10. Danny
Danny
My dressing room was in a state of chaos.
On one side of the room, Paige and Faye argued about the party Faye wanted to attend.
On the other side, Britta sniped at Stella about me being on stage at Brayonna’s show last night.
Meanwhile outside, the tapings from As The Minutes Tick By ran late, so the crew had to scramble to get a green screen set up for Alfie and his team to film the fan trailer.
I took a deep breath and tried to block everything out.
I focused on the immediate task in front of me: the dark circles under my eyes from several late nights in a row.
I dug through the stage makeup bin in search of some concealer as I ran lines from the monologue I’d chosen.
Faye said it would be perfect for the trailer, but as I muttered the words under my breath, they didn’t ring true.
“Are you talking to yourself, Woobie?” Stella called out.
“Just running my lines,” I replied.
“You’re not being you.” Stella leaned in to examine my face.
I forced a grin. “Maybe I’m in character.”
“Mmm. Sure thing, Woobie. I’m going to grab a smoke.” She gave me a pat on the shoulder then waddled out of the room.
Britta scowled at her as she went out the door. “I don’t know why you still let her represent you,” Britta complained. “We could have avoided so much trouble if you had an agent who understood how to use a cellphone.”
I didn’t have to turn my head to know that Paige and Faye were glaring at Britta.
Stella had been with me since the beginning of my career, and I had no complaints.
My sister and niece considered her family and would always defend her vigorously.
Britta, on the other hand, they both despised.
There were days I wondered why I put up with Britta, but her ability made up for her attitude.
Also for an actor at my level, beggars couldn’t be choosers.
“We’re not having that conversation, Britta,” I said, levelling a glare at her.
“Fine,” she said with a huff. “Whatever. Anyway, that silly game you played last night seemed to generate some good buzz. Not enough. Most of the people online are still hating on you because of the books.”
“Thanks for the appraisal, Britta. Did you spend a whole five minutes on MeeTeeVee to learn that?” Paige snarked.
Britta narrowed her eyes at Paige. With all the drama in the last week, the sparks had been flying between the two of them.
“The one thing I did pick up, and the studio noticed too, was the energy between you and that Richards woman,” Britta noted. “You two seem to be getting along better. Some people online are saying you’d make a great couple. Is there anything I should know?”
I cringed. I didn’t need this at all.
“Britta, could I have a moment to myself? I need to focus before I get out there,” I said, trying to keep my cool and avoid saying something that I would regret later.
She let out a huff of disgust and rolled her eyes. “Sure. Break a leg,” she muttered and clenched her jaw as she left the room.
“I’m so glad you have the Edna Mode of publicists,” Paige complained. “You want us gone, too?”
“Yeah. I need a minute to clear my head.”
Paige gave me an affectionate punch on the shoulder as she walked out. Faye paused to give me a side hug and a quick kiss on the cheek.
“I must be bad off to get the pity hug and kiss,” I said, giving Faye a smirk.
“You look tense,” Faye said, tilting her head as if evaluating me. “Did it help?”
“Immensely,” I lied, forcing a grin.
She gave me a small smirk, patting me on the shoulder. “Break a leg, Uncle Danny.”
I glanced up at my dressing-room mirror and watched her leave.
As the door closed, my eyes focused on a picture of Faye from a few years ago at the infamous Kismet Sizzle concert hanging from the frame.
My eyes drifted to other pictures. The birthday party where she insisted on getting books for all her gifts.
The picture of her as a baby, in my father’s arms.
Toronto.
My thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door. Alfie and his horrible mustache appeared in the doorway. “Hey, kid. We’re good to go on set. Are you ready to blow the roof off this place?”
I forced a smile and followed him. On set, I spotted my “team” off to the side.
They all gave me a wave of varying degrees of support.
Next to them was Brayonna and Bennet who smiled and shouted out good luck.
I walked past all the crew that Paige had strong-armed to stay after hours, each of them either giving me a nod or saying small words of encouragement.
It wasn’t helping my anxiety. I looked around for Jessica. She was nowhere to be seen. Was she late or–?
“All right, Danny,” Alfie said, pointing to the blue gaffer tape on the floor. “Those are the marks we went through during rehearsal. We got the lighting set, the music picked out, and the backdrop we’re going to put on the green screen. All we need is you and your amazing talent.”
Paige must have said something to him. He was buttering me up. Trying to put me at ease.
It wasn’t working.
He walked off the set and positioned himself behind the camera. “All right,” he called out. “Quiet on the set! Let’s knock this out! Bring it home, Danny! Action!”
I assumed the stance, taking a deep breath. “Friends and allies, gather close and—”
It wasn’t there. I wasn’t in the moment, and I could tell by Alfie’s face he knew it too. I dropped my head, trying to take even breaths, trying to center myself.
“It’s fine, Danny. Keep rolling. Get back to your mark and we’ll start again.”
I went back to my mark and settled in. Deep breaths.
“Friends and Allies!” I shouted, but it was flat and hollow.
I pressed on. “Gather close to me and hear my words. There comes a time in our lives when we must rise above our petty squabbles and fears to face a threat that will consume us all. The forces of the Stygian Abyss seek to claim the soul of my beloved Fiona. They seek to break the pact of Glen Orrin and shroud our world in eternal night. They are gravely mistaken if they think we will let them have our realm without a battle.”
I caught sight of Mike, the boom operator, as he winced. I pushed it aside, trying to focus. “I know that all of you feel betrayed by Fiona–”
Did I say Fee-ona? Or Fi-o-Nah? I swallowed and kept talking.
“–That the pact she made will doom her to damnation. But that pact saved each and every one of you, including those you love and seek to protect. Her sacrifice was noble despite the measures taken. Who among us would have denied that opportunity? You can all turn your noses and claim a higher noble cause, but you all know you would have taken that pact. And who are we to let her burn because of it?”
Mike checked his watch, and I could see he was tapping his foot, impatiently. Leona, the sound technician, was looking at her phone.
I missed my mark and had to adjust for the camera angle, hoping it worked.
“So let us charge into the breach, our hearts true and our fists held high. The forces of shadows know that we will not be denied, that we will not falter. Let the beat of our hearts be our cadence. Let every breath we take push us forward until the Stygian Abyss is nothing but a stain on our boots and erased as a threat to our realm. Together. Together we will prevail. Together we will save Fiona. Together, we will bring forth a new age.”
The crew didn’t react, and I could see Alfie’s frown behind his mustache. There was a small bit of applause, most of it coming from my sister and Faye. Brayonna and Bennet were sharing a look with each other as they politely clapped.
“All right, that wasn’t too bad,” Alfie lied. “But I think we can do better. Let’s start it again, shall we?”
I nodded and went back to my opening mark. When I looked up, I saw all the disappointed looks of the crew. Great. So, I wasn’t just sucking at this, I was disappointing everyone.
“Action!”
“Friends and al-”
I tripped over my own feet and fell flat on my face.
I pulled myself up from the floor to see Alfie heave a giant sigh. “Oh, brother.”
I was in trouble.
We did a retake. At least this time I didn’t fall, but it was horrible. Then we did it again. And again.
I was spiraling. Nothing was coming out right. At one point I just stopped and turned my back to the camera and crew.
“All right. Let’s take five minutes,” Alfie called out. Next thing I knew, he was by my side. He was using his calming tones that he always used on the cast whenever they were having problems. It made my head pound even more.
“Danny. Come on. This isn’t you.”
I paced in a circle, the wig causing my head to itch. I resisted the urge to pull it off.
“Take a deep breath, man. You know the words. I saw you on that stage in that interview you did with what's-her-face.”
“Jessica.”
“Right. You know this guy. You are this guy.” He stepped in front of me, forcing me to a stop. “You got this, kid.”
I went back to my mark to try again. Numbness settled inside me. I lost my connection. In the back of the room, I saw Paige trying to wrestle one of the key grips back to the set.
“Action!”
“Friends and allies, gather close to me and hear-” I stepped forward, but I was off. I used the wrong foot. It was enough to throw me off my game again. I turned around in a circle to get back in position.
“It’s okay Danny. Keep rolling! Action!”
“Friends and-”
It still wasn’t there. I stopped and dropped my chin onto my chest.
“Cut.”
Stella appeared next to me, taking my hand. “Come on Woobie, let’s talk it out.”
I groaned. “Sorry, Stella.”
“You don’t have to apologize to me,” she said, now holding my hand in both of hers. “I know you can do this. You’ve always been my favorite client. I would have pulled you from this show a dozen times if you hadn’t wanted to stay with Paige and Faye. You deserve this.”
I let out a long slow breath. “I don’t know, Stella. Paige and Faye are leaving for Toronto at the end of the season. Did you know that?”
She nodded, patting my hand. “I know, Woobie.”
“And then there’s this girl. Jessica. I know I’m falling in love with her but with everything going on I–”
“Shhh,” Stella said, pulling me down as she whispered to me. “I have just the thing to tell you.”
I leaned over to the woman who had tended to my career for years, waiting for her words of wisdom.
And she smacked me in the face with all her might.
“SNAP OUT OF IT!”
I blinked, trying to focus. For a woman in her seventies, she could cause some serious pain. My tongue probed my tooth just to make sure she hadn’t knocked it loose. As she waddled away. I tried to focus, but I still didn’t feel right.
As my field of vision cleared, there she was. Jessica.
She stood next to Faye, chatting. I don’t know what happened to her, but she looked like a train wreck.
She was in her Fiona cosplay, but half of it had fallen apart.
Her skirt was ripped, the trim on her jacket had peeled off, and her wig was askew.
Our eyes met, and I could see the worry in her eyes.
And then she smiled.
Just like that, the weight in me dissipated, and one thought above all clarified in my head:
Oh, the things I would do for that crooked grin.