Chapter Ten
Chloe
It’s so beautiful out here. Chloe can’t believe how calm everything is. She feels like she can finally breathe here. Like she had been subconsciously holding her breath in New York for years, holding in all the tension and fear of failure. But here in Montana, she can finally breathe.
Her entire life was spent in New York City.
She was used to the hustle and bustle. The rude people, the sadness, and the stress that went along with being a New Yorker.
But here it’s like everything is different.
It’s slower, eating, sleeping, and even showering.
There isn’t the constant rush, the forever running from one place to another.
It’s calm, relaxing. And she feels like she can get used to it.
She had taken a book with her on what she deemed was her new favorite hike.
Nestled on a boulder with her back against a tree, she reads for hours till the sun starts to fall, and she knows she needs to head back.
Her stomach grumbles, and she realizes she hasn’t eaten since breakfast. Axel had told her to let Jack or Mary Lou know, and they would pack her lunch to take with her, but she just wanted to go.
Didn’t want to waste even a moment of her vacation.
Chloe didn’t think she would like it. The trip had started off so terribly, but Axel had fixed it, he had saved the day.
Carrying her, holding her, taking her to the store.
He was a man unlike any she had met before.
Kind, gentle. He looked at her like she was the sole focus of his attention.
Like he wanted to know everything about her.
But she had barely seen him the past two days.
Two new guests had arrived, businessmen who continuously wore suits and seemed unhappy with everything around them.
She wondered if they had anything to do with Axel being out of sight for the past two days.
She missed him as much as one person could miss another when they didn’t really know them.
She felt drawn to him. Like she was meant to know him, like they were meant to be together.
But that was probably just her mind romancing the kindness of a man.
It had been so long, so very long since she’d been cared for.
Hugged even. And Axel, carrying her around, had made her feel like a princess, like she was worthy.
Making her way back down the trail, she is soon back at the lodge. She peeks in the front, hoping to see Axel manning the desk, but it is Gunner instead.
“Can I help you with something, ma’am?”
She is embarrassed immediately, and knows she was caught looking for something.
“I was wondering if you knew where Axel is? I hadn’t seen him in a couple of days.”
Gunner smiles like he knows a secret and tells her to hold on, disappearing down a hallway to the side.
Chloe clutches her book between both hands.
She’s nervous, she doesn’t really have a reason to see Axel.
Doesn’t know if he’s interested in her, so many men aren’t.
Doesn’t know if he’s single or even likes women, or if he would ever look at her that way.
After a minute, Axel comes around the corner. His hair looks wet like he recently showered, and she has to stop herself from going to him to run her fingers through it.
“Did you need something, Chloe? Everything ok?”
“Oh. Yes, everything’s fine. I just hadn’t seen you in a while.”
His face lights up, and she wants to melt a little at how great his smile is.
It’s warm and bright and directed at her.
She blushes furiously and dips her head to look at the ground.
She can hear him step closer, and she raises her head back up to look at him, meeting his gaze head-on.
His eyes are gold like always, brilliant and beautiful.
“I did say I would take you on a horseback ride.”
“Yes, the activities. I haven’t signed up for any yet.”
“No, ma’am. Not an activity. I would like to take you on a horseback ride. If it’s not too presumptuous.”
She can feel her face flame even hotter, and his eyes flit all over it. She shakes her head no. “A horseback ride would be nice, I would like that very much.”
His wide smile gets even wider, and she loves that she did that to him.
“Great, great.” He clasps his palms together. “We can meet here tomorrow after breakfast, say nine? I’ll have everything ready to go.”
“Great, yes. That’s...great. Ok then, I’m just going to go to bed.”
“Don’t you want to have some dinner first?” he chuckles. Not meanly, but like he thinks her floundering is cute.
“Yes! Dinner. I’ll go do that,” she ducks her head to hide her blush and heads towards the dining room. She knows she probably won’t see him the rest of the night, as the staff doesn’t eat with the guests. But tomorrow they’re going horseback riding. Tomorrow, she has a date.
It is a date, right? He didn’t offer for Danielle to come along. He said it wasn’t a paid activity, that he wanted to take her. But maybe he’s just being polite. Maybe he takes all the guests horseback riding.
That thought flies out of her head when he greets her at the front desk with a yellow daisy.
“Mornin’ Chloe.”
“Morning, Axel.”
He holds out the flower towards her, “May I?”
She doesn’t know what he’s asking, but nods yes and holds her breath as he steps closer. He tucks the yellow daisy behind her ear into her hair, and she smells the soft, sweet scent that comes from the flower. She blushes hard, it seems to be her go-to reaction around him.
“Beautiful,” he says, eyes flitting over her face. She wants to lean into him, rest her head on his chest, and have him stroke her back. She wants to smell him. How he must smell like wood and forest and man. Instead, she meets his eyes and smiles.
“Ready?” he asks her and leads her gently out the front of the lodge. He walks with a hand softly in the small of her back, and she doesn’t remember ever feeling this cared for. He is kind, masculine, polite, and nothing like the other men she’s been out with.
They walk in silence to the stables. His hand is a hot brand on her back that she wants to stop and lean into. Levi is there at the stables fixing a saddle on a beautiful chocolate brown horse. Chloe notices the horse is a little smaller than the one standing next to it.
“This here is Delilah. I don’t know if you remember her.”
“Yes, hi girl.” Chloe holds out her hand like Axel had shown her last time and lets the horse sniff her before petting the side of its face and neck.
Axel moves over to the other horse, a bigger, darker male with a white diamond on its forehead. “This is Roscoe, he’s mine. Tough old guy, aren’t ya?”
The horse shakes its head a little and stomps its foot as if it understands Axel.
“Everything’s ready to go, boss,” Levi tells Axel, patting Delilah on the back.
“I’ll help you up, ma’am,” Axel says. He procures a stool from somewhere and sets it beside Delilah. “You’re going to put your foot here and then step up and swing over.”
Chloe looks at the horse with trepidation. Even though it’s smaller than Axel’s horse, it’s still a big beast, a big beast that can throw her if it wants.
“It’s ok, she’s a safe horse. I won’t let anything happen to you.
” Chloe looks at Axel and sees the sincerity in his words.
She steps on the stool and puts her foot in the stirrup.
When she tries to step up into it, she realizes she isn’t strong enough and bounces back down onto the stool, a frustrated huff leaving her lips.
“May I?” Axel asks. “I can boost you up, but I’ll need to put my hand on your...derriere.”
Chloe smiles and looks down at her feet. “That’s fine, I don’t mind.”
Axel counts down, and she pushes up with her foot in the stirrup again. She feels his hand push on her ass, but it’s clinical more than anything, and it doesn’t linger. Soon she’s settled in the saddle and feels proud that she’s made it this far.
Axel attaches bags to each side of his saddle and mounts easily, not needing a stool, she notices.
He makes a clucking noise and pulls on the reins to turn his horse, and they both start off, Delilah following like she already knows where they’re going.
They're silent as the horses plod down the trail.
The silence is easy, comfortable. It's not awkward like she thought it might be.
Everything about this Montana lodge is not what she expected.
It's inviting and relaxing. It's what she never knew she needed.
She wonders how Axel fits into all that.
She can't see herself back in New York City after being here. Doesn't know how she can fit back in that mold of hardworking, fast-paced New York life. But this is a vacation, right? People love being on vacation and don’t want to go back, that’s all this is. Nothing more.
It doesn’t matter that she wants this man on the horse. Doesn’t matter that she feels free here. Relaxed and calm, and like she found something she’s been looking for her whole life. None of it matters, because it’s a vacation and that’s all.
She feels her brows furrow at this realization.
That all of this means nothing. That Axel means nothing.
But she needs to keep herself separate, she doesn’t want to get hurt.
Life in New York had been so lonely before, and she doesn’t want to add to that by getting her hopes up about a life and a man in Montana.
This isn’t her home, and she guesses that when she leaves, she’ll never see it or Axel again.
The path is beautiful, and Axel points out various plant life as they meander along.
He turns and looks at her a couple of times.
A frown on his face, and he looks like he’s thinking about her.
But every time she catches him looking, she turns away, pretending to be looking at the foliage or the trees.
She doesn’t want him to see her like this, so broken she doesn’t know how to fix it.
The ride makes her more depressed the further they go.