33. Back To The Beginning
THIRTY-THREE
BACK TO THE BEGINNING
Vivian
“I know you’re under a lot of stress, but you need to take it easy,” Nurse Lena says, throwing her gloves in the waste bin after checking my vitals for the final time today. “The baby looks close to being full term. Labor can start any time now, and with the other injuries you’ve sustained… I recommend…” She looks at the ugly bruises still in the process of healing around my eyes. Her frown deepens.
“Recommend what?” I finish for her.
“Bed rest.”
I nod indifferently, but it seems to be enough for her. When she’s done cleaning up, Lena leads me out of the medical room and locks it behind her.
She walks me to my room and checks that my wrist has the bracelet on it, another frown forming on her face when I can’t manage to meet her eyes. “I know it’s not much, and I can’t be entirely certain, but I think the baby is a boy,” she tells me.
I blink and look at her.
She’s clearly waiting for me to react or say something. I don’t.
Lena gives me a sad smile. “Shout if you need me. If you need anything, Vivian. I mean it.” She’s gotten clingy since the altercation. Although we haven’t spoken about what happened, she knows the beating was from Father. He’s the only other person here. Despite her increased care and attention, I refuse to trust her or befriend her. For all I know, anything I say will end up back to him.
I want her to think Father broke me, that his beating killed me inside. Her sympathy has made her lax because she doesn’t expect that I’ll try anything that would elicit his attention. Her sympathy has given me a little more freedom, and it’s that freedom I’m depending upon when I try to escape tonight.
I mutter goodnight and close the door in her face. Listening to her walk away, I confirm she doesn’t lock my door.
My shoulders sag with relief and a small smile lifts my lips at the same time. Rubbing my stomach, I knew it was a boy. I had a feeling, one I can’t describe, an innate hunch. Syasku gave me a little boy. I’m already hoping he takes after him.
My smile fades, knowing I can’t wait any longer.
After I hit my father, he found me standing over the tub destroying my life’s work. I don’t remember much after that, just something about destroying the abomination inside me. I woke the next day in the medical room with a splitting headache, stitches on my brow, and my hands cuffed.
For weeks afterward I was cuffed and constrained to my room, isolation returning like an old friend to embrace me in silence. I bided my time. I was in more pain than before, but I didn’t mind. What’s a little more pain when my body already radiated with it?
I just had to wait until Lena trusted or pitied me enough to remove my handcuffs. To stop locking my room at night.
Heading to the bathroom, I pull out the plastic shard I broke off my tablet from where it’s hidden behind the toilet. With the shard in my grip, I pace, waiting for the night shift to deepen. Leaving my room several hours later, I look around and tiptoe out, foregoing my shoes.
Everything is dark. Not a single light has been left on.
Shaking, I make my way to the front door, hoping the shard is good enough to break the lock.
“What are you doing?”
I jump, spinning around to face Nurse Lena. She turns on a light and looks me over, the confused wrinkles on her brow flatten out. She sighs.
“It’s not what it looks like,” I glower, slipping the shard into my sleeve.
She walks over to me. “I just knew you were going to try this.” She shakes her head like I disappointed her. “Even if you got through the door, you won’t make it past the elevator. You need a code. And why would you try, Vivian?” Her face falls. “You’ll only get yourself hurt again.”
My back stiffens. “I have to try.”
The worry returns to her face. “You’re scared, I get it, but this is the best place for you to be. You’re safe with me and?—”
“And my baby? Is my baby going to be safe? He said he’s going to kill it.”
She flinches, horror momentarily clouding her eyes. “The Sovereign will be here soon and will know what to do. We just have to be patient and wait for their arrival.”
I take a step toward her. “You don’t really believe that, do you?”
“Your father?—”
“My father is a pathetic liar who only cares about himself.”
“The Sovereign will never let anything happen to the baby, especially one as unique as yours.”
“You assume my father is going to tell them about it.”
“He has to,” she tries to assure me. “It’s against the law to lie to the Sovereign’s adjudicators. It’s punishable by death.”
“Only a handful of people know that I’m pregnant. Unless someone tells them, they will never know.” I watch her, implying she could tell them. “They won’t have access to his home,” I whisper. “They won’t even know I…”
I pause as an idea forms.
A very risky idea, but one that just might work. If I’m fast—if I’m lucky.
“Vivian?” Nurse Lena looks at me when I go silent.
Slowly, putting my hand to my brow, I wince. “I think… I’m getting sick.” I heave, and as I do, a strange cramping tightens my lower stomach. Frowning for real, I try to ignore it and chalk it up to convenient timing.
Her demeanor changes. “I’ll take you back to medical.”
Swaying on my feet, I topple to the ground.
“Vivian!” Nurse Lena drops to her knees and throws her arm around me. “Are you okay?”
I close my eyes and turn away. “I feel faint.”
“Shit,” Lena starts to curse. “We need to get you up!” She grabs my arm and tries to haul me off the ground. Pretending I’m too weak, I moan about back and stomach pain. She releases me. “Don’t move! I’ll be right back.” She rushes for the medical room.
I stagger to my feet and run to Nurse Lena’s room, which is several rooms down from mine.
Thankfully the door is cracked open, and when I reach it I push my way in. Quickly looking around, I spot her tablet on a desk and grab it. Beside it is her keycard. Shoving the card into my pocket, I log into the tablet’s guest mode and access The Dreadnaut’s interpersonal digital mailing system.
With trembling fingers, I type out a short message. My finger hovers over the send button. Closing my eyes, I say a little prayer and press the button.
Sneaking the tablet under my shirt, I head back to my room and shut myself in the bathroom.
And wait.
I’m taking a huge risk.
This could backfire magnificently.
But it’s far less risky than taking on the elevator door with a plastic shard.
Several minutes later, I hear Nurse Lena call outside my room. “Vivian?”
“I’m in the bathroom,” I respond just as I hear the ping of an incoming message on the tablet. “I need a moment!”
Hands shaking, I open the message and scan it over, my body frozen with nerves.
There, in bold type, is the six-digit security code for the elevator. A giddy laugh bursts from my mouth. It worked. With trembles coursing through me again, I hide the tablet behind the toilet and open the door. A look of relief floods Nurse Lena’s face. Behind her and in the hallway is a gurney.
“Are you okay?” she asks, scanning my face.
“Just a bit of nausea. I need your help with the sink.” I wipe my hand across the back of my mouth, pretending I puked. “I didn’t make it to the toilet,” I lie.
She passes me and enters the bathroom, and once her back is turned, I shut the door, closing her inside. She calls after me as I rush to the gurney and roll it so it’s facing the bathroom door. When she opens it, I thrust it into her with all of my strength.
She goes flying back and into the tub. She doesn’t get back up.
“Lena?” I call softly, not intending to hurt her, only stopping her long enough to leave. “Lena?” I say her name again when she doesn’t answer. Glancing at the empty hallway, my stomach squeezes again, and I grit my teeth, holding in a groan.
The squeezing fades.
Entering the bathroom, I push the gurney aside and check Lena’s pulse. When it flutters under my finger, a relieved sigh escapes my mouth. “I’m sorry,” I whisper. She’s always been good to me. She tried.
At least this way she can say I attacked her. She won’t be implicated.
Leaving her side, I pull out her keycard and rush to the front door. It opens immediately, and I stumble into the open foyer entryway where three separate elevators await me.
Knowing the central one will take me down to the atrium, I head to the one on the right and type in the code.
Several grueling minutes later, the elevator arrives and the doors slide open. I dash inside, slam my hand against the panel, and hit the security lock, not caring where it takes me, as long as it takes me away.
When it moves, I drop into the corner and curl over my cramping stomach, trying not to cry. Pressing my back against the wall, I hug my knees, wishing Syasku were here and I weren’t alone. With my blood rushing, I try calming down with several deep breaths.
Pulling out the shard from my sleeve, I cut off the bracelet and then wrench it between my hands until it’s crushed.
As some of my panic settles, I peek up at the elevator buttons and deliberate. I’ve never been to more than half of the sectors on The Dreadnaut and all three ports are still in lockdown. Not that it matters, I can’t pilot a ship, and I don’t have money to pay for a seat on one. I have nothing on me I can barter with. My skills in medical technology and machinery are useless. I can’t go to the Dregs because as soon as someone recognizes me, I’ll most likely be tortured for information and then ransomed or killed.
There’s no one I trust.
But there’s one person who might help me… who will at least tell me whether or not Syasku is alive. They’re the same person who sent me the elevator code.
I stand and return to the panel, changing the destination. Afterward I pace and wait.
When the door slides open a few minutes later, my eyes widen upon Ursula who is already waiting for me on the other side. With her arms crossed in a haughty manner, she startles upon seeing my stomach before slowly meeting my eyes.
Staring at each other, I leave the elevator and walk toward her, hearing the doors slide closed behind me.
“I was actually headed to your father’s quarters. I was surprised to receive your message, even more so now that you managed to escape,” she says, her cold voice washing over me. “He’ll look for you here.”
“Are you going to turn me in?” I ask.
“That depends.”
“Is Syasku alive?” I blurt out.
“He might be.”
I begin to frown but hesitate, stiffening instead, hiding my pain when my stomach starts cramping again. “You don’t know?” I bite out.
She circles me. “No, my dear. He escaped, just like you have now.”
Shoulders sagging, I let out a sob, relieved.
“Don’t get your hopes up, Vivian. Just because he escaped into the ship doesn’t mean he’s alive. As for you.” She stops in front of me and wiggles her fingers. “You look like you’re ready to pop.”
I cross my arms over my stomach. She has no idea. “Will you help me? Will you help my baby?”
Her comm device rings, making me jerk in surprise. Sucking in a breath, I wait for her to pick up.
Seconds slow as my blood rushes with the urge to either continue fleeing or to fight. Ursula cocks her head, and I wonder if imploring her for help was a mistake. I’ve known her longer than anyone except my father, and even though she is loyal to him, I know she’s more interested in her research. She’ll want access to me, even if it goes against his orders.
And, I hope, she’s far less likely to outright murder my baby upon its arrival.
The comm device stops ringing.
“You’re asking me to take a huge risk,” she mutters, her eyes briefly distancing like she’s weighing those risks.
“I think he’s going to kill the baby, so if it ensures my baby lives, I will do whatever you want,” I whisper, unable to keep the hope from my voice. “I’ll take those risks.”
Her comm device starts ringing again.
“Please,” I beg.
She pulls out her comm device and shuts it off. I could faint from the stress from waiting for her decision.
She tucks the device back into her pocket. “Very well. But you won’t be able to stay here. Follow me and be quick about it.” She turns and starts down the hallway at a brisk pace, and I chase after her, trying not to look around, knowing this was the last place Syasku was before he vanished. We leave the medical sector through a back exit and enter the main housing sector that the majority of the medical community has been assigned to. My unit would be two floors up from this one.
A burst of pain strikes my stomach, and I stumble. Gritting my teeth, I keep walking.
“Faster,” she orders.
She leads me down an empty hallway until we get to a door on the other end. Opening it, she ushers me inside.
I stop dead in my tracks.
On the other side is a large red and black naga with the majority of his tail missing.
“Keep an eye on her,” Ursula says to him as I remain frozen where I stand. “I have some things to take care of. I’ll be back shortly.” She shuts the door just as I turn around. It clicks closed, and I try the handle.
It doesn’t open.
Pivoting, I face the naga and press my back to the door.
Alone together, and stuck once more, we stare at each other, neither of us willing to make the first move.