy for a second,” I call, holding up a bag of Goldfish, his favorite snack at the moment. He comes rushing at me, blond ringlets falling over his forehead, his sweet cherub face so excited over the simplest thing.
I get him situated in his high chair before dumping some of his snack on the tray. I know he’s probably too old for it, but since we don’t have a kitchen table, and I need to get the house picked up some, it’s the easiest thing to do. I’m just reaching for the bag of frozen mixed veggies when my cell phone starts ringing from where I left it in my purse. Tossing the bag in the freezer, I grab it out to find Jensen calling me.
“Hey JJ,” I greet, setting the call on speakerphone so I can keep at putting it all away.
“Hale, my favorite sister. How are you, sweetheart?”
“I’m your only sister,” I remind him, resting my hip against the counter.
“I don’t make the rules. You’re my favorite, so deal with it.”
“Did you call to just drive me insane or is there something you wanted?” I tease. The sound of my brother laughing comes through the line, and then it cuts out before coming back in.
“Just wanted to say hi. We’re getting the plane fueled for a delivery, and I don’t know how long we’ll be gone for, so I had to call you first.”
“Be safe, Jens.”
“Always. How’s my nephew doing?” he asks, and I quickly take a second to turn the call to FaceTime. Jensen accepts immediately, and I smile when his handsome face comes up on my screen. I wave before turning the camera to face Roman, who immediately lights up when he sees his uncle on the screen.
Roman has always been shy with strangers. As I watch him bat his fingers at my phone screen causing my brother to laugh, I can’t help my mind drifting to earlier, and how taken Roman seemed to be with Cooper.
“Alright, we’re getting ready to leave, but I’ll check in once I’m back to the base.”
“Okay. I love you best, JJ.”
“Love you most, sis. Love you, Romey.”
With a wave, my phone goes dark and I have to force back the tears that spring to my eyes. While I know he’s not necessarily in the direct line of fire, I always worry about him so much. But he loves his job, and because he has done everything for me, I support him implicitly. I just never let on how much his job scares me.
Roman goes back to happily munching on his snack, so I set my phone down and finish getting the groceries put away. Once that task is finished, I get the living room picked up before I pull Roman down from his high chair. He runs over to the couch, trying to climb up onto it. I help him out, and quickly check on his diaper when I get him up.
Seeing he’s clean, I let out a deep breath and settle down on the couch next to him, resting my head back as he climbs on my lap, hugging my neck.
My sweet boy. He is without a doubt the best thing I have ever been blessed with, but sometimes I can’t help the loneliness that swirls in my heart. My brother is deployed, and even when he’s not, he is still going to be stationed out of New York, so I know I won’t be able to see him more than a few times a year now that I’m in Tennessee. I’m starting my new job at the daycare our cousin works at, so maybe that is the key to what I’ve been missing in my life.
Not a hunky firefighter that stepped in to help my baby.
Definitely not that.
“So, this is the infant room, where you’ll primarily be working. You’ll be one of four ladies in here, and then Roman will be in the toddler room with myself. Then we have the preschool level classroom, which we’ve talked about you doing eventually.” Beth, our only cousin, is showing me around the daycare, a clipboard in her hand and a huge smile pasted on her face.
“It’s perfect. I seriously can’t thank you enough for letting me come on board.”
“Seriously, no worries at all. Jensen wasn’t too happy, though, when I called to let him know I was offering you a job.”
Laughing, I brush a few stray auburn curls off my face. “Jens will only be happy if I let him take care of me and I don’t work. But I need the money to pay for classes.”
“He knows how much you want to get your degree, girl. Your brother is just trying to give you what you should have had growing up.”
“True,” I agree, following her into her office. “But I have my associates already. And I can’t keep taking his money for shit. I just can’t. He pays for my apartment; he pays for my car. It’s not fair, Beth, because he deserves to have his own life.”
“You and I both know that helping you and his nephew is not nearly the hardship you think it is. And we both know that he has no plans to settle down and have his own family until he’s out of the military. He talks about it enough anyway.”
We settle down on the couch in her office, and I kick my feet up on the coffee table.
“Trust me, I know. Which sucks because I’d love my own niece or nephew to love on. But sometimes I worry that he’s putting his entire life on hold for me. Every decision he has made was with me in mind. I’m not a teenager anymore. I’m twenty-three.”
“So, tell him that. Explain how important it is that you start doing things on your own.”
“I’m going to, when he finishes this deployment and comes to visit, like always.”
“How is everything else going?” Beth asks, standing from the couch to make herself some coffee. She offers me a cup, but I shake my head, already having had enough caffeine for the day.
“Good. I’m going to go broke buying waffles for Rome to chew on, but otherwise good.”
“Waffles?” she asks, raising her eyebrows at me.
“Yeah. We were at the grocery store the other day, and he was having a meltdown. Some firefighter came over to see if he could help, and he showed me the frozen waffle trick. Roman has been so much happier since.”
“Firefighter, huh? Well, now you know you gotta give me the deets,” she says. Beth flips her long blonde hair over her shoulder as she settles back down next to me.
“Don’t you start,” I grumble, and she just starts laughing.
“Oh, hell no. Spill, girl. Was he hot? Old? Smelly?”
Now I’m the one laughing. “He was not old or smelly. And he was okay looking, not that I noticed.”
Please, Jacobs. Cooper was not okay looking.
He was downright sinful .