Chapter 28 #2
"Because I never wanted you, Cadence. You were the biggest mistake of my life." The words hit me like a physical blow, stealing the air from my lungs. Around us, conversations faltered as people tuned in to our confrontation, sensing the drama unfolding.
"I had plans," she continued, her voice low and venomous.
"Ambitions. A future. And then there you were, this.
.. this anchor around my neck. If I was going to have the life I wanted, that meant giving you up.
And I didn't care one bit." Each word was a knife, twisting deeper.
I felt tears building, burning behind my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. Not here. Not in front of her.
"You're lying," I whispered, though part of me knew she wasn't. There was too much conviction in her voice, too much genuine disdain in her eyes.
"Am I?" She leant in closer, close enough that I could smell her expensive perfume, something floral and cloying. “Let me tell you something, Cadence. From the moment I found out that my plans wouldn’t work, that my pregnancy with you was a waste of time, I tried to get rid of you. You were lucky though, he didn’t want you, but still wouldn’t let me go to the clinic.
He was punishing me for daring to defy him.
” Her face took on a twisted expression as she stepped towards me.
“So I had to improvise. I locked myself in the bathroom with one of your grandmother's knitting needles. I shoved the needle up into my cunt and tried to stab you out of me.”
“Alyssa, I mean it, stop now,” Cole snarled. I was paralysed, I couldn’t move as she spat out more words.
“But your grandfather,” she snarled, “Oh, your precious grandfather, he was told what I was doing, told to stop me, and he kicked in the door and did exactly what they wanted. Then do you know what they did, Cadence?” I shook my head.
I had heard enough. I couldn’t hear any more, but she didn’t stop, didn’t care that we had a crowd of people around us, listening in on the horror story that she was recounting.
“After the hospital declared me physically healthy, they had me locked up in Lexington, locked up Cadence. He took my freedom from me and forced me to give birth to you.” She spat that last part out so hard that I felt the spittle from her words on my face.
“No,” I whispered.
“Yes,” she snarled. “So that is why I left you. Your precious grandfather made me leave. Because you are nothing to me, nothing more than a failed abortion.”
The world seemed to tilt beneath my feet.
A buzzing filled my ears, drowning out everything except her cruel words, echoing over and over in my mind.
Failed abortion. Failed abortion. Failed abortion.
I was vaguely aware of Cole's arm wrapping around my waist, steadying me.
Of gasps from the people nearby who had overheard.
Of my mother's cold, satisfied smile as she watched her words land, watched them destroy me piece by piece.
"Cade, come on," Cole urged, his voice sounding far away.
"We need to go." But I couldn't move. Couldn't speak.
Couldn't breathe. Everything I'd ever believed about myself, about my past, about my mother's absence, it all crumbled around me, leaving nothing but jagged shards of truth too painful to touch.
"That's right," my mother said, her voice softening to mock gentleness. "Go with your owner. Play your little whore games. But remember what I said, you don't belong in this world, Cadence. You never did, and you never will."
Something inside me broke then, a dam bursting, releasing a flood of emotions too powerful to contain. I stumbled backward, bumping into someone, hearing the smash of glass, mumbling an apology I couldn't hear over the roaring in my ears.
"Cade, " Cole reached for me, but I was already turning, pushing blindly through the crowd, needing to escape, to breathe, to be anywhere but here.
I was vaguely aware of faces turning to watch me go, of whispers following in my wake. The grand ballroom seemed endless, a maze of glittering obstacles between me and freedom. I knocked into a waiter, sending champagne glasses crashing to the floor, but I couldn't stop to apologise.
Finally, I reached the massive doors and burst through them, out into the entrance hall and then into the cool night air.
The contrast was shocking, from the stifling heat and noise of the ballroom to the quiet chill of the city night.
I gulped in air that tasted of exhaust and rain, my lungs burning, my vision blurred by tears I could no longer hold back.
I made it halfway down the grand steps before my legs gave out.
I sank down onto the cold stone, my purple silk dress pooling around me, my carefully styled hair coming loose from its pins.
And then I was crying, deep, wracking sobs that shook my entire body, tears streaming down my face, ruining the makeup Luce had so carefully applied hours earlier.
Failed abortion. The words echoed in my head, a cruel mantra.
My own mother had tried to end my existence before it had even properly begun.
Had resented me for surviving. Had abandoned me not out of necessity or circumstance, but out of pure, uncomplicated rejection.
I heard footsteps behind me, and then Cole was there, kneeling beside me on the steps.
"Cade," he said softly, reaching for me. "I'm so sorry. I'm so fucking sorry." I tried to pull away, to hide my face, my breakdown, my humiliation.
"Leave me alone," I managed between sobs. "Please, just, just go away."
But Cole didn't leave. Instead, he gathered me into his arms, one hand cradling the back of my head, the other wrapping around my waist, pulling me against his chest. I struggled briefly, then collapsed against him, too broken to fight anymore.