Chapter 10 Collette
The darkness made the silence more deafening.
I sat there for what felt like hours. Who knew it could’ve been?
Everything that he had said to me replayed in my head. Everything I knew first hand about Mr. Holdt, I played out.
The video was the first interaction where I’d had a chance to watch his face.
Andy had been intent on his point. Using his hands to explain whatever he felt needed the extra emphasis.
Mr. Holdt had received his words and held a conversation with him. He hadn’t seemed angry. Either he had a perfect poker face or he was okay with everything that Andy had told him.
They didn’t appear to have any bad blood between them. Andy had seemed normal, not scared.
His expressions weren’t the same as the ones he used when he was working a con. Instead he was relaxed, almost happy. Now that I thought back on it, he didn’t appear to fear for his life or that he was caught.
We always did cons growing up. There had never been enough to go around, so we’d been on the lookout for people that simply left things lying around.
It wasn’t stealing if they were too dumb to protect their stuff. Or so we’d always told ourselves. It was what helped me sleep at night.
He had continued the same things we’d done as teenagers. He had upped his marks and the con though. Which would ultimately have serious consequences.
What if he’d managed to con Mr. Holdt? He could have tried to pull a fast one and Mr. Holdt had disposed of him.
Mr. Holdt had appeared cool and calm.
They’d shaken hands.
Wait! Had it been a handshake or one of those handshake hugs guys did? Like a bro hug with secret steps? That would make all the difference. Wouldn’t it?
Was it more of an amicable parting than I’d assumed? Could they have been working together? Was I all wrong about this? Mr. Holdt had to be the killer. Didn’t he?
Anger and emotions had fueled me into that elevator. I was letting that cloud what I should have seen. There were signs that he thought he was the more important person. But that would’ve been a given for a man of Mr. Holdt’s stature.
Already upset, I’d been pissed when he’d smirked at me. Not laughed or chuckled, but smirked. As if he knew more about everything than I did.
He’d had everything given to him. Money always spoke to people like Mr. Holdt. They assumed that they could pay people off and no one would care. As long as money exchanged hands then it was all right. The police looked the other way when a donation was made. It covered all problems—except for people like me.
That had grated on my nerves. It wasn’t like I was some newbie coming up. I’d been through many of life’s rougher or more intense situations than most people dealt with in their entire lifetimes.
Things were still tough, but I’d dropped everything to make sure that my brother got justice while this douchebag walked around free. He had to be held responsible for his actions. Even if he wasn’t the killer, he knew who had done it.
Honestly, I was certain that Ian Holdt had never had a hard day in his life. The research I’d done on him had shown he might have built his company from the ground up, but he’d done it with his family’s money. So where was the struggle? The blood, sweat, and tears that it took to build something out of nothing. Mr. Holdt never had nothing.
What motivated him to use others as a stepping stone to climb the ladder to success?
I had no use for people that pushed the poor down further to help them get to the top. It wasn’t the way things should be done.
Yeah, sure, Andy and I had done things that I wasn’t proud of, but they hadn’t hurt anyone. The cons we pulled were born out of necessity.
Murder hurt people forever. It wasn’t a victimless crime.
Maybe I’d gone about this the wrong way. Instead, I should have been looking at his motivations and not about what he was covering up. Most people didn’t have their evil actions out where others could see them. They wanted them as far from a chance of discovery as possible.
An actual golden child. He’d used his wealthy connections to establish a base to build his company.
A tech company that produced things so expensive there wasn’t room for the little person to have an opportunity to buy them.
Sure, the things his company made were making the world a better place, but so were the drugs that the pharmaceutical companies produced. They just priced them so out of reach for the people that needed them the most.
I didn’t know how to take my interactions with him. Added on the things I knew and I wasn’t any closer to knowing anything. Just more confusion.
He had never uttered a word in the elevator. Not a sound.
In that short space of time, he’d managed to make me feel sexy, annoyed, and ready to forget about the fact that he’d killed Andy.
Charisma oozed out of him. It was something I hadn’t thought about or added into the mix when profiling him. It would make it slightly harder to pin down things he was doing illegally.
People tended to forget things they’d seen when someone was talking to them in such a charming manner.
There wasn’t a shy bone in his body. He was confident and in charge of those around him. When he asked a question or made a request, people jumped to obey.
It wasn’t a demand, but more of a quiet firm tone that made a person not ask questions.
The first time I’d heard him speak was when he’d taken me into his office.
Each question he’d asked had been with a purpose.
He wasted no emotional extras on making me feel comfortable. Almost sterile in nature, like a doctor with a bad bedside manner. He could turn on the charm or turn it off again but seemed to be more comfortable with specifics and not trying to make small talk.
I thought back to what had been said.
Food. Medical. Personal. He’d had a reason for each category so all of his bases were covered.
They’d made me think all the information they’d gathered had been from a deep dark dive into our backgrounds. He watched people and then used what he observed to make them do what he asked.
Nothing he did was without a purpose. Each thing he said was specific to elicit a response from me.
I’d given him a road map on how to manipulate me. Andy would have been just as vulnerable to that kind of charm. He wouldn’t have had his guard up with the CEO of a reputable company. Most of the things I’d heard about the company had been glowing reviews. The things about Ian Holdt, on the other hand, were wild and varied.
Andy wouldn’t have been able to con him for long. There would have been so many discrepancies that Mr. Holdt would have known it was the wrong kind of deal and had Rossi take care of the problem.
Any red flags that had come up, Andy would have ignored them because the money was too good to make waves. He was always after another chance to get a leg up. Another day, another mark and then he would have been off to greener pastures.
I loved my brother, but he was always going to try to find a way to not be labeled as a foster kid.
Mr. Holdt would have been that kind of opportunity that drew him into the spider’s web before swallowing him whole.
That was what he’d done, drawn me in before turning the tables on me. Now, I was under his control with no way out.
He knew everything he needed to know about me. All of the things he’d asked about me were to make sure that I would be willing to go along with his sinister intentions.
This job was being used as a cover for something other than a assistant’s position. I just hadn’t picked up on it then.
Instead, I’d raced headlong into a situation and ignored all the red flags because I’d been certain that I could do what the FBI hadn’t been able to do. Clearly, I wasn’t built for intrigue and espionage.
Everything about this screamed ulterior motive, but what would motivate someone that had everything?
The darkness was his way to exert his control over me.
He’d even planned the bumpers on the couch and other furniture. They’d been put on all the sharp edges so that when it was dark, I wouldn’t run into things and hurt myself.
Devious and yet so intelligent. Why was I even more attracted to him because he’d cared enough to make sure I wasn’t hurt?
A laugh started coming out of my mouth. Once it began, it couldn’t be stopped. Hysterical, emotional, and unable to be controlled, the days of ups and downs were taking a toll on me.
The humorous aspects of the situation couldn’t be ignored.
Then my laugh turned to tears, and I began to sob. I finally shattered.
All the emotions I’d held back came pouring out. It was as if a dam had broken inside me and I had to get it all out. Every last tear I’d kept from erupting managed to spew.
The month of going through Andy’s effects, trying to find his murderer, and now the time spent in a dark basement had pushed me over the edge.
I was crazy. There could be no other answer for my actions.
His kindness, even in the midst of whatever he was planning for me, had taken me by surprise. Andy was the only person that had ever tried to do nice things for me.
Just when this man was trying to get inside my head, it drew me toward him more. He’d taken the one person that I cared about and appeared to be replacing him without even realizing it. Was this the beginning of Stockholm? I’d been so starved for any sort of affection that when I lose the one person to ever give me any tenderness, I replace it with no problem.
Well, he’d done it. My head was an open roadmap for him, it just wasn’t going to be in the way he’d first thought.
I had never let myself cry as a foster kid. Sure when I was under five, a few tears leaked out when one of the kids would tease me. After a few times, I learned that it didn’t do any good to show weakness. They just used it against me.
Night time was when I’d let all those feelings out. By the time I’d hit my teens, I had even quit crying when no one could see. There was no point in wasting tears on things that couldn’t be changed. All tears ever did was exhaust me, and I had to be on high alert at all times.
Andy’s death was one exception to the rule I’d made. Even then, I had only cried for a few moments. I’d dried my eyes and focused on finding his killer.
Action was the only thing that could help when all the other options were unavailable.
Mr. Holdt might be super smart and think that he would be the winner of this game we were playing. I knew what his game was. He wanted to break me.
How had he known the one thing that would get under my skin was darkness?
Andy was the only person that knew about my fear of the dark which seemed to be a coincidence and not a planned problem.
Granted, most adults were afraid of the dark. It was a good guess on his part that I would succumb to that fear.
Well, I wasn’t going to let him win. That was all part of his plan.
I stood. Hands out in front of me, I felt my way to the kitchen.
The steps I’d memorized and counted helped to make sure that I didn’t trip or stub a toe.
The refrigerator door was yanked open, but the light I was expecting to come on never did.
Nothing.
Absolutely nothing happened.
The microwave was on the counter, and it should have had a light inside.
My hands felt for the door handle and pulled.
Darkness once again.
The lights on the microwave clock were even off.
His voice sounded through the room in a creepy way.
“Did you really think I’d forget something as trivial as the appliance lights? What would be the fun in that?”
The rhetorical question hung in the air.
I growled at the invisible man who was annoying me to no end. Then I turned toward and flipped off the room.
His laugh filled the space.
“Remember, you chose this.”
The echoing silence seemed to repeat the words over and over again until they faded into the darkness.
I was beginning to hate those words.