Chapter 9 #2
“I’m a simple woman at heart.”
He couldn’t agree more. Women he knew wanted to attend runway fashion shows in Paris. Rub elbows with princes in Dubai. Take a villa in Rome or Venice and shop, spending thousands of dollars on things they might not ever wear. That kind of woman didn’t appeal to Sullivan.
His gaze met hers.
This was the woman he wanted. Desperately. Hesitancy filled him, though. He would be heading back to his life in New York soon. He couldn’t dally with her feelings, yet every fiber in his being told him he would be making a mistake if he didn’t spend as much time as possible with her.
He steered them so that they headed back in the other direction now.
A comfortable silence blanketed them, something he wasn’t used to when he was in the company of another woman.
Sullivan believed he had never been his authentic self in the presence of any other woman.
Being with Piper was like coming home, coming to a place he hadn’t known existed, and yet it was one both familiar and special to him.
“What’s your biggest regret?” he asked.
She mulled over his question and then said, “The biggest is not finishing college. At the time, I was twenty and college classes seemed like a waste of time, mostly just a rehash of what I’d done in high school.
Mila told me those first two years were all about weeding out people.
That those who stayed the course were rewarded when they earned their degrees.
All I really enjoyed were my theater and music classes.
And performing. When a friend told me about the auditions for a new touring troupe, I went to Houston on a whim and was thrilled when they accepted me.
It was just a place in the chorus, but all I could think of was that I was now a professional actor and being paid to do what I loved. ”
Piper paused. “Don’t get me wrong, Sullivan.
I have thoroughly enjoyed performing all these years.
Singing and dancing on stage. Bringing joy to others.
It’s a natural high. At the same time, I wish I would have returned to school after that first tour.
Even if I would’ve gotten my degree in theater, at least it would have been a degree. Now, I feel too old to go back.”
“That’s not true. You’re never too old to learn.”
She smiled ruefully. “Maybe I didn’t word that the right way.
I wouldn’t mind going back to school, but I don’t have a way to support myself if I did so.
I’m not about to ask Mom and Dad to pay for their thirty-year-old daughter to finish college, especially with them on the cusp of retirement.
I’m an adult, responsible for myself. I have to live with the consequences of my actions from years ago.
I’ll find something I enjoy doing right here in the Bay.
I just won’t be as well compensated as say, an architect with a fancy degree from Yale. ”
Piper gave him a sad smile, and he hated that her options were so limited, but he knew they were. A degree set job applicants apart. Even though she was bright, not having one would keep her from getting in the door most places.
She looked at him, her eyes soulful. “Do you have any regrets?”
“I’ve never really thought about that. I would say that I regret not standing up to my parents more.
Yes, I rebelled at first and ran away, hitchhiking my way to Maine.
They simply brought me back. Actually, they were too busy to come themselves.
They sent their driver. I do regret not ever having seen my grandparents alive again, though.
We always wrote letters to one another, but I would give anything to spend just one more hour with them.
“After they were gone, it was as if I flipped a switch. I became who my parents insisted I be because it was just easier not to fight about it anymore. I had a lot of pressure on me because I had an older brother who drowned when I was a baby. Mother had a difficult pregnancy with me and couldn’t have any more children after I was born, so they pinned all their hopes on me—and I morphed into the perfect son.
I earned top grades. Excelled in athletics.
Moved through society with ease. They were able to totally disassociate with me, yet they still bragged about all my many accomplishments to their friends. ”
He swallowed. “I still see them on occasion. I actually went home for Christmas last year. They take no joy in holidays such as that. It’s all about setting the table with the right china and having the best caterer serve Christmas dinner to a bunch of people they talk about badly behind their backs but smile to their faces and welcome them to their table.
I should’ve stayed in the Bay and celebrated with my new friends and Neville and Nellie. ”
“I hate to say this, Sullivan, but it sounds like you lead a really lonely life. At least I made friends on the road with my fellow cast and crew. You don’t seem to have anyone in New York.”
“I have Zane,” he said. “He’s like a brother to me.
His flesh and blood brother is a real piece of work.
They barely speak to one another. You’re right, Piper.
I meet with other people regarding various Wagner projects, but because of my line of work, I’m left on my own a lot of the time as I research and draw up my plans.
I enjoy getting out of New York and traveling to different sites, but that’s temporary. ”
Sullivan came to a halt and gazed across the water.
“I’ve actually stayed in the Bay much longer than I normally do anywhere else.
I told Zane I found something good here.
Something real and pure. I’ve lingered on the coast, enjoying the friendships I’ve made as I’ve started a new project.
I’m thirty-four and have attained professional success and financial security, but I don’t really have anything to show for my life beyond that.
That’s a hard pill to swallow, especially thinking back to what I thought I would be doing by my mid-thirties. ”
He cupped her cheek. “Maybe you could help me to find myself before I move on.”
His thumb stroked her cheek, and Sullivan yearned to kiss her. His gut told him that wouldn’t be the right thing to do, though. Piper had returned home to put down roots. To find a man to love and cherish her and share the rest of her life. He let his hand fall away.
“Let’s get you home.”
They trudged up the unwieldy sand dunes and returned to his car. He opened her door, and she got in. They didn’t speak on the short drive to the inn. When they reached the Bay Breeze, he got out and escorted her to the door.
Sullivan brushed a kiss on her cheek. “Thank you for tonight. I haven’t bared my soul to anyone like I did to you tonight, Piper. I appreciate you listening to me. For being my friend.”
Turning, he trotted down the stairs. He would wait in the car and make certain she got inside okay, and then he would head home. It was time to pack his things and leave Driftwood Bay.
Before his heart hurt so much that it would make leaving unbearable.
“Wait!” she called.
Reluctantly, he turned to face her again. They stared at one another wordlessly, and then she raced down the stairs and threw her arms around him.
“Don’t go,” she begged. “I don’t want you to.”
Knowing it was a mistake to stay—and that both of them were going to be badly hurt in the long run—he enveloped her in his arms anyway. His lips came crashing down on hers.
At least for now, everything was right.