Chapter 69
69
Bel
FFS do you realise we could’ve done it last night if you’d not turned me begging for your body into ‘not liking you that much’? I was really going to put some effort in too. You are extraordinary.
Connor
Believe me, I hate myself more than you ever could right now.
Bel
Makes a change.
Connor
Doesn’t it?
(can I say I’m almost high with the feeling I can be totally honest with you?)
(also strap in, I’ve now got four hours in a car and Dad’s blasting talkSPORT)
Bel
Same, so I can ask you anything?
Connor
Absolutely.
Bel
Without Shaun’s card, would you ever have told me?
Connor
I refuse to give my brother that much credit. I think I’d have WhatsApped you to death and you’d have started to have suspicions.
If I hadn’t come round, would you have told me?
Bel
I think I’d have made up a reason to travel down for a meeting just so I could see you. But I was so scared of successfully ‘staying friends’ then accidentally shooting myself in the face by having to meet your next girlfriend *skull emoji*
Connor
Oh God same re: next boyfriend. I HATE THAT GUY.
Bel
(He’s you) x
Connor
Worked myself up into such a state about him that even though he’s me, I can’t immediately forgive myself x
Bel
What if we’d gone the rest of our lives, both feigning indifference to each other, never knowing we felt the same way? I bet that’s how our bleak play ‘Fucked’ ended, you know. Critics’ Circle Awards all round.
Connor
No chance. I thought of it as more of a sitcom. I would’ve eventually got trashed and messaged ‘can’t stop thinking about ur boobs’ and then had to investigate assisted dying.
Bel
HAHAHHAHHAHA (can’t you? Last night I was worried you liked my great personality but I was physically as alluring as a urinal cake)
Connor
Yes it’s like a sickness. Your fault for relentlessly flaunting them at me. (Don’t be insane. I was that close to asking my dad if he could wait in the car for an hour.)
Bel
Wait for nine to ten minutes, surely?
Connor
Sassy. I promise you that you will regret sassing my prowess.
Bel
3 This week’s going to last forever, Connor x
Connor
My thoughts exactly x