Chapter 11
The more I’m around him, the more familiar he seems. And the less empty I feel.
I study his profile, the features on his face, wanting to memorize them and fuse them with my lost memories.
He’s beautiful—strong and delicate at the same time.
My entire body craves him like a drug. Just being next to him right now makes me feel high.
We pull into the clearing Cherry told me about. Apparently it’s the one we used to party at when we were in high school. It’s secluded and private, mostly because the properties that once thrived in these hills are now decayed and abandoned.
The locals still get drunk up here but not this early in the evening.
So we should have the whole clearing to ourselves.
It’s nice to be away from everyone’s curious stares.
I finally did an internet search and found out how famous Punk is.
It’s another piece of the puzzle in my head that feels familiar but one I still can’t quite grasp.
After doing another search on myself, I learned that I’m quite infamous around here too.
Punk kills the engine and the lights. The sun is almost below the horizon, the sky an ethereal shade of deep blue like sapphire. There’s just enough light to see his face. His gaze meets mine, sending a flurry of butterflies to my stomach.
“Hey, pretty girl. Tell me what you need.” His voice is raspy and full of so much ache.
I tuck a strand of dark hair behind my ear, my fingers trembling. Something about this man makes me nervous. It’s the way he looks at me like I’m his North Star. “I don’t know. I want to remember. But I don’t know what I actually need. Maybe it’s you… I don’t feel sick when you’re next to me.”
He reaches over and runs his thumb across the scar on the side of my head. “I like your hair like this. It suits you.”
I release a shaky breath. “Maybe I’ll keep it. I could get a tattoo to cover the scar.”
He drags his thumb down my jawline. “That would look badass. I think you’re beautiful either way. I’ll shave my head and get a tattoo to match.”
This man loves me. There’s no question. His devotion to me is otherworldly. And even without logic or reason, I know that I love him.
I place my hand over his, pressing his palm to my cheek as I close my eyes. I take a deep breath, inhaling the scent of musk and something sugary like cotton candy. The same sweetness I smelled on his fingers at the corn maze.
When I open my eyes and meet his gaze, his are glassy. Like he wants to cry but is using every ounce of his willpower to hold it together. I lean forward and press my lips to his, giving him a soft peck.
He sighs. “Fuck. Roxy…” His voice breaks.
I know his lips. I knew he’d taste as sweet as he smells. “Have you ever missed something you didn’t know you had?”
He cups my face in both his hands now. “Every single fucking day before I met you. And now the agony of never being with you again is enough to make me want to drive off this cliff.”
My heart skips, my pulse racing. “I was scared at first, but you’ve been haunting my dreams ever since I woke up in that hospital. I believe we were happy together. I don’t care what my mama says. The only time my anxiety goes away is when I’m with you. So… I think I’d like to try again.”
His eyes widen before he pulls my face to his. I gasp as his tongue slides inside my mouth. My belly flutters and moisture gathers between my thighs, my pussy tingling. Aching. Desperate for him.
I moan and dig my nails into his hair as our kiss deepens. Our tongues collide and tangle in a long overdue dance of lust and craving and vicious need. He wraps his hand around my throat, and it feels like home.
When we finally pull apart, he leaves a trail of kisses from my jaw down to my collarbone.
“I will worship you forever. I promise you. There is nothing I won’t give you, do for you…
be for you. I am eternally yours to do whatever you want with.
” He rolls his tongue across my shoulder before pinching my flesh between his teeth and nibbling.
“Break me, punch me, fuck me until neither of us can walk or even breathe. I’m at your mercy, pretty girl. ”
His words are like melodies. Like sinful lullabies that soothe all my fears and stoke the fire between my legs. With each kiss, the pieces click together faster. Fragments and images fly around in my head, consuming me, urging me to drown inside the foggy memories. To embrace them.
“Punk…” I plead.
He knows what I want. What I need.
“Come here, baby.” He yanks me across the seats, pulling me to him, my back flush against his chest. He kisses the side of my neck while he lifts my shirt up. A shiver dances up my spine as he caresses my belly. I blow out a deep breath, close my eyes, and rest the back of my head on his shoulder.
An invitation. Permission. An act of submission.
He unzips my pants and slides his hand inside my panties.
I arch my back as he glides his fingers down the slit of pussy. “Kiss me and make me cum. Please.”
“Mmm, fuck. I love it when you beg for me.” He thrusts his tongue inside my mouth and two fingers inside my pussy at the same time. My breath catches in my throat. This is what I need. What I’ve always needed.
I rock against his hand, chasing my orgasm like it’s the only thing that will bring me back to life. I moan louder as he stretches me with another finger. He thrusts in deeper and presses his thumb hard against my clit.
“That’s it, baby,” he rasps. “Cum like your life depends on it. Fuck. Yeah. There you go.”
I turn my head and scream into his neck as every nerve in my body ignites. “Punk,” I whine. “Oh my god. Fuck.”
“I’m right here, Roxy. I’ll always be right here.” He pulls his fingers out and presses them to my lips. “Open your mouth,” he murmurs.
He slides his cum-soaked fingers to the back of my tongue. I pucker my lips around them and suck. I gag as he taps the back of my throat, my chest heaving. Another spasm stirs in my core, the pressure building again. I grind my ass against his cock, coaxing another orgasm with the friction.
“You’re so fucking hot. Fuck.” He shoves his free hand back down my pants and flicks my clit. “I want this pussy raw and fucking swollen,” he growls.
I’m wild, feral, and completely untethered from reality. I scrape my teeth against his fingers as he fucks my mouth and my pussy. Harder than before. Rougher. A sound I don’t recognize unfurls from my throat. We become monsters. Rabid animals baring our fangs and our claws to each other.
Without warning, he shoves me forward and yanks my pants and shoes off. “I need more of you.”
I moan and bite my lip as he spreads my thighs apart. He slides his thick cock inside me as I dig my nails into the leather seats, not caring if I destroy them.
“This is home.” He slips out and then slams back in, knocking me forward from the force. “This is where I belong. Where you belong.”
I leave handprints on the fogged-up windows as I brace myself, using the glass as leverage. With every thrust, I gain back another fragment of my tattered heart. “Yes… Don’t ever let me go, Punk.”
He grinds in so deep I can almost feel him in my stomach. “Never. If you die, I will follow you. I will stalk you through heaven or hell. Or wherever the fuck souls like ours end up. I will always follow you.”
“Yes. Harder. Please. Tear me apart,” I beg.
He pushes me farther down and pins my thighs to the leather seat. “I’m going to fucking destroy you.”
His sick obsession is also mine. It makes me come alive, and I feel whole again. It’s a twisted kind of love, toxic and all-consuming. But I don’t want it any other way. I clench around him, squeezing the walls of my pussy so tight, it’s all he can do but cum hard inside me.
We both cry out, and it feels like salvation. My nerves are raw and on fire, as he chases his own release. He buries the entire length of his cock inside me, filling me with his thick cum.
He pants for air as he leaves a trail of kisses down my spine. “Someday I’m going to put a baby inside you, pretty girl. A little angel made by two devils.”
Another shiver rolls through me, but my belly warms. We’ve barely reconnected, but the thought of carrying his child does something feral to my ovaries. To my heart.
I whimper and wipe the drool from my mouth with the back of my hand. “I’ll give you whatever you want, Punk. As soon as I get better.”
He pulls me back up and into his arms. “I will get you the best care money can buy. Let’s get the fuck out of here and go home.”
The high of this moment gets sucked out of me as soon as he says it. “I can’t yet. My mama has a court order holding me here.”
Punk stiffens. He turns me around to face him. “Is that what she told you?”
I bite my lip, my stomach knotting. “Um. Yeah. She waved it in my face when she came and got me from the hospital.”
His nostrils flare, and the devil himself flashes in his eyes. “It’s a lie, Roxy. She took out a restraining order on me. Which I still don’t know how the fuck she got. But that doesn’t extend to you.”
What the fuck? “I-I’m confused. What do you mean? I saw the paper.”
He clenches his jaw. “Baby, I looked into it. It was a temporary agreement that you would be released into her care for a few weeks while you healed. That date has passed. You’re free to leave whenever the fuck you want.”
I feel my cheeks heat. My blood boiling. “Fuck. Why would she keep me here? She doesn’t even fucking like me.”
Punk grinds his teeth, his anger growing fast. “Wait. Fuck.” He grabs his phone and starts tapping the screen, his fingers flying as his eyes dart back and forth. “Fuck,” he grits out as he shows me the screen.
There’s a bunch of numbers. Large fucking numbers. “What the fuck am I looking at, Punk?”
“It’s your bank account. The one I put money into. Thousands of dollars have been taken out. She’s stealing from you. From us. Unless you’re stockpiling cash in your mattress for some reason.”
I shake my head in disbelief. “No. I didn’t know it existed. I only have one credit card in my wallet. I checked; it has like a five-hundred-dollar limit.”
Punk starts the engine and flips on the headlights. Before we take off, he dials his phone. After a few prompts, a voice blares through. He puts it on speaker.
“Thank you for calling Lavender Heights Savings. How can I assist you?”
“I want to report a stolen debit card,” Punk states with a calm that doesn’t match the wild expression on his face.
I tune out the rest of the call, swept away by my mother’s betrayal. My thoughts fester, burning the blood in my veins like poison. I ball my fists and dig my nails into the palms of my hands, grounding myself with the pain.
She lied to me, stole from me, and tried to turn me against the only person who has ever truly loved me.
I don’t even notice he’s hung up until we’re moving, snaking our way back down the dirt trail of the desolate woods.
“I-I’m sorry,” I murmur.
He jerks his head, his eyes murderous. “No. I’m the one who’s sorry. I should’ve never left you alone with her. This is all my fault. I should’ve done a lot of things differently. But it ends tonight. You don’t have to worry about anything, Roxy. I’m going to fix this.”
I nod and lean back against the seats. But the closer we get to Mama’s house, the more unhinged Punk looks, and I wonder what he’s going to do.