Chapter 9 Ghosts of Home #2
“I’m here because your mother asked me to stop by. She thought it might be nice to see old friends after everything you’d gone through. That’s all,” Sam replied in one breath.
“Friends? We’re not friends, Sam.”
“Lana, come on. You have to let bygones be bygones,” her Aunt interjected.
“No disrespect, Auntie, but this is between Sam and me.”
Her Aunt put her hands up in retreat and took a long sip of her iced tea. Lana caught the underlying implication of the Kermit-the-Frog-meme-like gesture and turned her head back to Sam.
“I appreciate, more than you will ever know, that you somehow made it to Hamby,” she looked over at Carmen, who dropped her gaze to her chicken.
“And because of that, you saved Kayden. I told you all this in the hospital a couple of months ago. But please let’s call a spade a spade.
You wined and dined me and made me feel like we had a future together.
Hell, you proposed to me, made me plan a wedding, then humiliated me in front of everyone we both know. ”
Sam stopped chewing, then his eyes met hers, pained. Lana continued, “The very people you’re trying to convince that you care so much about me were the ones who had to piece me back together. I thought I’d never get my life back.”
Lana couldn’t help the tears that were freely falling from her face now, and everyone just watched on in silence.
“They may have forgotten or can let bygones be bygones, but I can’t. You hurt me, Sam. You broke me, but I’m not the same broken girl I once was. I love Kayden Capshaw. More than I have ever loved you, so you know that’s saying something. And I won’t let you disrespect me or him a second longer.”
“Lana, I’m sorry...” he started.
“Just stop.” She stood from the table, panting, not realizing during her rant that she had been yelling because she was physically spent delivering her speech.
Sam stood from the table, locking eyes with her, anger crinkling his face.
“I really hope you wake up and realize, Lana, that I’m not the enemy anymore. I’m sorry for what I did; I know what I lost. I will have to remember that every day for the rest of my life. But look at what you have been through since you met this guy.”
Lana felt her heart hammering in her chest, not wanting to listen to another second of anything he had to say. She turned to leave, but he continued, making her stop and turn back around.
“A psychotic mother who tried to blackmail you. His ex, who actually did, then...I’m sorry, ran you both down in the middle of a street and almost killed both of you!
You’re in love with that? Is that somehow less wrong than what I did?
I’ve never made you feel unsafe or put you in any danger, Lana, never, and he can’t say that,” Sam spat out.
His words stung, but only a little. She wasn’t in love with the drama of what happened, and that seemed to be what everyone in her life didn’t understand.
“All that may be true, but here’s the difference between him and you,” she yelled, “Those things happened to both of us; he never did any of those things to me himself. “ He has never, not once, in any of this, made me feel less than the most loved, most important person in his entire life,” she yelled. “He has never made me question myself or my choices, and he has never, ever made me cry.” You, cannot say the same!”
With those last words, Lana took off towards the house, leaving everyone sitting at the table in shock.
As she weaved through the house, she made a beeline to the hall bathroom and closed the door, locking it behind her.
She sat on the toilet and cried for what felt like ages before the small knock on the door came through.
Lana stood, opened the door, and found Sam waving a white paper napkin in the air.
Her eyes immediately rolled at his presence.
“What now?” she asked, as she snatched it and blew her nose on it.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“Sure,” she replied, flushing it down the toilet.
“No, really, I am. I’m sorry for being a coward and walking out on you the way I did.
I’m sorry for all the gossip at the hospital that made it almost impossible for you to work there.
But mostly, I’m sorry for letting someone as special and as beautiful and as brave as you slip through my fingers. ”
She looked up at him, surprised, not expecting to hear any of that from him.
“Thanks?” she replied, unsure of what to say.
The truth was, she didn’t need his apologies anymore. She didn’t even need a reason why anymore. All of it was behind her, and she wanted everyone else to feel the same.
“I’m gonna get out of here and let you enjoy your family. But just listen to me.”
He looked down at her, sincerity written all over his face.
“Think about what it is you’re doing, OK?
” he started, “I know you love each other. I could see it all over him whenever I got anywhere near you, and I respect him for doing what I couldn’t.
But that ex of his? There’s a reason she’s not in jail, Lana, and I don’t trust her, his mother, or the situation.
God forbid she tries anything else and is successful the next time.
I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t tell you to keep your eyes and ears open when you’re up there.
Don’t forget my brother works for the Feds.
If you ever need help with anything, I’m only a phone call away. ”
Before she could retort, he walked away and left her in the darkened bathroom alone.
He was right. Kim was a serious danger, one she was very aware of.
She knew what he was saying was an extension of what her family was feeling.
They were scared for her, and she was scared all the time.
Except here—here was home. There were no angry townspeople or glaring stares.
There were no batshit crazy girlfriends to taunt her, or a manipulative mother-in-law to undermine her.
She was surrounded by people who loved and cared for her, and she didn’t have to watch her back every second of the day.
But the one person who made any of it OK was Kayden.
If anything, Sam’s speech only reinforced what she felt before she left Hamby.
She would fight for her man. Kayden was her future, and he was her new home.