Chapter 41
THE SHOCK
ZEKE
Maggie’s crestfallen face was hard to ignore as I closed myself in what had become my bedroom. I knew she wanted to be there for me, but I couldn’t accept her comfort right now. There was a phone call I needed to make.
“It’s about time you came to your senses,” Leggett greeted me.
Anger rippled through me. This entire thing was his fault. “Did you know?” I snarled. “Did they tell you I’m on the autism spectrum?”
For once, Leggett remained uncharacteristically silent. But that was honestly an answer in and of itself.
“How could you keep that from me?” I hated how weak and faint my voice sounded. I hated even more that he still had this power over me. “You’re a goddamn bastard,” I ground out. Rather than hang up, I chucked my phone at the wall, where it shattered on impact.
It wasn’t enough of a release. I punched the wall behind the door. That crunch didn’t satisfy me either, so I did it again.
And again.
Then again.
Cool hands clutched my arm. Blood coated the skin all the way down to my elbow.
Maggie slowly pulled me back, guiding me towards the en suite bathroom.
Bright red splotches dripped down to the floor.
Somewhere in the back of my mind I cringed at how difficult cleaning up the blood spatter would be, but I couldn’t bring myself to care.
I had an out of body experience as Maggie helped me strip out of my clothes.
She turned the shower on, and though the icy water should have shocked me, I barely felt it when I stepped under the spray.
Leggett’s silence on that phone call echoed louder than any words ever would.
It all but confirmed what I suspected—my original diagnosis came during childhood.
“Patty is the woman who adopted me when I was three years old. Patty Leggett, and her husband, James.” There was no logical reason for me to tell Maggie any of this, yet I didn’t stop.
It all came out like a confession that I couldn’t control.
“After Patty died unexpectedly a few months later, Leggett raised me on his own. He’s an officer in the Army. He never wanted kids.”
Maggie tenderly scrubbed my arm with a washcloth. The blue fabric slowly dyed to purple as the blood saturated the cloth. “Is that how you got the scars on your back?” she asked quietly.
Nodding, I agreed. “He raised me to be a soldier, not a human being. If I didn’t follow orders, punishments were severe. Leggett’s controlled me since Patty died. He controls me now. That’s why we’re here.”
“What?!” In her shock, Maggie dropped the soaking wet washcloth, splattering bloody water everywhere.
“I took sick for the first time ever after I met you. He didn’t like that, so he gave me orders to Camp Humphreys, expecting me to apologize. ‘Nothing comes before the mission’ he always used to say. I was never allowed to be sick.”
“Allowed to be sick?” she repeated, her voice high. “Zeke, nobody has to give you permission to be sick!”
I snorted. “Not in the Leggett household.”
Water ran in rivulets down my abdomen as Maggie resumed washing the blood off, though her brow remained furrowed in thought.
I inhaled sharply as I realized this was the first time our skin made contact in months.
The soap couldn’t compete with the strong scent of vanilla wafting from Maggie’s hair.
She wore it down today in thick, heavy waves.
I wondered if Maggie realized how long it had been since we touched, if she missed it as much as I did. Did her heart skip a beat now? Did her breathing slow down in case she ruined the moment? Mine did.
Judging by the way her eyes sought mine, though, I suspected we might be in sync.
We both froze in wait. As cautiously as a deer hunter, I leaned towards her, the magnetic urge to touch her—be closer to her in any way possible—just as strong as the day we met.
She swallowed thickly before her gaze darted to my lips.
I wanted to kiss her, probably more than I wanted to wring Leggett’s neck for keeping such an important diagnosis from me.
Maggie would never judge me or look at me any differently, I knew that, but having her support right now made me feel marginally better.
Our roles reversed, her the caretaker and I the invalid, and I understood why Maggie tried so hard to be better for me.
Having your well being matter to someone after a lifetime of being invisible created another inseparable bond between us.
Without thinking of it, I leaned my head down, bracing myself against the wall as I zeroed in on her mouth. I wondered if it tasted as good as it had the first time.
Maggie took an involuntary step forward into the water of the walk in shower. The slick floor sent her flying and we both fell. I managed to catch her right before she landed on her knees.
The magic of the moment shattered. A flush crept across Maggie’s features as we both realized she came dangerously close to my dick. She extracted herself and scampered across the room to the door.
“I’ll get you some clean clothes,” whispered Maggie.
I didn’t have a chance to answer before she swept from the room.